TW: mention of vomit and trying to off yourself ⚠️⚠️
anna pov
i woke up with eva still in my arms her peaceful sleeping face is the best thing to wake up to
i laid there for a minute then i grabbed my phone is was 9:38 am i also had a text from alana saying that we have a photo shoot today at 3:45 pm texted her back to say ok
eva moved a little bit so i looked at her she was smiling with her eyes closed so i don't know if she's awake or just having a good dream
i pulled up snap on my phone and took a picture or two of my beautiful girlfriend i sent them to her so she'll see them when she wakes up
i really needed to pee and brush my teeth so i was able to slide out from under her to go to the bathroom
i got done doing my biz so i brush my teeth then went back to eva
i shook her to wake her up because we need to get ready since we need to leave around 3 to get there 20 minutes easily and la traffic is terrifying
"eva bubba you need to get up and get ready it's like 10 and we have a shoot at 3:45" i said with my morning voice
"i'll get up i guess since your voice is hot" eva said rolling over to look at me
she sat up then went to the bathroom
she peeked through the door after a couple minutes "you wanna take a shower with me so we can get ready quicker"
"umm sure just lemme do some really quick" i said back walking out of our room
i want to just get some clothes and change the temp of the house because we have it cold at night so we can sleep better
i walk back to the bathroom seeing eva on her phone waiting for me while she was naked
"ohh i didn't expect you to be naked and not in the shower but i like this" i said walking up to her hugging her tightly
she put her head in my neck and kissed it softly and gently sucking it too
"eva you can't be leaving hickeys we have a shoot today remember" i said she frowned after i said that
"i want people to know her mine though" she pouted
"maybe you could leave some after the shoot ok" i asked her putting hair behind her ear she nodded back
i got undressed then we both went in the shower i stood behind her while hugging her
she grabbed the shampoo "you wanna do it for me" she said while turning her head slightly to look at me i nodded then grabbed the shampoo
i lather it good in her hair then i did my own hair too while eva rinses hers
we got done with the shower then got dressed we didn't do our makeup because we had to get it done for the shoot at the place we're going
eva went downstairs to make breakfast for us i told her i didn't care what she made
i stayed upstairs because eva said she's bringing me the food upstairs it's her treat i guess i don't know but i love her so i can't complain
i laid down for a bit waiting for eva i hear a tiny knock on the door i knew it was eva letting me know she's coming up
"hey bubba" she said peeking through the door with food in her hand
"hi" i said back while smiling looking at her
she walked over sat down and gave me the food putting it on my lap
"youre eating this too right" i said concerned because there was really only one serving
she had a guilt look on her face "i'm not hungry right now" she looked down after speaking
i lifted her chin up with my finger "eva tell me the truth"
"i don't want to eat because i feel over weight and we have a shoot today i don't wanna look fat in the pictures" she said lying down
"eva look at me" she looks at me "youre not fat youre anything but fat and youre beautiful your body needs food to help your body function so we're sharing this plate got it" i said
she nodded back i gave her the first bite of food making sure she eats something before me
we got done eating and i looked over at eva after placing the plate down on the night stand she looked really pale to me
"you ok" i softly said while putting my hand up to her cheek
"mhm" eva said back
"bub go to the bathroom you look like youre gonna throw up" i said
she darted to the bathroom i heard throwing up so i ran to the bathroom and help her hair up while she kept throwing up
what happened did she get like a bug or what
"i'm sorry anna" she said standing up for the toilet
"no no bub youre alright did you eat something last night because i've never seen you not want to eat or anything" i concerningly questioned her
she shrugged her shoulders while getting her tooth brush to brush her teeth
she got done and went back to the best room i checked my phone 2:40 pm is the time
"hey eva you ok enough to do the shoot still" i yelled from the bathroom
"yea i think so" she said back
"ok if you don't feel good while we're there just tell me" i yelled again
—
we got in the car i started it and we headed off
i looked at eva who was looking out the window i put my hand on her thigh so make sure to let her know she's ok
she looked at me "bub why don't you put on some music" i said
she smiled at me then grabbed her phone and connected it to the car bluetooth
we jammed out on the way to the place eva seemed better now so i think we're in the clear for now
we made it to where we needed to go eva seems good right now also
we got in to see alana and the photographer waiting for us
"hey love birds" alana said in a weird voice
"heyyy" eva said dragging the 'y'
"here are your clothes for this photo shoot the bathrooms are over there take as long as you need" the photographer said to eva and i handing us the clothes
it's matching outfits they're literally so cute too
we went to the bathroom to get changed i got done quicker than eva so while she was changing i was taking pictures of myself in the mirror to show my private a sneak peek of the outfit for pictures
(the fit is something like this just the shirt is not a cropped tank it's a black short sleeve instead)
"you ready" eva asked me i nodded back
we walked out together hand in hand
"we're ready if you are" i said out loud so everyone could hear it
"ok then let's get right into it" the photographer said
he made us sit down for the first picture i was sitting down with my hands behind my back keeping me up right then eva was sitting down with her legs crossed facing me
he had us look at eachother with he took the picture while he was taking the pictures i swear i fell inlove with evas eyes even more
the next picture he still had me sitting down this time i had my legs crossed then eva went on my lap and straddled it i had my hands on her waistband while hers were wrapped around my neck
he took the first picture in this position without us kissing but our foreheads were touching then the after those he made us kiss eachother
he had us standing up for the next one eva was standing up while he made me get on her back he told me to put my head on her shoulder while looking at the camera
after that he made me not look at the camera looking at eva instead but she still looked at the camera then once those were taken i got off her back
the next one he gave us a black and grey blanket to wrap around us while we were sitting again and eva was between my legs resting on me we took one picture of us looking at the camera
after that we took one with me sitting down and eva standing while bending down to kiss my head i had my eyes closed then smiled at the camera
we took a bit more then we asked the guy to see them so we can get sent a few for our instagram and socials we picked our favorites
we talked for a bit then we decided to head out since it's 5:15 now photo shoots take so long i swear
we got in the car i made sure to open the passenger door for eva and close is once she's in
i walked over to my side of the car got in and started it
we started to drive then after awhile i felt something off like bad vibes in the car so i look over to see eva like like paper white i was so shocked and scared
so i quickly pulled the car over "eva if you need to throw up go to it" i said calmly as possible
she looked at me nervously then quickly opened the door and just got all her guts out
i leaned over the console and held her hair even if i was utterly disgusted by throw which i am but i'm here for eva no matter what is going on
we stayed there for a minute or two after she was done to make sure she doesn't need to do it anymore
"i think i'm ok now anna" eva said sitting up then looking at me with the softest and sickliest eyes
"are you one hundred percent sure bub" i said while grabbing her hand she nodded back
i took the car out of park then headed back to the house which isn't super far away now
we made it home so i parked got out then went to evas side of the car to open the door for her
"ma lady" i said moving out of the doorway for eva to get out while holding my hand that i placed out for her to grab
"thanks bubba" she said smiling
i want to kiss her so bad but she just threw up so i'm gonna have to wait sadly
eva grabbed my keys to unlock the house then she unlocked the house and went in she set the keys down on the counter
eva went upstairs while i stayed down here to make some chicken noodle soup for her since she's thrown up today
honestly i don't know what she's doing up there but i just hope she's ok
i put some stuff away to make the place cleaner while she soup was warming up
she soup finally got done so i grabbed it then put it on a tray with a spoon and some ice just in case she wants to put some ice in it to cool it down some
i walked upstairs carefully to make sure not to spill the soup i got upstairs
i went to our door knocked quietly so she'll know i'm coming in then opened the door to see her not in here
i placed the soup down on the night stand i kinda started to panic but she's probably just in the bathroom
'anna calm down' i thought to myself
i went over to the bathroom quickly seeing eva laying on the floor unconscious with a blade, pills, and alcohol bottle all near her
i started panicking a lot i checked her pulse quickly on her neck it was so faint but it's there
"eva bub why why just stay with me i got you" i said with a shaky voice
i pulled my phone out then dialed 911 to get someone to help her
"this is 911 what's your emergency" the dispatch said to me
"hi um my girlfriend i think just tried to kill her self her pulse is very faint but it's there and i can tell she's having a hard time breathing so can you please help me please" i said in the verge of tears
"yes i can help you in tracking our call right now so i can get people there to help her but what is her name and your name mam" dispatch said trying to stay calm
"her name is eva shu-cudmore eva cudmore and m-my name is anna shumate" i said freaking out
"ok mam thank you but you need to take deep breathing people are very close right now just stay on the line until they get here for me is that ok" she said
"yes that's ok" i said taking big deep breaths
i hear my front door open so i screamed "i'm upstairs in the bathroom in the bedroom"
i hung up on the dispatch then i hear the door burst open they run to where i'm at with eva
they grabbed her from my arms and i let them
"can i come with you guys in the ambulance please" i said to the paramedics
"who are you to this woman" one asked me
"i'm her wife" i said making sure they'll let me come with her and that was the first thing that came to my head
"yes mam you can come but i need her name" another said trying to stay calm
"her name is eva shumate sir" i said to the man
"ok thank you now come with us" they said
i followed them to the rig they drove here
they put eva in and then grabbed my hand to help me in because i'm panicking so much
i sat down with eva next to me holding her hand while they were keeping her alive and hooking things up to her
"do you think she's gonna be ok" i said looking up from eva
"normally attempted suicide if it's caught early enough they make it and it looks like here you caught her early enough so she's most than likely be fine hun" one person said to me
i just have been so relieved
"yes i was only gone for like 20 minutes so she's was only alone in that period of time" i said started to calm down a bit
they nodded at me while we finally pulled up to the hospital they pulled eva out and then they helped me out
"do you need checked up at all mam" a woman asked me while seeing eva there
"i don't think so but maybe because my heart won't stop racing" i said back
"ok well get you checked up a bit then what is your name" the lady asked me
"oh uhh yea my name is anna shumate" i said back
"ok anna we'll take you right this way" the woman said
"um first can i know where they're taking that girl that was in the ambulance with me because that's my wife i want to know if she's ok first" i said while i stopped walking
"they're bringing her to the trauma room to make sure she's ok then they'll admit her to the hospital" she said looking at me while rubbing my arm
i nodded and started following the lady again
we made it to the room where i'm going to get checked out the doctor basically instantly came in after i sat down
"so i'm here to make sure you're doing alright after what exactly mam" the doctor said
"umm well i found my wife in the bathroom after attempting killing herself and i started to panic really bad so i want to make sure im ok and my heart is ok" i said back
"ok mam the lady you were with said your name is anna is that correct" the doctor said
"yes that is correct" i said
"oh and also i never got your name doc also if you don't mind me asking what are your pronouns just in case" i said
"ohh well im name is dr. bailey and my pronouns are they/she also thank you for asking no one ever asks they just think im a woman" dr. bailey said smiling
"you're welcome welcome doc i just want to make sure im not misgendering you because that would be disrespectful of me since im lgbtq" i said back to them
"ok well we probably should just check you up now ima check your blood pressure and i know it's going to be a bit high" they said to me
"yes i was going to mention that if you didn't" i said while a chuckled a bit
—
after about 30 minutes of checking me up i was good to go everything is alright so i was brought to the waiting room to wait for them to call me for eva to see her
after like a minute i thought i should tell her parents that she's in the hospital so i grabbed my phone and called her mom
"hello anna" grace said to me which is evas mom
"hey mom um i was calling to tell you that eva is in the hospital for trying to off herself also have eva ever tried to off herself or hurt herself before because i want to make sure she doesn't need like medicine of something" i said to evas mom
"ok thank you for telling me and when she was like 13 or 14 she cut herself and she always told me everything and nothing more happened than cutting herself also has anything happened since i left la because she's happy.."
"..with you so i don't know what would have made her want to kill herself" grace asked me
"i mean the only thing that happened kinda is she's been throwing up after most of her meals but i just thought she maybe developed an eating disorder so i've been trying to help her with that so i honestly don't know grace" i said confused and hurt
"ok thank you for taking care of her darling and remember i'm always always here for you and eva so if you ever need someone to talk to other than eva and your family i'm always here i love you anna" evas mom said to me
"i love you too grace and thank you i'll remember that in the future bye" i said hanging up the phone
after about five or so minutes of waiting for someone to update me on eva i heard my name get called
"anna shumate" someone said
i got up walked over it was the same doctor i had earlier dr. bailey
"is she ok" i said worried
"she's doing better and she's not awake yet but she's stable for you to see her" they said to me
i nodded and i followed her to evas room
we got up to evas room i saw her there hooked up to so many machines
i walked over to her and grabbed her hand then grabbed a chair to sit next to her
"we flushed out most of the pills and alcohol in her system there's a bit left but that shouldn't hurt her we just didn't want to flush out the good things in her body while trying to flush out all the bad stuff and she should wake up anything time" dr bailey said to me
i nodded back to them then they left the room
i put my head on the bed while still holding evas hand "i'm here bubba youre safe with me i love you please wake up"
i laid there in silence for awhile then i felt a squeezed on my hand my head shot up so quickly
i saw evas head move facing at me a bit "bub" eva said
"hey honey i'm here you're ok" i said standing up putting my hand on her cheek rubbing it softly
she opened her eyes she looked so sick still "come here and sit with me" she said
"i don't want to hurt you though" i said softly
"youre not going to if i'm hurting i'll tell you crazy" she said trying to make me smile
i helped her scoot over then i sat down next to her she put her head on my shoulder
"eva why did you do that" i asked her
"i'm just scared youre gonna leave me because i'm throwing up everything and i have little energy and youre always full of energy and want to go places" she said quietly
"eva i'm not going to leave you ever i choose you over everyone possible in this world" i said while kissing her head
"so you won't leave me got it" she laughed a tiny bit after saying that
"i hate to say this bub but i think you should maybe get some help like go to the mental hospital once youre healed because i think it will help as much as i hate leaving you alone with people i don't know" i said trying to keep calm
"yea maybe i should how long do you think i'll be there" she asked
"well those places take as long as you need to get better but i know youre a hard worker so maybe like a week or so" i say to her she nodded while the doctor came in
"eva you're free to go home but please take it easy and try your best to stay alive also i'm calling the la mental institution to see if you could stay there for a bit to get better" the doc said
"if you weren't going to call them anna and i were going to get me one too haha" eva said
"ok well good" the doctor said back
then they left the room
i saw a bag of evas clothes luckily they were comfy clothes for her
i got up and made eva sit up then i shut the curtain thing in the room in case someone came in while i was helping eva change
i grabbed the clothes then helped her with everything to get her in her clothes and the doctor took the iv out when she came in
evas all dressed now and we went to the desk person to sign discharge papers for eva
we signed them and left
"eva should we drop you off now or later" i asked while we walked out
"i think now so i can get out of there faster but can i call my mom first on your phone" she said
i nodded and gave her my phone
she talked to her mom for a bit then they hung up
we got in the car and went to the mental hospital
i placed my hand on her thigh and moved my thumb in circles to make sure she's ok with this and to keep her calm
we pull up to the place and i got out then opened the door for eva
"youre gonna be ok and better once youre out of here you'll be a whole new happy eva but you'll still be my eva i promise" i said before we started walking
"i know bub and i love you thank you for making sure i'm ok but i think i'm ready to get better so come on" she said grabbed my hand while starting to walk in
we walk in to the place and i got to the person at the desk with evas hand still in mine with her next to me
"hi um i'm here to bring my girlfriend here for a while because she needs to get better and this is the best place to do that" i said nicely and politely to the person
"ok mam can i get a name date of birth and can i see your girlfriend" the perosn asked
"here she is and her name is eva cudmore her birthday is february 26, 2003" i said back while holding eva tightly
"ok thank you and you can wait over so we can get someone to help you guys" they said nicely
eva is looking nervous now but we walked over to the waiting room i guess and sat down
"youre gonna be alright if they don't treat you good you figure a way out and call my number since you have it memorized i'll pick up any random call until youre home safe with me" i said hugging her
"thank you bub and i'm just a little scared to be without you here since we haven't really left each other's side since we moved in together" eva said back
i hugged her again until i heard her name so we stood up and following the lady back
"ok eva we're going to have to take all elastic things stings and anything you can harm yourself with and you'll get your belongings back when you leave and here's a thing of clothes you'll have to wear and i know they aren't the best things to wear but it's what keeps you safe" the lady said handing eva the the clothes and a bag to put her stuff in
the lady also showed us the bathroom to go get eva changed
we go in and take everything off eva besides her underwear because it's her underwear
she gets all changed i put everything in her bag i set the bag down and pull her into a long hug "i love you eva don't forget that"
"i love you too anna i'm glad i have you" she said back
we hugged for a bit longer than i pull back
"it only be for a bit bub" eva said reassuring me i nodded then we walk out and see the lady waiting for us
"ok since youre all changed your guest is gonna have to go now so we can start your treatment on getting you better i'm sorry that you have to leave but eva will be out sooner than later" she said very nicely
"thank you for helping eva and i'll be back eva i promise and i love you so much" i said hugging her again and kissing her passionately on the lips then i pull back
"i'm gonna miss you anna i love you more and i promise i'll get better soon bye bubba" eva said walking away with the lady
i have her bag of clothes and stuff i walk out of the place then go to my car i get in then i sit there for a bit just thinking
i don't want to cry until i get home so i can drive safely so eva has someone to go home to
i started the car and went off back to the house
i finally pull in the drive way from the most horrid and silent car ride ever
i get out of the car lock the car then unlock the door i get in throw the keys on the kitchen counter
i go upstairs seeing evas soup i made her before i found her yk
i bring that downstairs to the kitchen the go back upstairs
i grabbed her favorite set of clothes and change into them and grab jerry then plopped on the bed
i hugged jerry tightly while smelling evas amazing scent on her clothes then i just cry and cry
—
i've been crying for what felt like years but it's literally only been two hours without eva
i grabbed my phone and watched our funny moments together
i felt my eyes get heavy then i put my phone down on the bed with dnd on but only i can get called just in case of eva calling
then i shut my eyes and went into a deep sleep