Savon
Chris and I made great progress last night on the album. Without any distractions or weird ass energy, it's clear he can be really productive. Don't know for how long I can maintain that kind of focus for him, but I'll kick out whoever I need to in order to make this album an success.
Together, we spent all night in the studio. We didn't leave until 3 in the morning. He felt guilty for breaking his promise to his daughter. Not even he could deny though the magic that was taking place. Still, I know we have more work to do.
When I returned home, I stepped backed into a quiet house. My best writing comes to me in the real early morning hours. Rearming the security alarm, I placed on my AirPods and went work just free flowing from the heart. Nothing but good ol' pen and paper. My notebook probably had a good two albums worth of songs for myself written down waiting to be released, but I never recorded a single one. With Chris at the center of my creativity, all the words that came to mind was for a guy perspective.
I wrote so much that I tired my ass out. When I woke up, I damn near jumped out of bed when my hand fell by my waist side feeling the vibration of my phone ringing. The sun was up and birds had already began to chirp when I finally got myself together.
Three missed calls from Chris appeared on my screen. Shit, I thought to myself as I gave him a callback.
"What hell, I been calling you all morning!" Chris sounded real aggravated.
"I'm real sorry," my hand rested for a moment on my forehead. I was truly embarrassed.
"No excuses, bring that big ass on."
"I'm going to be delayed, I have to wire Felish's lawyer money as a retainer so I can get this motioned to obtain the rights to — you know what. Don't worry about it, I'm on my way."
"Nah, you have a lot going on it's cool."
"Chris, I'm fine. After we left the studio I just wanted to keep it going, I had inspiration and I wrote a couple lyrics for you. No whole songs or anything, but I'm just staying prepared."
"Nah, you good. Wasn't you who said to me respect my time? I been here, ready, and waiting for you."
"I apologize, I can be there in twenty minutes!"
"Twenty minutes in LA traffic?" Chris scoffed. "I told you that you needed to take time to deal with the loss in your personal life. So now, I'm making you get it together. You have a good one!" Chris disconnected the phone.
"Fuck!" I shouted.
My heart was racing, I think I just got fired. Part of me thinks it's just that aged old reverse psychology mental mind fuck. I have seen my father, as he would call it, turn the heat up on his artist to get them to understand whatever he needed done from them. Pushing them to be their absolute best without them realizing what he was doing.
Honestly, I think it's a brilliant method and a lot of sad ass artist need that today. But I'm not one of those! I made a mistake, I should have been on time today.
After I tried to understand the move Chris was pulling, I was able to calm down. When he disconnected the call, I didn't send a single text or call him back. I let it be.
"Ms. Daily, I do apologize for the sudden change of events. This sort of thing can always be tricky." The lawyer, Mona met me with me.
"It's no surprise when people want to put a price tag on someone's blood, sweat, and tears." I stated taking my seat in her office.
"Unfortunately you're right. Let me remind you the process isn't going to be quick and easy. You're aunts publishings is up for half a million dollars. You and I both know if it ends up in the wrong persons hands, your family's legacy will become watered down. Commercials, unapproved samples, and white washed creativity using the songs as they please. They are on the market currently for half a million dollars and expected to rise with potential bidders."
"Are you fucking serious?" I shouted. "Excuse my language," I address the fact of respecting my elders. "But damn, that's crazy."
"You have inherited the funds to fight this if you would like, I'm not an accountant or anything but I wouldn't worry too much about the financial aspect."
"But I'm sure this can potentially drain me if I try to press the matter. The last thing I want is to hear my family's work in a damn Christmas Target commercial where it's barely diverse in the actors they include or some damn Honda commercial. I can't just let this go."
"The decision is ultimately yours, I suggest you get to me by tomorrow morning before it's too late."
"Thank you Mona, I'll call you!"
Chris
"Diamond, I don't have time for the bullshit and I'm tired of going back and forth with you. I don't want animosity between us. For your level of stress you shouldn't want that either. When this baby is born I'm going to be there, as long as it's mine! Ain't nobody trying to come at you with any tricks or games, I respect if you can return that same courtesy. I want to talk about how we going to handle this if the baby is mine. No arguing, no yelling, none of that. Hit me back."
Since Savon had trouble getting up this morning, I still managed to get some work done in the studio. I clocked out early to make up for lost time yesterday with my kids. I have yet to hear from Diamond. I would have thought that she would have called me back by now.
As we figure out the paternity of this baby, I want to cleanup this spiral of a relationship. Diamond and I were separated when she told me she was pregnant. Aside from our hookup, I know she was fucking another nigga right after me. Ain't no way she can deny it. I have receipts to prove the shit. I just haven't sprung it on her yet.
2022 I'm on some different type of energy. Guess that comes with age. Social media won't ever get those candid videos from me anymore. When I was honest for the whole world to see it backfired in a major way. I don't regret it, but I promise nobody getting that shit from me again.
Knock knock
"Chris, what are you doing here?" Savon opened the door.
Allowing myself in, I went straight to the couch. "Get ready to go, we going out tonight."
"I'm confused, what's going on?" She closed the door behind her.
"Helping you out, we going to a party tonight so wear all white."
"Didn't you fire me?"
I looked over at her like she was crazy, "what? Hell no! I ain't heartless. You need to let your hair down, take a break. You running after me and my business when in reality, you need to just relax. Take it from someone who been through some shit. Whether you keep busy or don't do shit at all, the result is all the same. Might as well have some fun while this healing process does it's thing."
"Actually I have been having fun. All I know is music, I made a mistake overworking. You know I pride myself on professionalism, it won't happen again." Savon apologized as she sat beside me on the couch.
"Don't worry about it. How is the case going?"
Savon sighed as she rested her head back on the couch, she tucked her leg under the other hiding her manicured toes. She sat in some light purple fuzzy shorts, with the cropped jacket to match. Her plump thighs expanded on the seat cushion and seemingly glistened as if she adorn herself with a bit of body perfume glitter.
"My lawyer warned me that it will get expensive. I'm not going to stress out about it, I want her music to stay within the family. I know it's what they both would have wanted, so I'm not going down without a fight."
"You'll get the publishing back, don't even trip."
"I know, I just wish it didn't have to happen this way. It never fails, it's always drama around pregnancies, weddings, and death."
I cleared my throat a bit, "got that right. People just miserable or want to take advantage of you in vulnerable times. But I don't want you thinking about that right now, I know you got to shower, put back on your face, and everything else."
"I'm sorry, but I don't do Hollyweird ass parties. I'm not trying to get caught up in that type of scene."
"Tonight you do, I ain't going to let anything happen to you. Shit don't always go down like how people think, it get crazy. But you ain't going to be bothered, I'll make sure of it personally. Besides, you know everybody in the industry anyway."
"What the hell does that have to do with anything? It's niggas I've known my whole life who tried me. Knowing somebody don't mean shit when they think they have leverage over you."
"Either somebody twisted your damn reality scaring you away from the industry or you don't realize how you look. Have you seen yourself? You are gorgeous, any nigga that don't try you is gay."
I laughed, "no need to be dramatic."
"I'm for real. It's dog ass niggas no matter where you go or what you into. It's not one female I know that hasn't been stepped to over some pussy in this business. You just have to look past that and keep commanding your respect, which you know you good at. You got something they want, they got something you want. Simple as that."
"What do you want from me?" Savon turned her body closer to face me.
"Huh?"
"Huh? You heard what the hell I said!" She smiled. "What do you want from me? I don't want it to be any games between us. I want you to know my intentions, but first I want to know yours."
"I feel like I'm being set up," A smile rose as I sat up a bit.
"No, we just having a real moment. You can be honest, it ain't no judgment. I heard enough slick remarks from you already, don't get shy on me now."
"I want you to help me create something I haven't had before. I want to help you succeed, I listen to you talk and pick up on a lot of things. I want to help you win. I know you about to tell me no, know that the help is here. No strings attached."
"I'm not here to rise off your name. Until I feel in my spirit that I'm ready, I'm fine with being behind the scene. My niche is in being a songwriter. Right now, this doesn't feel like my time. I told you, I want to carry on for Felish and I want to see this project through."
"What does that mean for us when this album is released?" I asked.
"You tell me, you the boss!" She smiled, "if this is working for you then let's keep it going. I didn't think I would like working for you, it hasn't been bad so far."
"You make it sound like I'm such a horrible ass guy. What did I do to you?"
"Nothing personally," she smiled. "Social media has a bad habit of causing people to judge you. To be honest, my thoughts aren't too wrong. You're a nice guy, mind you we haven't known each other long so I'm sure I haven't seen your true colors yet. I didn't want to be involved with your ego or your personal issues. I haven't seen all of you yet, but we'll cross that bridge. I'll be honest too, you kind of hurt my heart."
"How?" I got comfortable and sat back to hear her truth.
"It's really silly, but I know I'm not the only person in the world who thinks it. I completely understand that it's your preference, that's why it's silly. But I could probably count on one hand the number of brown or chocolate girls in your music videos. I haven't even seen you kiss them."
"I give everybody a chance."
"Tuh," she sucked her teeth. "You have a strict type and haven't strayed since! You only dated one black girl your whole career, two if you count your second public relationship. Yet, even Karrueche falls right into that type you like. Since then, it's like you — never mind."
"It's like, I what?"
"No, I said enough, it's getting personal. I'm not trying to be disrespectful, it's not my business anyway. My recommendation, it's good to be diverse, but show some love to the very people that have rode hard as fuck for you through all your shit. You feel me?"
I let out a laugh, "I'll definitely work on that. You know, you sure switched up your tune since you thought you were fired today."
Savon lightly tapped my shoulder as she let out a laugh. "I'm still going to be hard on you when I need to be. But I thank you for understanding the slip up."
"It's all good, you going to get ready or what? We ain't got that much time, I never like arriving to a party too late."
"Fine, let me go take another damn shower."
Savon made her way upstairs leaving me alone on the couch. I had been contemplating somethings. Little did she know, but she definitely called me out on a few things that were hitting home. I actually like Savon, but she isn't what I'm into. I'm confused how I should handle this thing we have going on.
Twenty minutes had went by, I already heard the shower end five minutes ago. Curious to see how much longer she would be, I went upstairs. The door was open, respectfully before entering I knocked.
"It's cool, you can come in, I'm decent." Savon dug through her closet dressed in a t-shirt and biker shorts.
Her back was facing me, as she tried to find something I lounged back on her bed.
"When did you move in with Felish?"
"Wasn't that long ago, two years ago maybe. What do you think?" Savon turned around to show me her dress. Her face became twisted once she noticed how I was laid out on her bed. "I know you aren't laying on my clean sheets with your street clothes on."
"I'm on the blanket comforter and my clothes not dirty."
"I don't give a damn!" She laughed.
"You'll be alright!"
"Anyways, what you think? Too hoochie mama?"
"It's cute, I don't want to tell you what you should wear. But if it was me, I wouldn't. Keep in mind that type of look an outfit like that can give off. It's giving Instagram model."
Savon laughed, "niggas really out here saying it's giving. I ain't mad at you."
"Fuck outta here, first of all people been saying that. It used to be its giving me, they just dropped the me. Y'all females feminized it."
"Do you boo, no judgement here." She snickered.
"Can you hurry up please?"
"I think I found the perfect fit. I'm just going to do a quick natural beat and we can go." Savon took her dress to the bathroom then sat at the vanity.
"This about to take an hour," I sighed as I laid all the way back.
"No it won't, I promise."
Waiting on her I stretched out and hit my hand on her notebook, while she was focused on her face I opened it and discovered it was her songbook. Ten minutes had went by and she didn't notice I went through it yet. I closed it before she caught me.
"What's the plans after this?"
"Shit ... what plans you got in mind?"
"Hold on, I phrased that wrong. Are we getting together tomorrow? I just want to make sure we still on to work."
"Yeah, but I want to change the time. We'll make it afternoon instead, it help both us out. Especially, depending on how the night goes."
"Well I'm ready, let me just change real quick." Savon dipped into the bathroom then came out with a diamond cuban link chain. "Can you put this on please? I don't feel like fighting with these long nails."
Savon handed over her chain, I stood behind her catching a whiff of the body perfume she had on. Her hair was styled in a low bun so it wasn't in the way. I caught a glimpse that she was watching me through her vanity mirror. Right before I clasped on the hook I looked at her back stealing a few seconds.
"Done." I commented.
"Thank you," she smiled. "It better not be no weird shit tonight, I swear."
"Stop tripping, you in good hands. Let's go," I let her lead the way out.
Savon
Whew, I don't know why but I'm really nervous to go to this party with Chris. My gut is telling not to go, but I don't want to be sheltered all the time. Whatever my direction is with music is going to lead me to having to network. Time to come out of my shell.
When Chris and I pulled up to the mansion party the driveway alone already was packed of attendees. It wasn't that far away from the door at least where he parked. Outside of my passenger door, Chris helped me out of the car.
"Ready?" He questioned looking me in my eyes.
"Yeah, I'm good."
Hell, I lied but I ain't want to seem weak. Surprisingly when we walked off, Chris took me by the hand. I was slightly confused, but I just brushed it off as him wanting to help me since I was walking on cobble stone in heels.
All A List actors and musicians were there. Legends were in the house, I was grateful to meet those that I haven't been introduced to before. The DJ had the music just right, the drinks were flowing too.
I had a really good time an hour into the party, until Chris and I went outside. He made me feel comfortable sticking beside me. I felt like him and I could share the same space without people thinking we were a new thing. They were so into themselves, ain't nobody was worried about him and I together.
Chris being his natural born self, started talking and dancing amongst the crowd he was around. One of the hired crew for the party bought out a tray of lines and had the nerve to place the tray in front of me on the little table. Immediately I got up, wanting no parts I stood away.
Someone else took my seat and went to town. I didn't even want to continue to look in that direction. My whole mood was off after that. I'm a little surprised, but that ain't none of my business, and I definitely kept minding it.
Chris must have realized that I looked a little distressed, he came over with a smile on his face to check on me.
"Something wrong?"
"I'm fine."
"I'm sorry, I said I would stick with you."
"I'm fine, you don't need to be on me like that. I'm not asking you to be on my ass."
"That's something I don't mind getting behind."
In a different setting, I probably would have laughed now being used to his comments. But I wasn't in the mood, I wasn't feeling a good energy being here. I couldn't shake the feeling that I was being setup or something. But I didn't want him to leave early because of me.
"What I can't get behind, is that!" I pointed out discreetly in a calm manner. "People just that comfortable that the snort coke in the open?"
"This shit been like this in the industry long before you or I were even born or thought of back in the 70s. What, you want me to change it or something? This is beyond me or you. Ignore it, that's what I do."
"Don't worry, I am. I'll be back, I'm going to head to the restroom."
Leaving him outside I asked someone in the kitchen if they knew the way to go. Down the hall to the left they told me. It was down a long hallway, it was easy to get distracted by the decor and paintings on the wall.
With my damn luck it was three doors on the right. Ahead of me was a producer and some Instagram chick heading into one door, obviously that wasn't the one. Entering in the second I ended up in a bedroom, there was handcuffs on the floor
that met my heel. In front of me was a white curtain, I didn't want to get mixed up in whatever shit was on the other side. I didn't hear anybody, but I ain't want to find out what was on the other side.
Immediately leaving, I went in the other door where the bathroom was finally. Taking in a deep breath I collected myself. This crowd ain't for the sensitive, I needed to get though tonight. I can handle myself in these surroundings.
On my way out the bathroom I heard an unsettling noise coming from the room the Instagram chick walked in. Everything in me wanted to open the door, my crazy ass did exactly that! Slowly, I opened the door and saw shorty still dressed with a second niggas in the room.
Lord, if this is some Ebony at Junior birthday party type shit, just say that! I thought to myself, I didn't know if I should do something. Before I made the decision the door closed in front of me, I took that as a sign to leave it alone. I kept my ear to the door for an extra five minutes for reassurance. Sis wasn't screaming or in distress, yet I didn't see a proud look on her face before the door had closed. Once I felt comfortable to walk away I did, I just prayed it was all consensual.
"You got lost or something?"Chris asked.
"No, just took my time coming back."
"Here, I got you a drink." Chris offered.
"Thanks," I accepted the glass. I was already drinking to begin with so I wasn't concerned.
Chris led me away from the scene and we talked alone.
"I didn't think you would come with me tonight. It's good to see you smiling and having a little fun."
"Only reason why I'm smiling now is because I'm comfortable with you. But this," I waved my hand to gesture the party, isn't my scene. This shit is going to take getting used to, I don't know if I fit in this world."
"You standing on a legacy that built this world, you fit in by default. You just need to make it your own."
"You don't understand, you got this shit out the mud. You had your mother there for you, every step of the way. I'm in this alone, I'm terrified of failing. I swear, it's my biggest fear. The shit I just seen on my way to the bathroom, I'm scared of that too. I don't want anybody in power of my career."
"What did you see on the way to the bathroom?" He asked confused.
"What the hell is going on behind that white curtain? You told me it would be no crazy shit here." I asked.
"I ain't ever been on the other side of it and never asked. You dealing with people who got hella money to do whatever they want with it. Kinky shit for sure is bound to go down."
"I'm sorry if I'm bringing you down, if it changes anything, I was having fun."
"You ain't bringing me down at all, the night still ain't over."
Chris left to get us another drink. When I stepped away I rejoined the crowd, some people were all liquored up that they didn't mind getting in the pool. I caught somebody staring me down, they didn't care I saw.
He was chocolate, with a bald head, and some damn dark glasses on at night. He stood about 5ft 8in, with his drink in his hands he wouldn't take his eyes off me. As Chris was approaching, the man took off his shades and almost choked on my drink.
When Chris appeared, I walked us back to where we were in the yard by ourselves. When he handed me the drink, I damn near finished it in seconds.
"Yo, are you good? Am I doing something to you? Is it the people, what's wrong?"
"No I just —,"
"Chris, what's my guy!" My old producer came over to speak. Chris greeted him with a smile.
I didn't want to embarrass Chris or start some drama so I kept it cordial. "Savon, right? You remember me don't you?"
"Vinyl, how could I forget?" I answered.
"I haven't seen you in a long time, give me a hug!" He went straight for it and clutched me a little tight.
"How far back do y'all go?" Chris asked, I sensed he read into that rug completely wrong.
"Oh we real acquainted, Savon is a musical genius we used to work together." Vinyl answered.
"Is that right?" Chris asked.
"Is it okay if I have a word with you?" Vinyls asked me.
"Anything you can say in front of me, you can say in front of Chris."
"Nah," Chris declined. "It's cool, if you need me I'll be right here."
Inside I became so damn furious that he didn't catch the hint I wanted him to stay. Vinyl ushered me off further to the side to say whatever he needed.
"You look good, how you been?" Vinyl took a sip of his drink.
"I've been great," I responded causally while keeping it short.
"You still sing?"
"Nah, not as of lately. The last time I tried to share my gift, it didn't go that well."
"That's your fault, we had chemistry and you decided to throw it away. You could've blown up, but I see you trying to get out the gutta behind another successful man coat tails."
"Another successful man? I'm on somebody coat tails? The audacity is real right now. When was your last hit off another artist? Do me a favor, hold the disrespect, and get the fuck out my face."
"Hold up, you still owe me. I have everything you recorded, it can be yours again. But you know what you have to do!"
Everything happened so fast, this man grabbed me by my neck and had his hand up my dress trying to rub on my pussy. When I cut my eyes over to where Chris was standing beforehand, I seen he wasn't there.
I swatted his hand away from my dress, but he still had a hold on my neck. "You think you a big man for this, I bet you have the littlest dick out of everyone here."
I thought my words caused him to let go of, but he did the unexpected."Ain't nobody ever tell me my shit was little." Vinyl exposed his left hook
"The next time you decide to fuck with me, I promise I got something for you and it won't be what you want." I said taking the chance to walk away.
As I left Chris had began to walk towards me, but I brushed right past him. "Savon, where you going?" Chris shouted, but I ignored him. "Aye man what you say to her?" I heard him shout to Vinyl, but by that time I already made my way to the kitchen to get to the front entrance.
I know shit comes with the territory, but I didn't think I would be a victim twice over.
"Savon, wait! Why are you leaving?"
"I told you that this shit wasn't for me, I didn't want to come to these weird ass parties. You said I was in good hands and not to worry about shit. I'm getting the fuck out of here, I tried to stay for you. But fuck you!"
"What the hell did I do to you?" Chris shouted. I ignored him while I tried to order an Uber but he snatched my phone away.
Initially I responded as composed as I could be, but I ended up yelling as I got my last word out. "Stop playing with me, please!"
"You don't need an Uber. I'm sorry for whatever happened, I step away real quick. I thought you and dude had history or some shit."
"Chris, I didn't want to talk to him! The only history we had is the nigga holding my old songs over me for sex! I'm not slutting myself out for some songs. I wanted to curse his ass out, but I didn't want to embarrass you. I should've the moment I felt uncomfortable."
"Yet, here the fuck I been all night asking are you good." Chris continued to shout, "you ain't once tell me you wanted to leave. Whether you want to go into details or not, I'm about to bust the nigga head." Chris paced fast as hell up the driveway to find Vinyl.
"Nooo!" I ran after him, there was some difficulty catching up since I was driveway was cobbled. Before he walked in the door I caught up to him, "please don't do this!"
"I don't give a fuck, you came here with me. That shit ain't going to sit right knowing something happened to you when you were my guest." Chris tried to get past me but I wouldn't let him, he was firm on his words.
"This isn't your fight, I don't want you to get in trouble. That nigga needs the money I'm sure! Please, I'll get in the car with you. His ass will get his, just not tonight!"
Chris' jaw was clenched tight, he looked at me for a minute before turning around to leave the party. He handed me back my phone once we got in the car. Music replaced the conversation. Arriving at my house, Chris kept his car running as he was dropping me off.
"I want apologize for taking my anger out on you. I was wrong. You tried to help me by showing me a good time, without all that extra bullshit tonight, I really enjoyed myself with you. My mind wanted to believe that Vinyl approached me to make amends. But he grabbed me by my neck and put his hand up my dress. When I said something to him, he let me go but ended up exposing himself to me. After that moment I saw red, again I'm sorry."
Chris turned off his car, then sighed. "Why didn't you let me break that nigga nose?"
"I'm not worth you going at him for me. One day I'm going to get this weight off my shoulders, now isn't the time."
"Let me decide next time what is or isn't worth it. I'm sorry that shit happened. How do you feel?"
"Low, really low. With a touch of violated, certainly disrespected. Nothing extreme happened which I'm thankful for, my thighs are thick so he didn't feel on much of anything." I cackled to mask the feelings with humor.
"Since you would let me handle him, the least I can do is see you inside."
"I don't have a problem with that."
Chris and I went inside the house, he remained downstairs while I went up to take a shower. When I joined him I was appropriately dressed. His arm rested on the couch cushion, but found its way on my shoulder. We talked for a couple of hours and laughed, having a really good time till my phone began to ring, I ignored it.
"Your man calling you, do I need to be quiet?"
"I told you I don't have one, it's only my friend Zara. You sure concern about who I'm with, who you with. You still on some toxic shit?"
"I am 32, all that toxic boy shit is long gone. Ain't nobody on me like that, if I did you think I'd be here with you."
"Umm, you asked to come inside so you tell me!" I laughed a bit. You was on some tough guy shit tonight, that was cute, I'll admit it."
Chris turned closer to me while still resting back on the couch, "I got your back."
"I got you too!"
"Promise on it," he held out his pinky.
I laughed, "really? Fine," I hooked my pinky onto his.
"We should kiss on it!" He suggested.
"Are you serious, how old are you again?" I questioned with a smile.
"We can make it simple," he kissed his own pinky that was still hooked to mine.
I rolled my eyes, but leaned in to go along with him. Close to each other my lips perched onto my pinky.
"See," he said not moving an inch.
Softly I replied, "yeah, I do."
Still hooked on my pinky, Chris used his other hand to cup my jaw. He brought me close enough to for our lips to connect, it was my mistake to get on top of him.