HI BEST FRIENDS
THANK YOU SO FUCKING MUCH FOR 13k READS ON THE STORY <333 I WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO THANK Y'ALL ENOUGH FOR EVERYTHING
i hope y'all like this one :D many of u have been very patient for this chapter so I LOVE U & I'LL TALK TO U IN THE COMMENTS
ENJOYOYOYO -katie <3
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b r i e l l e
Can he tell me something? What the hell is about to go down?
"Yeah, anything." I get up from my laying position in the sand and sit with bent knees across from JJ so I can look at him while he talks. He's obviously very nervous, and the longer he waits to speak the more nervous I become. "You don't have to say it if you don't want to," I remind him, hoping he doesn't feel like he has to do this.
"No, I do have to, Brielle. That's the thing." JJ looks at me now after avoiding eye contact for a bit. "I'm gonna regret it for fucking forever if I don't. I just don't know how to say it." I've never been more confused in my life.
I let out a nervous giggle and move a little closer to him, mostly just cause it's getting colder out. I sandwich one of his hands between both of mine, looking him in the eyes again. "You're pretty good at word vomiting, aren't you? Just channel that now!"
J laughs a little at my words and says a quiet 'yeah', easing a bit of the nervous tension between us. He sits up in the sand now and we're both at eye level with each other. The beach is totally deserted too, silent except for the soft sound of the waves behind us. The stars in the sky light up his face just enough so that I can see him look up at me with just his eyes, keeping his head down facing his lap. We smile when our eyes meet, and a swarm of butterflies rushes through my stomach. How much longer is he gonna wait?
I take his hand again shake it loosely in my own. "Come onnnn...!"
"Okay! Okay." JJ chuckles and takes another audibly deep breath and we maintain eye contact for a while longer. His jaw hangs open for a moment before he finally decides to speak. "I... really fuckin' like you, Brielle." Oh my god. Oh my god.
My face heats up immediately after hearing his words. Did I hear him correctly? That actually just happened? I find myself staring at the boy as my lips curl up into a huge smile, and he looks back with his own nervous grin. Once I finally process what he said, I bury my head in my knees to stifle the sound of my excited giggle.
As I replay the last ten seconds in my mind, I feel those goddamn butterflies explode in my body again. But this time, I don't hate the feeling. Usually I would distract myself in an attempt to will them away, avoiding the fact that I too have been head over fucking heels for this boy for months.
When I pick my head back up and look at JJ again, the two of us break into laughter once more. "Do you really?" I ask him genuinely in a quiet voice, finding it hard to believe that this is what's actually happening right now. JJ Maybank likes me? Like, likes me? After all that time that I was convinced he didn't?
"I mean, yeah. I do. A lot. " Oh my god. JJ looks away towards the water now, and I realize that there's something that I have to do too. I have to tell him.
Just as he did, I take a bit to collect my thoughts and figure out how to put them into real words. JJ likes me. 'A lot'. And I like him. Just as much, if not more. I know I have to tell him, and I really want to tell him, but what if this ruins our relationship? He's my best best best friend, and I would never ever want something to happen that screws us what we have going for ourselves. I mean, h-
"Do you, I mean, do you like... me...?" JJ shakes his head as he interrupts my thoughts. Goddammit. I was literally just about to talk. "Y'know? I mean, maybe I should have said something sooner, or not at all, but-" The speed at which he talks picks up rapidly as he begins to ramble.
"JJ."
"...too fucking scared that you wouldn't-"
"J?"
"...or that I- but I don't want you to feel-"
"JJ, stop it."
"...have to tell me, but I just thought that, y'know, we c-"
"Oh my god."
Before either of us know it, I've reached my arm out towards JJ and grabbed the collar of his tank top to pull him closer to me. The two of us stare at each other for half a second before I lean in and press my lips against his. With my hand still grasping his collar, my other finds its way to the back of his neck. I feel his hand fall into place on the side of my neck, exactly where it was last night. Oh my god. I'm kissing JJ Maybank right now.
As JJ gives in and kisses me back, I tug on his shirt to bring our bodies even closer than they were before, and my nose fills with the mixture of smoke and cologne that I've come to love. Our lips continue to move easily and gently together, the air around us filled with the quiet noise of our mouths parting before connecting again immediately after. My hand trails from the boy's neck to his bare bicep as I gently push us apart, my grip on his collar loosening as his touch falls from my neck.
I cannot believe that that just happened.
JJ and I stare silently at each other, both of us sporting nervously excited grins. I exhale loudly from my nose and the boy falls back on the sand behind him, letting out an adorable giggle as he covers his face with his hands.
"Did that answer your question?" I ask him, referring to his hesitant query about whether or not I like him back. I can barely see him now under the pitch black sky, but I think he nods as he replies with a high pitched 'yeah', and I don't have to see him to know that he's smiling to himself.
I reposition my body now, switching directions and laying on my back right next to JJ. We look up at the stars for a brief moment before I turn my head to look at him. He must have sensed my motion, cause he looks at me now too. "I like you too, JJ." I whisper to him quickly, responding to his previous question as if he didn't already know the answer. A smile tugs at his lips and it takes a lot out of me not to lean in and kiss him again.
The two of us return to stargazing, laying peacefully next to each other on the cold sand. "Did that actually just happen, or...?" JJ asks at a normal volume. "Like, we both just said that? For real?"
"I think so," I giggle at his many questions and silence falls over us once more, but only for a brief second. JJ cracks up again, and I'm able to make out an excited 'holy shit!' through his laughter.
"Who woulda thought that the JJ Maybank could have such a secret soft spot for someone?"
I spot the silhouette of JJ's middle finger in the darkness as the two of us sit up to face each other. "Ouch! I'm right here, y'know."
"What? It's a valid question."
"Okay, that one hurt, but now that I know you have one for me, I could care any fucking less about who knows."
"You mean you couldn't care?"
"Hm?"
"You couldn't care less. It's you couldn't." Would you stop being a grammar police right now, Bri? Not the time.
"Yeah, what you said." JJ says nonchalantly, leaning forward to plant another kiss on my lips. This time it's short and sweet, but I can tell that this is a feeling that I'm never ever getting bored of. Ever.
"Even John B, though?" I continue our conversation from before, bunching my hands up in the sleeves of JJ's yellow sweatshirt that I'm wearing and blowing hot air on them to keep myself warm. "He's been rooting for us since the beginning, y'know. We are never gonna hear the end of it once he finds out that this happened." I kind of want to tell the whole entire world that it happened, but keeping it a secret is probably for the best for now.
JJ takes another deep breath, laughing on the exhale. "Maybe they don't have to know just yet. Any of 'em." Glad we're on the same page, Blondie!
Neither of us talk for a few minutes, both of us basking in the fuzzy and exciting feeling that comes with the thought of the last ten minutes. I can't get over how like, low maintenance and carefree this whole thing is. Normally it would be some huge freak out when two people admit to liking each other, but all that really happened between JJ and I was us finally voicing something that we've both been aware of for months. The whole kissing thing will absolutely be worth a mini freak out, though. But not until I'm by myself.
When the cold air gets to be too much for me to handle, I take it upon myself to suggest another place to go to. "Should we go see him? John B? I feel bad that he doesn't feel good."
"It's pretty late, d'ya think he's still up?" JJ stands up now, reaching a hand out for me to grab as I jump up to my feet. The boy grabs his bag and slings it onto his back as we begin to walk slowly away from the shore.
"Even if he's not, he won't mind if we crash there." I yawn, finally aware of my tiredness after being distracted by the fact that JJ Maybank just told me he likes me. "I miss the Chateau. Haven't been there in a few days." We silently agree to spend the night at John B's, and continue our walk there. It's slightly longer than the walk from the beach to my house, but neither of us mind.
"So, does this mean we can like... kiss now? Whenever we want?" JJ asks in a funny voice. Peering up at him, I'm met with his trademark smirk that causes one to appear on my own face.
"I mean, yeah!" I laugh in response, giving him an over exaggerated nod. I cross one of my feet over the other as I walk, causing me to bump playfully into JJ's arm. He lets out a high pitched 'sweet!' and I look down at the ground, resisting my reoccurring urge to fall dramatically into his arms and kiss him again.
JJ clears his throat and kicks a pebble across the dirt road that we've turned onto. "Hey, Brielle? Um, I- I don't want you to think that I- that the only reason I told you was so that we could kiss. Y'know, I mean, that's kind of a bonus, but you're like- I mean, I really do like you. Like, so much. And I-"
"JJ," I interrupt the boy's adorable rambling for the second time tonight. "I would never think that, I promise. It is an added perk, I will admit. But no, I... adore you, and I don't think that about you." I find myself to be rambling a bit now too, overwhelmed by his emphasis on 'so much'.
I hear him let out a sigh of relief at my words, and the brief tension that we unintentionally created is now broken. He thanks me quietly, and I lean up and kiss his cheek while we walk, just like I did last night at the party. I feel my cheeks go warm and red, thankful that he can't see my face in the darkness.
"Thoughts on real talk for a sec?"
"Yeah, shoot," I tell JJ, nerves bubbling up in my body as I think about what he might want to talk about.
He hesitates for a short moment before he begins to speak again. "How long have you liked me?" Oh god, please don't make me tell you.
"Well, I don't really think I knew it at the time, but pretty much since like, the second day after we met." I tell him honestly, memories of that first week rushing through my mind. "And we were at the beach, and you said you liked my necklace and I liked your rings. The rest, as they say, is history." I say the last sentence in a goofy accent, making both of us laugh briefly.
"The second day?" I was afraid he was gonna ask this.
"Yeah, remember when we hated each other's guts when we first met?" I can't help but laugh at the thought of our initial interaction and how rudely we bantered with each other until we made up.
JJ laughs loudly now too, and I'm glad that this is something we can joke about, rather than letting it make things awkward. "Why did that even happen?" I ask through another giggle, making eye contact with the boy next to me in the dim streetlights that line the last road before we get to John B's.
"I'll tell you why. I've been into you since day one, Brielle. I just didn't know how to act around you at first, so I was literally just mean. But you kept topping whatever I said to you, and that's when I knew, but I couldn't say anything yet."
"That's when you knew what?"
"That we were gonna get along. No one that I've ever met has been able to go back and forth with me the way you did." He says this with his hands, waving them in the air to emphasize his words. "After we were done fucking with each other and we made up, I realized that I was like, really super into you."
"Okay, why didn't either of us say something sooner? We could have been married by now or some shit!" I joke in an attempt to conceal the butterflies that have returned in my stomach as I listen to JJ talk about me like that.
"I've just been way too fucking scared to tell you."
"Me too," I explain nervously. "For some reason I had myself convinced that you didn't like me. Like, at all."
"Come on, no way you thought that!" JJ shouts with a chuckle. "You think I would spend every night with you if I didn't like you this much?" Good point.
"I dunno! But that doesn't matter now, does it?" I ask him coolly, bumping into him again as we near John B's place.
"Speaking of being scared," I begin with a funny look on my face. "Remember when you almost kissed me last night? Emphasis on 'almost'?"
"See? Too fuckin' nervous. But now," JJ grabs my chin with his hand and turns my head to face him, pulling me in again to kiss me as proof that he's not scared anymore. "I'm not."
I giggle at the feeling that flows through my body when our lips meet and continue on with my jokes. "It was kinda funny watching you chicken out over everything, though."
"I did not chicken out!" JJ defends himself poorly, knowing full well that what he just said is a lie.
"Chicken." I mock him playfully, throwing my arms up in the air. "You're a chicken! I'm in love with a chicken!"
My breath hitches in my throat as I realize what I just said. I avoid eye contact with JJ, hoping he didn't catch it.
Oh my god.
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j j
No fucking way.
Forget her calling me a chicken, even though I was not one, but did I hear her right? She's 'in love' with a chicken? And I'm the chicken? And she's in love with him? Me? What?
I clear my throat and shove my hands in my pockets, trying to keep my composure over the thought of Brielle actually being in love with me. I don't really have any time to ask her about it, cause we're basically at John B's by the time she said it. But by the look on her face and the burning feeling in my cheeks, I'm pretty I did hear her correctly, and she knows it too.
Neither of us say anything as we walk up the porch and stop for a second outside the screen door. The inside of the Chateau is totally pitch black, so John B's probably asleep, but I push the door open by putting my hand on it just above Brielle's head, and we walk in as quietly as possible.
I follow Brielle to the table so we can put all our shit down, and I notice her looking at me in the darkness of the house. "I meant it, y'know," She whispers to me quickly, leaving me totally stunned as she walks over to the couch and sets up the pullout bed for us to spend the night. She meant it? Goddamn. No fucking wonder I'm so in love with her. She's bold as hell, and I'm super thankful for that, cause I most definitely am not bold when it comes to things like this.
I stay standing at the table, watching her on the other side of the room. She flips her head over and lifts it back up with her hair tied up in a knot, then she catches me staring. Shit. I shake my head and pretend to be looking for something in my backpack. I hear the sound of her sneakers as she walks over to me, putting a hand on my back as she leans in to talk so she doesn't wake John B down the hall.
"I'm gonna go say goodnight to JB," She whispers again, rubbing my back quickly and leaning in further, leaving a kiss on my jawline. I give her a quiet 'okay', and once I hear her walk into the kitchen, I let out all of my built up excitement in the form of a happy dance. My boots make way too much noise on the hardwood when I do this, and Brielle peeks out of the kitchen to see where the noise came from. "You good?"
I stop in my tracks, putting a nervous hand on the back of my neck and the other on my hip. "Yeah, yep. All good. I am all good." Was that convincing? Probably not, cause she shakes her head and laughs to herself as she picks some stuff up off the kitchen counter and walks over to John B's room.
I search for my phone somewhere in my backpack now, and pull it out to see that I have no new notifications on the screen. Predictable, cause the only two people who I'm most likely to have texts from are in the same house as me right now. I toss my phone onto the pullout and walk down the hall to the spare room that I keep all my stuff in.
On my way, I stop just outside John B's room at the sound of Brielle's voice. I peek in through the door, careful not to make any noise. Brielle leans down closer to the sleeping boy and puts a careful hand on his hair, kissing him even more carefully on his temple. "Feel better, John B." She says just above a whisper, standing up and putting a cup of water and some painkillers on the table next to his bed. I catch myself smiling at the sight, my heart beginning to absolutely pound in my chest. God, she is too fucking sweet.
I rush quickly past the door of his room so Brielle doesn't catch me, and flick the light switch on when I get into mine. The room remains dark, so I turn the switch on and off a couple more times before giving up. No electricity. I move blindly through the room, pulling my tank top off and leaving it on the bed before I drop my boots on the floor with a loud thud. I grab a blanket from the bed too, and wrap it around my body as I walk back through the hall to the front room.
When I don't see Brielle, I peer into the kitchen to find her pouring water into two glasses, humming a quiet tune to herself. She dances around on the tile as she puts the water pitcher back in the fridge, even though there's no electricity to keep it cold. She stops mid-twirl on her way back to pick up the cups, and we catch each other's eye. I smile to myself, hoping that she can't see it even though I can see her grin as she stands next to the window. Holding the glasses up proudly, Brielle comes into the front room and puts them on the closest arm of the couch.
"So she's a dancer!" I say in a weird accent, moving around on the hardwood myself but failing miserably to impress her.
"Ah, yes!" She replies in the same voice, pulling the blanket off of my shoulders just enough so that she can wrap herself up in it with me. We dance back and forth, and I'm instantly brought back to 24 hours ago, when the two of us were dancing in a much more professional way to Taylor Swift at The Wreck. I feel myself just completely melt into the girl in front of me, my chin falling onto the top of her head as the warmth from her body inside my sweatshirt seeps into my skin.
Once we've stopped moving around, Brielle peels herself off of my chest and falls back onto the pullout, her arms stretched out wide. She sighs loudly, and normally you'd think that she would do this cause she's annoyed or something, but the tone of her voice sounds totally and completely content.
I stay standing for another second, admiring her quietly. If we were in a cartoon right now, I would have the hugest fucking heart eyes and my heart would be pounding so far out of my chest. Once I've collected myself, I drop myself down onto the bed, careful not to fall into Brielle. We both turn our heads to look at each other, and I see her smile when our eyes meet.
"Hi," She says cutely, her voice cracking as she tries to keep quiet.
"Sup?"
"Nothin'. I'm tired." Brielle repositions herself on the pullout so that her head is actually on one of the pillows, and I do the same shortly after.
"Me too," I chime in again, throwing the blanket in the air and letting it fall softly over us. "Sleep?"
She nods her head in agreement while yawning, and I immediately catch her yawn. She looks at me now, and another huge smile finds its way to her lips.
"Total dead giveaway that you were staring at me, y'know." Goddammit.
"I dunno what you're talking about," I whisper, getting comfortable on my side of the pullout. Brielle moves closer to me, her back fitting perfectly against my chest. I drape one of my arms over the side of her body, pulling her even closer into me and holding on tight. She places a soft hand on top of mine, and my free hand activates a mind of its own and finds its way to Brielle's hair, slowly untangling all of her windblown waves.
"Hey," I whisper to her after a few minutes of quietness. She looks up at the ceiling and responds with a 'hm?'. When I don't respond, she turns her head all the way to look at me, and I smile before placing a long kiss on her lips, never ever wanting to pull away. Ever.
Brielle giggles quietly to herself once we break the kiss, and she rolls back over to her original position. She whispers goodnight to me and I return the gesture, resisting the burning urge to tell her that I love her.
We lay quietly together for the rest of the night, our bodies pressed together like they were built that way. The only sounds that can be heard are the ticks of the old grandfather clock that sits in the corner of the room, and the voice of the girl in my arms as she says one last word for the night.
"Chicken."
And we drift off to sleep.
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thank you for your love and patience
chapter seventeen coming soon
<3