'I am so sorry,' I apologized to everyone at the dinner table when I served them almost burned fried rice. I cooked little, but this was one of the few dishes I was actually good at, and this was my first time cooking for everyone, and I messed up. This all happened because of Shahzaib. If he hadn't kissed me, then this wouldn't have happened. I was so baffled that I could hardly look at him. I felt awful for Saif because I told him I'd make him this dish because he also liked it. Now the poor kid was eating my poorly cooked dinner, or at least trying to.
'This is fine. Honestly, we were used to it because Yusaf sometimes has happy accidents like this too... but I have seen you in the kitchen. How did this happen?' Kanwal asked me and was quick to cover for me. She actually came home with some food that her friend packed for her, so we had options. I looked at Shahzaib and saw him only eating my food. Why was he doing this?
'Don't eat this, here' I passed him another dish.
'I am fine, I am almost full anyway, I'll eat this later' He politely refused and continued to eat the dish I made, and so did everyone else.
'Why are you eating this if it's bad?' I couldn't help but ask everyone.
'You made this, and it's just slightly overcooked. It's still good. Waste of food is not good,' Shahzaib's grandmother replied nicely, and I relaxed, but my appetite was gone, this family was good to me, Shahzaib was behaving strangely. Actually, we both were, and most importantly, the way I saw Shahzaib was changing, which was not good for me. We were not following the rules. I had to talk to him to remind him about what we decided. I was becoming too involved, and reel and real were starting to merge.
'I have a headache, is it okay if I go to my room? I will eat later' I looked at Aunty, and she asked me if I was okay.
'Yes, just...it's been a long day,' I told her, and Kanwal gave me a questioning glare wondering if everything was good between Shahzaib and me. I nodded to assure her everything was fine and left the table. I locked the door from inside to give myself some alone time. My single life with Ma was less hectic. Yes, we had a problem, but we shared those problems together, but my concerns about Shahzaib and his family were mine, and I couldn't talk to anyone about it. No one knew about it but us. I was about to call Jaan to discuss this, but what was I going to say to him when even I didn't know what the main problem was. I couldn't just call him to complain about how Shahzaib kissed me and how nice his family was.
'Seher' I heard Kanwal's voice from outside, and I opened the door and saw her with a tray carrying two cups of tea and a plate of cookies.
'I just thought you might want to talk...I can go back,' She started.
'No, please come in' I invited her in and closed the door again. We sat on the bed to talk.
'I just wanted to check if everything is okay? Nani told me what happened...thank you for helping her. She usually doesn't like asking for help and prefers to do things by herself,' She said.
'It's fine, things happen ...I wish she would stop feeling bad about asking for help...we all need help,' I told her, wondering if she was here to talk about this or something else.
'I know, some people are like that, even I was like that, but Yusaf changed that. I used to think I could handle everything, but sometimes you can't, and that's why finding someone you can rely on is so important. That's why you coming into Shahzaib's life is so important. You know I actually wanted to talk to you about Shahzaib. Is everything okay between you two? I noticed some tension during dinner' She brought it up.
'We had a little argument, but it's all good now' I replied in a light manner to not give it more attention, trying to make her believe that she didn't have anything to worry about.
'That's good because we have a surprise for you' His face suddenly changed from looking worried to excited as she called for Yusaf and Shahzaib to come to the room. What was going on? Minutes later, both Yusad and Shahzaib came to our room, and Shahzaib passed me a doubting look, and I shrugged.
'What's going on?' Shahzaib asked Yusaf, and instead of answering, he pulled out a piece of paper and handed it over to him. I watched Shahzaib as he glanced at the paper.
'What is it?' I got up from the bed and walked to him since his expression didn't give anything away. I didn't know whatever was on the paper, whether it was something good or bad.
'Our flight tickets,' He finally responded and cautiously stared at me as he passed me the paper.
'Turkey' I read the name of the destination and the date, which was 1 week from now. No, I wanted to scream.
'This is...' I began.
'Great, thanks...but you shouldn't have,' Shahzaib interfered before I could say anything vile.
'She is just excited. She always wanted to go to Turkey, right Seher' Shahzaib pulled me close to him and secured his arm around me, giving me a little nudge to draw my attention away from the paper.
'Amazing, I knew it...see everything wants to see Turkey these days, I am so happy you liked our surprise' Kanwal chirpily said with excitement as if she was going. I needed to sit down. One after another, things kept piling up on top of each other, testing my strength.
'Also, Shahzaib, I wanted to ask you...some people already came to know about your marriage, but we haven't said anything, so how do you want to handle it? Should we do a little ceremony in the house just so we can invite some of our friends...it all happened too fast, you know, and Nani wants to do something like this' Yusaf added, and I felt like I was going to drop on the floor, thankfully Shahzaib was still holding onto me. Before he could answer Yusaf, I wrapped my hand behind him and pinched his back.
'One thing at a time, maybe after the trip?' He suggested.
'Yes, I think you are right, we are not ready, and let's do it in a hall instead of home. I knew even with a few of our friends, it would still be a lot with their family and stuff.' Kanwal supported Shahzaib, and I took a breath of relief. At least one thing was put on hold for now. We all sat together for a while longer and chatted about other things, and eventually, they left, and I laid down on the bed, closing my eyes. I was getting a headache.
'You're okay?' Shahzaib went to close the door and came over to the side of the bed to see if I was okay.
'What do you think?' I opened my eyes and looked at him. He tried to hold back his smile, but I could see it.
'Don't smile too much. You will be stuck with me too,' I told him and went to get a balm to put on my forehead to ease the headache.
'Let me do it' He snatched the balm from my hand before I could protest and made me sit on the chair and kneeled down in from me.
'I can do it myself,' I told him, but he didn't say anything. He simply took some of the balm in his fingers and started applying it on my forehead, pushing the right tension places. It felt so nice that I couldn't help but close my eyes, feeling at ease as he continued to press my forehead lightly.
'I am sorry you got stressed out,' I heard him say, and I opened my eyes. His hand almost touched my eyes. I flinched and pulled back when he suddenly shifted closer to check.
'I am fine' I hurried to get up from the chair.
'I want to talk to you,' I said to him, and he got up from the floor to stand in front of me.
'Whatever you did today, make sure it doesn't happen again,' I told him.
'What did I do? Massage your head?' He asked as if he was that naïve. I made a face when he stared back at me with eyes that proved he knew exactly what I was talking about. Never mind, if he wanted to hear it directly, then that's exactly what he was going to get.
'Don't ever kiss me again,' I firmly said.
'Remember, this is a deal,' I continued when he didn't say anything and continued to look at me, waiting for me to finish.
'And you love someone else,' I finished, and just then, he walked closer to me, pressing me back against the wall.
'Don't bring her in this conversation,' He said as it pained him to even talk about her.
'Why shouldn't I? Okay, fine, I won't mention her but don't kiss a girl if you don't love her.' I pushed him back to leave, but he quickly pulled me back in front of him.
'Do you have a problem with the kiss or her' He pulled the trigger with this question leaving me dumbstruck for a minute.
'Why does it matter which one?' I checkmated him.
'In fact, why don't you tell me why you kissed me in the first place? And don't say just because you felt like, I don't like such answer' I pointed out.
'We should keep our distance, Shahzaib, I understand we are kind of like friends now but even friends have limits and I will question you about these things so if you don't want that, don't pull these kinds of acts,' I added further when he failed to address my concerns. We continued to look at each other, and I waited for him to speak up, but he didn't. Then he walked away and left the room.
I tried to sleep, but I got so used to sleeping next to him in the last few days that I couldn't bring myself to sleep when he wasn't in the room. Where was he? Who cares. I didn't care. I shouldn't. This was a temporary lifestyle change, not a permanent change. I was lying on the bed, turning sides to get myself to sleep, when I heard the door opening, and he walked inside. I closed my eyes when he walked over to me and pulled the comforter up to my shoulder to cover me. I opened my eyes and saw him looking at me. Did he have my answer? He kneeled down to face me again and brushed the face out of my face.
'I am sorry, I shouldn't have kissed you,' He said, and I couldn't say anything back. He went away and laid down next to me, but I didn't turn to look at him. What was going on in his head?
'Actually, I am not sorry, you can think whatever you want' Just when I felt at slight ease, he spoke again, and I opened my eyes, thank god I wasn't facing him. I heard him shifting again, and I knew he was facing my back. Was he watching me?
'Go to sleep, Shahzaib' I whispered to him. I will deal with him. I had to. He was breaking the rules, but now I was going to fix it. I knew what I had to do.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
Honestly suggest me some good shows to watch. I used to love watching Indian series but now shows these days don't connect the same way. Let me know what you're all watching these days :D
Are you feeling the feels, slow burn I know but we love a healthy tension between the leads, don't we ;)