ROARA
I pushed open the door to the bedroom.
"You do what I asked?" Simon said, coming towards me. The sun was just rising out of the window behind him as he blocked the light streaming through with his tall frame. I looked at myself in the mirror. The pale scars across my face and my single white eye. There were so many things I'd never thought to question before.
I shrugged. "She's dead." I walked over to the wardrobe and started getting changed. "I'm going out. I'll get a guard to bring you the body."
"Out? Where?" I could feel his presence looming over me like a spider watching a fly it had caught, waiting for the right moment to crawl over the web and start spinning it's thread around the insect's body.
I pulled on a bra and threw a T-shirt over it, grabbing a pair of jeans. "I wanted some fresh air."
"We have a balcony for that baby, you know it's too dangerous to go out." Don't let him in. Do not let him in. Why would I want to go out? I had everything I wanted right here. Do not let him infect you.
"A walk outside would do me good." I said over my shoulder as I buttoned the jeans at my waist. "I've barely got to see Hong Kong."
"Why this sudden interest?" He asked, his voice turning gruff and suspicious.
I sat down to pull on my trainers and zip up my hoodie. "No reason really, just thought it would be nice."
He crouched down next to me. "Nice?"
Don't let him in. Don't let him in. Don't do it. I could feel how heavy the necklace was on my chest and I thanked the Lord he hadn't noticed it. The sword was just in front of me.
"Why didn't you bring me the body Roara? What are you hiding?"
"Nothing I-" He grabbed my throat and pushed me into the wall.
"Tell me Roara." He growled. "What's going on with you?"
The door swung open.
"Get your disgusting rodent claws off her." Alina snarled. She was dressed head to toe in silver and orange metal, her arms forward, the circles incased in the palms of her suit glowing golden.
The single second of distraction was all I needed. I grabbed my sword and wrenched it out of it's sheath. "One move and I'll strike you down." I whispered, the blade hovering next to his chest. With my free hand I buckled the sheath onto my belt and began to inch forwards.
"Wow." He stood up and I followed, my arm never moving from his heart. "You really did it, didn't you Stark? Incredible. Want a round of applause?"
"Might be nice." She shrugged. "I did put a lot of effort into getting her back."
"But she's not really back, is she." He beamed at us. "Because I've still got her locked away in the back of her own head, where she'll never be able to free herself."
"Jesus christ." Alina moaned, scratching the back of her short hair. "I keep telling you people, stop underestimating me and my friends, it's going to get you killed!" A beam shot from her right palm, moving so fast Simon didn't have time to react, and it hit him square in the shoulder.
"I can take her back you know." He sneered. "I've already started." He looked at me, his hand gripping to where the beam had burnt through his skin. "Can't you feel me?"
No. I couldn't. For the first time in a very long time I felt free. "Your hold on me is weakening." I spat.
"Is it?"
"Don't listen to him." Alina instructed. "He's getting you to question yourself."
"Aren't you hungry Roara?" He purred, taking a step towards the tip of my sword.
I nodded mutely.
"Then give in. Let me take you back. You won't have to worry about anything." Another small step forwards.
"I don't want anything you can give me. That's not what I long for." I looked into those steel, cold, eyes.
"What do you long for?"
"Revenge." I growled and lunged forwards with a swiping motion. He was too fast, my arms too weak, and he sidestepped easily.
"Getting rusty?" He mocked, pulling his fists up. "Put your sword away, let's do this properly."
I lowered my blade and sheathed it. I took a step towards him, his smile broadening. He knew that if he touched me, I was his again, and I was not going to let that happen.
"No." I said, pulling a tiny gun from my back pocket and shot. Blood poured from his side as he roared in anger. Alina grabbed my arm and together we turned and fled, racing down the corridor to the stairway.
"Thought you said he'd stolen your soul." Alina panted, kicking the doors open and taking the stairs three at a time.
"Soul probably wasn't the right word, more my essence." I grabbed the side of the bannister and threw myself over it, landing heavily on the steps below. I was far less agile than I had been, and I felt the shock reverberate through my bones. Footsteps could be heard pounding after us.
"Go faster!" Alina shouted, turning around to face whoever was coming. "I'll hold them off, remember, he can't touch you."
I flew down the stairs, my hand hovering on the railing as I ran, nearly tripping twice. Bucky, as I'd learnt his name actually was, had gotten rid of all the guards in front of the cells. The doors were wide open and he was crouched in front of the cell of a man I recognised to be Captain America, although he looked far less heroic now and far more tired.
I ran forward to the control station, copying movements I'd seen Simon do to open the cells. I slammed my hand on the main button and the glass doors opened.
"Go, go, go!" I screamed, hurrying them all out.
"Thought she was tryna kill us?" Sam asked Bucky, who just shrugged.
"Is Alina here?" The slim dark girl asked, not moving from her cell. She was still cradling the boy from before, but his skin was no longer a pinky colour, more a pale grey. I ran past Loki who had just stepped out of the cell, and dropped to the floor, skidding over the cold floor to the both of them. I pressed two fingers to his neck.
To my surprise the girl placed a hand on my arm. "Thank you." She whispered.
I shook my head. "Don't thank me yet."
"No, thank you for trying." Her gaze felt like it was drilling itself into my head. "For trying to come back to us. It must have been difficult and painful."
I sniffed. "His pulse is weak. We've got to get him to the healer girl." I put an arm under his knees and my other under his back, using the muscles in my thighs to lift him up. "Man with the giant metal frisbee."
"I'm Captain America."
"Yeah." I grunted. "The man with the giant metal frisbee. You do a lot of leader stuff right? Could you lead people out, the healer and the man with the metal arm, they have weapons and spare fighting gear out back with a man called Angry and another called Joyful."
The arrow man frowned at me. "You mean Alina and Bucky, and Fury and Happy?"
I nodded, shifting the burned boy in my arms so he would be more comfortable. "Those ones. Sorry the names are hard to keep in my head, capacity is limited right now."
One of the redhead girls, the one with shorter and curlier hair, peered through the doorway and up the stairs. "We've got company." She glanced back at me, a pained expression crossing over her face as she caught my eye, "Is there another way out?"
I looked around the room. All eyes were on me. I closed my eyes, trying to get a picture of the building in my mind, but it was hard. It was as though someone purposefully kept removing things I learnt about the compound in order to make it harder to escape. Pretty sure I knew who that was.
"Magic hammer man." I looked at the blonde guy. "Brother of the attractive one."
The blonde guy and Loki gave each other a look.
Thor sighed. "I'll take it, what is it?"
"Can you get your hammer to smash through," I tuned around to face the back of the room, "that wall?"
He shrugged. "Of course I can, it's a hammer from Asgar-"
"Great. Do it." Holding the boy tighter to me I ran past everyone and into the stairwell. I jumped, using air to push me up, through the gap in the spiralling staircase. I rose up through the levels and came to land behind where Alina was fighting Simon.
"Why are you here?!" She yelled. "Go back down!"
"The boy," I said in an exasperated voice, "he needs healing, I'll deal with-"
"Actually." Someone put a gentle hand on my shoulder. "I'd like to do this."
Loki stepped forwards, whipping knives out of nowhere and spinning them in his hands. I swallowed hard, my cheeks flushing. That really was attractive. Like so attractive. Like I thought my stomach was doing an actual backflip out of my body attractive.
"Give Peter to me." Alina hissed, taking him from my arms. "Get away from here."
I shook my head. "I'm staying with him." I jerked my head behind me.
"With Simon?" She asked, horrified.
I shook my head. "With Loki."
Alina tutted and ran down to one of the steps below, propping the boy, Peter, against the wall and beginning to knit together his skin.
"How did you break my toy?" Simon was snarling at Loki. "How did you break her?*
Loki laughed. "I just reminded her of who she used to be, of who she still is deep down. That's not something you can ever take away from Roara Woodson. It was all her, really. She's unapologetically herself. Always has been. You can't control what was never yours. And she has only ever belonged to herself."
I drew my sword and stood by Loki's side. "How many times did I visit you?" I asked him quietly as I kept my eyes on Simon, blood still trickling from his side.
"In the past four days?" He asked.
I nodded.
"Sixteen. You forgot every time. We had the same conversation over and over again. How did you know you came to visit me?"
I steadied my fighting arm, anger pulsating into me as though I'd never felt anything like it before. I'd forgotten what it was to feel my own emotions. "I was on my way to see you when Alina interrupted me. I think I remember speaking to you already tonight but this ungodly creature has mostly wiped it from my memory."
Simon sprang forwards, pulling a knife from his belt. Loki knocked him sideways, cuffing the side of his face with his fist. He could have stabbed him, but somehow I knew Loki wanted to do something more visceral to this man. Simon pushed onwards, his knife coming towards Loki. I stepped forwards, the clang of metal on metal filling the air.
"You want to take away my life?" I growled, stepping up a stair, forcing Simon to step back. "You want to take away my memories? My emotions? My future?"
"You never had a future with them." Simon hissed, his fist making a wild swing for me. The hilt of his knife made contact with my cheek, and my face hit the railing. Something about the way he said it made me think he truly meant that. That maybe somewhere deep down, he had wanted me by his side. But not as an equal. Something more like a pet.
A single drop of blood left my lips, falling to the floor like a droplet of red rain. I licked across my chapped and split lower lip. "You're going to pay for that." I growled.
"What, you're going to kill me?" He sneered, swaying slightly on the spot.
"No." I fixed him with a hard stare. "He is."
Loki's knife work was so quick, so elegant, I could barely see the blades moving. Simon and Loki moved in unison, forwards and backwards, a blow landing here and there.
A clattering noise came up the stairs and I turned in time to see Captain America rushing up the steps, bundling Alina into his arms, and kissing her passionately. She dropped the bandages she was holding and flung her arms around his neck, kissing him back, her feet lifting off from the floor as he picked her up.
"Yay!" Peter murmured from the ground, his eyes now half open. "Romance." He was clearly in far better shape now due to whatever miracles Alina had managed to perform. The burns were practically gone, all scar tissue and residue of injury dissolved into his skin.
The Captain carefully put Alina down, his cheeks bright red.
"I was so worried about you." Alina told him, her hands resting on his shoulders. "NEVER!" She slapped him around the face. "NEVER DO THAT TO ME AGAIN, DO YOU HEAR ME?"
The Captain put a hand to his cheek. "Did you just slap me?"
Alina grabbed his suit front and kissed him again.
"How," Loki grunted as he continued the assault on Simon, "sweet."
"Gunn's gone into hiding I think." Alina was saying to her partner. "Last time I saw him he'd disgraced himself."
"As long as he's still out there he's a threat." The man replied, glancing up at the fighting. I saw the horror on his face before I felt it myself. The pain. The fear. Then my feet were off the floor. Two hands grabbing at the material of my sweater, lifting me off from the ground, and throwing me hard over the railing.
I saw what had happened as I fell backwards, my mind replaying the events that I had only seen out of the corner of my eye. I hadn't been paying attention. I'd been distracted. Simon had punched Loki in the face, giving him long enough to turn to me and throw me backwards. Time seemed to move in slow motion. One second Loki's face was full of shock, the next he disappeared as gravity pulled me backwards.
Down and down I fell, my hair whipping around my cheeks. I saw Alina and the Captain speed up the stairs take over the fight with Simon, the looks of fury in their faces devastating. Peter getting up in a pained way and begin to make his way down the steps.
I saw Avenger after Avenger make their way up the staircase, armed with a variety of weapons and skills, all going for the same target.
I could see the levels passing me by as I grew closer to the ground, mere seconds passing like hours.
I saw Peter stumble into the slim bronze girl's open arms as she made her past everyone else, her eyes only on him, tears beginning to stain their cheeks, their arms so tightly wrapped around one another it almost looked like they were the same person. Tony Stark, Iron Man, seeing Peter alive and well, his armour beginning to attach itself to him as his face broke into relief and joy and worry all at once.
The curly haired redhead seeing Alina and grinning, and Alina returned the smile just for a second before going back to fighting. Bucky throwing a round shield up the stairs, and Cap catching it, nodding to him in appreciation and acknowledgement. I was seeing all these reunions, all these emotional reconnections, and I knew if I had my memories back I'd have them too. As it was I may never have them. You can't reunite with someone if you never really remember meeting them in the first place.
A strange sense of calm enveloped me as I fell, knowing that maybe I had done enough. Even though my head would crack on the concrete below and I would never see the end of the small revolution I had started, all these powerful people in one place, fighting the Ascendency. It might be enough.
I closed my eyes, wanting to see that face that was tattooed onto the back of my eyelids, just one last time before I hit the ground. That cheeky smile, those perfectly shaped lips, the chiseled cheek bones, his emerald eyes. I didn't even know why I wanted to. It just felt right, to see him one last time, even though it was just in my mind.
As I began to relax into the realisation that I wouldn't make it out of this, that maybe I was out of second chances, something strange happened. I accepted my fate. I accepted that this strange group of outcasts that had at one point been my family. I accepted who I was, and that I was one of them. I was Bucky's doll. I was Thor's old friend. I was Sam's buddy. I was Alina's bestie. I was Loki's love.
I finally knew who I was. I was Roara Woodson. And I hadn't gone down without a fight. I was four hundred and twenty one years old. I was a demigod, a daughter of the Earth. I was a strong warrior. This was my silent reunion, not only with the people I called my family, but also with myself.
Electricity seemed to run through my veins, my body convulsing in the air, pain making it's way from my fingertips to my brain. I didn't make a sound as the agony tore through me, ripping along my sides as though something was crashing back into me, as though I was being sown back up by an invisible needle and thread. My soul felt so big, so heavy, I didn't think I'd fit inside my own body.
Down and down I fell, memories of my life blinking through me, James from the bar in New York, the farm boys from next door, Thor's visits in the dead of night, the battlefields of France, tasting chocolate for the first time, drinking wine in meadows fresh from spring. All four hundred and twenty one years of memories, reminding me of what I had been through, of who I had always been. Of who I was. Of who I would always be.
I was nearing the end of my journey. The floor was coming closer, my speed picking up with momentum, my body feeling heavy. So this was it. I was out of chances. I hoped they would remember me.
Time caught up to me and I fell to the floor, the sound of my skull cracking filling the whole building, blood pooling around my hair, my eyes still open as the life drained out of them and I could see no more and the world went from colour, to grey, to blackness.
Only I didn't hit the floor. Time certainly sped up though. I came crashing down, the speed of it terrifying me, my limbs flailing aimlessly.
I fell into a pair of waiting arms, outstretched for me and only me.
I looked up into a pair of jade irises. "You caught me." I whispered.
"Of course I caught you." Loki murmured back. "I will always be here to break your fall."
The sounds of the fighting and shouting seemed to die out around me, as though it was only he and I in all of time and space.
I put my hand on his cheek, looking up into those incredible eyes.
"Loki." I breathed.
"I will always be here." He repeated. "Always. You are the only thing in my world worth fighting for."
And I felt it. Rushing through me. A sense of belonging, belonging I only found in his arms.
"I am found." I said, more to myself than to him. "You found me." I was no longer lost. I knew who I was and where I was, and I was right where I was meant to be.
"You found yourself, my love."
I shook my head. "It's you. It always has been. You. Found. Me."
I pulled his face towards me, pressing my lips to his. I had always loved him. And now I was letting him know. His arms wrapped tight around my body as the kiss deepened in passion, our bodies trembling together with the sheer force of it. He let me down to the floor but the kiss didn't break, my hands wrapping around his neck, bringing him closer. He bent down to keep kissing me as I went on tiptoe, pure joy filling me up. It had always been him. One of his hands gripped my waist while the other held the top of my back, pulling my body flush with his. I didn't need to breathe, didn't need to think. Nothing in my life had ever felt so right. It was as though my entire body was exploding out of me, fire roaring in my ears, burning over my skin. And then I realised I was on fire, my fire, flames rippling over me, covering the both of us in a deep red glow.
Nothing could touch us.
Fireworks were one thing. Literal fire was another. It swirled around our bodies as the kiss became rougher, needier, our mouths moving in sync, parting and colliding back together, as though all four hundred years were catching up to us all at once like a hurricane, like an avalanche, a tsunami. I was his and he was mine. He was mine. He was mine. He was mine. He was mine. He. Was. Mine.
And I was never letting him go.