"Good morning!" pagbati niya, sabay kaway sa akin.
Halos mahulog ako sa kama nang bigla ko siyang makita dahil sa aking gulat. Nakahiga siya sa tabi ko at nakadapa habang pinagmamasdan akong natutulog, siguro.
"What the fuck are you doing here?!" sigaw ko, sabay bato sa kaniya ng isang unan.
His shoulder just shrugged-off like it was all nothing. How dare him stare me while I was sleeping! Tumayo ako sa kama upang ayusin sana ang aking sarili, pero gayunpaman ay hinablot niya ang aking braso kaya naman napaupo ako sa kama... kung saan ay sa kaniyang tabi. I almost touched his right thigh when he did that.
"Ano ba? Will you stop--"
"Are you really getting married? To my cousin?" he suddenly asked, still holding my arm. You fucking jerk! There's no way! I won't marry your fucking cousin! Malaking turn-off siya sa akin!
"Why the hell are you asking me? Akala ko ba alam mo na dahil tutal isa ka rin namang Isles, ha?"
Muli ko siyang binato ng unan, kung saan nasa harap ko lang ang unan na iyon. Ginawa ko 'yon nang magawa na niya akong bitiwan, pero sa halip ay nabigo ako.
His hand was still on my left arm. Fuck you, Isles! I suddenly remember my phone. I thought he will give it to me?! What a fucking liar!
"The fuck are you doing to the pillows, you goddamn woman! Stop it or else--"
"Or else what? You won't give my phone back? Okay, fine! Just fucking take it, asshole! Sa'yo na 'yan dahil bibili na lang ako! Saksak mo 'yan sa baga mo!"
Hinawi ko ang mahaba kong buhok bago magpunta sa banyo upang maligo na sana. Pero kumatok siya sa pinto bago ako makapag-hubad ng aking damit. Argh, fuck you! Pati ba naman sa banyo susundan mo ako?!
"Fine, I'm sorry! You don't have to buy an another one. Take your phone here instead!" I heard him but I just ignored him.
I showered for almost 30 minutes. Actually, mabilis lang naman ako mag-shower kaso sinadya ko talagang tagalan ng kaunti dahil baka hinihintay niya ako roon sa kama.
Shit...
Ngayon ko lang napagtanto na wala akong dalang damit ngayon. Ni kahit tuwalya ay wala ako! I also looked at my sensitive part which made me more shocked.
Fucking period! Bakit ba wrong timing 'to kung dumating?!
Argh, fuck! How can I tell this to him? Nevermind! Bahala na si batman! I should shout instead kaysa naman sa wala akong gawin dito. Ipinangbalot ko muna sa aking katawan ang suot kong damit kanina dahil tutal ay wala naman akong tuwalya upang ipang-tapis ang aking katawan.
"A-Are you still there, asshole?" I tried my best to shout, but it looks like he didn't hear me.
Fuck! I want to shout his name instead, but hell I remember that I don't even know his name yet.
"Why are you shouting, woman?" I suddenly heard him, laughing as well as he said that. God damn it! Why is he laughing?! "I'm just here waiting for you. What are you shouting about?" he added. I already sense that he's just here, leaning on the bathroom door probably.
"I-U-Uh... Can I borrow an outfit or something? Fuck! Also, a pads! I mean, you know the uhm... t-the pads for girls--"
"What did you just say?" I heard his little shout. I knew it! Shit! Is he mad right now?
Well, 'di ko naman 'yon kasalanan! Isa pa, inalok niya ako sa condo niya kaya karapat-dapat niya rin akong tulungan dito!
"Pads, asshole! Napkin! I need an outfit to wear and towel as well! You're the one who offered me here in your condo so why don't you just help me? Argh! Can't you just buy a pads? And give me an outfit to wear, okay? Listen here, asshole! I'll pay you right after this just please--"
"Hush! Don't ever call me asshole again! Daven instead, Daven. I have my name here, you goddamn woman!"
Goddamn woman, huh?
Halos umusok 'yong tainga ko dahil sa kaniyang sinabi. Pasalamat siya hubad ako rito dahil hindi ko kayang lumabas ng banyo! Kung hindi lang talaga ako hubad dito baka binatukan ko na siya ngayon. Tsk, magsama-sama silang mga Isles! Mga punyeta!
"H-Here. Just open the door a little so I can give your needs," he suddenly said as I heard him. What's up with his stuttering voice, huh?
I slightly opened the door. Bale nasa likod ako ng pinto habang dahan-dahang binubuksan ang pinto. Naglapat ang kamay naming dalawa nang namalayan kong naibigay na niya sa aking kamay ang isang white tee shirt at black shorts, kasama na rin ang tuwalya at napkin doon.
Bakit parang ang bilis naman ata? May napkin ba siya rito? O 'di kaya... may girlfriend siya?
A white v-neck tee and a black fluffy shorts? It's not my type at all! His girlfriend has a bad taste at fashion! Pero sino ba naman ako para tumanggi since wala naman akong dalang damit e 'di ba?
Magtiis ka, Risha!
"Really? Wala man lang 'thank you'? After you ordered me to look like your maid here, but had no intention of saying thank you? And seriously? Have you held a man's hand before? Probably, not. Never knew about that since you look like a typical bitch who would seduced any man," he chuckled.
Nalaglag ang panga ko sa mismong sinabi niya. Kumalas siya sa pagkakahawak ko sa kaniyang kamay. Wait! Did I really held his fucking hand? That's bullshit, Risha! You should go back to your senses now!
"Damn it," bulong ko, nagmadaling isinara ang pinto sa padabog na paraan. Ang dahilan kung papaano lalong humalakhak ang hayop ayon sa aking malakas na pandinig.
It's not funny. I don't fucking care why is he laughing there. Tangina, sumakit sana ang tiyan mo.
I'm not the kind of lady who tries to be a cool or trendy. I'm individual, definitely individual because nothing is cooler and more attractive than a big trendy comeback. And this jerk? Who just helped me about yesterday was just nothing... but a mirror one or the kind of exchange that starts. Speaking of the mirror, what I see is what I reflect. If I don't like what I am seeing, then I am not satisfied with it. If I am standdofish, that's because I am.
I bite my lower lip as I fixed myself. I started to wear his girlfriend's clothes and what the fuck!
Ano kayang hitsura ng girlfriend niya? Kung sana maganda 'yon, ayos pa sana pero napaisip ako na hindi siguro maganda ang girlfriend niya nang dahil sa bad taste siya in fashion.
"I'm done," I coldly said as I combed my hair at last since it's still wet.
Sinubukan kong maghanap ng blower kanina, pero mukhang wala naman kaya 'di na ako nag-abala pang hanapin iyon dahil para saan pa ba 'yon? Matutuyo rin lamang ito.
"Sheesh, you look so good," he said then whistled too.
"You shut up, asshole," I glared at him.
I couldn't believe that he even tried to compliment me. This jerk must be kidding right now or maybe... his fashion taste is bad as well.
"Hey, come on. I told you to not call me that. I'm Daven, okay? Daven Nick Isles. For sure you already know who I am within the Isles family and my cousin too." He let out a smirk on his face as he started to give my phone as well.
"And... here's your phone, your fiancé must be worried. You should call him rather than talking a shit here."
Pft! You're the one who is talking a shit here!
I successfully got my phone as soon as possible on his hand. Binilisan ko ang pagkuha, pero nabigo ako sa kaniyang ginawa. His hand were holding my hand out of sudden now. I feel cringe by his touch.
Hawak ko na ang phone ko. Pero nanatili pa rin ang kamay niya sa aking kamay na para bang pinaglalaruan niya ito.
"Not so fast. We must create a deal first before calling my cousin's number. As you can see, my cousin has a big crush on you years ago and until now. I think--"
"It's never been cool to hear that shit, Daven. Don't act as if we are so close to talk about it." Malakas kong ikinalas ang aking kamay kaya naman ay nabitiwan niya ako.
I pointed my hand in front of him using my index finger. "You. You and your whole family are nothing to me. I am Risha Xandra Tanquile, asshole. I never been accepting a defeat within your family in my existence. You should mark my words."
Be still and act fearless in thine own mind and spirit. I always thought to myself to be a sovereign like other girls or like how my friends do. Just like Zara and Gairel... they are the example and they are my favorite ones as well. To create well, I have been my own way to be a bad, happy and to be a sovereign one.
Before anything else, my phone suddenly rang. I quickly answered it without noticing the ID caller. It could be one of my friends and they must be worried or something.
"Get the fuck ass out there, ate! Where the fuck are you and--"
I quickly turned the speaker off since it's too loud. Damn you, Rianne! Why is it to be you?
"Why the hell are you shouting? Can't you just leave me alone?" I tried my best to sound like I am such a good woman.
Gayunpaman ay syempre may diin pa rin sa aking tono, na siyang aking pinapahiwatig na ako'y galit sa aking kapatid. "Tell mom and dad that I won't be home."
I keep hearing her nonsense lines. I decided to hang this up since she've gone so far. But she suddenly said something, making myself swallowed and frowned before i could hang this up.
"Ate, ano ba?! Nandito sa mansyon ang fiance mo! You need to go here! Please, you should cooperate with him! After all, you guys are getting married soon and--"
"You stay out of it, Rianne! You guys can't stop me! Tell him that I won't go anymore. I have no longer to be there and I have my own house, alright? If he wouldn't believe it, then it's his own problem." I ended the call right after my words.
Hinawi ko ang buhok ko tsaka bumuntong hininga, nagpapakita na galit talaga ako ngayon.
Fuck that marriage! Fuck that guy! Fuck them all!
Kumuha ako ng tubig sa pitsel sa padabog na paraan kaya naman muntik ko nang mabasag ang baso. Mabuti na lang ay nandoon si Daven upang masalo iyon. I just rolled my eyes as our eyes created a contact.
"Your cousin... what's his name?" I asked to avoid the awkwardness.
"I thought you're mad about him. Why are you asking me out of sudden?" he also asked.
Tinignan ko siya at hinawi ang aking buhok. "You know what? I asked you first, Daven."
Umiling at nagkibit-balikat siya. "Frenzon. He is Frenzon Isles, my cousin. Some people call him Enzo or Zon. He is actually--"
"You don't have to say his facts. I'm fine with his name." I drank the glass of water after saying that.
Frenzon, huh?
What an unique name. The Isles family must have been think his name already before making Frenzon as their son. No wonder the Isles family looks so presentable... but the only problem is the marriage which I really hate about them. The way they are forcing me to marry their son wants me to vomit.
They don't own me. I only own myself and I am not planning to give myself on everyone. I have my own life and principles. Also, freedom is my happiness.
Being sovereign is my thing. But doing something that someone else is telling you to do it is not my thing. I don't need to hang-out in a posse and try to act as a sovereign one because as an individual, I am sovereign already.
"What if we tell them that we are dating, will they going to accept that? Oh, don't get me wrong. I'm just trying to help you and it seems like... you really don't want this marriage. You already know what I mean, right?"
I know what he meant...
"Pretend to date. Pretend that we have a relationship. Let's pretend that we truly love each other, will that help?"
I slightly looked at him. He suddenly looked so serious this time. Hindi ko magawang maitago ang pagkabigla ko mula sa aking mga namilog na mata nang sabihin niya iyon sa akin.
Is he damn serious? Ako? Ako magpapaloko sa isang Isles? There's no way! Baka isang patibong lang 'yan. After all... he's also an Isles. I think he is planning something to make me give up... to end up being smitten on his cousin.
Pero may isang bumabagabag sa aking isipan...
Paano kung hindi ko tanggapin ang alok niya? It's probably my loss, of course. But I should give him a chance since he's willing to help me. Wala na akong pakialam kung isa siyang Isles since desperada na ako sa gusto kong mangyari.
Wala namang mawawala kung itatry ko iyon.
But fuck! What if niloloko ako ni Daven tapos may plano rin pala siya sa amin ni Frenzon? Shit! Nag-aalala ako sa anumang magiging desisyon ko ngayon.
I want my decision that keep me heading in the direction in which I wanted to go.
"Just accept it or it's your loss, miss. 'Wag mo na sayangin, ako na 'to," he added as he smirked.
I don't want to end up being counter productive like I can just be quickly begin to spiraling into stress and confusion. Damn fucking you, Daven.
"Don't you have a girlfriend? Perchaps, does she mind?" paninigurado ko.
My choice should be at consistently associated with more positive outcomes. Having no choice for me is a particularly detrimental for experiencing anticipated regret and uncertainty.
Most of the wrong decisions occur because they feel comfortable and automatic. Our emotions steer us incorrectly. Our perception of time is inaccurate and skewed towards the present. Our status on internal sense of colors how we view other people and ourselves to avoid regrets.
"Why? Do I look like I have a girlfriend to you?" he chuckled, "There's no way I have girlfriend, okay? She'll feel jealous for sure. I wouldn't allow her to feel that... ever."