I kissed Skye's cheek.
"Good morning, my love." I whispered.
She blinked awake slowly and smiled up at me, snuggling into me.
"Good morning." She mumbled into my chest.
"I'm getting out of here today." I said. "I need to find them. I need to find them today."
"Why?"
"Because I can feel myself losing hope."
"How are you going to find them?" She asked.
"I'll find a way."
She yawned. "Alright. Let me have a shower first."
She slipped out of bed and wandered into the bathroom whilst I watched her go.
Elliott appeared in the doorway and frowned at me.
"Can we talk?" He asked.
"About what?" I muttered, yawning again.
"About you and Skye."
"Can't it wait until I'm actually awake?"
"I find people are more truthful when they're too tired to think of a lie." He said. "What do you want with her?"
"She offered to help and I didn't have the strength to turn her down." I muttered, stretching on the bed.
He chuckled.
"What do you want with her?" He asked.
I raised an eyebrow. "Are you asking me if I'm going to use her?" I asked. "Or if I love her?"
He considered this for a moment.
"Both." He replied.
I shrugged. "I'm not going to let her down."
"That's not an answer."
I smirked. "I'm not going to use her."
"Still not an answer."
"So what do you want me to say?"
"Do you love her?" He asked.
I paused. I didn't love her. Not now. Not yet. But she made me happier than I'd been in a long, long time.
"I think I could learn to." I said eventually.
He gave me a long look.
"Well when you figure it out." He said, "let me know."
I grinned. "Will do."
~*~
Once I was showered and dressed, I bounced on the balls of my feet impatiently whilst Skye and Elliott said a long goodbye.
"You ring me if he gets out of line, yeah?" He asked.
I rolled my eyes as Skye reluctantly agreed.
"I'll see you soon, Skye." He said as I took her hand and pulled her away.
"Bye." Skye called as we walked down the street.
She sighed and fell into step beside me.
"Where are we going?" She asked.
"Just for a walk. It would do us good to get some fresh air." I said.
"You're not so keen on Ellie, are you?" She said, smirking.
"What makes you say that?" I murmured.
"You've been itching to get out of there since we arrived." She told me.
I ignored her and continued to pull her down the street.
"So what now?" She asked.
"I already told you." I said. "We're going for a walk."
"Where to?"
"Can you just shut up and trust me?" I asked.
She bit back a smile and fell into step beside me, her hand snaking around mine.
We walked along and I slowly started to relax in the crisp air. I pulled her closer and kissed the top of her head.
"You love your sisters a lot, don't you?" Skye said.
"Of course." I replied. "They're my whole world."
She smiled, but there was something else in her eyes. Sadness.
"Must be nice to have someone who loves you that much." She whispered.
I squeezed her hand. I love you that much. I thought. But the words wouldn't come. Instead I asked the one question no one in the children's home ever asked.
"Why are you in the Children's Home?" I whispered.
"I'm not." She replied. "I'm in the middle of a park with one of my favourite people."
I ignored the attempt to change the subject and watched her, waiting.
She was silent for a long while until she began to fidget under my scrutiny.
"Why are you in the Home?" She asked instead.
"Mummy had a drug problem." I said. "She was very unpredictable. Up and down. Mood swings. One day, she just...disappeared."
I paused, remembering that morning. I woke up and fed Emma and Max, filling up bowls full of cereal and planting them in front of the television, before going to give Mummy a bowl of cereal too.
I entered the room and stared at the empty bed, looking around as if she was going to jump out of the wardrobe and smile.
"Mummy?" I called.
Nothing.
I sat on the bed and waited for her to show up and smile but she didn't. I heard Emma calling me and I went to see her.
"Where's Mummy?" She asked.
"I don't know."
She blinked at me in confusion whilst I felt my world being pulled out from under my feet.
I blinked away the memories and Skye kissed me softly, before brushing away the tear that slipped down my cheek.
"I'm here." She said gently and I was so glad she didn't try to tell me everything was alright or that things would get better or the hundred other things people said.
She pulled me close until I felt a gentle warmth spread from my heart through my body. Healing all the scars in my world.
What hurt the most was that it was just like when Mummy used to hold me.
~*~
My phone buzzed and I clicked the article that Darren had sent me.
TWO TEENS RUN AWAY FROM MCCARTHY CHILDREN'S HOME.
I looked at the pictures that popped up underneath and at the statement Emily had written.
I wondered how much longer this was going to take. I was going to be in so much trouble, and the longer I stayed away, the bigger the consequences would be.
But nothing could ever be enough to scare me away from seeing my sisters again.
When are you coming home? Darren asked.
I'm not.
Are you kidding? You're just going to run away? You're going to get in SO much trouble.
Did he think I didn't know that?
I don't care. I replied.
Is Skye with you?
Was that a worried note I heard there? I wondered how well he knew Skye. If she meant anything to him.
Yeah. She's fine. We're both fine.
We were fine. More than fine.
Where are you? What are you doing?
I paused, wondering how much I could trust him. He could get me in a lot of trouble if he really wanted. If he showed the police these texts I'm sure they would somehow be able to track us down. But a part of me needed someone, somewhere to know what we were doing. Just in case something went wrong. Someone needed to know. Someone had to tell my sisters I was looking for them. That I never gave up on them.
I'm going to see my sisters. I don't care what the consequences are. I told him.
He typed for a long time, probably ranting about what a stupid idea it was and that he was going to tell Emily and I was going to be in so much trouble and I shouldn't have dragged Skye down with me.
Good luck.
The message surprised me. I thought for sure he was going to threaten to tell someone. Maybe he would do. Maybe he didn't care. Maybe he was planning to get me in trouble before I even got a chance.
Or maybe, just maybe, he was giving me his blessing. The idea made me smile.
My fingers hovered over the keyboard for a while, thinking of all the things to tell him. We're safe. Tell Emily she can stop searching. If I find them I'm not coming back. I don't care what they do.
But instead all I said was
Thank you.