Reviewer: PeterPan2210
Reviewee: ItsBangtanBeaches
Story reviewed: Retrouvaille
_ _ _
Overall comments:
It's great. Needs a little bit of tweaking and it'll be perfect. The plot is great the content is almost there.
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Cover:
8/10
I get that it’s more of an aesthetic thing because all your covers are black and have bts members on them and that’s fair since you write BTS fanfics. But still there’s a girl in this particular story too, so I’d like if there was some representation of her too. Otherwise the visibility is fine.
Title:
6/10
It makes sense but here’s the thing, I’m not going to pick up a book whose title I do not understand. Retrovaille has a poetic ring to it, sure but it’s a very uncommon word. Most people probably wouldn’t know what it means. Now as a reader, my job would be to deduce as much as I can from the title itself but if I can’t understand the title itself and have to open Google for that, that kinda takes away the charm. And when the charm's gone, so is the interest. Maybe that’s just me but I prefer simple titles better to complicated and fancy ones.
Like ‘Fault in our stars’, ‘Divergent', ‘Twilight’ and the easiest of all- the titles of all the books in the Harry Potter series.
Description
10/10
It’s great.
Basic plot:
10/10
It’s great. It’s also realistic. At least for me **hides**
Content:
7/10
It was good but ill-usage of words, incorrect context really put me off. And you have a habit of over-describing stuff sometimes.
Otherwise the content was good.
Pace + Sequence:
9/10
I loved the pace, no doubts there.
Grammar + Punctuation + Tense:
6.5/10
You know why. I’ve marked a few of them. I couldn’t mark the others. But check it over please.
Structuring/Tone + Voice
7/10
You know why. The structuring was a bit awkward. A few tense mistakes. Edit those. I have marked some of them but not all of them.
Also some of the sentences were too wordy. Too long. Keep sentences short. Not too short but enough for it to not look like an entire paragraph.
Originality:
9.5/10
Falling in love with your best friend then leaving the country and then returning again sounds typical to me.
Reader enjoyment
8.5/10
Not really but it was good. Grammar mistakes and unnecessarily fancy vocab puts me off.
Overall score:
81.5/100
Good job!
Thank you for choosing me.
Please rate this review on a scale of 5 based on how useful it was and suggest improvements, if any.