But It's You at 5:53 // TOMORROW X TOGETHER (Oneshot) [TaeJun]

But It's You at 5:53

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Spotify Playlist I listened to while writing this: 
https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3uhHlMnBTjz19JljH6EMAh?si=b82012661a09415d

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There is a myth that when the clock hits 5.53 pm at the local carousel a boy with pink hair will appear and wander around, always in the same pink crop top, never to see before the evening chime. But beware of this innocent looking boy as you might see eternal death in his eyes within.

Though Taehyun didn't really believed such childish stories, which where only created to scare the little kids who ride the carousel every day, he still always found it funny to think about it when he sat in front of the carousel in the park enjoying the fresh air and the rustling of the trees. He always made sure that he kept an eye open for this sweet looking boy and checked the time every now and then, looking out for the magic number in which he is stated to appear. Taehyun has been doing this routine for about a week now and not once did he see that boy wandering around anywhere. He did not believe this stupid rumor in the first place anyways, but he still felt a disappointed feeling in his chest, when he still hadn't gotten to see him after a week of coming to the carousel. As if he really was that desperate to see a boy described this sweet. Not to mention that the rumor also includes that the boy only shows himself to the people he wants to. Maybe he just didn't want to show himself to Taehyun because he didn't look trustworthy enough or because of something else which Taehyun couldn't think of. Or maybe, just maybe this little horror story was just a hoax, but Taehyun was too caught up in his own little dreamland that he couldn't think of such a possible idea.

Even though this boy hadn't shown himself to Taehyun and it was already two weeks in which Taehyun was greeted with nothing but the sunset going down behind the majestic looking carousel, overflowing the whole sky with an orange fiasco, he still looked habitly at his phone awaiting the clock to hit 5.53 pm. And when it did, he looked up from the bright display and examined the surroundings with an expectant and hopeful gaze and later realised that like yesterday there was nothing to see. At Least that is what Taehyun thought because if his eyes weren't deceiving him right now, he could swear that there was a tall boy in a pink crop top standing in front of the carousel, looking at it with an disinterested expression. Taehyun wasn't really sure if his daydreaming got out of his head and materialized itself in front of him right now or if he just went insane. A boy so sweet like candy and soft like marshmallows stood there a few meters away from him, his pink hair glowing conspicuously and his whole appearance radiating undefying beauty, making Taehyun's heart burst out of his chest.

He didn't actually think about what he should do when this situation comes to reality. In his mind Taehyun just stared at this mysterious boy, doing nothing but admiring him. He already had imagined this boy in his head and thought about what he could look like, but in reality he was way more good looking and way more cute than Taehyun thought.

He couldn't just sit there and stare at him like a weird creep, he had to do something because what if it was the only time he would see him right then and there? Hastily he stood up from the bench he was sitting on for hours now and walked straight to the carousel. With a few glimpses to the pretty boy, Taehyun positioned himself in front of the large machine, nervously thinking about what he was going to do next. His eyes swifting to the boy and then back to the plastic animals, that were galloping in a circle in front of him, and then swifting back to the boy again. From this view Taehyun was able to perfectly see the boy's face, examined it carefully, imagining his hand touching the boy's flawless skin delicately.

The boy caught Taehyun staring at him visibly, making him turn away his head in embarrassment. After his rapidly beating heart calmed down, Taehyun looked back to the boy only to realise that he wasn't there anymore. A sorrowful feeling spread through Taehyun's body, displacing all his excitement he felt and leaving behind nothing but disappointment yet again. Sometimes he hated himself for being so introverted, making him seem creepy when in fact he just didn't know how to confront people. Taehyun let out a loud sigh and looked down at the stairs placed in front of his feet.

>Well done, Taehyun, you've made a fool out of yourself yet again.<, he thought to himself.

"Such Bullshit", he said out loud, kicking the stairs with one foot in regret.

"What's Bullshit?", came from the side and Taehyuns body froze in shock.

He turned his gaze in the direction from which the voice came and was greeted with the pretty face that he had only seen from a far distance until now. Not only did his heart beat in a rush because of the shock of the boy's sudden appearance right next to Taehyun, but also because of the presence this boy radiated. Taehyun's mind went insane seeing the boy up close now, recognizing every little detail of his facial features. The first thing that caught Taehyun's interest was his pink, full lips that seemed so soft, Taehyun questioned what they would taste like. He imagined them tasting like strawberries. His gaze wandered up to the boy's long, wide eyes which were shaped kind of gracefully. Remembering the second sentence of that myth, Taehyun quickly looked away from his eyes and instead pierced through the boy's soft looking cheeks making Taehyun blush at the thought he had earlier.

Investigating his whole appearance made Taehyun forget about what the boy even said to his upset statement. Yet again he had just stared at him and didn't even think about answering his question let alone even say anything at all. The boy noticed that Taehyun wouldn't answer his question in an immediate time, so he jumped right to the less trivial question.

"Why were you staring at me?", he asked the smaller one with a plain face.

>Because you are the prettiest boy I ever saw.<, thought Taehyun to himself and was definitely not going to say that. He embarrassed himself too much now with his silence and was not going to ruin this by making it even more embarrassing by also talking like a weirdo.

"Because you look like you are made out of candy.". That wasn't a very good answer either.

Taehyun narrowed his eyes in embarrassment and wished he could just disappear right now. He was nervous so his behaviour and talking were pretty much controlled by that, which wasn't really great.

"I expected a less odd answer but I will go with that then.". At least he was understanding.

"Are you coming here often?", Taehyun asked, rather coming straight to the main point than talking further about his weird behaviour. The boy hesitated a bit with his answer.

"Not really."

Maybe it was just a dumb coincidence that this boy fitted perfectly the description and in reality he was just some random guy. Or he looked like that on purpose so he can have a little fun with scaring the kids at the park or to scare Taehyun. It was not really inconceivable that he could be friends with the people from school, who had told Taehyun this story in the first place. Maybe it was part of a prank they did to make a fool out of Taehyun for believing such stupid shit and watching him being embarassing in front of a pretty guy which happen to be his ideal type.

"And you? Do you come here often?", the boy asked.

"No.", Taehyun lied, not wanting to get humiliated by him. His eyebrow twitched a little in disbelief at Taehyun's answer.

"Do I know you from school by any chance?". Changing topics is always the best way to avoid awkward situations.

"I don't go to school.", he said straight away. Maybe he was one year older than Taehyun.

"Why do you think that? Are there more sweeties like me at your school?", he grinned amused, his cheeks going round like sugar plum candy.

"No, it's not like that. It's just...you look exactly like the person people at my school are constantly talking about.", Taehyun explained and wasn't really sure if he should do that.

"What are they saying exactly?", he chuckled.

"It's just a stupid myth. They probably just made that up to pick on me."

"Why would they do that?"

"Because I'm weird?"

"You are.". Ouch.

"But that isn't a reason to bully you.", he said honestly.

"They aren't bullying me. They are just teasing me, it's not that deep."

"Doesn't sound like that.". His face not moving an inch and not believing any of Taehyun's lies.

The boy's plain answers annoyed Taehyun. The minimal amount of expressions he showed in the last ten minutes were very draining and Taehyun got frustrated with that. He seemed, apart from his candy-like appearance, like a lifeless person.

"Are these people your friends?", the boy asked now. Aside from his lifelessness he radiated, the boy was very curious especially about Taehyun's private life.

"I mean...yes? Not really but maybe soon? We talk a lot in our lunch breaks."

"Then I think you should distance yourself from your Not-really-but-maybe-soon-friends."

"Thanks for the advice but I don't need it."

"If you say so."

"Do you have any friends?", Taehyun asked now.

"I had friends."

"Oh, I'm sorry. What happened?". Taehyun felt a glimpse of regret for asking about his friends.

"Nothing special we just... grown apart you could say.". Taehyun could swear that he saw a little of a sad emotion in his eyes.

He didn't know what he should do to break this awkward silence which surrounded them now, pressuring on them with all might. Taehyun's eyes looking over to the plastic horses of the carousel beside him, gave him an idea, which he should have thought about way sooner.

"You wanna go on a ride?", he asked the boy of whom he still didn't know his name. The boy's plump lips form a smile in joy.

"It would be a pleasure, cutie.", he grinned seemingly proud of making Taehyun blush with this nickname.

"You can just call me Taehyun."

"Whatever you want, Taehyun. Then you can just call me Yeonjun."

Yeonjun. His name was Yeonjun.

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Riding on this shiny carousel, the shimmering lights spinning in circles and the sparkling horses marching in unison, made Taehyun feel like being in a dream. A dream in which he could just admire the mysterious candy-looking boy whom his name was Yeonjun, while sitting on one of the many horses and right behind him Yeonjun, smiling with his mouth wide open, seeming far different than the emotionless facade he showed earlier. He didn't know what that strange feeling was that he felt in his chest, but Taehyun knew that he wanted to feel more of it. Wanted to feel every ounce of that warm tickle that spread from his chest down to his feet and up to his head. He felt some kind of ease, being with someone like Yeonjun who seemed to put everyone in a good mood right away when he wasn't trying to interfere in uncomfortable topics. It was way easier to talk to him, now that he didn't sound like an emotionless robot. Maybe Yeonjun wasn't really good with having conversations either.

"Did you ride on such a carousel before? You look like a small child getting to experience something like this for the first time in their life.", Yeonjun asked him, grinning amused. Taehyun only now realised that he was smiling brightly, not because of riding the carousel but because of Yeonjun's cute smile. He quickly stopped smiling in embarrassment and felt his cheeks heating up.

"Yes, I did ride on a carousel before. But you aren't really better, you are smiling like the Cheshire Cat!"

"Don't compare me with the cat from Alice in Wonderland. Also in no way am I smiling that creepily.", Yeonjun exclaimed playfully annoyed.

"You are right. You smile like a child that gets to experience something like this for the first time in their life.", he repeated Yeonjun's words.

"How unoriginal. And no, this is also not my first time riding a carousel.". Yeonjun looked a bit serious saying that but Taehyun barely noticed it because he was too caught up with his voice that he wanted to hear more of.

"Aren't you cold?", Taehyun asked confused. If Yeonjun was just a random person then why would he wear such light clothes on such a cold evening? Taehyun additionally wore a jacket over his hoodie so he wouldn't freeze to death today.

"No, I'm not. Is that some kind of hidden offer so you can give me your jacket?"

"No! I'm just asking because you are wearing a crop top in October when it's five degrees outside."

"Oh, right.", Yeonjun realised and it seemed as if he had been discovered.

"Well, it has long sleeves.", he then explained and showed off his pink crop top excitedly. Taehyun got a small glimpse of his tummy as Yeonjun raised his arms and showed off his long sleeves, making Taehyun flustered. His gaze was directed at Yeonjun's arms but sometimes he looked down for a second just to quickly look away again.

"It does. I think you don't need my jacket then."

"I guess not.", Yeonjun replied with a smile.

The sun was already swallowed by the horizon and left behind a dark sky, sprinkled with little stars shining down to the earth like galaxy fireflies and the moon glowing like a big lamp, lighting up the surroundings of the carousel. Only a few people, besides Taehyun and Yeonjun, were still near the glowing machine but Taehyun felt like they were the only ones left there alone. Perhaps it was the constant spinning in circles that made him warp up time and space or it was Yeonjun who hypnotized him with his soft smile and his pointy nose and his gleamy eyes, wanting to trap him in a constant time loop so he would forget the outer world and stay with Yeonjun forever at this dreamy moment.

Either way it was an immense experience, which Taehyun wanted to live out again and again and again. And after they went down that gigantic dream machine, Taehyun thought about repeating this moment directly tomorrow.

"I need to go now. I have school tomorrow.", Taehyun declared saddened but with anticipation for tomorrow deep in his chest.

Taehyun slightly moved his body towards his way home but before he took a step, he stood there still, contemplating if Yeonjun will be even there tomorrow too.

"You are going to be here again tomorrow, right?", Taehyun asked slowly. Yeonjun smiled at his question, Taehyun's inner heating up as a response to it.

"I'm always here. It's just my decision if I let you see myself.", Yeonjun smiled, making Taehyun frown in confusion.

Taehyun turned around perplexed and wanted to go home but he couldn't. He stood there, not moving an inch, back turned to Yeonjun and thought about all this nonsense. He said that he doesn't really come here often so why did he say that he is always here? Yeonjun knew why Taehyun couldn't get himself to move. He knew what he was thinking.

"Maybe the people from your school are onto something."

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The clock hit 5.53 pm. Taehyun walked with quick steps to the carousel, passing by people sitting on benches, minding their own business while enjoying the gentle October weather. The closer he got to the light that gleamed from the carousel, the faster his steps got, almost running to the place where he would see Yeonjun again. Taehyun had mixed feelings crumbling up in his chest, sensing the excitement to see him again but also the anxiety that he wouldn't be there like he promised. Well, he didn't really promise it, he rather said that he would always be there, which could mean that he either shows himself to Taehyun or not. If his reference should indicate that the myth was real and Yeonjun really only ever appears at a certain time, then that must mean, regarding one of the myths' saying, that he can make himself invisible to certain people if he wanted to. Although Taehyun shouldn't actually believe this myth considering just because he randomly met a boy with pink hair, wearing a pink crop top, doesn't mean it's true. It's so stupid to think that, but Taehyun couldn't really dismiss it so easily.

Standing right infront of the inscrutable boy, who was sitting on the stairs of the carousel, his chin resting on his left palm, kept Taehyun thinking about whether he was actually telling the truth or was just messing with him like the people from his school.

"You ran a marathon or why are you so out of breath?", Yeonjun asked with his face still resting on his hand and smiling up at Taehyun, looking like a cute gummy bear.

"What did you mean by 'It's just my decision if I let you see myself.'?", Taehyun asked straight away, ignoring Yeonjun's allegation.

"You are really good at remembering every word I've said.", he noticed, trying to shift the attention to something else.

Taehyun, not responding to what Yeonjun said, just stared at him with an expectant gaze. Yeonjun sighed at his expression and raised his head from his palm.

"It's like I said."

"So you can make yourself invisible just like that?"

"You sound ridiculous."

"You too. First you say you aren't coming here often and next thing you say you are always here, you contradict yourself."

"And you said that you aren't really coming here often too, which was also a lie."

Taehyun froze. How would he know that? Taehyun didn't contradict himself like Yeonjun stupidly did, so the only possible answer would be...

"How do you know that?", Taehyun asked in disbelief.

Yeonjun got up from his sitting position, standing very close in front of Taehyun now and sighed displeased. If he wouldn't feel upset, confused and anxious at the same time, Taehyun would have blushed at this little space being between them, only inches separating them from touching their tummies. He was warm, Taehyun could already feel it.

"If you are not believing me, then that's ok. But I know that you weren't looking at your phone the past two weeks, always at the same time, for nothing."

Taehyun was creeped out. By the thought of Yeonjun not being real, only some apparition which occurred at 5.53 o'clock, his whole just an hallucination, fake. It was all too much for Taehyun. He didn't actually think that this myth was real and even if he really did (he didn't know anymore), it frightened him. He wanted to go, run away from this piercing light coming from this terrifying machine ahead of him, this lonely place only giving Taehyun an uncomfortable pain polluting his whole inner self and this innocent looking boy who was horrifying and disturbing and not real.

With a painful look on his face Taehyun abruptly turned around, still a bit startled and overwhelmed by all this and started walking away from him, from Yeonjun. Yeonjun tempestuously clenched Taehyun's wrists with his right hand, holding him back from going any further.

"Don't go.", he said to him.

"Please, I didn't mean to scare you.". His hand clenched Taehyun's wrist with more and more strength, not wanting him to go.

Taehyun turned his head around and looked Yeonjun right in the eyes. His eyes pierced through Yeonjun's, examining them carefully with a serious gaze anchored in his face. Taehyun saw despair. Yeonjun looked at him frowning and was generally scared that Taehyun would leave him. It made him rethink his thoughts. He was still disturbed, but Taehyun couldn't get himself to free his hand from Yeonjun's grip. It was a force that prevented him from turning around again and walking past these people sitting on these benches and minding their business, not at all caring what is happening here right beside the carousel right now. He didn't want to leave him. He wanted to hold his hand and caress it, hear him talk and listen to his soft voice, he wanted to be with him longer.

Taehyun slowly turned his body towards Yeonjun, his gaze softened and he took a little step closer to him so he could feel his warmth again. Yeonjun's timid expression disappeared gradually and looked more relieved now, still holding onto Taehyun's wrist but slowly moving his hands down into Taehyun's. Taehyun felt a ticklish feeling while paying attention to Yeonjun's movements. His warm, soft hand gently making his way into the right position, Yeonjun's fingers tracing down the back of his hand and Taehyun feeling every little touch so clearly. His eyes are still locked at Yeonjun's sculptured face, thinking about how beautiful an apparition can be and enjoying his presence.

Taehyun didn't feel uncomfortable anymore, nor did he feel frightened by him, how could he? A boy so gentle and sweet could never be so disturbing neither so scary. Yeonjun was safety, he was warmth, he was a feeling, he was love. Yeonjun is a desirability and Taehyun felt that desire. That desire to be where he is.

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The clock hit 5.53 pm. Taehyun sat at the bench across from the carousel, his hand intertwined with Yeonjun's, who was sitting right next to him. Both of them looked at the monstrous carousel, it's light reflecting on their bodies made them shine brightly in the darkness as well. Taehyun tried to be aware of everything he could feel at this moment. His hand laying on Yeonjun's thigh, sensing the fabric of his light blue pants on the back of his hand and Yeonjun's body heat embracing it comfortably. Then Yeonjun's thumb caressing Taehyun's index finger, tracing it up and down and then going on with his middle finger doing the exact thing all over again. Slowly examining the shape of his fingers and the size of his hand, all without looking at it once. Taehyun wasn't really ticklish but he was a bit taken back. Yeonjun's touch made him all fussy.

"How does it feel?". Yeonjun turned his head in the direction where Taehyun was sitting, him still looking forward.

"How does it feel to know that you aren't real.", asked Taehyun again more precisely. Yeonjun looked at him and viewed his face carefully.

"I have gotten used to it.", Yeonjun said calmly, his eyes following the bridge of Taehyun's nose.

"And how did it feel when you weren't used to it?"

"I was scared. Scared to be alone for the rest of my existence. If there will ever be an end to it.". Taehyun furrowed his brow.

"So you aren't scared anymore?"

"I am."

Taehyun looked down to both their hands, observing Yeonjun's movements and feeling weird all of a sudden. But it wasn't as immense as the comfort he felt with him.

"Why is it that you always appear only at a certain time? And why at 5.53 pm of all times?"

"I don't know. I can't remember why I'm here and what I am. Who I am."

"Yeonjun.", Taehyun just replied.

"No shit, Sherlock."

"Well done ruining this serious moment.", Taehyun exclaimed snappishly and raised his head.

"I didn't want you to stay so we can talk about my miserable fate as a sugar exploded ghost."

"And why did you do it then?"

"I thought you were good at memorising every word I've said.", Yeonjun grinned at him.

Taehyun looked into Yeonjun's eyes and recalled the things Yeonjun had said a few seconds ago.

So he was scared. Scared to be alone at this astonishing place where it looked like a dreamy fairyland and Yeonjun being the mythical creature inhabiting this place. After what Taehyun felt last week he only knew too well how this place can be perceived as living here for a long time and how it can change to a horror freak show real fast.

But why Taehyun? Out of all these people he could have chosen, why him? Was it because he caught Taehyun waiting for him? Or because he was the only person in his age who actually believed this whole story? It would have been very weird if he befriended a little child because other than them, nobody believed such fairy tales. Or was it because of something else?

"I can't leave this place.", Yeonjun stated all of a sudden.

"So I'm stuck and you are the only one who is coming here every day.". Yeonjun stopped in his movement and let his thumb rest on Taehyun's fingers.

"And now that I have someone to talk to I don't want to spend my time reminiscing about being trapped with this annoying carousel forever."

"Ok, I promise I won't ask you about it anymore.", Taehyun assured him and squeezed his hand softly so he could caress his fingers again.

"Thank you.", Yeonjun thanked honestly and continued where he had left off.

"What do you want to talk about then?", Taehyun asked now, having no clue about what a ghost would want to talk about when not about their unpossible existence.

Yeonjun thought about it for a while and wandered with his eyes over the place. He observed the people around the carousel.

"What do you call a joke without a punchline?", Yeonjun then asked. Taehyun looked at him silently and put on a deadly serious face.

"You are right! Man, I thought you didn't know that one."

"You have the opportunity to talk to someone since who knows when and the first thing that comes to your mind is to tell a bad joke?"

"I'm nervous, okay? I have never gotten to the part where I can actually chat with someone, you Buzzkill.". Taehyun looked at him with an outraged gaze.

"Buzzkill? Please tell me where I killed something because your joke clearly did that first.". Yeonjun had to laugh at that.

"You are right, it wasn't a really good one."

"Then tell me another one so I can check if you are really that unfunny.", Taehyun requested, whereon Yeonjun just grinned happily.

"Ok, check that out: Have you been watching me? Because I wanted you to fall for my smile as hard as I fell for yours!"

"And now you are flirting with me."

"Can't I?", he asked, grinning widely. Taehyun couldn't help but to blush at that. An overflowing delightment came over him and he wanted to feel it with every fiber of his body.

"Do it again."

"What?", Yeonjun laughed a bit confused. A bit taken back by his sudden command spitting out of his mouth, Taehyun's face froze in an expectant gaze and just waited for Yeonjun to get what he was saying without having to explain it further.

"You want me to tell another joke or to flirt with you more?", he asked.

"Yes."

"Yes what?"

"Yes, please."

"No.", Yeonjun laughed at him and couldn't stop being so amused by this cute boy beside him.

"You are adorable.", he said with a wide smile, his eyes disappearing and now looking like a pure gummy bear.

Taehyun couldn't bear Yeonjun's smile without feeling it in some kind of way. With his eyes still wide open, he moved up his right hand to the sweet boy's cheek and touched it softly. His skin was soft and smooth and it felt like a marshmallow. Yeonjun's smile faded, perplexed by Taehyun's sudden touch but still feeling at ease. Taehyun's thumb stroking up Yeonjun's cheek, sensing every smooth part of it and circling up and down and doing it all over again so he could memorize the shape of it. Taehyun thought about it over and over again.

>It's so soft.<, he thought and his eyes glimpsed at Yeonjun's lips for a second. He couldn't resist himself, his thumb going down to the corner of Yeonjun's lips and starting to trace them slowly as if he needed to.

>It's even softer!<, he blurted out in his head and tried to stay calm but Yeonjun noticed his eyes getting bigger at the feeling of his lips.

"Your response to my compliment is to touch every part of my face?"

"You look like a round marshmallow right now, how can I not?"

Yeonjun slowly lifted up his hand and grabbed Taehyun's, which was still resting on his face and separated it from his cheek. He looked Taehyun softly in the eyes while holding onto his hand tightly and placed it down.

"You are distracting me.", he said then, not interrupting their glances with each other.

"And you are unfunny.", Taehyun snapped back.

"And you are cute."

"And you are-", Taehyun couldn't think of anything to say back.

"I am what?", Yeonjun smirked awaiting an answer.

Taehyun looked at him for a few more seconds until he got up from the bench they were sitting on and tried to calm himself down. His legs felt like jello and Taehyun didn't know how to handle these intense feelings without ramming his head against a tree. He needed to do something as soon as possible or he would go totally insane.

"Would you just excuse me for a second?", he asked Yeonjun without looking at him.

"You are coming back, right?", Taehyun heard him say with a little anxious subtone. Taehyun spun his head around so Yeonjun could see his honesty as Taehyun spoke:

"I'm always coming back. Trust me."

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The clock hit 5.53 pm. Taehyun thought about how he is going to stay awake today. One thing Yeonjun has told him about his appearance as a ghost was that he would disappear again at 12 o'clock at night and because Taehyun wanted to spend as much time with Yeonjun as he could, he wouldn't be home until after midnight. Still, when he had to study for an exam, Taehyun didn't miss the meeting with Yeonjun. When he came home after midnight, Taehyun didn't go to sleep but studied for his exam instead, resulting in a total of a two hour sleep, maybe even less. He couldn't judge if it was a good idea to do that or whether he should have just gone to sleep.

Taehyun just wanted to sit on a bench with Yeonjun beside him and talk about irrelevant things so that he didn't have to strain his head too much. But that idea was crushed not three seconds later when he saw Yeonjun standing discouraged in the middle of the walkway in front of the carousel.

"What's wrong, Yeonjun?", he asked the sad boy.

"Someone is sitting on our bench."

>Our bench.<, Taehyun recalled in his head and got a ticklish feeling of it.

>We got our own bench.<

Now both of them felt discouraged and Taehyun felt tired on top of it, which was double the amount of worse. He looked around the place and noticed that every bench was unavailable, which meant no sitting down for Taehyun. He sighed noticeably and Yeonjun looked over to the tired looking boy. After Yeonjun examined the other benches too, he had a great idea coming up.

"You see those little boys sitting on the bench behind us?", Yeonjun asked, whispering. Taehyun looked over his shoulder for a quick second and then turned his head to Yeonjun again.

"Yes, why?"

"Go to them and ask if we could sit there."

"They look like they will bite us.", Taehyun said hesitantly. Yeonjun just chuckled at his statement.

"They won't, now go."

Yeonjun gently pushed Taehyun to the direction of where the two little boys sat and unsure about what yeonjun had in mind, Taehyun went up to them and opened his mouth a bit, ready to say something.

Before Taehyun could even start his sentence, the little boys looked at him intimidated and nervously stood up from the bench, leaving this place with a quick run.

"Weird."

"You are quite intimidating.", came from behind.

Taehyun could feel the words touching his left ear and he knew that Yeonjun was standing very close behind him. He turned around in confusion and carefully paid attention to his heartbeat.

"I doubt that."

"You have just seen it yourself.", Yeonjun smiled and gestured to the now empty bench behind Taehyun.

Without saying any further, Taehyun sat down on the bench and exhaled in relief. Yeonjun did the same and joined Taehyun on their new 'Our bench'. He took a short glimpse of Taehyun only to realise how tired this small boy actually was.

"This bench is quite uncomfortable.", he started talking.

"Hm.", Taehyun just breathed out.

"Oh what a coincidence that there is an empty space right in front of me.". He tried to point to his thighs. Taehyun looked to the mentioned empty space and furrowed his brows.

"You want me to-"

"-lay your head on my lap, yes.", Yeonjun finished his sentence.

Taehyun just stared at Yeonjun's thighs, hesitated to actually lay his head down on his lap but still doing it at the end. His tiredness vanished all his worries and Taehyun let himself fully concentrate on this moment with him.

He felt more comfortable now laying on Yeonjun's lap and it felt like he was sitting on a heat cushion. Yeonjun was now able to take advantage of Taehyun's head laying on his thighs, so that he could admire his pretty face better. Slowly putting his right hand on Taehyun's chest, letting it rest there and embracing Taehyun more as he couldn't resist himself now that he was so near to him. Taehyun felt secure and needed no excuse to look at Yeonjun's face because he could hardly move away in the position he was laying in. Although Yeonjun wouldn't mind his staring, because he did the exact same thing too.

There came a moment where both of them were just looking at each other, not saying any words, nor doing anything in particular. Taehyun heard the slow breeze of the wind, the leaves flying in the sky and falling down on the ground. The trees rustling in harmony and the quiet buzzing of the carousel moving, in tune with the sound of the pigeons cooing, let Taehyun feel at ease. His senses concentrated on him and only him, all these other trivial things like the people talking being ignored completely. He wanted to perceive more insights from him, not just the sight of him but also the touch of him, the taste of him.

Taehyun slowly raised his right hand, led it to Yeonjun's arm and caressed it softly. He could feel the fabric of his pink crop top, it was soft and fluffy. Yeonjun only observed him attentively. He also wanted to touch Taehyun. He wanted to touch his soft looking skin and his beautiful looking nose. Without any further considerations Yeonjun calmly moved his hand, which was resting on Taehyun's chest a while ago, to his chin and placed his fingers there. Sensing the warm skin of this mesmerizing boy and his hand going up to Taehyun's cheek and caressing it softly, his thumb going back and forth giving Taehyun little goosebumps all over his body.

Taehyun felt tension building up in his chest. But it wasn't a negative tension. It was like a pleasant, tickling, tender tension. Something that wanted to burst out of his chest and transform into million shining sparkles, wandering around the carousel and floating over both their souls. He wanted Yeonjun to feel this, this explosion of happiness and utter euphoria. Maybe he felt that too? Perhaps Yeonjun was able to feel emotions that were outside the human spectrum. Maybe he could feel the stars emphasizing with their emotions, colliding with their longing for one another and tasting from their desire to be together for eternity. Things that Taehyun could only dream of, that he could only imagine.

While Taehyun was thinking all that, Yeonjun's hand made its way up to the bridge of Taehyun's nose and traced it gently. His index finger slowly following the line of his nose and when he got to Taehyun's nose tip, Yeonjun wandered the way back up, taking care of being especially tender with his touch so that Taehyun could feel every little thing very precisely.

It was like a collective exploration of one another. Both of them were busy touching the other's face and examining their structure and absorbing their warmth. Taehyun's left hand was placed at Yeonjun's right cheek and he was yet again following the shape of his lips with his thumb, thinking about their unique appearance. At some point his thumb didn't move anymore and just rested on Yeonjun's soft lips, which seemed more peachy pink than usual. Yeonjun gave his thumb a little peck, making Taehyun heat up radically, whereas Yeonjun just smiled delightfully.

Taehyun released his hand from Yeonjun's cheek and let it rest on his side.

"I like feeling your hand on my cheek.", Taehyun whispered honestly, not thinking about what he was saying. Yeonjun's smile widened.

"You are very honest with your feelings."

It was the first time for Taehyun to actually feel safe with someone so it wasn't a surprise that he revealed his honest thoughts to Yeonjun that easily.

"So why are you so tired today?", Yeonjun asked him now curiously.

"Math exam.", he explained.

"And I only had two hours to sleep."

"Why didn't you say anything, then we could have just postponed the date."

"Date? Is every day a date to you?"

"I mean yes, every day has a date.". Taehyun furrowed his brows in annoyance and Yeonjun just chuckled at his bad joke.

"You are still very unfunny."

"Someday I'll get you to laugh at my amazing jokes."

"The day will never come then."

Afar from their intimacy, a dog barked loudly and forcefully, making Yeonjun and Taehyun flinch at the sudden interruptance.

"Fucking hell, that scared the shit out of me.", Taehyun exclaimed startled.

"Do not insult dogs like that, they are precious little creatures that need to be protected at all cost."

"I didn't insult them. Why would I, I have a dog myself."

"You do?!", Yeonjun yelled excitedly, whereon Taehyun just flinched again at his sudden reaction.

"Scare me once again and I promise you I will punch you to the moon."

"Alright scaredy cat we got it. So why are you just now telling me that you have a dog?"

"Because I have never gotten the chance to bring it up?"

"Can you bring him some other time?", Yeonjun asked cheerfully and his face lit up more and more at the thought of meeting Taehyun's dog.

"I can do that."

"Show me a picture! Do you have a picture?", it gushed out of him.

Taehyun pulled out his cell phone from his pocket and opened the lock screen where he entered his password leisurely. Yeonjun's gaze met the back of Taehyun's phone and quietly observed his petite fingers clinging to it.

"What breed is your dog?"

"Welsh Corgi."

Yeonjun sat himself upright excitedly and his face turned into a more astonished expression.

"These are my favourite dogs!"

"Really? I mean to be honest I thought you were more the cat type."

"Why do you think that?", Yeonjun asked in disbelief and Taehyun looked up from his phone, looked him in the face and inspected him.

"Do you like foxes?", he asked all of a sudden and Yeonjun just huffed annoyed.

"Very funny."

Taehyun turned his attention back to his phone and searched his gallery for a good picture of his dog.

"What's their name?"

"His name is Fish Pancake."

"Fish Pancake?"

"Fish Pancake."

Taehyun turned his phone around so Yeonjun could look at the display to see a cute picture of Taehyun's Welsh Corgi.

"He looks like a Ben.". Taehyun furrowed his brow a bit.

"Do you know a Ben?"

"I know- knew someone who had it as his american name."

"Well... to me he looks like a Fish Pancake.", Taehyun said and put his phone away again.

"Promise me you will bring your dog with you one day.", Yeonjun said calmly.

"I promise."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After Taehyun met Yeonjun, he didn't really talk to the people from school anymore. He didn't actually know why he was talking with them in the first place. They didn't make him feel appreciated as Yeonjun did and they also didn't care about his interests. Taehyun thought they needed more time together to build a friendship, but he noticed that, after months of waving at them in the hallway, they never waved back but only laughed at him. Taehyun just thought he looked funny when he waved but he should have known better.

And when he waited in the park right in front of the blinking carousel and saw those people from school at Yeonjun's and his place, he didn't know if he should greet them. It was only a few minutes until Yeonjun would appear and Taehyun didn't want the people to meet Yeonjun. What if Yeonjun saw them laughing at him? Taehyun promised himself to not be embarrassing anymore.

One of the guys in the group turned his head around and recognized Taehyun a few meters away from them. Taehyun was standing there quite awkwardly and tried to look into the blue sky turning slowly orange as the evening gradually fell upon them. Taehyun knew they were here since he arrived there but acted like he didn't notice them yet.

"Hey, Kang Taehyun!", yelled one of them and grinned mischievously.

Taehyun couldn't ignore the yelling and looked over to them. Intimidated, he wished to just go home again, but he needed to stay for Yeonjun.

The group started coming over to Taehyun and they looked like aggressive Thugs ready to tease him once again.

"Heard you are coming here pretty often now.", said the tallest of the group.

"Someone said every day.", claimed another one of them. Taehyun just looked at them and didn't know how to talk.

"You aren't here because of that stupid shit we told you, aren't you?", the tall boy chuckled amused. Taehyun felt his chest getting tighter and tighter.

"Yeah, that would be totally weird.", the other boys laughed with him.

"No, I'm not.", Taehyun's voice quivered quietly.

"Yeah sure you do, don't lie to us."

"What a freak. I told you he likes twinks."

Taehyun wanted to go. He wanted to leave this place as fast as he could. Why are they doing this?

"I didn't think you would actually fall for something like that, Kang Taehyun."

It wasn't just a myth. It was real. They were the ones who were in the wrong but Taehyun couldn't say that. He just stood there, ashamed of how dumb he was for thinking these people were nice.

"I'm not here because of that.", Taehyun tried to explain once again but the people were just laughing at him entertained.

"You don't have to hide it, we know your little secret.", his smile beamed maliciously.

"How pathetic do you have to be to think a stupid myth can bring you a sweet little boyfriend."

The group bursted into a vicious laughter. Taehyun felt his throat filling up with sharp air, barely breathing and looking to the ground in embarrassment. His pain felt like million pungent tickles crawling up his arms and down his legs, gathering in his chest and slowly crushing his bones. His head droned and felt empty but also full of shame and anger and tears. Tears that won't come out of his eyes, there was only a dry feeling that made him sick. Taehyun had the urge to rip off a pipe from underneath the carousel and crush his own head open so that it can work right again. His rigidity made him feel worse and he wanted to do something, he wanted to say something but he couldn't get himself to do anything. Perhaps they would go away if he just stood there still and thought about something else. Maybe if these people acknowledged that they have done enough to torture him with their words, they would leave.

But they didn't. They were laughing and roaring and snorting and howling and they were loud and intense with their jokes and harassment towards him. They should stop. They should be quiet. They should leave and never come back.

Feeling his skin crumbling, breaking into pieces and falling to the ground was the last thing he felt before he heard a familiar voice that made him almost cry in relief.

"Get lost you punks! Another word out of your filthy mouth and I will make sure that you never speak again."

Taehyun wasn't sure if Yeonjun really was that scary to them, but these boys all had frightened expressions on their faces. They looked at him disturbed and Taehyun could see the uncomfortable feeling crawling inside their body's and almost coming out of their eyes.

"What in the hell.", a boy a little smaller than Taehyun whispered, seemingly terrified by what he is seeing right now.

"What kinda Freak Show is that shit?"

They began to step away little by little, afraid of the sight of the ghost behind Taehyun. The tallest of the group looked at Yeonjun and then to Taehyun and then back to Yeonjun with panic in his eyes and stumbled back in disbelief.

"You are such psychos, both of you!", he said and left the carousel place with all the others.

After they were gone, Taehyun still couldn't move an inch. He needed to digest the things that were thrown at him like sharp knives, needed to regain consciousness that he had lost. Yeonjun came closer to Taehyun and inspected him worriedly.

"Is everything okay?", he asked him softly but Taehyun still couldn't open his mouth.

Yeonjun now stood right in front of him and looked him in the face, his gaze expressed concern over him and his hand slowly made its way up to Taehyun's arm and stroked it gently. After Taehyun still didn't say anything, Yeonjun moved his hand to his cheek and caressed it softly, tenderly touching his cold skin that was red from his embarrassment.

"Were these the people from your school?"

"You were right.", Taehyun finally said, a huge burden falling off of his shoulders that pushed him down to the ground and narrowed him. Taehyun took a deep breath and he could feel the pungent tickle reducing itself more and more.

"I should have kept a distance between those stupid little assholes. I should have known that they were just laughing at me rather than liking me. I should have-", he took a deep breath again, a tickle going from his left eye down to his cheek.

Yeonjun gently wiped away the single tear rolling down Taehyun's face and looked even more worried now.

"It's okay Taehyun, you couldn't know."

"I could have. You even said it yourself."

"I know, but I didn't want to shove "I told you" in your face.". Taehyun let out a breathy chuckle at that.

"You laughed!", Yeonjun exclaimed happily and his face lit up.

"No shit, Sherlock."

"Hey, don't steal my words!"

Taehyun raised his head so he could look into Yeonjun's face, which was dangerously close to his. He looked so soft in this shiny light, the carousel illuminating his prominent features making him appear like a sparkling rock candy. His lips were still a bit drawn into a worried expression but Taehyun couldn't think of that but rather admired their smooth curves and their color like cherry bonbons. Or was it strawberry bonbons? Taehyun still didn't know which one it was and he wanted to find that out.

"Tell me another joke."

"Now?". Taehyun nodded dazed by his lips. He wanted to watch them move. He liked how they moved when Yeonjun talked or when he smiled.

"Ok then. What does a ghost love most?"

"What?"

"You."

Taehyun automatically averted his eyes from Yeonjun's lips and stared perplexed in his eyes. He didn't expect that, he just wanted to admire his lips moving because he liked that so much, but he definitely didn't expect that.

Yeonjun smiled at him warmly and full of love, love that he only had for Taehyun.

"Is it so funny that you aren't able to laugh?", Yeonjun asked him slightly chuckling.

"I think that was the worst joke I have ever heard."

Taehyun didn't know what to do. Did he mean that for real? What should he do? Taehyun wasn't able to move or to look away. He could only see Yeonjun's chocolate brown eyes and imagined what Yeonjun could say next.

Yeonjun laughed again. His full, refreshing laugh went through Taehyun's head and lit up thousands and millions of fairy lights dangling in his dream world. It tickled and made Taehyun's heart laugh at this flashing party going on up there.

"Can't handle a love confession, huh?"

"I can't handle you.", he said back, not realising his indirect confession. Yeonjun couldn't help it but laugh again.

"If you weren't such a brat I would have kissed you now."

"I'm not a brat."

"You aren't."

How does it feel to be kissed on the lips? Is it moist? Is it soft? Taehyun didn't know about it before. He imagined it as something sweet and delicate. And it was all of that. His lips touching Yeonjun's made the fairy lights in his head explode. Each one of them sparkled when they bursted out of their surface, little stars dancing around and crying and laughing at the same time. He couldn't handle his emotions and he didn't know what he felt. It was like a ton of different feelings colliding with each other and getting mixed up and creating a new shiny, sparkling galaxy inside his chest and whole body. It was as if the trees around them knew what was going on and cheered them on with rustling their leaves and swiveling with the wind.

Taehyun couldn't see Yeonjun but he could feel him. His plump, soft lips didn't taste like cherries or like strawberries. They tasted like raspberries, sweet with a little tart undertone which made the sweetness more refreshing. Taehyun also tasted a sort of floral note and it made him tickle and he wanted to taste more of Yeonjun's lips.

He pushed his lips a little harder against Yeonjun's, who didn't back off but rather embraced Taehyun's waist with his left arm and pulled him closer. His other hand, still on Taehyun's cheek, caressed him gently and consumed his soft skin.

Taehyun put his hands on Yeonjun's waist and he could feel his warm skin, it was squishy. His body heat touched Taehyun's hands and hugged them tightly, his thumbs moving up and down and giving Yeonjun little shivers on his tummy every now and then.

The feeling of pressing his lips against Yeonjun's over and over again was harder to resist and he knew it would be a tragedy if their lips would get separated. Taehyun kissed his upper lip which felt like a marshmallow but far more tender and smooth and moved his lips in the rhythm of Yeonjun's lip movements. His lips craved for the warmth that came out of Yeonjun's, the pulsation he felt and the soft sensuality he tasted from them. The yearning for touch and for love was immeasurable. Taehyun tried to lean forward, hold Yeonjun tight in his arms and keep him right next to his heart, forever.

Yeonjun's kisses were delicate and careful. Every Time he kissed Taehyun with immense pressure, Yeonjun made sure to give him a little kiss afterwards. A continuous switching of deep, heartfelt kisses and sweet, careful ones, which made Taehyun dizzy but not in a sick and awful way but rather in an excited and thrilled way.

One kiss, two kisses, three kisses Taehyun felt on his lips, another after another after another and it wouldn't stop. Both were in a trance and they held each other tightly so they wouldn't get overwhelmed by the strong desire of both their lips that longed for one another.

The movements of their lips got slower and the kisses slowly turned into small little pecks they gave each other alternated, because they didn't want to let go yet. Taehyun separated himself first and watched Yeonjun still having his eyes closed and processed what had just happened. He needed to smile at that sight of him not realising a single thing, although it should have been Taehyun, who would have needed to process that moment.

After a while, Yeonjun opened his eyes and looked at Taehyun with a relaxed and satisfied gaze. He noticed how Taehyun smiled at him and immediately smiled back, admiring his rosy red cheeks shimmering in the night.

"Was that your first kiss?", Yeonjun smirked at him playfully.

"Wasn't it yours too? Or am I not the first guy to kiss a ghost?"

"Well, you are certainly the first guy who acknowledged that I am one."

Taehyun furrowed his brows at that and questioned what Yeonjun had done in his existence before he knew Taehyun.

"Was I... good?", Taehyun asked then, whereas Yeonjun just smiled widely.

"You were perfect.", he said and gently caressed Taehyun's cheek.

Taehyun forgot that Yeonjun still had his hand on his cheek and his other hand around his waist, making him nervous. The sudden realization of Yeonjun being so near to him made Taehyun's blood rush through his veins, pulsating in his body like crazy.

But he couldn't really enjoy these massive feelings, because Taehyun felt like being in the middle of attention right now. Not because Yeonjun and him were standing in the middle of the carousel place but because several passersby were staring at them, some with wide open eyes and others just purely annoyed by the love they felt for each other. Especially little kids and teenagers were gawking at them with a disturbed and frightened gaze, not able to move a single muscle. Taehyun looked at them confused and after he realised what they were seeing, he softened his expression after furrowing his brows yet again.

"They can see you.", he said as a statement. Yeonjun also looked around them and noticed the many people staring at them, some of them already minding their own business again and others still not moving an inch in fear.

"Yeah, it would have been weird for you if people had seen you talking with the air all the time."

"But they can see you."

"Yes, I am aware of that. What's your point?"

"So they saw us... kissing."

"They sure did.", Yeonjun grinned proudly but Taehyun just stared in the void and had to accept the fact that he kissed a boy in public, where everyone could see them.

"Taehyun?"

Taehyun thought about what he is going to do now. What if someone from school saw them kissing? What if someone from the group of boys, who definitely weren't Taehyun's friends, earlier came back and catched them kissing? They already knew Taehyun's secret but they couldn't prove it before.

"Taehyun."

What if they tell it around the school and then more people knew about Taehyun's secret and then it wouldn't be a secret anymore and then he had to talk to his parents about that and Taehyun knew about his Dad's attitude towards this topic.

"Taehyun!"

"Yes?", Taehyun asked Yeonjun, getting snapped back to reality after hearing his name coming out of this beautiful being.

"Can you maybe stop moving your thumbs around, it's tickling me."

"Oh.". Taehyun stopped in his tracks and let his hands rest on Yeonjun's waist.

"Sorry."

"It's okay.", he assured him calmly.

"You know, you don't have to worry if anyone suspects anything. You can just say that you helped me inspect my face really closely because it's important for a school project."

"A school project about...?"

"Really attractive men."

"Sounds realistic.", Taehyun chuckled a bit.

"I love your indirect compliments."

Taehyun's eyes glistened at the sight of Yeonjun's face lighting up every time Taehyun said something. His cute smile melted Taehyun's heart like caramel, sugaring him with his sweet cheeks, which got more prominent when his lips went up. Taehyun thought that they looked like candy pops when Yeonjun had a big smile on his face. He observed Yeonjun's smile very carefully and noticed that his nose looked kind of smaller when he smiled with his mouth open and seeing his teeth made Taehyun's chest tingle in adoration.

Taehyun was excited and happy. He was happy to be with Yeonjun, to be in his arms. It made him happy that Yeonjun was happy and that he loved Taehyun's indirect compliments even if Taehyun didn't realize that they were indirect compliments. He felt some sort of a strong feeling that couldn't be described easily. He couldn't express it the way he wanted to, he wanted Yeonjun to know how strong his feelings for him were.

"I love you.", Taehyun said but he wasn't satisfied with that statement.

"I love you more than the word love."

[Take a little break to look at the incredible fanart by @/crxcis on Twitter !!!] (Please don't use it !)

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The clock hit 5.53 pm.

"I'm not doing that."

"Oh come on, why did you bring it up when you don't want me to read it?"

"Because you asked me what I did today and I just told you the truth.", Taehyun explained.

"I expected something everybody would answer, like listening to music or reading a book but you telling me that you wrote poems? Nah, that's way more interesting than all these things so read some to me."

"I wouldn't call them 'poems'. More like thoughts I wrote down, which coincidentally rhyme."

"That's exactly what a poem is.", Yeonjun stated.

"So are you going to read them out to me?"

"No."

Yeonjun pouted disappointedly and laid his head on the plastic horse's head. He was sitting on one of the horses on the glowing carousel and looked at the direction where Taehyun was walking slowly beside him. Taehyun wasn't on the carousel like Yeonjun was but simply followed him right next to him and watched Yeonjun riding with it relaxed. Taehyun couldn't think of how many times he went around the circling machine but he knew how many times Yeonjun smiled at him for doing the bare minimum.

"I'm sad, Taehyun. Do something.", he exaggeratedly pouted at Taehyun and his hands were dangling down his body making him look like a floppy ghost riding on a merry-go-round.

"What should I do?"

"Read me some of your poems. That would make me happy."

"You think you are so sneaky.". Yeonjun grinned caught.

"So you would rather see me sad than caring about my feelings?", Yeonjun asked playfully offended.

"I would rather go to hell than read you some of my things.". Yeonjun huffed even more offended but both of them knew that he didn't mean it for real.

"And I thought you loved me more than the word love.". Taehyun pinched his eyes shut and he could feel the heat coming up his cheeks.

"And I thought the ghost loved me the most. So if he really does he should respect my decision and stop being so annoying with it.", he snapped back and opened his eyes again, watching Yeonjun's reaction at what he said. Yeonjun stopped pouting at him and smiled cheerfully.

"I do.", Yeonjun said and Taehyun's cheeks burned even more.

"Kang Taehyun!", screamed someone from not so far away. Taehyun recognized this voice and a sharp, uncomfortable feeling overcame him.

Taehyun turned around to look at the taller one of them and watched him and his group of friends coming closer to the carousel. Taehyun stood there still and pushed these terrible feelings away that were about to take him over again. In the meantime Yeonjun had gotten off the plastic horse and stood on the steps of the blinking carousel behind Taehyun.

"Thought I would catch you here at that time.", he said.

"What do you want?"

"Woah, don't immediately drive out your claws, kitten.". The smirk on his face made Taehyun more angrier than the fact that he was here again just to bother him. The other boys standing behind him had a fearful expression on their faces as they looked past Taehyun. They didn't say anything but were too frightened by the sight of Yeonjun to even look him in the eyes properly.

Taehyun thought about why they were here again. He could see that they were afraid of Yeonjun so why did they come here again when they left this place in terror the last time they met him? Nobody would go back to a haunted house when they knew that it was haunted and that it made them anxious.

"No worries Kang Taehyun, we aren't here because of you.". He turned his eyes away from Taehyun and looked at Yeonjun.

"We wanted to have a little talk with your creepy boyfriend."

"Leave him alone.", Taehyun exclaimed annoyed. Yeonjun didn't say a word, he had a bad feeling about this whole situation.

"We have to ask him about his freakish appearance he is giving off. Probably just to fuck with us.". He took a step closer to Yeonjun and Taehyun stood closer between them.

"There's nothing wrong with his appearance. Just stop with this and leave now."

"You don't have to tell me what's wrong and what's not, he is clearly provoking us, this little bastard.". Yet again the tallest one turned away from Taehyun and spoke to Yeonjun now.

"You think you are very funny with this show you are pulling but I will tell you something: You can play that little horror game with someone else, but don't fuck with me, asshole!", he screamed at him in anger and Taehyun could feel his blood pulsating. He clenched his fists and looked at the tallest in pure fury.

"Shut the fuck up!", Taehyun yelled at him and the tallest looked over to Taehyun with a bit of a perplexed gaze on his face.

"Shut your filthy mouth with your obnoxious words and leave us the fuck alone! You think you are so cool with your nasty attitude and your constant harassment against everyone.". Taehyun felt relieved to finally open his mouth and say all the things he wanted to say for a long time now. His anger fully controlled his words, which shouldn't be a good thing but it was helpful in this moment.

"He hasn't done anything wrong so to bash at him for his normal appearance will just make you look stupid!"

"Normal? Are you blind?". Now he was provoking Taehyun.

"You really don't get it, huh?", he said. The taller one tilted his head a little further forward.

"Your little friend behind you looks like it's already Halloween!". Taehyun's strict gaze broke a little and he furrowed his brows a bit.

"What are you talking about?"

"Look at him! He looks like he just murdered someone."

Taehyun didn't want to believe him, he would believe Yeonjun but not this asshole. He could be lying to him again. What if he just wanted to tease him yet again because he knew how easily Taehyun believed every single thing? But still, why would he say something like that when it could be clearly proven wrong when Taehyun just looked over to Yeonjun?

Taehyun took a last glance at the head of the group before he hesitantly turned around to Yeonjun. There was blood streaming down his face and body, his clothes were soaked up with it, dripping down from his hands and to the ground. Yeonjun's cheerful appearance was all vanished at the sight Taehyun had of him now. How could he have missed that? Why was he seeing this now?

Taehyun stared at him with wide open eyes, his gaze locked on his body. It seemed like the blood came out of his head but there was no wound to see or anything similar. The wet and fresh blood was stuck in his pink hair, it poured slowly out of his ears and mouth and the blood coming out of his eyes made it look like he was crying. All his clothes were covered in blood, discolored his pants and soiled his whole top. The ground under him was blood speckled and turned more and more into a big blood puddle.

There was blood everywhere.

Taehyun felt his soul being trapped in this body that couldn't move. His eyes were glued on this terrifying appearance of him. Yeonjun didn't move either, he was just standing there with no expression on his face, only the dripping blood moving on his body. Taehyun couldn't see what Yeonjun felt right now, he didn't furrow his eyes in anger or look sad, he didn't even look anxious. Taehyun was greeted with a blank gaze on his face as if he had known that one day there would have come that moment where Taehyun would see his true self.

Taehyun felt uncomfortable and frightened but he didn't want to show it. Taehyun didn't want Yeonjun to see how he felt about all this blood, blood on his cheeks and blood on his forehead. He felt the need to run away, far away from this ghost that wasn't looking friendly anymore or happy or anything else that Taehyun knew him for. But Taehyun couldn't move, he didn't want to move. His instincts were screaming and yelling at him, but it wasn't just the fear that paralyzed his whole body but it was Yeonjun who he didn't want to leave.

It was a battle between the immense fear and the strong desire for Yeonjun. His love for him was blocking his thoughts and movements and he felt betrayed by him and he wanted to cry, cry his heart out and his anxiety. He didn't know what to do, he needed to clear his head, clear it from all this blood and tension and disgust. He was disgusted. He was disgusted with himself for feeling all these things for Yeonjun when he should have felt safe and happy and joyful. It was confusing. A dull roar filled his head and he couldn't see the shining, sparkling carousel anymore. It was all blurry and narrowed, a feeling of small sharp tickles giving Taehyun a shiver down the spine. He couldn't breath, he couldn't talk, he couldn't move. He was trapped in this moment, in this position, in this place.

"Told you."

Taehyun turned his head around and looked at the taller one with tears in his eyes and utter shock. His eyes pierced through his, making the taller one a bit startled by his reaction.

Taehyun didn't look at Yeonjun anymore. He didn't know if he could do that ever again. With a paralyzed gaze, Taehyun got himself to move again and went straight along the path, away from this place and away from them all. He cried more and more the further he got away from this place.

..................................................................

The bright screen dazzled his eyes but Taehyun didn't bother to look away. He read the article for the fourth time and when he finished reading, he put his hand on the mouse and scrolled to the beginning of the article to read it all over again. His gaze was glued to the headline of the article and examined every single word and put them together into a sentence and yet he still couldn't comprehend the context of it. Taehyun didn't want to.

>TEENAGER DIES IN TRAGIC ACCIDENT WITH A CAROUSEL<

Suddenly it all felt like a fever dream. Nothing made sense anymore and yet everything did. This whole time the people around them didn't saw a beautiful, candy-looking boy with a bright charisma like Taehyun did, they saw a blood covered ghost with the slight difference that they didn't know that he was a ghost but rather thought he was a terrifying creep for dressing like a teenager who died four years ago. It was all so obscure for Taehyun. He knew that Yeonjun couldn't be just some arbitrary apparition but the truth still hurted deep in his chest. It clenched through his heart and pushed his lungs together, making it harder for Taehyun to breathe.

An accident right there where both of them kissed each other. All this time they were at Yeonjun's place of death. He was trapped there with the thing that killed him. He couldn't leave the carousel yet alone the park.

The myth made all sense now. Taehyun had thought about it for the last 3 hours since he came home and it all made perfectly sense.

>But beware of this innocent looking boy as you might see eternal death in his eyes within.<, he recalled in his head slowly. Why didn't he think about that earlier? Looking into Yeonjun's eyes after seeing his bloody self made Taehyun see something lonely and dark in him. It was the death that was haunting him since he died, like a second soul that was trapped in his body and Taehyun could see it only with difficulty. He didn't know what made him different from everyone else because all the other people could see it from the very beginning but Taehyun only saw it just now, after a month of being with him everyday.

Maybe Yeonjun didn't want him to see his true self. Maybe he was scared that Taehyun would leave him when he would see the blood, because he did. He did leave after seeing it and Taehyun wanted to cry, he wanted to cry because he left Yeonjun alone. He was all alone there and Taehyun had abandoned him at the carousel.

He felt his chest getting tighter and tighter at the thought of Yeonjun standing there without Taehyun and thinking about what he did wrong. He didn't do anything wrong and that's why Taehyun was crying. He left him for a thing that he couldn't control, that wasn't his fault. He didn't died that day because he did something stupid, he died because that fucking carousel was defective. It tore Taehyun's whole chest apart by the image of Yeonjun waking up as a ghost, not knowing why everyone was ignoring him and not talking to him, not seeing him. He probably felt abandoned and alone and scared and Taehyun made him feel all those things earlier again. He hated himself for what he did and he wanted to go back but as he looked at the clock and saw that it was past midnight, he knew that it was too late.

He sobbed out loud. Taehyun cried while looking at the clock, thinking about what he did and how much he regretted it. He was sobbing irregularly, every third sob made him need to catch a breath because the feeling was too heavy and his lungs felt crumpled up. His eyes ached and got swollen, the tears felt like acid running down his face and dripped on his shirt. His cheeks hurted, the unpleasant pain cramped in them but he didn't do anything against it. Taehyun didn't want to do anything but cry his whole heart out. The pain was getting bigger and bigger and it was slowly devouring him into a place where he would only feel pain and misery and agony.

He wanted to feel it. He owed it to him.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The clock hit 5.53 pm and Taehyun almost let his phone fall on the ground because he was more focused on the majestic carousel in front of him rather than putting his phone back in his pocket safely. Taehyun wanted to go to him quickly but when he saw Yeonjun, he could only make little steps that brought him forward only slowly. He couldn't see any blood and Yeonjun looked like how he did as always, soft and pretty and not at all terrifying. But Taehyun still had this image in his head, the image of Yeonjun looking dead, the image that he had seen in the article where his whole body was covered and he could only see his bloody arm peaking out. His hand was covered with scratches and his pink sleeve soaked up with blood.

It was surreal for Taehyun to see him like that, to see him alive.

Yeonjun didn't look up yet. His eyes were piercing through the ground in front of him, sitting on the steps to the carousel and feeling guilty. It was Taehyun's shoes that made him look up after he saw them right before his sight. Yeonjun's expression changed to shock then to relief then to disbelief and lastly went back to guilt. Mixed feelings were buzzing through his head and expressed themselves in his face but Taehyun ignored that. It was difficult for him not to see the blood dripping down his body or coming out of his head and ears and eyes.

"I know...", Taehyun collected his words while looking Yeonjun in the face.

"I know, I promised you not to ask about it but I think that it is important for me to know the truth.". Taehyun waited for his reaction attentively. Yeonjun only widened his eyes but said nothing and Taehyun let out a deep breath afterwards.

"I read an article about you.". Taehyun watched Yeonjun carefully while saying every word slowly.

"You...died. In 2017.". He needed to furrow his brows and look away because he could feel his tears slowly coming up. Yeonjun needed to furrow his brows too, worried about what Taehyun felt right now.

"I'm sorry. I should have told you."

"No, I'm sorry.", he looked at Yeonjun again with pain in his eyes and pain in his throat.

"I shouldn't have left you yesterday. I'm sorry that I ran away."

"It's only natural for you to be scared. There is no need to think that it was your fault."

"It wasn't your fault either.", Taehyun exclaimed, his lungs tightened and he couldn't breathe properly.

"I know.". Yeonjun stood up from the steps and looked Taehyun right in the eyes now on an equal footing. His hand slowly made his way to Taehyun's, touching his fingers tenderly and feeling his warmth.

"Tell me what happened."

Both of them had pain in their eyes. Nobody wanted this conversation but it was important and they both knew that. Taehyun couldn't bear with the thought of Yeonjun going through all that pain and suffering and Yeonjun felt sorry for not telling Taehyun the truth and making it harder for him to accept it, now that they know each other for a longer time.

"I was just here with my friends. We wanted to hang out and do things everyone does when they are alive.", Yeonjun began to tell.

"Beomgyu thought it would be funny to take a ride with that...". He tilted his head a bit to the carousel behind him.

"We thought it would be funny.", he laughed but it was painful. His throat began to burn and he looked down to their hands and watched them touching each other every now and then. He could feel how soft Taehyun's skin was and how petite. Taehyun's eyes still lingered on Yeonjun's face, listening to his voice attentively.

"Kai didn't want to ride with us so me and Beomgyu were the only ones on there. It was when he noticed something off and said to us that we should come down but we didn't listen.". Yeonjun stopped at the thought of what happened back then, he didn't think about it for a long time. Every word felt like sharp knives going up his throat and coming out as a quiet voice, which only Taehyun could hear from this distance.

"I can only remember the pain in my head. Something must have fallen on me. I couldn't see anymore but I could hear Beomgyu and Kai screaming and yelling. I don't know what they said, I couldn't understand them."

Now Taehyun was holding onto his hand tightly. He didn't move or looked away but simply wanted to be there for him right now. Yeonjun still didn't look up into Taehyun's face, his eyes staring at their hands intertwining and the pain sucking up his energy to speak.

"I thought it was just a huge joke when no one noticed me, when everyone ignored that I was talking to them.".

He could feel the tears tickling his cheeks but he didn't bother to wipe them away. His sight got blurry and he felt the cold pain shivering down his body and up his arms. Taehyun didn't know what to do and only held his hand more tightly, rubbed his palm delicately and thought about a way to calm him down.

"They were crying. Beomgyu and Kai were crying and I couldn't do anything. I yelled at them and said that I am here but they didn't see me. I didn't know how I could let them see myself back then.". Yeonjun stopped for a moment again to swallow the pain that was shredding his throat into little pieces.

"And I didn't know how either when they came here every day to mourn me."

His lips began to quiver and more tears came out of his eyes. The pain gathered in his throat and made it hard for him to speak or to breathe. He furrowed his brows in exertion.

"At some day they didn't come anymore. And the last time they heard me and saw me was when I was still alive."

Yeonjun couldn't bear the pain in his throat anymore and the suffer in his head. It was like a pressure that exerted itself in him and wanted to blow up himself. His eyes burned and his whole face hurt. Yeonjun's body felt weak, all his energy was absorbed by the pain and the heaviness of it dragged him down.

Taehyun pulled him into a hug and held him as tight as he could. He made sure that Yeonjun felt comfortable and safe. Yeonjun slowly wrapped his arms around him and sobbed quietly into the crook of his neck, the pain raining down at him and pumping through his veins.

Taehyun's thumbs caressed Yeonjun's back softly and rubbed it gently to make him feel at ease, his head laid on his shoulder and he sometimes moved his cheek back and forth so he could feel the fabric of Yeonjun's crop top on his skin. Taehyun could sense Yeonjun's cold skin and tried to rub it warm with his hand but it only gave him more goosebumps.

Meanwhile Yeonjun was touching Taehyun's grey jacket carefully and embraced it tightly. He held Taehyun close to him and didn't want to let him go. He didn't want to let go of something that he loved the most, not again. He didn't want to lose him. He wanted to hug him and kiss him and feel his skin and his lips. He wanted to talk to him every day and tell him bad jokes and flirt with him so he could see Taehyun's cheeks going red.

Yeonjun needed to cry even more because Taehyun was hugging him so tightly as if he wanted him too. He was happy that he had someone to talk to and someone who he could touch and embrace. It felt so relieving.

..................................................................

Yeonjun still looked a bit dazed after he sobbed quietly into Taehyun's shoulder and let out all the pain he had kept to himself for four years. Yeonjun was sitting at the steps of the carousel again with Taehyun sitting right beside him and a worried expression on his face. Taehyun slowly raised his right hand to Yeonjun's cheek and wiped away the remaining tears on it. He tried to ignore the soft and smooth feeling of his skin and focused more on Yeonjun's well being. His cheeks were still very wet from the tears and Taehyun had to stroke his thumb across his cheek several times to wipe them all away and he tried to be very gentle with it to not irritate Yeonjun.

"I like feeling your hand on my cheek.", Yeonjun whispered barely audibly.

"Don't steal my words."

"You did it too."

Yeonjun couldn't stop but to try to release the tension like he always did. It wasn't that easy for Taehyun as it was for Yeonjun but his attempts worked and the pressure on them slowly decreased.

"Thank you for telling me. I know that it was difficult for you."

"I needed to. First I didn't want to tell you so I lied and said that I didn't know about my life before I was...dead."

Taehyun remembered the conversation they both had at the beginning. He promised Yeonjun afterwards that he wouldn't ask him about his existence anymore but he was still curious about all those things. The question was what Yeonjun knew and what he lied about that he supposedly did not know.

"So you know why you are here and who you are. And I suppose that we both think that you are some kind of ghost or an impossible existing mythical creature."

"I'm very possible or else i wouldn't feel your hand still on my cheek.". Taehyun let go of Yeonjun's cheek and felt his own cheeks filling up with heat.

"Sorry."

"This wasn't a complaint.", Yeonjun added and grinned a little.

"But yes, these were the things that I kept from you."

"And that you only appear at 5.53 pm-"

"That's when I died."

"Yes.", said Taehyun slowly.

He played around with his hands while looking at Yeonjun attentively, memorizing every little detail again and again so he wouldn't forget his beautiful face. In the meantime Yeonjun was staring at his knees and processed his thoughts that were buzzing around in his head like million ravens, squawking loudly.

"But why do you always disappear at midnight?"

"I don't know, maybe because then it's ghost hour?"

"Ghost hour is at 3 am and even if it was at midnight, wouldn't you then appear rather than disappear?"

"I don't know! Taehyun, you are asking me questions that are above my knowledge of supernatural anomalies. I can't even do fractions, my knowledge is too limited for this.", Yeonjun blurted out exaggeratedly. Taehyun just laughed at that amused.

"Why are you laughing?", Yeonjun asked confused, still with that exaggerated tone.

"You sound funny when you talk like that."

"Oh so that's funny, huh? You don't laugh at my jokes but laugh at my voice, great humor you have."

"Maybe try telling your jokes that exaggeratedly, perhaps then they would start being funny.". Yeonjun turned his head to Taehyun slowly and glared at him angrily.

"Another word and I will-"

"You will what?", Taehyun purposely teased him so he could see Yeonjun's nose scrunching up and Yeonjun's cheek becoming even rounder as he put on an annoyed face.

"You are testing my patience."

"I am.", said Taehyun honestly and didn't make a face, just stared at him blankly. He couldn't resist the urge to touch his cheeks and he wanted to drive his thumb over Yeonjun's lips and feel their softness on his skin.

"You are honest with your actions, I respect that. That deserves a reward, don't you think?", Yeonjun stated now and knew exactly what Taehyun was going for.

"Yes, maybe.", Taehyun only mumbled very quietly and stared at Yeonjun's lips.

Yeonjun tilted his head forward and gently put his lips on Taehyun's. Although he knew what was coming, Taehyun was still taken back by the sudden meet of his soft lips. His body filled with sprinkling and sparkling excitement, flowing through his veins and embracing his heart tightly. In his chest exploded million fireworks dancing and jumping through his body and spreading warmth and joy everywhere.

He wanted to feel more of the softness and warmth and pressed his lips more on Yeonjun's. Kissing every part and every corner of his plump lips and moving along the rhythm as Yeonjun did, made Taehyun feel like he did the first time they kissed. Soft and tender and warm and raspberries, he felt everything at once. A perfect combination of all those things let Yeonjun taste exactly as he looked. Soft and soft and more soft were his lips kissing Taehyun's and Yeonjun gave him small kisses in between the long ones again and again. Taehyun didn't know which he liked most but he knew that he liked him. Him and his round, soft cheeks and his pretty, chocolate brown eyes and his pink, fluffy hair. He liked kissing him and he liked being with him.

"I love you.", Taehyun then said.

"More than the word love?"

"More than anything."

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Taehyun ignored the outer world and wandered around in his mind. He was at the park earlier than he usually was and stared at the steps of the carousel. There they sat the other day, Yeonjun still had a few tears on his cheeks and Taehyun calmed him down and told him that everything is going to be alright and that he is there for him, when in fact Taehyun knew that it wasn't true. He was there for him at that moment, but he couldn't be there for him forever and Taehyun knew that. He knew it from the very beginning.

Because of that reason he actually went to the park in the first place and sat down on their old bench and listened to the hum of the trees, which the wind slowly made whisper in the afternoon light. The trees didn't whisper today but rather sighed in a loud rustle as if they were imitating Taehyun's emotions. In fact, Taehyun couldn't cry anymore. He didn't know if it was because he had cried in his bed the other nights before, or because it was still unreal to him.

It was something that he didn't want to address, that he didn't want to talk about with Yeonjun. He would be angry and sad but Taehyun thought it would be the only good time to tell him that.

And when the clock hit 5.53 pm he knew that it would be the last time for him to sit on their bench.

"Did you wait for me?", grinned Yeonjun happily and sat beside Taehyun. Seeing him unaware of what Taehyun was about to say and do, he almost immediately cried. He didn't know it yet and Yeonjun thought it would just be like the other days, full of love and both excited for the next day to come so that they could see each other again. It slowly made Taehyun's heart shatter. Piece by piece it fell apart, every moment of Yeonjun and him destroyed by the actions of Taehyun.

"What's wrong? Do you need a cheery joke? I thought about some the other day!", Yeonjun exclaimed joyfully and Taehyun slowly couldn't bear it anymore. He hated himself for seeing Yeonjun so happy, so innocent. It was torture.

"No but really, what's wrong? Is everything okay?", he then asked seriously and reached for Taehyun's hand that he held gently.

"Nothing is okay."

Yeonjun still waited for Taehyun's declaration and he only sighed at that. If he would talk now then tears would come out of his eyes and Taehyun wanted to prevent that.

"I... didn't tell you something."

"What is it, Taehyun? You can talk to me."

His words were like acid buzzing through Taehyun's body. His voice and overall behaviour made it so much more difficult to just speak out the truth.

"I can't see you anymore."

"What do you mean?"

Now Yeonjun was a bit taken back by Taehyun's words. He loosened the grip on Taehyun's hand and stared at him confused.

"Are these assholes at it again?"

"It's not because of them."

"And then because of whom?"

"Because of me."

Taehyun breathed in slowly and looked over to the carousel. It was glowing and sparkling and chiming, not at all like Taehyun felt right now. The carousel seemed as if it was happy, happy that it could have Yeonjun to itself again, happy that it could isolate and trap him again in this small place forever. It made Taehyun sick.

"I'm moving.", Taehyun said straight forward.

"Moving, like to another neighbourhood?"

"Moving to another country."

Yeonjun remained silent and said nothing. Looking at his face, Taehyun could see that he didn't get it.

"I can't come anymore.", Taehyun said again but Yeonjun still looked at him with wide open eyes and processed his words very slowly.

"You mean you can't come every day anymore?"

"Yeonjun.", Taehyun felt his throat tighten as he said that.

"Yeonjun, I can't come anymore at all."

His lips were quivering now and the more he spoke, the more tears made their way to his eyes. Yeonjun couldn't understand all this nonsense, he stopped holding Taehyun's hand and bent back a little.

"Why, when? When are you going to move? Next month? In a week?"

"Tomorrow."

Yeonjun realised. He realised what was happening and everything was crashing before his eyes. He heard the chime of the carousel and it got louder and louder, it ravaged his mind and his thoughts and this whole place. It fell on him like a shiver of uncomfortable tickles biting through his inner and giving him the feeling of dizziness.

"You are lying."

"I am not."

Yeonjun looked to the carousel with a paralyzed expression. He kept his eyes wide open to prevent his tears from falling, his face getting all red and his lips trembling in shock.

"When... since when do you know that?"

"Since I first met you.". Yeonjun let out a shocking breath and his eyes quickly moved back and forth, searching for something to hold onto or anything else that isn't slowly turning dark or disappears. He thought about what he should do now. Yeonjun couldn't prevent that, he was just a ghost, not alive. He could hold Taehyun and stop him from leaving but that would only last until midnight when he disappears again. Yeonjun felt helpless.

"Why... why didn't you tell me beforehand?". Yeonjun's voice was trembling and he needed a lot of effort for his words to come out clearly. He avoided Taehyun's gaze and stared at the ground, his face having a confused expression, but Taehyun saw more than confusion in his eyes when he glanced at him for a quick second. He was in pain and tried to cover it up with anger but Taehyun didn't know if Yeonjun was angry at him or at himself.

"I didn't tell you sooner because I didn't want it to affect our dates."

"So now you are telling it at the last second so I couldn't prepare to be without you again.". Taehyun looked at him realising how Yeonjun felt right now, a single tear streaming down his left cheek and leaving wet traces that dried quickly after. Taehyun thought Yeonjun would be worried about being alone again but Yeonjun was more worried about not seeing Taehyun again, which was much worse for him. He expected this issue to be worse telling it now, when both of them have such strong feelings for each other, but Taehyun couldn't imagine it to be that worse.

"I didn't want you to think about it every time we see each other.", Taehyun tried to explain it but he didn't really understand that nonsense either.

"You are selfish.". A sharp sting went through Taehyun's heart. Yeonjun was angry at him and he had every right to be.

"You knew it the whole time and you prepared yourself for that moment to come and now you are leaving me with all that alone. You were able to prepare yourself while still being here with me and I have to do all that on my own now.". Yeonjun started to cry too, several tears fell down on his hand resting in his lap and he still didn't look Taehyun in the eyes.

"I'm sorry."

"What should I do without you, Taehyun? I have no one but you and I couldn't even think about the things I wanted to say to you when you leave one day. I knew you would leave me one day but not that early, not now."

"I'm sorry.", Taehyun quivered and furrowed his brows strained because he couldn't bear the pain in his chest. He could only apologize, he didn't know what else to say.

Now Yeonjun looked up from the ground and looked into Taehyun's face. It was filled with tears and regret and he felt sorry.

"I'm sorry that I acted so selfish, I should have mentioned it sooner. I'm sorry that you couldn't prepare for this moment and that it's too late now. I'm sorry that I gave you that pain that you have to overcome on your own now. I'm sorry.", Taehyun whispered at the end and the pressure of his tears grew stronger and it became harder to hold them in.

Yeonjun felt the need to calm him down, to comfort him, to tell him that it was okay but it wasn't. He didn't get himself to even hold his hand or do anything else, he just stared at him and watched his tears coming out of his eyes bit by bit.

"What if you come here once every month?", Yeonjun then asked, a bit hopeful.

"Yeonjun."

"Or once every two months? It's okay, I could bear with that. Then I have enough time to think about jokes I could tell you, jokes that would make you laugh."

"Yeonjun, please stop."

"And then I have enough time to think about new ways to flirt with you so I can see your cheeks getting red. I love when your cheeks get red", he whispered at the end.

"Yeonjun, stop it.", Taehyun's throat hurt more and more and his sight was all blurry from the tears coming out in droves.

"Then visit me once every four months, I don't care. I can wait that long, I've been waiting my whole life. I've been waiting for it to come to an end and since I've met you, I'm not waiting for it anymore. I only wait for you. I just want to see your face, your smile, you furrowing your brows. I just want to hug you when you are here and kiss you until you look red like a strawberry. I want to talk about your day and listen to your voice."

"I can't!", Taehyun sobbed loudly to shut Yeonjun quiet. Yeonjun cried silently and couldn't prevent his tears from falling no matter how often he wiped them away.

"Why?", Yeonjun whispered barely audibly. Taehyun looked at him with a sorry gaze.

"Because then I couldn't get myself to leave again."

Taehyun knew that it would be difficult for him and for Yeonjun. He knew that if he came back here again, he wouldn't be able to leave Yeonjun one more time. It wasn't possible. And the only way was to never see him again, which hurted more than anything else.

Yeonjun stayed silent and looked at Taehyun with an expression that wanted Taehyun to change his mind. He contored his face and cried quietly, his hands still in his lap, making himself as small as possible.

"But I didn't even get to meet your dog."

Taehyun let out another sob at that. It was unfair. It was unfair for him to be in love with a ghost. It was unfair for Yeonjun to be a ghost. It was unfair for both of them that they needed to separate at some point. It was unfair for their love to be trapped in this place with this carousel forever.

"You promised me that you would bring your dog."

"I know."

"You said you will always come back, Taehyun. You lied."

"I know, Yeonjun.". It was painful. It was so painful and looking back at all the things Taehyun said, he knew that he couldn't keep all of his promises. None of them.

"But we still have time.", Taehyun whispered and tried to sound hopeful. Yeonjun's gaze wandered to the ground again, his tears streaming down his face silently.

"We still have time to hold hands and to look into each other's eyes and caress each other's cheeks. We can still feel that ticklish feeling, rushing through our bodies when we hear each other's voices.", Taehyun listed all the things that made him happy that he could only do with him.

"We can still kiss each other."

"You are hurting me.". Yeonjun couldn't listen to the things he said. It ripped his heart apart and drowned him, suffocated him.

"Your words hurt me."

"But it's the truth. The truth hurts and I can't keep it to myself any longer. I want to tell you all the things that were going through my mind the last few weeks. How much I love your soft, rosy lips which taste like raspberries and your chocolate brown eyes which always sparkle when you look at me. I love your stupid jokes, which are really bad but I love them. You always try to make me laugh when you know that I won't laugh at these terrible jokes. And I love your hair, it looks like cotton candy and I want to touch it so badly, it looks so fluffy. Your cheeks are so soft and squishy, if I could I would caress them forever.". Taehyun ignored the stinging pain in his throat and cried all his heart out, all his love for Yeonjun and he tried to tell him everything he could because it was the last time he could do that.

"I loved every second I was with you. You were my only friend who I could talk to and feel comfortable around. You were the only one who acknowledged me and liked me and wanted me. I love you, Yeonjun. With every part of me."

"Stop Taehyun, I don't want to hear all this."

"But you do."

Yeonjun sobbed quietly and thought about all the things he wanted to say but he couldn't form any words and it upset him. It was the last chance to tell Taehyun how much he loves him but his mind went all black. He cried and cried. He felt helpless, couldn't hold onto something, didn't have any words or things coming up and the only thing he could do was sob.

"I don't know- I don't know what to tell you.". Yeonjun was trapped in an empty hole without any way out.

"I can't think of anything. My head is empty and I can't think of anything. I want to tell you so many things but I can't get my head to work.". Yeonjun got overwhelmed and felt despair.

"It's okay, take your time."

"No Taehyun, there is no time.", Yeonjun said furiously. His cheeks felt sticky because of his tears getting soaked up by his skin. He had a headache and it hurted. His whole body hurted and his heart hurted. It all hurted.

Taehyun slowly raised his hand and wiped Yeonjun's tears away. He should have done that earlier. He wanted Yeonjun to calm down so he could think calmly. It was Taehyun's fault that Yeonjun couldn't prepare himself for that so now it was his job to help him get through this easier.

It was painful for Taehyun too but Yeonjun wasn't alive, he was a ghost. He doesn't age and will forever be in that state he is now. He can't leave this place and he isn't able to go to Taehyun if he wanted to. Taehyun knew that Yeonjun felt helpless and wanted to help him.

..................................................................

The time flew but it felt like it had stopped when it hit 5.53 pm. Taehyun couldn't remember what happened at this time but he knew that it wasn't long until it was midnight. He was scared. He didn't want to lose him, his only love. Watching Yeonjun sitting there all caught up with his thoughts made Taehyun miss him even though he was right there. Sweet like a lollipop, his lips shimmering as if they were candied and his hair soft like cotton candy. Sitting there with his pink crop top, glittering in the night light.

Not long until Yeonjun was gone, not long until Taehyun needed to go. How can he resist himself to not go to the carousel at 5.53 pm? How is he going to live without Yeonjun?

"You said you had some new jokes for me. Tell me a joke.". Taehyun remembered what Yeonjun once said. That someday he will laugh at his jokes and Taehyun wanted to laugh, even if it wasn't funny. He wanted to make him happy, even just a little bit less sad.

"Fuck those jokes."

Yeonjun pressed his lips onto Taehyun's without further explanation and kissed him passionately, moving his lips slowly in an arbitrary rhythm that Taehyun couldn't seem to find a pattern. He pushed all his emotions on Taehyun's lips and let him feel all the confusion and longing that exploded in his mind right now. Yeonjun didn't kiss him like he usually did. His kisses were strong and unpredictable but still soft and gentle as always. He placed his hand on Taehyun's right cheek and pulled him closer to his face. He wanted to be as close to him as possible, wanted to taste his sweet lips and feel everything of him.

Taehyun could feel Yeonjun's other hand making it's way up to his waist, crawling under his jacket to feel the warmth and the closeness to him. There he continued pulling Taehyun closer to himself and embraced him tightly. Taehyun didn't know what he should concentrate on, Yeonjun's hands caressing his cheek carefully as if he was made out of glass and rubbing his back gently giving him a shiver down his spine or Yeonjun's lips that kissed him tenderly and then roughly and then roughly again. There were no small kisses in between the long ones, there were only the long kisses which were yelling and crying.

Yeonjun kissed Taehyun like he felt in his chest and head, a disaster of all the various emotions and thoughts that he had. He wanted to speak out his feelings, wanted Taehyun to feel how much he loves him, how much he wanted him to stay. Every kiss was a love confession, a memory that he shares with Taehyun, a touch that he only has with him, every little word Yeonjun wanted to say he expressed it with kisses and touches.

Both knew that it would be the last time. The last time to kiss, to hug, to be with one another. And that didn't stop them from crying. Tasting their tears that streamed down their cheeks, letting them flow down their faces and falling down on the ground. They shared every little thing with each other, every emotion, every touch, every moment. They felt anger and sadness, happiness and desire but mostly they felt love, love for each other.

It hurted. To let go of each other, feeling the coldness rushing through them, the space between them growing bigger and bigger. It was painful. Taehyun looked into Yeonjun's face and saw nothing but pain.

"You know I love you.", Yeonjun whispered, his thumb caressing Taehyun's cheek slowly.

"I know, Yeonjun."

"And you know that I will always wait for you."

"I do.", Taehyun quivered. His words made him cry again.

"I will wait right here. At our bench. And when you come then I will have the greatest joke for you and only you. You will laugh because it's so funny."

"I will laugh. I promise you.", Taehyun tried to smile but it only made his tears fall down his face faster.

"You are bad at promises, don't do that.", Yeonjun laughed and wiped his tears away.

"I love you, Yeonjun.", Taehyun sobbed and wanted to say it again and again.

"More than anything?"

"Yes.", he whispered.

That was the last thing he said to him as midnight struck and Taehyun was the only one left sitting on their bench.

Taehyun stared into the distance where he sat just a while ago, not moving, not doing anything. And then he realised. And when it hit him it felt like the worst pain that he ever felt. It crushed his lungs and his heart, constricted his throat and left no space to breathe. The cramps all over his body and the headache he got from sobbing, quickly tore him apart. His tears burned traces on his cheeks and the soreness of his throat tortured him with the feeling of emptiness crawling inside him and poisoning him.

He was gone and the only thing Taehyun could do was cry. He sobbed loudly and his tears streamed further down his face and it didn't stop. His whole body shivered and his heart was full of pain and him. Taehyun only thought about him and he didn't want to admit that he was gone now and that he wouldn't see him again.

Clutching onto the bench made Taehyun realise that it wasn't a dream and that it never was a dream. It was real. His pain, his love, he.

He was real. Yeonjun was real.

///

You can find the spin-off of this story under the name 'You and I in the setting sun' on my account ! The spin-off is about BeomKai and how they cope with the loss of their best friend as they struggle with their own problems until they visit the place where they last saw Yeonjun, at the carousel.