A/N: Not particularly happy with this chapter but it was necessary somehow. May it help distract you from this frankly painful season, still a few races to go. We never stop believing...
Hope you enjoy it!
"What if I fly in? I could go to Switzerland for a couple of days."
"No, you are not flying anywhere," Sebastian replied sternly, disapproval stamped all over his face on the screen of Stella's iPhone, complete with a pointed finger in her direction. "You are staying in Brighton and finishing your exams."
She huffed. Normally, Stella would be seething at being scolded as if she were a child but after listening to a long rant, as Sebastian waited at the airport for his flight home, she decided not to argue.
As predicted, the purpose of the team meeting following the collision between the two Ferraris in Interlagos hadn't exactly been only to go over the data. Both drivers apologised - and none of them meant it. Behind the dimples and innocent looks, on track Charles certainly seemed as obstinate and ruthless as Sebastian.
To make matters worse, the German had been upset ever since Mattia Binotto postponed the debrief post-race until mid-week. Staying in Maranello upon arriving from Brazil would be the logical thing to do instead of flying back and forth, but unfortunately that clashed with the plans to pick up his daughters on Monday morning, who also happened to be both a little under the weather.
Stella didn't understand why he wouldn't raise the issue with his team principal, there was no way they wouldn't know the impact certain decisions could have on the life of someone with young children after all. But Sebastian claimed to be in no position to negotiate a different arrangement after what happened over the weekend. His absolute refusal in addressing it with the management stunned her, until a sneaky suspicion started nagging at her - that maybe he simply didn't fully trust them to keep his private affairs private.
Apparently Sebastian's ex had work commitments herself in Berlin and he was adamant about not asking her favours, no matter how hard it made his own life. In the end, his parents came to his rescue, driving from Heppenheim early in the morning to take care of their granddaughters while he remained in Italy.
Bit by bit, as she became more familiar with aspects of his life that she had not been privy to before, Stella had to admit it was pretty impressive how mature Sebastian and Hanna were. They remained on good terms and, although it required effort on both sides to make it all work, organisation and planning seemed to come almost effortlessly. Maybe it was just German DNA, she decided, attempting to shrug off a little jealousy.
"Are you okay, love?"
He sighed. "Yeah. It's all good."
The season was not going well and he was clearly pretty worn out but not once did he show any sign of wanting to back down. Sometimes she wished she lived closer but on campus for the final exams, she would concede that not losing focus was critical. Stella was confident, though, and at some point she realised he was actually more nervous than her.
"I'm sorry I haven't confirmed about your friend's wedding yet." Another sigh. It required switching a couple of things in his schedule and there had been no chance to go over it with Britta yet. Stella had a trip lined up to Switzerland after the last race in Abu Dhabi but they could postpone it for a week if he managed to squeeze in Ryan and Noah's wedding in his schedule.
"No worries, take your time." She couldn't help herself, though, and she gave him her best puppy dog eyes. "Come on, Seb. Thailand... beach wedding... no suits! You know you want to."
"I can't say no," he shook his head in defeat, his face breaking into a smile. "You smile at me like that and there's nothing I can do, I just can't say no, you see?"
Stella's cheeks warmed as if it was summer sun hitting her directly.
~~/~~
December was approaching fast and, with it, the realisation of a dream: Stella nailed her exams and successfully finished her ATPL Theory course. After earning her private pilot certificate a few years before, she was now the proud holder of a license to fly commercial aircrafts.
It was the reward of not just a year of hard work and massive commitment, but of personal investment that changed her forever. The license, while a goal in itself, was only another step for a career and it would remain frozen until she reached 1.500 flight hours. Hour building would come with any small jobs she could find with her additional qualifications but, mainly, by becoming a certified flight instructor. The experience that came with it would be invaluable, too, and could make all the difference once she had conditions to apply for a job with an airline. The course itself, due to start in January and for which she had enrolled at the same time as the ATPL, was demanding but it wouldn't take more than a couple of months to finish since she already possessed the other requirements.
She'd started browsing for jobs to send applications, too. She would be happy to remain in the UK - secretly, she was hoping one of her instructors would recommend her to a school - but moving to the United States or anywhere else in the world was a no brainer if the opportunity arose.
She hadn't yet managed to do a proper end of course celebration, as it was recent news, but Stella was so ready to get smashed and the trip to Thailand would be the perfect setting. The days leading up to the wedding, acclimatising and finishing preparations for the big event, would be a well deserved mini-holiday with friends. She was looking forward to leaving rainy London behind to enjoy fine white sand beaches surrounded by palm trees and explore noisy, open-air markets by day - and lose herself in the lively, legendary party scene by night.
The grooms were dear friends that she was proud to have in her life.
Ryan, a short brunet with a sturdy physique and kind eyes, was one of the very first people Stella befriended after moving to London several years before, the two meeting at the gym where he was a dance instructor; his partner Noah, a lanky blond, was a senior consultant for an international firm based in Hong Kong. Their paths had crossed one New Year's Eve in a party and the rest, as they say, was history.
The guest list was short. Noah's family did not take it well when he came out as gay and they'd been estranged ever since; there were only a couple of cousins attending. Ryan, on the other hand, had a supportive family and so his parents and sisters were present, as well as brothers-in-law and nephews, together with other relatives. Close friends of the couple, including a few that frequented the studio that Ryan had recently opened, had flown in; others were unable to make it. In total, there were about thirty guests.
When she confirmed her attendance a couple of months before, never in her wildest dreams could Stella have imagined bringing a plus one. Ryan in particular had been thrilled when she brought it up and they insisted on sending Sebastian an invitation.
Sebastian, who was currently in Abu Dhabi to wrap up the season, would only be able to fly over in a couple of days, after the race, but he'd be there for the wedding. She was beside herself with happiness.
As they left the plane after landing in Phuket, Stella waved goodbye to the captain, with whom she had the chance to chat after a trip to the toilets during the red-eye flight, while most passengers were catching some sleep.
She shot an envious glance at what she considered the best office in the world - the flight deck of a Boeing 777.
~~/~~
It was quiet, the only sound coming from the waves crashing on the beach.
The hotel room had become a lot more appealing now that Stella wasn't alone anymore, the view to the ocean through the wide open terrace doors that led the moonlight inside more beautiful than she experienced in the days before.
Sweaty and sticky, lying on her front, she could only see the top of Sebastian's head as he lay beside her, the two sprawled across the mattress with the sheets all tangled up underneath, his face pressed against her upper arm. His hair was a much darker blond tone from being wet and she ruffled it, sighing in contentment.
"I missed you."
"I missed you, too."
Sebastian's flight had landed in Phuket late in the evening. After telling him she was going out for dinner with the gang and would wait for him at the hotel lobby, in reality, she went in the opposite direction from the others, who were all hitting Bangla Road, and headed for the airport.
The German had been yawning when she spotted him dragging his trolley, a hoodie folded over his arm as he made his way into the arrivals hall. Literally running towards him, she had barely given him time to let go of his luggage before she jumped up and wrapped her legs around his waist - mini sundress be damned - almost knocking him over. There had been a lot of excited laughter and kissing and everything was a bit of a haze until they got to the hotel, where she decided not to wait for him to get out of the shower.
"This little dip you have... right here." Sebastian was caressing the small of her back, finger pressing the spot at the bottom of her spine. "I love it..."
From the back of her neck, his finger slid down again, tracing every bump of her spine. He suddenly held her by the waist and gently rolled her on her side, his hand sliding to her front. The feather-like touch on her stomach left a trail of goosebumps in its wake, as it moved upwards over her ribs. Sitting up by her side, she could now watch his face properly and his focused, intent expression as his index finger started drawing over her tattoo. He continued, brushing the swell of her breast with his fingertips now. Her nipple hardened as he rubbed circles around it. She inhaled deeply when he cupped her breast with one hand.
If at first his touch was relaxing, now it was making her feel incredibly aroused, despite the weird sensation that sex was the last thing on his mind.
As if reading her thoughts, Sebastian simply said,"The shapes of your body are incredible."
"Oh? I don't suppose you brought your sketchbook...?"
He removed his hand from her chest and shook his head with a wide grin, as if her suggestion was preposterous.
"I'll pose for you," she insisted, demonstrating by laying an arm on the mattress above her head.
"No..."
"Anyway you want me."
He laughed. "I can't!" Eyes locked with his, Stella watched as he nibbled on his lower lip, clearly reconsidering and switching his gaze to her body again, running his eyes over her form. Eventually, he gingerly placed a hand on the back of her knee, bending her leg and bringing her thigh to cross over the other one. "Can you... arch your back a little?"
She acceded, her backside and chest more pronounced, and she tried to imagine what the view looked like from where he sat. "Are you trying to create a big, twisty S shape? Is that for Sebastian or Stella?"
"What if it's S for sexy?"
He narrowed his eyes, trying hard to focus. Or memorising, she suddenly realised. But after a few moments his gaze began to cloud as it ran over her silhouette.
"Hey, hey." She snapped her fingers at him. "You have to be professional about it."
There was a pause and suddenly he dipped, hooking one arm under the back of her knees, startling her.
"Seb!"
He flattened on the bed, placing a wet kiss on her navel. "Yeah, fuck no. Forget it, I don't wanna be profissional. I quit."
She slid her fingers into his hair as he pressed more small kisses on her lower belly, heading down. "Luckily for you there's other talents we can put to good use."
"Should be lucky you, no?" The arm around her legs moved and he parted them with his hand, resting it high on her inner thigh. The tips of his fingers were crawling upwards dangerously and he looked up from below, provocatively, his tongue poking out between his teeth.
She giggled when he suddenly propped himself up with his arms and started crawling up over her. "No... no!"
He lowered his head, crystal clear eyes shining with the hint of moonlight, but as she reached out to meet him for a kiss, he pushed his tongue against her cheek, licking her in a silly way, and she laughed, pushing him away.
"Let's make this more fun," he whispered in her ear, as she wrapped her arms and legs around him. "Why don't you tell me what you want?" He pulled back to look at her. "In German, so I can see if you're keeping up with your lessons."
"Mmm filthy. Alright," she cleared her throat. "I'm ready. Teach me how to say it. And prepare for the unsexiest request for sex of your entire life."
There was a wicked glint dancing in his eyes, his lips tightly pursed. "Remember when I told you how to order a coffee?"
It took a moment for it to click and Stella froze in shock when he pressed his forehead against her shoulder, his body shaking with laughter.
"You're a bellend, Seb."
~~/~~
They knocked at Natasha's door the next morning on their way for breakfast. Awake but nursing a hangover, the Russian deemed herself ready for no more than a strong cup of coffee. She did offer Sebastian a friendly smile and pointed down at herself.
"As you can see, I actually get dressed to greet people."
They sat outside under the large parasols by the lagoon pool, enjoying the picturesque views of the water. Only Sebastian had proper breakfast, both flatmates sticking to coffee and a cigarette, the trio chatting lightly.
Sebastian's phone rang after a while and it was Britta.
"It's for that interview, it won't take long, I promise."
"No, you do your thing," she kissed back when he bent over for a quick peck on her lips.
Returning to the call, he walked away towards the garden on the other side of the building.
It was a great day for a wedding, in Stella's opinion. The ceremony would be a simple, casual affair at sunset and it was nice to have the day to relax and prepare for the event, which would take place at the hotel's private beach. Not far from their table, occupying another one of the elegant wicker round sofas, were other guests of the grooms. Ryan's parents could also be seen a little further back, sitting with some of their other relatives. His nephews were entertaining themselves by running across one of the bridges to a small pool island, around the palm tree, and then back. She waved at them and the boys waved back excitedly; they were now best friends after she spent the previous afternoon building sand castles and playing paddle ball with them.
Bella, Mark and his brother Jonathan were coming over and they seemed excited.
"Morning, girls! You would not believe who we just saw," Mark announced, pulling one of the inviting wicker lounge chairs with more force than he perhaps intended, and plopping down. His brother followed and Bella joined the girls on the sofa. "Fucking buzzing."
"Right here at the fucking lobby," his brother Jonathan added, his face red and not just because of the Thai sun. "We got autographs and pictures, what a cracking lad!"
"Who?" Stella asked curiously. She glanced at Natasha, who was unperturbed, adding honey to her pancakes.
"If it's not Chris Hemsworth I don't care," the Russian said, spearing a piece.
"Chris what?"
At that, Stella noted how the stares of the two brothers swerved to some point behind her, as if they'd seen a ghost. About to turn and check what had caught their attention, it was in that exact moment that a hand rested on her shoulder from behind. Sebastian was back.
The German was pushing his shades on top of his head and returning a similar intrigued look at the two brothers. He raised his eyebrows and pointed at them. "Aren't you... it's Mark and Jonathan, right?"
Bella was trying not to gawk and doing a poor effort of it and Stella chortled, a vivid picture forming in her mind.
"Please tell me you haven't just made utter tits of yourselves," Natasha deadpanned.
"I... bit too late for that, I'm afraid." Bella gulped.
"Oh! No, no. Don't worry," an amused Sebastian quickly reassured.
"Seb's staying with us today, guys. I was going to introduce you but something tells me you've gone ahead and done that by yourselves already, so cheers for that." She shifted in her seat, grabbing the German's hand and pulling him closer. "Budge up ladies, there's room for one more."
Nobody was in the mood to do much but sip cold drinks and chit chat, so they ended up staying there the rest of the morning. Mark and Jonathan were a little starstruck at first but quickly relaxed before Sebastian's unpretentious manner. Stella also introduced him to everyone who came by to greet them; if anyone else apart from Ryan's dad recognised him, they didn't mention it. The grooms sat with them for awhile, too. They were slightly anxious but undeniably thrilled and thankful to everyone who was there for the big day.
After a light lunch, one by one, they all began to make their way back to their own rooms to get ready for the ceremony. The lobby was crowded when Stella and Sebastian were returning, a large group of Asian tourists checking in parked right in the middle of the hall. There seemed to be some commotion with a broken glass panel and the staff was awkwardly asking everyone to step back while the floor was swept.
Sebastian observed with his arms folded in front of his chest with a very judgmental look. "Why haven't they cleaned a path to allow people to pass first and then continue? Instead of leaving everyone waiting until they finish?"
"Must be to make sure it's safe?"
"But all they have to do is start from one side first."
"Whiny, whiny," she joked, fondly brushing a curl of hair off his forehead with her fingers.
"I'm German. I have to complain about something."
Some people in the bar adjacent to the lobby were also watching and Stella found herself locking eyes with an older man in a white suit across the room.
Her heart rose to her mouth and as she turned her back on him, her phone slipped off her grasp and dropped on the floor like a stone.
"Shit..."
It fell again when she crouched down to pick it up. Calmly reaching for the device and checking if the screen was still lit, Sebastian handed it to her.
"Thanks."
"Is everything okay?"
She forced a smile. "Just me being clumsy."
She only realised they were still both crouched in the same position when he touched her hand gently. "Stella. Are you okay?"
They stood up together, his hand still holding hers. She took pride in her poker face but by the way he was scrutinising her, this time it hadn't worked.
"Don't turn around too quick," even her voice was slightly strained. "There is a man in a white suit at the bar. Medium stature, grey hair. He's in a group with four or five blokes, all drinking wine."
Sebastian could have been more discreet but it didn't matter. His mouth was already curled in a downwards line. "Yeah, I see him. What happened?"
"Client."
Staring straight ahead at the hotel staff who was trying to handle the restless guests, she could feel Sebastian's eyes on her. He seemed taken aback too; his hand rested on the small of her back.
"Why don't we go outside? They'll be done with this by the time we're back."
Leading her outside, they ambled along until they reached the beach. Sebastian kept his trainers on, hands shoved in the pockets of his shorts, squinting in the sunlight while his shades hung from the collar of his white t-shirt. Stella took her sandals off, digging her toes in the warm, white sand. The structure for the wedding ceremony and reception was already up, in the far corner. The arch looked pretty, simply draped with white fabric and bundles of flowers decorating both sides. Before she could stop it, her treacherous mind strayed and she wondered what Sebastian's own wedding must have been like.
"Are you sure it was someone... someone you knew?"
"I never forget a face."
"But did he do anything or...?"
"He was just looking at me, he recognised me." She rubbed her arms, crossed in front of her chest. It couldn't possibly be cold but she felt frozen from within. "How? What are the odds? We're halfway across the globe, we're so far away from London."
The weight of one decision, one monumental mistake came crashing down all over again. In the past couple of months she might have been lulled into a false sense of security but this would haunt her for life; never knowing what the next turn on the road would bring.
She would never be free of it.
"What is he going to do? Nothing." Sebastian suddenly said. "He's not gonna do anything, so there's nothing to be afraid of."
"Yeah. I suppose so. Just... just wasn't expecting this." She snuggled into him when he slid an arm over her shoulders and let him pull her against his chest for a hug, his sunglasses pressing against her collarbone. "I thought I could forget about it and leave it in the past but it was the biggest blunder in my life and I can't."
"But we wouldn't have met." He cradled her face between his hands and made her look up. "We wouldn't have met..." he repeated, sofly.
It felt different, hearing it from him. She stroked the side of his face, more moved than she expected. It never occurred to her that while she tried to drill it into her head every time that negative feeling took over - he might be feeling the same.
The weight in her chest dissipated.
"It's true, you're right. I'll try to remember what you said next time."
~~/~~
Two identical linen button down shirts were laid on the bed: one white and the other one a light blue. Sebastian was staring at them shirtless, with his hands on his hips, tan khaki trousers already on. Stella twisted her mouth in appreciation; she liked him better naked but those looked great on him.
"Did Britta pick those?"
"My brother," he grumbled.
"Good man, Fabian." Stella continued applying her make-up. "White shirt, if you want my opinion."
He grabbed it straight away.
She checked herself in the mirror once she was ready. The backless, turquoise and green bohemian maxi dress had a high slit and a halter plunging v neck that flattered her figure. Upgrading from her usual just-rolled-out-of-bed hair, she opted for a natural, tousled look with minimal styling, with some laid back beachy waves. An extra long pendant necklace completed her look. She sniffed her wrist again. Sebastian had brought her attar from Abu Dhabi and not only were the flasks absolutely gorgeous, but he had nailed the scent mix.
He was sitting on the sofa messaging on his phone. The sun in Abu Dhabi had been kind to him and the white and pastel tones of his outfit looked great on his tan skin.
"I'm ready."
He lifted his head and his eyes widened. "Oh. You look amazing."
"You like it?" She approached him with an attempt at a graceful ballet leap. "And you look dashing, my love."
He was all buttoned up and while it looked as formal as it probably should, she couldn't resist the itch and undid the top button with a cheeky grin. With a grimace, he buttoned it again. She answered with a playful eyeroll but didn't insist.
Leaning against her side, he lifted his phone for a selfie.
"Pictures already?"
Sebastian didn't reply immediately. In fact, he didn't exactly look very happy and she rubbed the wrinkle between his brows with her thumb.
"Just my parents asking for pictures."
Her heart skipped a beat; Fabian knew they were together, they even followed each other on Instagram, but Sebastian hadn't mentioned he'd told the rest of his family about her. There was no point in making a big deal about it but it meant a lot to her that he had. It wasn't a secret that they were hoping he'd get a girlfriend. Stella herself wasn't exactly announcing it on her social media but she did share with her father that there was someone important in her life now and her closest friends were aware she was dating someone. The news was bound to spread like wildfire after the wedding.
"Are they very annoying? God, with that face you're pulling, they're gonna think I'm holding you at gunpoint," she chuckled.
He sighed and lowered the hand holding the phone. "Sorry. You're right. And yeah, they just keep asking things now... I don't know why Fabian had to go and tell them!" He whined.
Oh. Glancing away, she swallowed hard, wetting her lips. Sebastian was still fiddling with the camera settings. She adjusted the neckline of her dress; maybe she ought to look a little more modest.
He quirked an eyebrow when she plucked a shawl from the pile of clothes inside her trolley. "What are you doing? Come here."
"Best to put something on that is a bit more parent friendly?"
He blinked slowly. Seizing the shawl from her hands, he tossed it on the bed without a word and looped an arm around her waist.
She leaned her head on his shoulder, a genuine wide smile on Sebastian's face as they posed together.
He snapped the photo.
~~/~~
Weddings and marriage in general were a mere formality in Stella's book. Witnessing Ryan and Noah walking the aisle in the middle of the all-white folding chairs arranged to face the ocean and exchanging vows with the sunset as a backdrop, however, gave her goosebumps.
"What is that ribbon around their wrists?" Sebastian whispered in her ear, the two sat side by side on one end of a row of chairs. "What religion is that?"
"It's called handfasting. You bind both lives with this ritual. You don't have to be religious to do it this way, it's more of a spiritual thing." She watched as he made an 'oh' face. "You never watched Game of Thrones?"
He grinned sheepishly. "Should I?"
"Skip the last season when you do."
The reception was simple, under a canopy of string lights. The beautifully assembled Thai dishes were delicious but the most important ingredients were everyone's good spirits, a lot of laughter and the unspoken, collective feeling of partaking in something special.
Sebastian discussed vintage car models with Mark, cracked dad jokes with Natasha, attentively listened to Jonathan, who was an environmental engineer, talking about the impact of tourism in Thailand... It seemed almost surreal to coexist with him and her friends simultaneously, without having to hide or to lie or to pretend he wasn't part of her life. In the back of her mind, she also was pleased that he was having fun; he needed it.
Sandals and shoes were discarded after cake cutting and their table of six decided to change scenery for a bit and sit on the sand, closer to the edge of the water. In the dark and distant from prying eyes, they passed a couple of joints around. Sebastian declined.
"The season's over, mate, you sure?"
"It's not a good idea. Marijuana wears off quick but it can stay in your system for weeks. I'll survive!"
He didn't look at all regretful.
They were beckoned back by Ryan's sister just as the newlyweds were about to share the first dance, the opening chords of Same Love by Macklemore playing in the speakers. Stella wasn't sure if it was the wine, the weed or the magical atmosphere, but her eyes welled up with tears watching them sway to the music under the canopy of string lights, gazing at each other with adoration as if there was nobody else there.
"Christ, does Noah have two left feet," Mark commented. "I'm a straight white male, what's his excuse?"
The guests erupted in applause at the end and Stella couldn't help herself, she was one of the first to run to the grooms for a hug, barefoot and holding up her dress. The synths of Donna Summer's I Feel Love filled the air next; the party was well and truly kicking off.
~~/~~
Arms interlocked, Stella and Bella made their way to the small bar with a straw roof that had been set up for the wedding. Perched on stools while they waited for their drinks, their attention was drawn to a group at the shoreline, running after what looked suspiciously like a ball.
"Please tell me they're not playing football."
Mark and Ryan's brother-in-law were there, along with a few Thai kids, one of Noah's friends, too... and Sebastian, trousers rolled up to his knees, was the one who had just kicked the ball, gripping his own hair in exasperation at something.
"A bunch of gits. That's what they are," Bella concurred. "Must've been one of the kids that brought the ball."
Sebastian had been signing caps for a couple of kids earlier in the evening, Stella recalled.
"I approve of this one."
They turned aside at the sound of Ryan's voice, who had just sprung out of nowhere. Gently pushing Stella off her seat to take it, he sat her on his lap sideways.
"I approve of your new man, Stella. You said you met him in Monaco?"
She bit her lip, containing a smile. "In the summer, yeah. Scored an invitation for a party." There was an expectant silence, as both Bella and Ryan waited for more. For the first time, she genuinely wanted to share the truth, all of it. "I was probably the only idiot there that didn't really know him," she said instead. "He was lovely."
"He's so down to earth, you'd never guess he's famous." Bella sighed. "Jesus, I wish a man looked at me the way he looks at you."
"What about the waiter with the 'stache? Trust me, he's very keen." She winked at Ryan while Bella spluttered.
"I said man, not a comic book character!"
Ryan tutted. "Shouldn't judge a book by its cover."
"Don't change the subject," their friend turned to Stella again. "We have to talk about the fact that you lied to us. Legit thought it was Leclerc who'd given you the tickets for Monza."
"I told you that was ridiculous!"
"Yeah - and there were pictures of you and him at Ferrari's motorhome that you didn't show us, or have you conveniently forgotten about that?"
Stella sniggered and covered her mouth with her hand. "I didn't lie, didn't I tell you I met him? Just never got to explain where we'd been chatting."
"Bitch. Could've told us. Pretty sure I heard all those whispers about Sebastian splitting from his wife when the season started, so it's not like you were sleeping with a married guy or anything like that."
"There wasn't much to tell back then."
"Yeah, sure, darling," Ryan squeezed her waist. "Super fit men, driving fast cars... Not sexy at all, nothing to tell. Now, Noah," he guffawed, Bella giggling too, apparently in the know about whatever silly episode he was about to share. "Noah also figured you had to be shagging someone who worked in Formula 1 but he didn't think it was a driver: he said it was a trainer or a coach. I believe the exact words were more muscle, less brain." Stella slapped his shoulder, outraged. "Why are you hitting me?!" But they only laughed harder.
"I'm hitting him by proxy. I hope he felt it, the idiot!"
Once their amusement died down, Bella charged again. "So you're serious, are you?"
A shrug of shoulders. "Eh, too soon to say. We'll just take it slow."
"Slow? You?" Ryan chuckled. "Definitely serious!"
"You should be proud of me, alright?" His bowtie was a little out of place and she focused on righting it. "I don't wanna fuck this up."
Ryan stroked her hair sympathetically. "Long distance relationships are never easy, no."
"Not thinking about that, to be honest."
"A lot of drivers have their girlfriends around for the races," Bella offered.
Stella rolled her eyes and scoffed. "Well, that ain't happening. It's not me. Not him either. What's the point when they're so busy?"
"Have you met his kids yet? How old are they again?"
She tossed her hair out of her eyes. "I haven't. They're four and five," she looked down at her hands in her lap. The silence was suddenly a little too loud. "Things will happen when they're supposed to happen. We're not quite in the same place right now and... but we want to be. So that's it."
"Really? Cos if so, you're fooling everyone."
Ryan jostled her against his chest. "I don't need to tell you that someone who doesn't give himself fully doesn't deserve you, you know that all too well. And you can't wait for someone forever. But," he squeezed her hand. "What is more special requires more effort. Perseverance. When it hurts, it fucking hurts. And there is no happy ending, it's always a battle. You just have to fight together and not against each other." He smiled at her kindly. "Can't promise it will be easy but it's definitely worth it."
The butterflies in Stella's stomach were going wild. "Noah is the luckiest man in the world."
"The most handsome too, hence why I married him."
A couple of Ryan's friends eventually came over to collect him and the groom placed noisy kisses on the girls' cheeks before shimmying away singing along to AC/DC.
"Shook me aaall night long!"
Stella sipped her cocktail and glanced over her shoulder at the shoreline, where the guys were still playing and shouting in the distance. "Bella. Let's go."
"Where?"
"To play football, of course."
"Haven't finished my drink yet."
She reached out for the highball glass and downed Bella's G&T, who dropped her jaw in a comical mix of indignation and shock, then proceeded to finish her own. Slamming the glass down, she slapped the countertop as heat flared up inside her. "Shall we go now?"
The rest of the night turned into a boozy blur with some memories more colourful than others.
The two girls had crashed the match, and it was no holds barred from that moment on, until Bella was lifted on someone's shoulders and tossed in the water.
She remembered singing loudly to Usher while getting a piggyback ride from Sebastian into the heart of the party.
She could still hear the joyful screeching of Ryan's nephews as she and Natasha skipped around in circles with them holding hands.
The catcalls and whoops from when she and Ryan treated everyone to an old Latin dance routine of theirs played in a loop in her head loudly, the fact that it was rusty not bothering their audience.
The vivid image of a plastered Sebastian enthusiastically hugging everyone and promising over and over to carry her to the hotel if she was too drunk to walk back would hopefully live on in her memory; his words became more and more slurred each time he repeated them but as affectionate and confident as the first time.
She spun and twirled on the sand with Sebastian, hair flying around, like there was no tomorrow; loud music and laughter ringing in her ears and her heart pumping wildly in her chest, powered by pure exhilaration.
The sun was rising.
Sitting upright, she surveyed her surroundings. Their group was a pile of limbs and flimsy fabrics from the girls' gowns, everyone lying in a heap on the sand. Natasha was missing but not far from them, making out with one of Noah's friends. A group of early risers, hotel guests probably, were already settling under the straw umbrellas.
Her eyes followed back the arm wrapped around her waist; Sebastian was out cold halfway under her, spreadeagled. An involuntary gurgle of laughter started in her throat and a nasty pounding in her head announced itself at the same time.
She was sixteen years old again and the world was at her feet.