Tessa
I didn't know if I was overreacting. It hurt me too to talk to him like this, but the fact that he completely forgot about me and didn't even think about texting me made me sad. Of course I was thankful it was just that and that he was okay. I would never want anything to happen to him. I couldn't focus all day because I was worried something might've happened to him.
I fell asleep almost immediately after he left. I was mentally drained with all the things happening.
I woke up hearing a voice in the distance. It took me a few seconds, but I quickly realized it was Leo.
"Sorry, I'm a little busy right now" He said, "Yes, I will get it done today, just not right now"
I opened an eye to see what he was doing and saw him standing and talking on the phone. He looked irritated and kind of worried.
"I want to get rid of them too, Ares. I just have something really important to do right now" He whispered and waited for a reply, "Fine, I'll see you today" He said and hung up.
"Get rid of who?" I asked startling him.
"Oh-um-"
"Let me guess. You can't tell me"
He looked at me with sad eyes and lowered his head.
Not the puppy eyes. Fuck.
"Oh, I can tell you"
I was instantly filled with hope. He trusted me to tell me this? I felt like it was all a dream.
"I just don't want to"
And that's how my hopes were crushed.
"W-what? Why?" I asked.
"Because you'll leave me" He mumbled quietly.
I sat up and looked up at him, "I would never leave you" I reassured him.
He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, "It feels so good to hear you say that, Tessa" He said, "If only it was true"
"What do you mean? What could be so bad?"
"Nothing. I've said too much again"
"But-"
"I'll go get breakfast"
"But Leo-"
"I said it's nothing!" He yelled.
He was being weird again and I didn't know how to deal with it. He was like a bomb ready to explode.
"Talk to me"
"Now you want me to talk to you? You hated me last night"
"Because you forgot about me and I was worried"
"So worried that you welcomed me with yelling and said you hated me"
"I was just angry" I said standing up.
"I've been working day and night to help you and you get mad because I forgot to do one little thing?"
"One little thing was all I asked for. I never asked you to work so much for me you decided to do that" I said pointing at him, "You insisted on helping me and you asked me to be your girlfriend"
"Yes, because I wanted to, but be a little more understanding. This is taking a lot out of me and I might forget some things. Are you going to act like a-"
"Finish that sentence and you'll never see me again in your life" I said crossing my arms, "You're keeping so many secrets from me and each time I've said it's okay because I knew it was a sensitive topic and you weren't ready to tell me and you're telling me I'm not understanding?"
His features softened. I could tell he realized his mistake and he was regretting it now.
"You know what? I don't want your fucking help"I said and gathered my things to leave.
I caught a glimpse of his panicked face before turning around and walking to the front door. He followed me and just as I was about to open the door he put his hand on one side of me and held my wrist tightly with the other. He leaned close to me towering over me.
"Where do you think you're going?" He asked.
"Home. I don't want to see you" I said. I could see how hurt he was, but saying it probably hurt me more than him.
"You're not leaving until we talk it out"
"Didn't you say you didn't want to talk a few seconds ago?"
"I'm not letting you go" He said firmly and tightened his grip on my wrist.
The look on his face was so overwhelming, full of emotions I couldn't read, but I could see that panic was dominant.
"Stop that. You're hurting me" I admitted.
His eyes widened in shock and he took a step back, his hands falling to his sides, "I'm sorry"
"I'm leaving now" I said hoping he wouldn't try to stop me.
"No, please don't. I'm sorry, I promise you, I'll be better"
"I want to leave"
Did I really want to leave? I wanted to fix things with him but I thought leaving was necessary at that moment. He was clearly not in his right mind and I wasn't really either.
"Please don't. Let's not fight over a stupid text"
"I was worried all day. You never text me because you're too "busy" I just asked you to tell me you're okay"
"I didn't forget about you. I couldn't stop thinking about you all day. Nate will tell you the same thing"
He talked about me to his friend? I couldn't help but want to smile at that, but I didn't.
"I only forgot about the text because I wanted to get straight to work. I don't want to waste time"
"Maybe I overreacted about the text" I said and saw his face fill with hope, "I was just worried because of how exhausted you were and I shouldn't have made it such a big deal. I'm sorry for that" I said.
"You don't have to be sorry-"
"I'm not finished" I said holding out my hand and he nodded, "That doesn't change the fact that you acted like a complete asshole just now"
Sadness and regret took over his face again and he looked down, "I know and I'm sorry. I'm so sorry" He said and reached out to cup my face, but I took a step back.
"Maybe we should take a tiny break" I said afraid of his reaction.
"W-what?" He frowned, his hands were slightly trembling and for the first time I felt scared around him, "But we just got together"
"And this is already not working out" I sighed. I glanced at his hands quickly and then looked back at him.
He observed me for a few seconds, "You're scared" He pointed out.
"W-what? No" I said. I was half lying. I was scared, yes, but I knew deep down that he would never hurt me physically.
"Your body is tense. You keep glancing at my hands. You're slightly leaning your body away from me and your legs are pressed together. You're scared of me" He said coming to a conclusion. He looked as surprised as I was. I hadn't realized it was so obvious that I felt that way.
"You just acted a bit weird and I-" I trailed off.
"I would never hurt you. Ever" He said with a hurt look and then dropped his gaze to the floor.
Then I realized how stupid I'd been. He had never done anything close to hurting me, he'd saved me and protected me multiple times. How could I think he would ever hurt me?
"I just get a little shaky when I'm panicking. I didn't mean to scare you. I'm sorry" He seemed ashamed as he said that. He held his hands together to stop them from shaking and kept his head down and his voice was barely over a whisper.
I didn't know what to say. I wanted to comfort him, but was it the right time for that? I didn't care. I didn't even think about it before reaching out to take his hands in mine, "It's okay, Leo. I'm sorry for assuming you'd do that"
"Did I ever give you the impression that I would hurt you?" He asked but didn't get a reply, "I just don't want to lose you"
"I'm sorry, but I still think we should take a break. Things are stressful right now"
"B-but I-" He trailed off and looked down. There it was again. The sad puppy face.
I reached out and put my hand on his cheek, "Just a few days, okay? Just to clear our heads"
"But I don't need to-"
"You do" I said stroking his cheek, "You're really stressed out"
"Being without you is going to stress me out even more"
"Only a few days I promise you"
Normally I shouldn't be acting like that when I'm basically telling him our relationship isn't working out, but as much as I thought we needed a break, I couldn't resist him or his sad look. I had to comfort him just like he comforted me whenever I was sad.
"Two days?" He asked.
I chuckled, "A little more"
"Three?"
"How about a week?" His face looked like he was about to get a panic attack so I quickly reconsidered, "5 days" I said.
"What's the point if we're getting back together?" He asked, "It feels like we're just wasting time"
I sighed. He was right. I was overreacting because of how strange his behaviour was that morning. It was just a text, I could brush it off. It's not like I wanted to be away from him.
I should probably drop it.
"You're right" I said and dropped my gaze to the floor, "It was just a text. I'm sorry for overreacting" I said.
I heard him let out a sigh of relief and he took a step closer to me, "No, you were worried. I would be really upset too if you did that to me" He said.
I closed the distance between us wrapping my arms around his torso and leaning into him. His arms provided comfort and I needed that.
I missed this.
He wrapped one arm around my waist and used his other hand to push my chin up to make me look at him, "You had me holding my breath there. I know I've been really busy, but I never stop thinking about you" He said and leaned down to kiss my lips, "I missed doing this" He whispered.
He pressed his soft lips on mine and brought me closer. He was gentle and hesitant probably because of the fight, but it was so sweet.
Somehow he was the only boy that managed to get me to be shy around him. I've kissed other boys before. I've been around other boys, but it wasn't even close to what I had with Leo.
He pulled away and looked at me with half closed eyes, "Stay a little more" He asked, his lips brushing mine with each word.
I felt like I couldn't breathe and my face felt like it was on fire, "I can't. I'm supposed to go out with the girls"
"But I want you" He said lifting his hand and brushing a curl away from my face, "-to stay" He added.
I gulped nervously. He held the back of my neck, his fingers slightly pulling at my roots.
Why does that feel good?
"Please, sweetheart" He mumbled and hid lips moved to my neck. He took my hand with his other hand and put it on his chest. I could feel his heart beating really fast, but he seemed calm.
"I have t-to-" I trailed off when I felt his lips on my neck.
"Just a few seconds more" He mumbled and then went back to nibbling on my neck. I was breathing heavily, trying to stay put do I don't embarrass myself, but I couldn't hold back a sound when he slightly bit me.
Maybe the secret he's keeping is that he's a vampire. It would totally make sense.
Get it together, Tessa.
He chuckled when he heard me and pulled back, "All done" He said and ran a finger on the spot he was kissing earlier.
"All done?" I repeated tilting my head. My eyes widened when I realized what he meant. I took out my phone to see my reflection and glared at him when I saw what he had done.
He smirked, "What?"
"You left m-marks!" I was too embarrassed to even say it, but I tried to stay put once again.
He hummed in reply, "And now you have to go out with the girls, remember?"
I threw him another glare and put my shoes on.
"Have fun!" He yelled as I exited the apartment.
________
I couldn't say I was happy with how things went this morning. We did "fix" things but for how long?
Even when I was out with my friends, I couldn't enjoy it. I wanted someone to talk to and I knew they would listen to me, but some problems with Serenity and her family showed up and I didn't want them to be worried about me too.
Jane however knew there was something up and texted me when I went back home. She asked if she could come over so we could talk.
I needed someone to talk to. Even if she wouldn't understand anything I needed support.
So I told her she could come. I was babysitting my sisters but I knew they wouldn't bother us. About ten minutes after I heard a knock on the door.
"Who is it?" My sister, Carol, asked.
"It's Jane" I said.
They both loved Jane so they followed me and waited for me to open the door.
"Jane!" They both yelled excitedly and hugged her.
She laughed and hugged them back, "Hi cuties" She greeted and got down to their level, "How have you two been? You look even cuter than what you did last time I saw you" She said.
She's so good with children. I could never.
"Thank you!" They both said.
"So polite, good job" She said, "And look what I got you" She said taking out a book and giving it to them.
"You didn't have to do that" I murmured.
"We're going to need it to distract them" She whispered.
"It's a new coloring book!" Mia, my other sister, said.
"Yes! How about you go color while your sister and I talk for a bit?" She suggested.
They both nodded and ran off to their room.
"Thank you for that" I said.
"You have some explaining to do" She said sitting on the couch.
"I know" I sighed and sat down next to her.
"It's Leo isn't it?"
I nodded, "We just got together but we keep fighting over stupid things. I don't blame him, it's my fault too, but I can't help but be angry when he ignores me"
"I understand honey, it's okay to feel like that. It's normal to want to spend time with the person you like and it's normal to feel angry when they seem like they don't want the same" She said putting her hand on my shoulder.
"He's just always busy" I sighed.
"Maybe it's right person wrong time" She suggested, "Give it some time"
"I asked him to take a break but he wouldn't agree to more than five days and convinced me to stay together"
I didn't really regret staying with him. I was just worried I'd make the wrong decision.
"It seems to me like he doesn't want to let you go" She said, "But that's not always a good thing"
"I know" I said covering my face with my hands.
"You know your relationship better than I do. All I can say is be careful and I'll always be here for you"
"Just please don't tell Ren. She has enough on her plate already" I said.
"Okay" She replied.
That was enough for me. I needed someone there for me. Her words were comforting. Not as comforting as Leo's words and arms, but I needed a friend right now.
"I just wanted to check if you're okay. I know there are some things you're not ready to tell me" She said.
"Thank you, Jane. You don't know how much I needed this" I said.
She opened her arms and smiled, "Come here" I smiled back and fell into her embrace, "It'll be okay. I promise you"
"Um Tessie" I heard Carol. I looked at her and flinched at what I saw.
"How did you girls manage to get marker stains all over you?" I asked standing up. I could hear Jane's silent laughter.
"We're sorry Tessie" Mia said pouting.
"Let's clean them up" Jane said to me.
_________
It was already nighttime and I was in bed trying to fall asleep, but I couldn't. I couldn't stop thinking about him. I couldn't stop seeing his heartbroken face everytime I closed my eyes. I didn't want to be away from him and he said he didn't want to either.
But how is our relationship supposed to work out? Would it get better over time? Isn't usually the opposite?
I shouldn't have overreacted over a stupid text. Maybe we wouldn't have fought then.
My thoughts were interrupted when I heard something coming from downstairs. I was instantly paranoid and stood up.
Does Leo still have people watching over me?
I decided to go check out what was going on and got my pocket knife with me in case it was something serious.
They will probably have guns if it's something serious, but I won't be empty handed at least.
I went to the living room trying to hide behind furniture in case someone was there. I checked the living room and then decided to check the whole house and look out the windows in case someone was there. There was no one.
I guess I'm just being paranoid. Right? Right.