[Komaeda's POV]
Hajime spent his day and wasted his time looking after unworthy filth like me. I'm so terrible... ruining the life of someone as amazing as him...
I need to make it up to him somehow... Ah, what will someone like me do... I mean, it's not like I'm fully capable of it, but... I'll do my best to make him feel special.
The next morning I wake up to Hajime sitting by my side again. He looked tired... not just tired, exhausted. Fatigued. Drained of whatever energy was left in him.
But still he sat there, making sure I was okay, his hand holding mine.
"H-Hinata-kun..." I said, deeply concerned. "Have you... slept at all..?"
No sounds came from him, just a subtle shake of the head.
He needed rest, but... I live alone, so this is the only bed in the house.
"Hinata, you... you lay here, okay?" I say, slowly struggling to trudge out of the room.
"W-Wait... Komaeda, where will you sleep-?" Hajime asks, concerned.
"I'll... be fine, I'll just lay down on the couch." I say, trying my best to reassure him.
"No. Komaeda, you're going to rest in your own bed." he says sternly, his tone shifting quickly.
"A-Alright... but where are you gonna rest..?"
"I... don't need to."
"Yes you do... Here, you can sleep... I don't need to."
"No, really..! You need to rest! You're sick..."
"No... my life isn't important anymore... whether I feel well or not doesn't matter at all." I say, looking at the gray carpet.
"Yes it does!! Everyone matters, you don't need to say that about yourse-"
"N-No, that's... not what I meant."
"Huh..?"
"Hinata-kun... the doctor, he told me that... I only have a week or two to live." I tell him, still focused on the floor.
"You...wha--?" He looked... scared... and shocked...
Back when we were students... I... didn't treat him very well at all...
Yes, that's partly because of his title as a Reserve Course student, but... the main reason was because I didn't want him getting hurt because of my luck cycle... because of this...
And now... he'll be sad again... he'll be in despair again... he'll be alone again.
Ahaha! I really am the most worthless being alive... I can never do anything right...
"H-Hinata, I'm... I'm going to go for a walk."
I take one last glance at him before I head out the door.
His brown hair was messier than it usually was. His tanned hands had begun to slightly shake. His face was shocked; terrified almost. His eyes were droopy and tired, and slowly filling up with tears.
Heh... could it be...? Someone as amazing as Hajime actually cares about a piece of trash like me..?
I slowly trudge down the stairs, careful not to fall, and slip on my jacket as I walk outside.
The air was cool and foggy, and dark grey clouds had begun to form overhead. Soon, an ever-so-slight sprinkle of rain had begun to fall.
I really should've been resting, especially in my current condition. But... I just needed to get out, I just needed to think about things for a while.
I stopped at a local café and ordered a caramel macchiato.
The cup was warm... and it felt somehow comforting on my cold hands. I brought the cup to my lips, taking a sip. It burned my tongue a little, but it was nice. It was bitter, but a little sweet at the same time.
Just like Hinata-kun.
It was probably the last cup of coffee I was ever going to have, so... I should enjoy it, right?
I continued to walk along the pathway, holding my half-finished coffee with both hands.
I take a deep breath, slowly walking as the cold rain slightly stings my face.
Why am I still... here?
I've done nothing but cause everyone despair... all while trying to make everyone happy...
I really am worthless.
All I wanted to do was live a happy life full of hope with Hajime...
So why... did it end up this way..?
It's all my fault... Why am I like this... Why am I so... messed up...
Hajime's gonna be sad again... And it's all because of me.
I felt a droplet of water roll down my face... but it wasn't rain.
Heh, seriously? I'm crying... at a time like this?
{🍀}
I walked down the pathway for another... I'd say, thirty minutes. I finished my macchiato and threw out the cup. I'm not exactly sure where I was walking or how I arrived back, but I eventually found my way home.
I opened the door, which was already unlocked, and took off my jacket. I immediately walk upstairs to check on Hajime, just to make sure he's okay.
I open the door of my bedroom, and see... nothing.
The bed was completely empty. Hinata-kun wasn't there.
Anxious, I frantically run around the house, looking for him.
But I couldn't find him. Anywhere.
Hajime was gone.
I run outside, desperately looking for him. He couldn't have gone far, right?
What if something terrible happened to him? What if he's not okay?!
I'm not sure where I was going, but... I was running somewhere.
The light sprinkle of rain turned into a heavy downpour, and my fluffy, whitish-pink hair had quickly become drenched.
As I ran aimlessly, I bumped into two people I never expected to see.
One was short, with short blonde hair that was slightly shaved on the sides. He wore a hoodie and black pants, and had freckles on his face.
The other was taller, and female. Her long grey hair was tied into two braids, and she wore glasses. She carried an umbrella that covered the two of them.
Huh? Fuyuhiko and Peko? Why are they here..?
"Yo, Komaeda! I haven't seen you in a year... what happened, man? You look distressed-..." Fuyuhiko begins. "...Oh. You're looking for him, aren't you..."
"W-Wait, how did you know?" I ask Fuyuhiko, hoping for any clue about Hajime's whereabouts.
"We saw him, running around not too long ago. He was headed over to that cemetery, twenty minutes away..." Peko spoke up.
I instantly knew where he was.
"Thank you, you two... I really appreciate it." I say, beginning to head over to where Hajime was.
"Wait, Komaeda." Fuyuhiko says as I leave. "Take this." he says, holding out the umbrella Peko was holding. "You don't need to return it, we have plenty."
I say nothing. I just nod, holding the umbrella in my left hand as I begin to sprint away.
I'm no Ultimate Runner, but... I was running as fast as I could.
{🍀}
In about fifteen minutes, I arrived at the cemetery. It was still raining heavily, and the cemetery had its own dark and eerie vibe.
Slowly and carefully, I walk past each and every gravestone, and eventually I begin to hear something distantly.
It sounded like...crying.
I head over to the source of the sound, which was in a corner behind a row of bushes.
And just as I thought... it was Hajime.
He was sitting on his knees, head buried in his hands, sobbing quietly.
I turned to the grave. It was surrounded with different kinds of flowers, and a card that read "We miss you. Love, your classmates." A familiar face was in a frame in front of the gravestone.
I then realised why he was here...
This is... Chiaki's memorial.
I take a deep breath, approaching Hajime slowly as I place a hand on his back, trying to reassure him.
"K-Komaeda...?" he says, turning his head to look at me. His eyes were stained red from crying, and tears were rolling down his face.
"Hajime..." I say. "You... you miss her too, don't you..." I softly speak.
"O-Of course I miss her!" he snaps. "Sh-She was my girlfriend, of course I miss her..!" He raised his voice.
"I'm sorry, Hinata... I really didn't mean to..." I say, looking towards the ground yet again.
"N-No, it's okay, Komaeda. You shouldn't apologise... I'm sorry for y-yelling at you like that." He sniffled, wiping his eyes with his hands. I handed him the umbrella so the rain no longer hit him.
Not thinking at all, I reach out and embrace him. I might have just disgusted him... I might have just angered him... but... I didn't mind. I didn't mind at all.
Hajime seemed shocked at first, but after a few seconds, he returned the hug.
"Komae- no... Nagito, you really make me feel special. Thank you... for everything."
"It's... no problem... no p-problem at all."
That's when I dropped to the floor and everything went black.
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[Editor's Note]
Hello again everyone~~! I know it's been a while since I last posted, hehe. But please don't get mad! I tried my best to make this chapter longer. Plus, the past couple chapters have been in Hajime's POV, so you guys get a Nagiwagi POV this chapter. >:)
Anyways, it's 2:30 in the morning, so I should definitely sleep. Or not. Who cares.
Anyways, please remember to eat well, stay hydrated and get a decent amount of sleep! I love you all!! 💜💜