𝐏𝐈𝐄𝐑𝐂𝐄𝐃 // 𝐇.𝐒.

50.

a/n: 1.1 million reads! that's insane??? thank you thank you thank you! i wanna cry, but without further ado...

Chapter 50

HARRY

I used to make wishes underneath sheets or stars in the sky up until the point I deemed it useless. No matter what I wished for and no matter how hard, I was stuck in the same hell hole day after day.

For the first time in so long, I found myself making wishes again but to the stars in her eyes rather than the ones in the sky. I noticed the guilt, I felt her anxiety, and I took the wrath that came with having to deceit me. I wasted time wishing and hoping she wasn't in trouble instead of doing something about it.

I can't be mad at her. It'd be hypocritical of me to blame her when I'm the one at fault. I wasn't more careful.

I had a plan. I meant to keep away from Jo the moment we got back from Las Vegas so that I could take Dante down. Lying to him that I had been killing members of the rival gang was risky in itself, but he believed it.

I was playing my cards right until I got the call from Sage, but her safety became more important to me than vengeance. I also couldn't let her feel the rejection against a cry for help. I knew that if I hadn't dropped what I was doing for the girl, she would have ended up dead or ruined like me.

So focused on getting Sage back to her mother, I didn't realize sooner that my girl was in trouble, too. Maybe I should've noticed the way she took charge of the trip to Mexico. She's never been much of a leader, I've noticed. After that, I overlooked the subtle cries for help she gave me. When she asked if I would forgive her if the roles were reversed that day on the beach, I overlooked it. I hoped and I desperately wished she was just curious and not put in the position I was once in.

Now we're both in trouble.

As she sleeps in the passenger seat with her head resting against the window, all I want to do is keep on driving so that she wouldn't wake up when I stopped. Though I had no choice but to pull over when we were running low on gas.

At a gas station with an hour and a half left until we reach the gruesome city, I come to a careful stop and undo my seatbelt. When the engine stops running, I hear her breathe in when she stirs. "Hey," I say under a breath. "I'm going to put some gas in. I'll be back."

Jo sits up from her nap, looking around to see where we are. When she doesn't recognize her surroundings, her eyes meet mine. "Okay... Are we almost there?"

"About an hour left. Now lock the doors. I'll be back, babe." I step back after she sends a nod my way. I shut the door and once I hear the locks, I look around me before heading towards the convenience store.

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared of what all of this could possibly entail. Being forced to believe that fear makes you weak growing up, I struggled to accept the feeling until I looked at her. Her pretty face with freckles across the bridge of her nose and the pouty lip I often want to steal a kiss from were just some of the minor things that convinced me of just how much it would kill me if I were to ever see her hurt. This fear I can't shake won't be dealt with irrationally. All I know is that she won't ever be fucked with again—not while I'm still around.

Instead of walking into the convenience store, I head towards the payphone. I glance over my shoulder, over at the parked SUV, before lifting the black phone. I hold it to my ear as I dig for change in the pocket of my pants. Once I pay, I begin to dial a number I conveniently memorized.

Ring after ring, I try my best not to slam the payphone and give up on trying to reach the person I claimed was dead to me.

"Hello?"

My grip around the payphone tightens over having to make this call. I didn't think I would have to, but I couldn't let my own pride lead me to disaster when I have Jo to think about.

"Hello? Anybody— Wait, is this Harry?"

I remain quiet for a moment longer, but I'm sure he can hear my hitched breath. "You said you can help me?"

Closing my eyes, I can hear a baby cry through the line. The wail fades as if he has stepped into a quieter space. "Of course I can help you. I've been waiting for your call—"

"Yeah, yeah, listen," I quickly dismiss. "I don't have much time but I'll be ditching LA soon. I just have to make a quick stop."

"Okay, where are you heading?"

"Seattle. After that, I'm thinking of fleeing the country so I'm going to need passports and IDs."

"You got it. I can get you that. But first, I'm so glad you called, Harry. I knew you'd come around and finally leave that life, my brother—"

"Don't," I quickly stop him. "Just because I fucking called for help, doesn't erase shit between us. You're still a stranger to me, Finnegan. Now, get me passports for Jo and me."

He heaves a sigh in defeat through the line over my words. "For Jo, too?" He then moves on.

"Yeah, she's in trouble. But that's not going to be a problem, is it?"

"Of course, not, um... I can meet you in Seattle."

"We'll be there in twenty-four hours. I'll call you again when I have an exact location of where we can meet up."

"Sounds—"

The line has cut off. I hear it go dead, but instead of dropping change for more minutes, I hang up. Enough was said and I didn't need to fall into useless conversation with him.

Even after I told him to leave me the fuck alone in Vegas, he didn't. He no longer followed me around, but he constantly called me. He left voicemails—several of them. I never intended to listen to any of the shit he left me, but I had been far too curious about it one night.

Still, his reasons for abandoning me in the cold weren't sufficient enough for me to let bygones be bygones. He stalked me and to his defense, he didn't know how to approach me. Finnegan knew that I would be angry if he were to come up to me, but that wouldn't even begin to describe the rage I hold.

In his voicemail, he told me that I could leave the life that has imprisoned my existence. He promised he could help me get out of it the way he once got out of a situation uncannily similar. He never told me how and I never asked questions.

I walked into the convenience store, collecting enough snacks and drinks for Jo on my way to the register. As I drop everything onto the counter, I glance out towards the parked SUV. Seeing she is safe, I turn to the man behind the counter as he rings me up. "Fifty on two, please," I mumble after digging cash from my pocket and dropping it onto the countertop. My eyes then drift to the rows of packed cheap cigarettes behind the man.

If I hadn't made a commitment to myself, I would have gone through five cartons by now. I swallow thickly when I miss the consuming burn in my chest that ultimately brings me relief.

I snap out of the running temptation by gathering the snacks I have purchased and leaving the store to head back to the car where she waits. I approach the window on the passenger's side and say, "Hungry? I brought snacks... some water, too."

Through her rolled-down window, she takes what I've offered only to set them on her lap. "I'm not really hungry right now, but thanks." Tilting her head to rest it where on the window opening, she closes her tired eyes and I can sense just how drained she is.

"Alright, but drink some water at least," I mumble when dipping my head absentmindedly and out of habit to kiss her temple. With that, she nods and lifts her head again.

I hear the water cap seal break the moment I turn to fill the car with gas. Again, I look around when the paranoia of being watched sets in. Once the car is filled, I tuck the nozzle away and step over the spilled gasoline on the floor to make my way back into the vehicle. I don't bother to collect my change from inside of the convenience store because I just want to get the hell away.

Starting the engine back on, Jo seems to go against falling asleep. She reaches for the volume dial to turn it up. She gasps and says, "I love this song."

Baby love, my baby love,
I need you oh how I need you.

"This song?" I ask about the old timeless love song. "How come?"

As I begin to drive, Jo rests her head back and she taps at her thighs along to the beat with pretty eyes shut. "'Cause baby love," she sings instead of answering my question. "my baby love, been missing ya, miss kissing ya...Instead of breaking up, let's start some kissing and making up."

Making a turn, I take a moment to glance over at her. She's singing softly and without much energy, but it's safe to say she has the most beautiful voice I've ever heard. Everything she does, however, is so fucking angelic to me. She has me breaking into a smile before I have to focus on the road again.

"Don't throw our love away. In my arms, why don't ya stay?" she sings some more as she then invitingly takes my hand from my lap to place it over her own. When she softly intertwines her fingers with mine, I curse myself for not being the one to hold her hand first.

After humming to the tune, she finally tells me, "This song always reminds me of the time my dad sang this at the top of his lungs for my mom. All I remember is that they fought... They were dropping me off at school one morning and the ride was so silent. Then, all of a sudden, my dad breaks into song. I don't know, my dad has always been a quiet guy so it was kind of funny. Especially when his voice cracked."

She's smiling her incredible smile over a memory that has stuck with her. Glancing at her again, I grow a desire to be let in her mind and watch every little moment that has ever made her laugh.

"Stupid, I know," she mumbles after I hadn't said anything.

"It's not stupid," I quickly say in case she wanted to draw her hand from mine. "I was just trying to picture it. How old were you then?"

"I don't know... like six or seven."

I smile at that. "And you remember that?"

"Yeah," she says. "It's just one of those things that just stick, you know? Doesn't matter how old you are."

I nod in agreement when I discover some truth in her words. There are certain moments that engrave into our brains out of a million other moments we seem to forget. Hers happens to be a fond memory while the things I remember are rooted in trauma. I didn't know what it was like to think back about good times until I started opening up to her.

Then, she's singing again.

___

"Let's go," I tell Jo after parking the car by the curb of Zayn and Sutton's home. With eager fingers, she unbuckles and hops out of the SUV with her bag in hand. I get out right after her, heading for the trunk to gather the rest of our stuff.

"Jo?!" I hear Sutton's voice and when I look over, she's standing on her porch with a hand shielding her face from the sun. She's walking down the steps, approaching Jo who is meeting her halfway. I follow right behind through the open gate and I watch as they embrace.

"Hi. I missed you," Jo says to her, hugging her tight. It isn't long before Zayn steps out onto the porch as well with a cigarette hanging from his lips.

"Me too, but what are you guys doing here?"

"A story for inside," I mumble, walking past them as I head up the porch steps. I look at Zayn, looking right into his eyes and something tells me he knows why I'm here.

"Come in," Zayn says, but I wait until Jo and Sutton walk inside first.

When Zayn and Jo look at each other, I feel a surge of jealousy wash over me for reasons not worth repeating. "Butterfly," he then greets her, which doesn't ease the negative feeling in my stomach.

"Zayn," she greets him back with a soft laugh, but she doesn't look at him directly.

I shut the door behind me after we've all settled into their living room, though maybe a little too hard.

"Jesus fuck, Styles," says Sutton after I caused a jumpscare. She huffs, leading us towards the couch but with a hand in Jo's.

"Sorry," I mumble, dropping our bags onto the floor as I follow right behind. "Listen, it's obvious we didn't come here to visit—"

As I sit down on the armchair, Zayn stands next to me and says, "What's wrong?" He then offers me a cigarette from his pack and once again I'm tempted. All I have to do is look at Jo to find the strength in me to deny the offer with a head shake. It helps that she's already looking at me.

"Change of plans," I say. "I'm not taking the mother fucker out anymore. He knows I've been lying to him. He knows I'm a traitor."

Zayn pauses and I would say he looks devastated if it wasn't for his blunt expression. Me killing Dante not only guaranteed my freedom, but Zayn's as well. "Backtrack," he then mumbles as he tosses his pack of cigarettes onto the coffee table. "What the hell is going on?"

As I'm about to explain, Jo beats me to it. "I, um," she shakily explains from the couch where she sits next to Sutton. "Louis has been blackmailing me—I mean, threatening me—for the past month... He's been wiring me money and he sent me to Mexico to bring something back with me."

"But it was a fucking setup," I add on.

"Like an initiation?" Zayn spikes an eyebrow and I nod.

"What the fuck?" Sutton then says. "What were they giving Jo an initiation test for?"

"Dante has some twisted agenda. He wants Jo so he can turn her into an Inferno and have control over her but I'm not going to let that fucking—"

"Okay, but why? Why Jo?" Sutton cuts me off as she searches for more clarity.

I look at Jo, but she's looking down at the floor instead as if she's stuck in thought but won't share it out loud. "Jo is Angelo Veca's granddaughter."

"No fucking way," Sutton whispers and it's when Jo's face softens.

"You guys didn't know?" Jo softly asks and I think relief has been brought to her to know that not everyone has been lying to her.

"No... Of course, not," she assures Jo.

"So what does this mean?" Zayn turns to me.

"It means... Jo and I have to get away from here. The phone Vampy had given Jo was bugged. He most likely heard everything between her and me. So, I can't follow through with the plan. I'm sorry, man."

"Don't apologize," Zayn says and shakes his head. "We had a backup plan for a reason."

"Backup plan?" Jo questions, raising an eyebrow.

Before I can explain, I hear heavy panting and the tapping of four paws against the wooden floor to my right. I shift when the dog tries to sniff me, but it then walks past me to get to Jo. She opens her arms, cooing something soft as it sits near her legs, and accepts a head scratch.

"Stark remembers you!" Sutton says as the dog seems to put a smile onto Jo's pretty face.

"I was hoping to see you again," Jo says to the dog as it keeps panting and hitting its tail against the couch.

"Anyway," I mumble. "Zayn and I had a plan in case things went to shit."

"Which is?" Jo looks at me again.

"We set up a safety net for one of us to use if it came down to it. Seeing the two of you are in danger, I'd say it's time," Zayn briefly explains. He then moves, walking towards the kitchen. He's still visible from our place in the living room as Zayn digs his hand into an open drawer. "Where are you heading?"

"We're making a stop in Seattle," I inform him, standing up from my seat when Zayn tosses car keys my way.

"I'll report to Dante that you're heading to New York," Zayn says.

I nod, tucking the key to the car in Zayn's garage in my palm.

"Wait," Jo then says. She's looking up at me then she turns to look at Zayn. "If you're telling Dante we are going to New York, doesn't that mean you're lying to him? What if he finds out? Doesn't that put you in danger, too?"

"He won't find out," I tell her, attempting to assure her but I can sense my words have only worried her further. She softly frowns.

"But what if he does?"

"Butterfly," Sutton interrupts, squeezing her hand when she holds it. "It's going to be okay. Why don't we go upstairs and talk, yeah?"

My girl is looking at me when Sutton stands and tries to tug her along. "Go," I say, giving her the permission she didn't seem to be seeking.

Her shoulders slump. With a soft sigh leaving her lips, she glances away from me and rises onto her feet. She allows Sutton to lead the way upstairs.

I didn't mean to dismiss her or keep her uninvolved, but I knew she wouldn't understand the sacrifice Zayn was willing to make for us. She's too selfless to even let Zayn or Sutton face the consequences of our shitty situation.

JOELLE

I want to sob. I want to feel an emotional release more than anything, but nothing comes out. I must be drained—or a little pissed. No, beyond pissed.

"Sutton, I'm sorry," I began after she sat me down on the bed of her bedroom. "but I can't let Zayn lie for Harry and me. I'm going back downstairs."

"Jo," she says my name with a heavy sigh when I'm about to stand up again. "You think I want Zayn to lie and be caught up in this? Like you, I don't."

I look at the girl I missed talking to. With her hair curlier than ever, I almost want to reach out and touch it and forget that my world isn't imploding right this second. Looking into her brown eyes, I frown softly. "Then why are you letting it happen? I'm sure there's another way—"

"Butterfly, there isn't." She shrugs. "Look, I don't like the situation. Every day I wait for something bad to happen, but if Zayn tells me to trust him, I trust him."

My impulse to get up and head back downstairs has simmered. Still, I don't like the options given. "This safety net," I mention. "From what I understand, it's like having one parachute left but there are two people who have to jump off a plane."

"That's one way to put it," she says with a laugh. "If you're worried about Zayn and me, I promise you it'll be okay. As long as Dante continues to believe Zayn is being loyal to him, we don't need that safety net. You and Harry, on the other hand, do. I mean, for fucks sake, you're Dante's archenemy's granddaughter."

I swallow when her words become overwhelming so quickly. I take a moment to process. "So what do you know about that? I know what Harry has told me but— I didn't have a clue that my grandpa was the leader of this other gang until a few days ago."

Sutton looks away, not in a way where she seems to be hiding something, but as if she's trying to search her memory. "Well I know he died—" Right off the bat, I flinch from the wound. "and that Dante was able to swoop in with his own gang and run the town. I don't quite know much else other than Angelo Veca had murals of him around the city but that Zayn vandalized them... Which is awkward now knowing that you're—"

I break into a stressed and broken laugh. "That's just great, isn't it?" I stand up when my feet feel the need to nervously pace. "I mean, I moved to LA so that I could be closer to him and get to know him since I didn't grow up with him. It's just insane to think that while I was at my granddad's bedside when he was sick he never said, 'Hey, Elle... Before I die, just know that I'm the leader of this gang! Also, don't fall for someone in my rival's gang because it will bite you in the ass.' I mean, he could've warned me!"

The sound of my sigh and my nervous steps are what keeps the room from going quiet.

"Fall? You fell for Harry?" Sutton raises her eyebrows at me, completely skipping over everything else. It's when I stop to look at her. Sutton then says, "By the looks of it, making him jealous worked."

"What?" Suddenly, I'm feeling worked up with a racing beat firing in my chest. "No- I was just saying—"

"Is he your boyfriend now?" She's teasing me. "Please say he is."

"Boyfriend," I repeat in a mumble. "No. I was just saying... I should've said 'involved'. I shouldn't have gotten involved with someone from his rival gang."

Sutton only hums, shrugging off my backtracking. Though, whether I let what I feel slip out or not, the big picture is that I'm drowning. She then tells me, "For what it's worth, take this as a chance to start over. Go somewhere with Harry where you don't have to be a gang leader's granddaughter and where Harry doesn't have to be a member of a gang. It's what I would do if I were you."

I calm down after holding my breath and letting her words sink in. I close my eyes for a split second and start to nod. "Can I use your bathroom?" I ask.

"Of course," she allows, bobbing her head to the right to direct me where the bathroom is.

I step foot into the open door. When the light automatically turns on, I close the door behind me and lock it with a tired groan.

I craved a change in my life for so long. For a while, I had been growing bored with the course I was on. I'm anything but bored now that I'm technically a college dropout and possible fugitive.

I scoff to myself as I look away from my sad expression. I then turn the faucet on to rinse my face for a jolt of some kind of much-needed energy.

There's a knock on the door by the time I shut the faucet off. "Yeah?"

"Are you alright?" It's Harry asking.

Quickly, I pat my face dry with a clean towel and I race time just to open the door and see his face. "Yeah," I say.

He meets my eyes and attempts to study my face. He only hums and says, "We have to make one more stop, so we should go now."

"Wait," I whisper as my hand extends to hold his own. "Come in for a second?"

Without thinking twice about it, he joins me in the bathroom and I'm instantly inclined to wrap my arms around his body. I'm met with warmth and his pleasant scent when he shuts the door behind him and holds me in return.

"What's the matter, angel baby?"

I huff in his arms, gripping at his shirt when I press an ear to his chest. "Where do I fucking start?"

When he chuckles, I can hear it bounce off the walls of his chest and it makes me forget this moment isn't meant to feel blissful. I've never been more scared in my entire life yet a simple laugh from him was just what I needed a dose of.

"Here," he mumbles before undoing his hold on me only to lift me and sit me down on the sink countertop. In one swift movement, he stands in between my legs with hands on my cheek. "Look at me."

I take in his pretty face and gazing eyes. I scrunch my nose when he sparks a feeling in my stomach at the caress of my chin. "I'm looking," I whisper.

He then kisses me and it's an effective way of slowing my racing heartbeat. I cling to him, snaking an arm around his shoulder as the other holds onto his torso when I feverishly kiss him in return.

I hum from his hands on my hips. The moment I feel his fingertips graze underneath my top, I'm like putty in his hands. Because he's so good at helping me forget and showing me what heaven feels like, my next instinct is to kiss his neck. I feel his low groan against my lips as my hands tug at his shirt to pull.

"Jo," he then mumbles.

"Baby," I desperately call him. "Let me take you, right here. I'll be quiet, I promise."

He sucks in a breath with fingers digging into my spread apart thighs. When he dips his head towards my chest, I tug at his hair. "We can't," he mumbles and seals his rejection with a kiss on my neck. "We have to go now and pick up something from the parlor—"

Sighing in disappointment, I then frown. "The parlor?"

"We have to stop there first."

"But what if they're there? Louis or—"

He shakes his head and takes my chin between his thumb and forefinger. Making me look into his eyes, he assures, "No one will be there. It's closed. There's money stored in the parlor that Zayn and I hid, so we have to get it."

It's hard to hold back a groan. "I'm tired," I whisper, letting my head roll back when his fingers have slipped from my chin. When I fix my posture and look at him again, I ask, "After that, will we be flying to Seattle?"

He chuckles. "We won't be flying, darling. We'll be driving there. Now, seriously... I'll tell you more on the way but we have to go already." Helping me jump off the counter, he swings the door open and pulls me out of the bathroom with a handhold.

"Driving?!" I finally repeat as it takes me a second to dread a sixteen-hour drive.

"We can't fly with the amount of cash we're picking up. Besides, we don't have fake passports yet."

I don't have time to question what he has said when I'm following him out of the bathroom, Sutton and Zayn's empty bedroom, and then down the stairs again.

"Be safe," Zayn says the moment we meet at the bottom of the staircase. "Find a way to reach me, just so that I know you guys made it safely."

Harry's nodding, letting go of my hand to clasp his with Zayn's. "Thank you," I hear in a mumble before they then hug each other.

I look at Sutton when I feel her arms pulling me into a hug. I embrace her, closing my eyes as my face gets stuffed into her beautiful curls. "Why are we acting like this is the last time we'll see each other?" I then ask, as if the answer to my question wasn't common sense.

To that, she hugs me tighter. "I bet it won't be the last time, but just in case—" Sutton kisses my cheek. "Love you and I'll miss you!"

Not wanting to let go, I groan when Harry reminds me once again that we have to go. I then tell Sutton, "Just in case, thank you for everything." I pull away from her arm and even though now would be a time where I cry, I'm too drained for my emotional response to even bother.

"You too, Zayn. Thank you," I say to him and I press my lips together to somehow hold from blushing when he looks into my eyes.

"Don't thank me, Butterfly," he calls me and I go in for the hug.

"We have to go, I mean it," Harry then rushes and because of it, I let my arms fall.

"Wait!" I say, only because I've yet to give much attention to Zayn and Sutton's dog. When he's sitting by my legs, I squat down to take his panting face into my hands. I scrunch my nose when the tap of his wagging tail hits the floor.

"Be a good boy, Stark. I wish I could take you with me, yes I do!" When I kiss at the top of his head, I let out a giggle when he drops onto his back for a belly rub.

"Jo—"

"Who's a good boy?!" I talk to Stark, scratching his chest and belly to appreciate the bit of a temporary joy I feel.

It's all over when Zayn whistles and Stark gets back up onto his feet to heel by him. I let out a sigh, looking over at Zayn, but he gives me an apologetic smile. "Fine," I say. "Let's go."

"This way," Harry then says, leading me out to the garage with all our baggage in his hands.

I stop in my tracks, stunned by the sight of a neatly conditioned Mercedes Benz in the shade of lavender purple. As the garage door opens up, I frown when Harry drops our things in the trunk of the vehicle.

"We're taking this car?" I ask.

"We can't take the rental."

I let out a forced laugh. Stepping closer to Harry, I tell him, "Well we can't just take Zayn's car."

"This isn't Zayn's car. It was a piece of crap when I got it," he informs me. "Zayn helped me fix it here and there and I took it to a paint shop not that long ago... Now, get in."

Raising my eyebrows at him, I reach for the handle of the passenger seat. "Okay, well... Wouldn't we be hard to miss in a car like this?"

Getting into the car, Harry starts it up. "Baby," he calls me. When I sit next to him above the white leather seats, he looks at me. "You're asking all the right questions, but believe me when I tell you it'll be alright. We'll keep the top up."

I nod again, allowing myself to trust that he would keep us safe. He then begins to drive out of the garage the moment I get settled. Waving goodbye once more to Zayn and Sutton as they watch us depart, I could only hope I would be able to wave hello again.

We ride in silence, mostly because I feel too numb to talk and maybe Harry is thinking too much. I shiver—out of cold but possibly out of fear as well—when I see the tattoo parlor.

So much has happened since I first stepped foot over the checkered floors of a tattoo shop with hideous red walls.

Harry parks in the alley where I once tried a cigarette with Louis. I huff over the reminder of the same guy who played me and gave me the biggest scare of my life. When I unbuckle and then look down when Harry reaches below my seat. My eyes widen when he pulls out a gun from under it.

As if it was second nature, he loads it without looking. "Just being cautious," he tells me when he's noticed my stare or the worried look in my eye. "Come with me."

I get out of the car, looking around on my way to him. I keep behind him as he enters through the backdoor.

He moves slowly, pointing the gun ahead as he reaches for the light switches. Once fluorescent lights have flickered above, he lowers his gun. Knowing this place more than anyone, he must've not seen anything out of the ordinary. "Close the door behind you," he then gives me an order.

After I close the door and lock it, I follow him into the room where I had first seen and met Dante. Nothing looked different. There was an old desk, an old couch, a dusty table, and the soda machine tucked in the very corner. Having trouble swallowing, I feel uncomfortable when I stare at the couch where Dante made me take something I didn't want to take.

I remember thinking why Harry wasn't helping me that day. I remember thinking he was just as horrible when in reality he was only trying to survive.

As Harry tucks his gun behind in the waistband of his jeans, he looks at me.

"What?" I whisper, trying to act like this place doesn't faze me.

"Looks like you've seen a ghost."

I laugh, deciding to take a footstep further into the room. "No. Just looking at the memories that are jumping at me right now."

Knowing the kind of memories I'm referring to, his eyes shift towards the closet door he told me to hide in then towards the couch where I was placed after fucking up. "We'll get out of here in a few, I promise."

"It's fine. Take—" I pause when he walks to another corner in the room to collect a baseball bat.

"The money is inside the soda machine," Harry says, bringing the baseball bat up to rest it over his shoulder. "Come have a crack at it?"

"Huh?"

"Break it open," he repeats and then points the bat at me to grab.

I bite my lip when the thought to destroy becomes much more appealing by the second. Instead of grabbing the bat, I reach for my hair to tie it all back. I'm able to secure a bun without a hair tie. Finally, I take the bat from Harry.

Looking at the soda machine before me, the opportunity to let go of all my inner rage excites me. The soda machine glows in a daunting shade of red from the plastic cover. The noise of the refrigeration becomes more distinct, too, over the sudden focus I have on it.

"Go ahead. Scream if you have to, babe."

I release a groan instead when I swing the bat at full force. Only causing a crack on the cover with the picture of a well-known soda brand, I don't halt. I swing again and again to the point where I forget why I'm breaking this soda machine open in the first place. I've broken through the plastic, feeling myself pant when I no longer have the energy to keep on going.

Dropping the bat at my feet, I look at Harry who looks back at me with a grin. "Did I do it?" I ask, lifting my hand to fan the sudden sweat off of me.

He then steps closer to the broken machine. "Sure," he says as he opens the cover I had focused all my rage on like a door. With only a few soda cans lined up in the racks, there were more rolls of cash tucked inside than anything else.

I huff. "You're telling me you could've just opened it before you made me do that?"

"Yeah," he admits. "I just wanted you to let go a bit."

Still panting, I can't help but laugh. "If that was your goal, you should've just fucked me senseless."

He smirks at me, taking a soda can from off a rack. "There's an empty bag in the closet. Mind bringing it, sweet girl?"

I roll my eyes, letting my hands fall from my hips as I turn to get him what he's asked. I hear him open a can behind me as I make it to the closet that seemed so much smaller the time I was forced into it. I sigh, not wasting my time visiting my memory, and I find an empty backpack. "Here," I say when I take it to him.

He takes the backpack after I take his soda can. As I watch him fill it with the rolls of what looks to be endless money, I take a sip of his flavored strawberry soda.

Stuffing the bag full, he finally zips it up and throws a strap over his shoulder. "Let's get the hell away from here." Drawing the gun from behind him, he leads the way again. I follow him out of the room after setting the soda can I gulped back on top of the desk.

"I'm ready," I mumble, wanting to laugh over my will to easily leave everything behind. Never did I think I would put my fate in Harry's hands, but he's the only person on my side. The only person I need on my side.

We made it to the car. Handing me the backpack of money, I take it from Harry and tuck it underneath my seat. I then buckle up as I look around to be cautious of our surroundings again. It isn't long before he speeds out of the alley.

"To Seattle?"

"To Seattle."

___

On the two-lane road of the I-5, it's like he owns the road from the way cars switch lanes to clear the way for him. I know it's basic road etiquette, but it's the way he drives with one hand on the wheel and with the other on my thigh. It's also the way the sky has turned purple in the shade of this car and the way his beautiful hair flows with the top down.

It's crazy to think we were in Mexico less than twenty-four hours ago. To also think we'll be driving all through California is hard to fathom when I've never done anything like this before. I've never experienced a road trip. I've never been in a car longer than six hours and I thank whichever God is out there for making this experience so far all right. I wasn't going to let the reason for this sudden trip taint what I feel at this very moment.

Serene.

If the colors in the sky weren't changing, I would think time has stopped. I wouldn't mind driving all night with the music blaring so loud. It's not like we'd be disturbing anybody when the I-5 is filled with evergreen fields.

"How are you holding up?" Harry asks me the moment a song on the radio had come to an end. He lowers down the volume before the next song can even begin.

"I'm fine," I say, reading my head back as my eyes land above his hand on my thigh. "How about you? Tired of driving yet? I can drive—"

"I'm not tired yet," he says. "But I'm thinking we can find a hotel or something in a few. I want you to rest well."

I want to argue and tell him I'd rather not rest, but maybe being able to be held by him appeals to me way more. With a nod, I give in and extend my arm out just so I can play with his hair. "Fine," I say, but I doubt he heard.

I turn my head when I faintly hear the song that's playing. I go ahead and turn the volume back up and the music doesn't fail to remind me of another memory.

Come on Eileen.

I might have a shit-eating grin on my face at the thought of a past hookup. I try to be subtle, but Harry glances over at me before I could cover my expression with the back of my hand.

"What? You love this song, too?"

"Don't you?" I raise an eyebrow.

He shrugs. "I feel like there's so much going on."

"Nonsense!" I practically yell before bringing my hands together to clap along to the beat. "Ready? One-two-one-two-three, come on Eileen! Oh, I swear what he means!"

I smile wide when my singing has caused a laugh to slip from his heavenly lips. "At this moment, you mean everything!" I then nudge him and shout, "Sing! I know you know the words."

"I really don't."

"Verge on dirty, ah... Come on, Eileen," I sing, lifting my arms under the grandeur of orangey-pink skies while he speeds.

Biting my lip, I look over at him. I smile when his finger is tapping along to the beat, giving in to the rhythm he was stubborn about.

"I love this part the most," I comment when we approach the bridge of the song. Clapping my hands again, I sing, "Come on Eileen, too loo rye ay, come on Eileen, too loo rye—"

Again, I catch a smile on his pretty face as I glance over. I giggle, settling down as the song moves at a faster tempo. I extend my arm out the open window, looking out as I notice a shift in scenery. With no more acres of green fields in sight, I see patches of dry land, lonely houses, and a sign that reads 'Gas Station. Five Miles Ahead.'

He lowers the volume down again. "We're going to stop by a store to pick up some essentials before going to a hotel. Then we can maybe grab something to eat."

"Yes, sir," I tease as I turn my attention to the setting sun.

The sky has turned darker—indigo—by the time Harry takes an exit. Driving past a few gas stations, he then pulls into an empty lot of a general merchandise store. I sit up, unbuckling by the time he has parked. Since it's getting cold, he brings the top back up of his convertible car.

I get out of the car, throwing the backpack strap over my shoulder as I shut the door. Immediately, I stretch. I hadn't realized how much I needed a walk until now. I then smile when he comes around to take my hand.

"Grab whatever you want," he tells me.

"Whatever I want?" I laugh.

"Want, need, please," he adds with a shrug.

I nod, though already telling myself I wouldn't go overboard despite how much money there is in the backpack I hold.

As we step into the store, I grab a cart. I then slip the backpack off my shoulder and place it inside when a security guard greets me. I smile back before walking along Harry's side through the store. "Do you want to split up?" I suggest.

"No," he quickly shuts down.

"But it'll be easier. We can meet up by the registers."

"I think it's better if we stay together." He follows me this time as I lead the way.

"Okay, fine. If you want me to protect you, just say so," I tease again, flashing him a grin as I push the cart towards the personal care section.

Toothbrushes, toothpaste, mouthwash, dental floss, et cetera... We fill the cart with other essentials and it seems as if we've tossed something from each aisle into the cart.

"That's really cute," I then say when we stumble upon the clothing section of the store. I push the cart towards the red summer dress. Taking one off the rack, I bring the dress over my body and I turn around to show Harry. "What do you think?"

He looks at me, really looks at me. "Pretty," he whispers. "If you don't take it, I'll be upset."

His comment makes me laugh. "I wouldn't want that," I say, stepping forward to drop the red dress into the cart. "You're scary when you're upset."

I don't pay attention to how he reacts to my tease. I turn when I see more cute clothing. From more sundresses to flattering jeans, cardigans, and basic wear crop tops, I tend to go overboard when I said I wouldn't.

We head to the register with a full cart. Riding the cart like a scooter, Harry expresses that he doesn't want me to fall. As if his overprotectiveness hasn't been showing all day, it still comes as a surprise to think my safety worries him.

"Alright, alright," I say with a smile when I stop my tired shenanigans.

Over three hundred dollars later, we're pushing the cart through the cold night. Helping him load the bags into the trunk, he has that frown on his face again. I don't know what it is about the expression he holds, but I know he's in his head. "Talk to me," I say to him.

"Hm?"

"What are you thinking about? Talk to me," I repeat, closing the trunk.

"We should head to a hotel now."

He's about to walk away from me, but I reach for his wrist with the red bracelet that matches mine. "Harry, look up," I then say.

"What?"

I look up for him as I lean against the back of the car. I then feel him shift, closing the gap between us and he finally looks up to see the stars with me.

"Remember the stars that were hidden in the city or on the beach in Mexico? They're here," I tell him with a laugh. I then look at him as he remains struck by the lights in the sky. "So now is not the time to be closed off."

He hums when I softly kiss over his throat. He looks back down to meet my gaze. "It's just... Nothing ever goes my way."

My hands ride up his arms. "I'm sorry," I whisper as my hands then meet behind his neck.

"Don't be," he whispers back. "I've accepted that it is what it is, but now that I have you—"

As he pauses in his words, I can feel that thump in my chest again. Dark eyes never shined so bright as they poured into mine. "You're afraid."

"I've been pretending that I'm not."

I know.

He continues, "I've been trying not to fucking think about how badly this could end, Jo."

"That makes the two of us."

"In the store, when I put razors and shaving cream in the cart, the only thing I was worried about was the fact that I have to shave in case I meet your parents. You know, to make a good impression," he spills, admitting thoughts he probably never planned to share with me. "Then I realized, there are bigger things to fucking worry about, you know?"

"Harry," I try to comfort him with a soft tone. With what he's said, I don't know where to begin.

"It's clear—" he talks again. "So fucking clear of just how badly I feel for you."

I forget how to swallow. Maybe his feelings for me are evident with just how much he's risking by being here with me, but to hear it out loud—I don't think I'm prepared for it.

"But I'm afraid, Jo. The minute it becomes real, the minute I tell you all the things I crave to tell you, it will be taken from me."

He shivers and so do I from just how cold it feels tonight. "I get it," I assure as he's so vulnerable in my arms. "We have the same fears. I mean, I've been burned before. Though, we can't let these fears prevent us from going on. If you're anxious about meeting my parents, allow yourself to."

He releases a breath that I don't think he knew he was holding. "How can't I be fucking anxious when they're going to hate me," he says and finally, I hear his laugh.

I grin. "Well, I can't guarantee they won't."

"Doesn't matter, though," he mumbles as he pulls me into a hug. "Not when we're getting the hell out of here after you see your parents."

I only hum, closing my eyes when I hug him back tightly. "Maybe we can face our fears together in Paris," I say and I mean to whisper it, but he hums back in agreement.

"Then Italy?"

"Then Japan."

There's a moment of silence as if our whispers were only dreams and not guarantees. Breaking it, Harry says, "Let's head to a hotel now." Before I can agree with a nod, he kisses my cheek once, then twice and finally his lips find mine.

—

again, thank you so much for reading!!

p.s. i know it's taken me forever to update lately, so if anyone is confused or has forgotten: Finnegan (Finny) was the guy stalking Jo and Harry in Las Vegas in chapters 30-40. he's baaaaaack!

love you and omg sorry if this was underwhelming, i'm trying!!

lovee,
mila!