What if... Anirudh realized his feelings for Bondita during the Sanyasini track itself? That too after going through a lot of introspection.
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"Main apna jeevan aapke naam kar chuki hu Sakha Babu"
"Ab tak main poori tarah se berang nahi hui hu.
Aapke naam ka rang mere saanson mein ghula hua hai"
All these words which she uttered last night were ringing in my mind on loop. What does she even mean by it? Since childhood, she knew how to make me agree to things even if I don't want to. She knew how to play with words and spill out my feelings which I try to cage.
"Pehle keh nahi paayi. Par ek rang ye bhi hai mujhme, main pyaar karti hu aapse"
This girl has gone insane. She made me spill out those words and feelings which doesn't even exist anywhere in me. Neither in my mind, nor in my heart. However this heart, or, rather I should say, this stoned-heart has stopped beating years ago and thus, it doesn't have the capability to love. Love. Hmpf! The worst feeling ever. It does nothing but snatch everything. This enmity itself is a consequence of love.
"Wo pyaar hi toh tha jo mujhe Vaijayanti banakar yaha laaya"
This Love thing made my Barrister Bondita, a Sanyasini. How can I explain her? She is so adamant that she made me confess the thing that does not even exist inside me. I'm scared she won't get so blinded that she may put her life at stake. Yes, its true that I somewhere still care about her. Afterall she used to be my Bondita.
But that doesn't mean I love her.
I was unable to focus on my work. The file is kept open in front of me and indeed I was looking into it but I couldn't read a single word. "Ye kya ho raha hai? Kisi cheeze mein mann kyu nahi lag raha?" I uttered myself.
Today what she did was too much! Just to show her adamancy, she walked over the glass. On the top of that, she again tried to make me confess those stupid feelings that doesn't exist in me. That too in front of the entire villagers! "Ye ladki sachme pagal ho gayi hai."
"Tumhare pyaar mein." I heard a familiar voice someone saying this. I turned to look at my right side. Oh Gosh! He's back again. Ofcourse the voice had to be familiar because it was mine after all, who stood there wearing his barrister robe. My conscience!
I looked at him with a stern expression. "Aise kya dekh rahe ho? Oh! Samajh gaya. Bohot saalon baad apne aap se mulaaqaat ho rahi hai na?" I didn't respond but just looked back to my file. Argh! Why am I unable to focus?
"Mann kaise lagega, kyuki apna mann toh kahi aur chhod aaye ho tum" he spoke up with a kind of mocking look "Kya... kya matlab hai tumhara? Apna kaam kar raha hu na main." I stammered yet defended myself. "File ulti pakadke?" He snapped. That's when I realized I have been holding the file upside down. I kept the file away to hide my embarrassment.
"Bondita ke baare mein soch rahe ho na?" He said with a slight smirk. I wish I could just pull out my trigger and shoot him away but unfortunately, that was of no use.
"Toh maardo goli." He said nonchalantly. Wait, did I think that aloud? "Par mujhe nahi, apne aap ko. Apne andar ke iss Barrister Babu wale khadoos roop ko. Aur waapis bann jaao uske Birristra Babu."
I was really trying hard to ignore him but by the time the other maniac in the Tennis attire appeared with a teasing smile. "Hi" he waved. Now what the hell was he going to utter? "Agar Bondita ke liye koi chinta hi nahi hai, toh aaj uski madad kyu ki? Kyu apne hatho se haldi lagayi aur khana khilaya? Aaj tak kitne jaasoos pakde gaye hai par Bondita ke liye ye khaas khaatirdaari aur chinta kyu?" He uttered rotating the racket in teasing way.
Bloody hell! Should I forget that there's something called humanity? Wait, why I'm I sounding like Batuk? Damn these two will drive me crazy.
"Oh main batata hu" the Barrister conscience uttered and continued pointing his finger towards me "isse pata hai ki Bondita koi jaasoos nahi hai. Iska ye madad karna, uski chinta karna, it's nothing but his guilt." This sentence pricked my heart. Were they right? Is this just my guilt?
"No it's not." The one in sports attire replied. I guess I'm actually thinking too loudly. He continued "Ye sirf tumhara pachtava nahi, balki..." he paused and looked at that black bat.
Then they both looked at me and said together "Pyaar hai"
I looked at them with a shocked expression. No. This is not true. I think my face must have drained out its colour by now after hearing this nonsense. Are my consciences possessed with Bondita's spirit?"
"Haa. Tum pyaar karne lage ho Bondita se. Aur..."
"Bas karo!" I yelled. In no time, I stormed out the study, and ran towards the balcony.
As soon as I reached there, I saw the ashram opposite the haveli where I could see Bondita doing something. I don't know why but I was unable to take my eyes off from her. All these days I was struggling to not even have a glimpse of her but now, I'm unable to take my eyes off her.
Suddenly I fell something near my feet. "Tring Tring" I heard a sweet voice. Turning back I looked down and saw a coconut shell attached with string. "Halu, Sakha Babu? Main choti Bondita bol rahi hu" I saw my little Bondita approaching carrying the other end of her telinoof.
"Bondita?" I turned behind unable to understand what exactly is happening with me. I turned behind to find her staring at me with her hands on waist. I couldn't stop myself to chuckle. "Aise kyu dekh rahe the Bondita ko?" She asked pointing towards the present Bondita in the ashram.
I stammered a bit and said "Ku..kuch bhi toh nahi. Wo to main bas yu hi..." "Ye kya!" She exclaimed all of a sudden pointing towards my face. I touched my cheeks to check if something was there. "Kya?" I asked her not finding anything. "Aapke gaal toh lal ho gaye hai!" What? Where I thought I lost the colour of my face, she's claiming it to have turned red.
"Bondita ko dekhke gaal kyu laal ho rahe hai aapke?" I again touched my cheeks. I could feel a certain warmth. "Pata hai? Mere bhi hote the. Par kyu, ye samajh nahi aata tha. Choti thi na." I watched myself on the reflection of the glass door. I could feel a tinch of scarlet appeared on my skin. I turned towards the ashram. I saw her moving towards the pot which was outside the threshold of entrance. Her hair strands which were loosened out of her plaited hair were flying with the breeze.
I could feel my heart beat increasing all of a sudden. No it wasn't because I ran till here. It was due to something else. "Badh rahi hai kya dhadkane?" She asked "Haa" I replied without thinking twice. I was so lost that I didn't realize what I was uttering. "Meri bhi hoti thi!" She screamed all of a sudden which made me snap out of my long lost world.
"Par kyu hote the?" I don't know why am I even asking such stupid questions. She tapped her chin with her forefinger and uttered "Pata nahi. Choti thi na. Par aap chote thodi hai. Aapko toh pata hona chahiye na?" "Kya pata hona chahiye?" I asked irritably tired of this introspection and turned around.
"Bondita?" I was waiting for her answer. Not getting any reply I again turned but she was nowhere to be found. She was disappeared leaving me with pool of thoughts. Wow great!
I saw Bondita coming out of the ashram and moving towards the nearby house. "Boudi. Zara paani milega?" She asked the lady who was about to close the door of her house. Probably she found our haveli's gates closed otherwise she must have asked her Bhari Babu. "Hum kisi jaasoos ki madad nahi karte. Dafa ho jaao yaha se" saying this the lady shutted the door.
My heart is paining seeing her like this. I rushed inside the kitchen to fetch a jug of water. Thank God this Bihari's wife is sleeping. Urgh! She's snoring loudly. Just like her husband. Never mind. I'll have to rush now with this jug. She must be thirsty. Her pot must be probably empty and I know that nobody will be giving her even a drop to drink.
I slowly tiptoed towards the ashram. And kept the jug near the threshold "Paani laaya hu." I said standing outside facing backwards. Its really difficult for me to see her like this. She must be probably back without getting water from anyone. "Pee lo. Pyaas lagi hogi" I uttered no getting any reply. Wait. Why isn't she replying? By now she should have started with her nonsense blabbering about love and all. Is she okay?
"Bondita?" I called her looking inside. No reply. Without wasting a moment I went inside but she was not there. My heart started beating rapidly.
"Sakha Babu!" I heard a faint scream from back side of the ashram. I rushed there only to find a terrifying scene.
"BONDITA!"
Hey guys!
I couldn't hold myself writing this crap😅
If you found this TS okay, then plz lemme know as I'm trying this for the first time 😋
Next part will be updated soon.
Love,
Ammy💜