HIII!
so today I'm gonna rant (well not really rant more like talk) about the one thing that effects us all at some point: anxiety. But I'm also gonna kinda talk about the difference between being nervous and being anxious
Now I'm gonna say it straight out: it's natural to feel anxious. Like with things such as a solo in a song, your role in the play, giving a presentation in front of the class....of course you'll get a little NERVOUS. It's cause you're being put out of your comfort zone, and you might be alone in what you're doing...and of course you're worried about doing a good job and not messing up etc. etc.
now here's the difference between being nervous and being anxious...
Nervous: okay...i got the butterflies in my stomach...okay deep breath....alright, I can do this...I can totally do this....alright here we go!
Anxious: oh my god....nope nope nope I can't do this....I'm shaking too much way too much....ugh my stomach feels terrible....god what if I mess up? What if they laugh at me? I'll be the laughing stock of the class? I can't do this. I really can't. I feel lightheaded, nauseous, oh god please don't let me do this please.
I don't know if that's accurate enough...but I guess I'm also gonna end up talking anxiety disorders.
see there ARE different types of anxiety disorders like OCD for example (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder). OCD is sorta common, however it's found in different levels. For some people it's more about being extremely organized, or they're really picky about germs and whatnot. But for others, it's a constant overdrive of things having to be JUST perfect, and if it's not it might be the end of the world.
some people have social anxiety, and it's when someone may have the fear of social situations and scenarios. people who have this disorder are scared of being in social situations because they're afraid they'll be humiliated, they'll make some sort of mistake, etc. they may even have thought of the social situation in ADVANCE and have therefore feared it
truth is not many people take anxiety seriously as they think it's just "being nervous". when in reality its nowhere near that.
anxiety disorders are mental illnesses. and mental illnesses are just as bad as physical illnesses.
i know what it's like to have this anxiety. trust me, i get stomach churns constantly, especially if there's an upcoming test, project or if there's stress from other sources. i find that i'm often jumping to conclusions and i find i'm thinking of the worst possible things that could happen and i'm overthinking constantly and in the end i'm hurting myself...
and when i say stomach churns i don't mean a stomach ache....it's like my stomach is just clenching and as if everything in my stomach looks like the inside of a blender....it's all getting swirled around and around and it makes me sick. and i can't do anything about it. the only thing i can do is try and take myself away from whatever stressful situation i'm in....which is almost never the case (i.e presenting in class)
i find that people don't really understand anxiety and just confuse it with "being nervous" because in reality it's not really like that...
here's what anxiety is like:
You wake up in the morning. Part of you doesn't wanna go to school but you have to convince yourself you have to, because you have four subjects this semester and you can't miss one because you're already doing bad enough as it is...and missing a day would be another weight on your shoulders anyways. You barely got any sleep the night before, which isn't a surprise, but you get ready and head to school. Your parent decided to drive you to school and they start talking and of course you remember that you have an upcoming math test that you're extremely worried for and you try not to think about it but it keeps popping back in your head. you're trying to remember if you actually packed everything and if you did your homework correctly. your parent is talking about how you need to bring good marks and you feel your stomach churn, as you try to smile before you head into school.
the school day isn't any better. your teacher called on you in class and you panicked, because you didn't know what the answer was, and embarassed yourself in front of everyone. you tapped your pencil the rest of class in an effort to not completely break down into tears, but your teacher told you to stop so you're left tapping your foot instead, shaking slightly.
lunch is terrible, because your friends went out, but they didn't bother to wait for you so you're alone at school and you're finishing the science homework you couldn't finish up last night, and you can sense people staring at you as you sit alone but you try to ignore it and try and focus on whatever you're attempting to copy down from the textbook.
^^idk if that's good enough but basically that's some of the stuff
the problem with that though is that people might call it a "bad day" or that again you're "nervous" but anxiety isn't just being extremely nervous over some things....it's about being extremely nervous ALL THE TIME.
hopefully this sheds some light on this kind of stuff that way if you think that you have any of the symptoms of an anxiety disorder you can always go to the doctor and explain this stuff. they usually know what to look for, and they do a pretty good job in diagnosing (at least i think they do but they go to school for like ten years to do this stuff so yeah)
happy easter weekend peeps!
xx