- 02 -
NOVEMBER 12, 1991
The day you left was pleasantly warm, surprising considering it was already far into autumn. The soft breeze that did flow through the hangar blew stray pieces of your hair around, fluttered the fabric of your jacket about you. The sun was shining warmly too, kissing your skin goodbye it seemed.
You wouldn't be seeing much of it in the near future.
"I'll be alright dad." You insisted for the thousandth time as your father squeezed you tight in a crushing hug again. You squeaked as your lungs became desperate for air, he was a strong guy, though absolutely harmless to those he loved. "Dad!" You protested once more.
He let go at last, a small smile on his face. He looked like an older version of your brother. Grey kissing his dark hair, crinkles and creases on his face from years of stress and laughter. "Sorry kiddo." He said, voice as strong as ever.
But the bravest man you knew suddenly didn't look too brave. No, the only thing he held in his eyes that looked much like your own was worry for you, and tears.
You had only seen your father cry twice in your life. When his wife, your mother, died after a long and hard battle with an illness no one could cure. And now, now that he was wishing you away on your mission he had tears his his eyes.
"I'll be alright." You insisted with a smile, you too could feel tears pricking your eyes. "It'll only be three months and I'll be back in time to celebrate the New Year with you." You clutched his hands, worn and strong from years of honorable service.
It seemed to be a family tradition, to serve your country. Your great-grandfather had fought in World War I, your grandfather in World War II. Your father had served on multiple occasions in multiple locations, most of which were classified still.
He retired only when he was severely injured on the battlefield, losing his left leg from the knee down. That was one of the happiest days of your life, not because he was hurt, but because you knew he would finally be safe at home.
Pain only makes you stronger, he would say. And it did make him so much stronger, he never gave up and pushed through all the new challenges he faced with a missing limb. You took that little piece of advice with you everywhere.
You were just a teenager when he retired, your mom died only five years later, only six months ago.
But now here you were, all grown up at the age of twenty-two, ready to serve your country in a different way.
You were a good fighter, taught to hold your own well in training. S.H.E.I.L.D. required that all it's employees had these skills as the job got dangerous on occasion. You were a scrappy thing, managing to take down even some of the bigger guys in training.
You never could stomach the idea of killing someone though. But if it was life or death on the field, you were sure you would make the right call.
You were always more apt to technology anyway, which as the years past was starting to develop into something truly amazing. Being an agent for the biggest espionage, special law enforcement, and counter-terrorism agency honed both fighting and technology together perfectly for you.
Perhaps that's why S.H.E.I.L.D chose you for this mission. You were young, it was the nineties, and not a lot of agents were used to the prospect of advancing change. They needed someone who was, so here you were, ready for your fist solo mission, ever.
The hangar was bustling with preparation for the assignment.
The jet that was to take you to the location stood sturdy as the main focal point. On the side the giant eagle logo was painted proudly, Strategic Homeland Intervention Enforcement and Logistics Division wrapped around it in a circle.
A military grade utility vehicle was being loaded into the cargo hold, along with several boxes of supplies. All the things you would need for three months would have to fit in the vehicle eventually, but for now it was all stored into the jet.
As for your clothes and personal belongings, all those had to fit in a medium sized duffle bag that rested on your hip. You packed practical, comfortable, and warm clothes, anything you could stuff in.
Along with your clothes and a small pack of toiletries, you had a collection of photos tucked away. All your favourites featuring your brother, dad, and mom. Full family pictures, pictures of you and your friends. Pictures that brought you joy, reminded you of happy times.
Pictures that reminded you of home.
It was going to be a lonely three months, you figured it be nice to at least see the faces of the ones you love.
The only other memento you brought from home was a necklace, that currently hug around your neck. A stunning, tiny, tear drop shaped garnet hanging off a chain of gold that fell just below your clavicle. It used to be your mothers, but now it was yours to cherish.
You clutched the gem wistfully as you gazed back at your father, who had let one of the tears in his eyes run down his cheek.
"I'm proud of you kiddo." He said, you had waited a long time for him to say those words to you. "Your mom would be too." His voice was a whisper.
You lost it, throwing your arms around him, finally bursting into tears as well. "I miss her." You muttered into his shoulder. "I'm going to miss you."
His hands rubbed soothing circles on your back, hushing you to calmness once more. "She loved you so much, I love you so much." He told you, voice only cracking the slightest bit. "But if anyone can succeed on this mission, it's my little girl."
You laughed pulling away from him. "They're only sending me because I'm the only one who can use a USB properly."
Your father's eyes twinkled merrily. "See, UMEs must be very important then if only the greatest agent in the world can operate them."
You shook your head, chuckling. "USB dad, it's USB." You corrected the older man, who had no idea how to use technology. "And I am no where near the greatest agent in the world."
Your dad laughed too, then looked to you seriously. "Really though, Kiddo. Fury would not have selected you for this assignment if he didn't know you were capable enough." His words made you feel a bit better. "And I mean who wouldn't choose one of my kids, we Carr's are resilient."
He was right, your ancestors had survived every war in history, proving the Abernathy's were in fact very resilient. Maybe they were just lucky, maybe some victory goddess was looking out for you all, maybe it was just chance-- who knows.
Maybe you would be the first to fail...
Suddenly, interrupting your moment with your father, another figure came barreling out of nowhere. Almost knocking you down, they scooped you up squeezing you just as tight as your father did.
"Charlie!" You squeaked at your younger, but much larger brother. "You came!" He wasn't supposed to be able to, he was supposed to be all the way in Fort Jackson.
He released you to let you breathe, smiling wide. "I couldn't let you go without saying goodbye, besides I have the day off." He said, as if it was nothing to drive all the way from South Carolina to New York State.
"You're insane." You hugged him again, thankful he did make he trip. You didn't know when you'd see him again.
Your brother looked like the younger version of your father. They had the same dark hair, bellowing laugh, and much of the same personality. He had you mother's eyes though, deep brown, and as warm as the sun. He had her smile and easy going attitude too, their smiles alone could light up a room, a skill you were secretly envious of.
Though Charlie, or Charles Jr. as his official title, was your little brother, he had grown far past your height. He was almost twenty now, but had become strong and lean from his diligent military training. He looked so grown up standing in front of you in his olive coloured uniform, so different from the eight year old who used to wear his little superhero outfit around everywhere-- though he still had the same dazzling smile.
Your little family, back together again, only to be ripped apart again in a moment.
But for now at least, all was well. Your dad was here, your baby brother was here, your mother was even here in spirit. And for that moment at least, you were happy. All fear and worry you had previously possessed dissipated, replaced only by a smile.
"I love you guys." You said, hugging them both at once. A moment of bliss, and then it all fell apart.
A very important looking group came marching into the hangar, Director Fury flanked with a handful of agents. And the three of you untangled yourselves at once, standing at attention in your respective ways, all wearing your uniforms of your agencies proudly.
Fury came to a stop in front of you all, he saluted along with you father and brother, and then relaxed. "Nice to see you Colonel Carr." He nodded to your father, who he knew from past dealings. "You as well, Private Carr." He nodded to your brother.
His heavy gaze then landed on you, his dark eyes seeming to stare into your soul. Director Fury was an intimidating man, though easily likeable. He walked around in all black all the time, scaring the masses. He really was a fair and just man, and apparently his better judgement saw you fit to do this mission on your own. He was new to the director position too, and was still getting used to having this much authority you supposed, maybe that's why he made such a bold choice.
Fury spoke to you at last, voice only slightly ominous. "Are you ready, Agent Carr?"
You gulped, but held your steady stance. "As ready as I'll ever be."
He smiled slightly, gesturing to the now roaring jet. "Then after you."
You turned back towards your family one last time, a sad smile on your face. "I'll see you both soon, okay?"
You hugged your brother first, who held the tears in his eyes back with a sniff. "You be careful out there." He warned you.
"You be careful too." You said, knowing he would soon be shipped out on the field as well. "And for the love of god, do not grow any taller!" You laughed, as you had to go on your tiptoes to ruffle his hair up.
Charlie fixed his hair with a huff as you went to hug your father.
Your dad's arms wrapped around you tightly, holding you for the last time it seemed. After a moment of quiet, he spoke into your ear so softly, you doubted anyone else could hear his whispers.
He spoke as if he had a great secret to tell, that only you could know. "Remember this, when you are all alone out there, about ready to give up, just barely holding on." He spoke as if he knew this feeling strongly, as if it was an old friend of his. "Remember that pain only makes you stronger. If you get knocked down, get right back up again. If you feel like you want to let go, don't you dare. You just keep on pushing, you hear me?"
He pulled back then, eyes revealing for a moment to shattered soul that resided inside. "You can do this." He said, his tone revealed he meant it with every fiber of his being. "You can do this because I believe in you. You can do this because my kids are the strongest kids around." His hand gripped your shoulder, and your brother's, with the firmness and steadiness all great father's posses.
Charlie had been waiting to hear those words for years, as had you. It was rare to hear your father speak so strongly, and so proudly, it was rare for him to express his true emotions.
"Oh, dad." You flung your arms around him once more, kissing his cheek affectionately one last time. "Thank you, for everything."
He didn't say another word as you kissed Charlie's cheek too, he merely gazed at the two of you proudly.
At last, you turned to board the jet with Fury and the other agents. You could see the two of them standing back from the jet through the window. Your brother wiping your kiss of his face with a playful scowl, your father with his hands folded formally in front of him.
I love you both. You mouthed to them, they must have seen you because they both nodded, wide smiles gracing both their features.
You got this. Your father mouthed. Your brother just waved like a small child. With one last wistful mile at your little family, the jet finally took off into the unknown.
Fury appeared behind you suddenly, a hand rested on your shoulder. Through the gentle gesture, you could feel his empathy. He too knew it was hard to say goodbye to all one knows. "Get comfortable agent, take a rest, it's going to be a long flight."
---
The Winter solider slept soundly, unknowing of the activity flurrying around him in his icy chambers. About a dozen important HYDRA researchers scurried about him, adjusting settings, making notes, testing conditions. They were preparing to wake him after an entire decade, they had to make sure the environment was just right.
There could be some internal decay, the chamber could not transition effectively, the Winter Solider could come out just a normal man if his programed mind had not been preserved properly. The list was endless with a variety of unknown variables, they only thing they determined was that the body inside the tank was in fact alive.
It had been a long time since he was awake, who knew what they were going to discover.
The doors to the dimly lit lab suddenly burst open, an important looking man flanked by four soldiers marched in.
All the scientists turned to him at once, eyes wide, freezing in their tracks. Everyone in the compound knew who this man was, everyone who was affiliated with HYDRA knew who this man was. He inspired fear in the bravest of souls, shook soldiers at the knees. He was ruthless, demanding, and calculating. His brawn was only matched by his brain and devious ways.
He took in the cold, damp lab with eyes of venomous green. The sneer on his cracked lips revealed his prominent distaste of his surroundings. He wasn't very pleased with supplies his predecessor had left him, but HYDRA-- now risen from the ashes-- was making due.
"How far along are we from waking it." HYDRA's current leader, Commander Volkov, barked gruffly. No one knew his first name, he was only ever known as Volkov, or Commander, or Commander Volkov.
Volkov only ever considered the Winter Solider to be a killing machine, much like any other weapon, and thus he never called him a human being. Most HYDRA employees thought the same of the poor, shelled man.
"We have merely hours now until a SHIELD agent will be present in our territories." Volkov announced, pressing on. He had gotten this information from a reliable inside man, a rising agent he had taken under his wing. "I need it awake and running now!"
Some girl was supposed to be arriving to watch them for a few months. Her main mission was to insert a drive into their system, a drive that could end all that HYDRA had built up again. Volkov was not going to let that happen, and so he needed the Winter Solider to take her down.
Sure, he could get any solider to do it, but the Winter Solider was a bit more reliable than the rest-- after all, he could control every inch of him.
A timid looking scientist approached Volkov then, clipboard in hand. Doctor Maksim his name tag read. Doctor Maksim resembled a rat, Volkov thought.
"Sir, we've run about a hundred tests, but we have no idea what condition the solider will be in when he awakes." Maksim was generally more apt to use actual human pronouns for the Winter Solider. Maksim paused a moment, glancing down at the clipboard for reassurance. "Though he was well preserved the last decade HYDRA went under, waking days are still sensitive for him."
Volkov took in the man standing before him, eyes searching him for every weakness. "Sensitive?" He mused thoughtfully. "You act like it has feelings. We control the Winter Solider, we tell it what to do. It is a machine capable of killing the most skilled, and if you aren't careful doctor-- I'll have him kill you too."
There was a long pause, Doctor Maksim gulped. "Well, we will have to condition him again, to be sure he really did stay the way he was supposed to. We'll have to take a look at the functions of his cerebrum, both the frontal, and the optical lobe..." He trailed off, reading Volkov's bored expression as clear as day. "Moral of the story, commander, is that we have to make sure the Winter Solider is in fact still the Winter Solider."
Volkov's eyes darkened at this, and he spoke with a voice colder than any Russian winter. "If even a whisper of that damned American solider is still inside him, flush it out with every thing you've got. If it means you have to crack his skull open again, so be it. If it means you have to tear his brain apart, you will. Just make sure he doesn't slip, or this will be on you doc."
Volkov spun on his heel, marching out the doors he came, still flanked by his four body guards. "You have one week to prepare him." He called back. And he was gone.
Doctor Gabriel Maksim turned to the still resting Winter Solider at last, the other scientists watched him as if he was the bravest man in he world for having to talk to Volkov.
He let out a sigh, watery blue eyes drooping with fatigue. "That's a wrap for today, everyone take a rest, we have a lot of work to do in the days ahead." And so, everyone except Maksim exited without protest.
Now in the lab alone, Doctor Maksim approached the sleeping man, a folder in hand.
The Winter Solider, for now at least, didn't look too terrifying. Besides his strong stature and slightly intimidating features, he was much like any ordinary man. Quite frankly, he looked like a corpse in a glass casket, the only visible sign he was even alive was the small rising and falling of his chest.
Gabriel Maksim opened the folder he held, he had read it a hundred times, but he just wanted to go through it again-- just to be sure.
James Buchanan Barnes
Born March 10, 1917 Brooklyn, New York
Member of the 107th infantry.
The folder went on to explain all else in full detail. HYDRA didn't care about where the solider before came from, they just cared about the experimenting that went into creating the one that existed now. There were so many plot holes in his past, but every detail was included in his creation records.
Captured by HYDRA in 1943, where he was experimented with Zola's Super Solider serum... Taken by American forces, later captured once more in a near death state... Steel arm prosthetic created to replace his left... The first cerebrum lobe, frontal and optical, to be mapped for future reference... The first full successful mind control conditioning to be performed on a human... The greatest killer of all time...
The file went on, Maksim knew it by heart, he just skimmed it as a reminder of all HYDRA has done.
Doctor Maksim looked up from the file to the man in the icy chamber, unknowing of all going on around him. The doctor took a breath, frowning at the solider.
"You're a long way from home, Sargent Barnes." He whispered.
Five thousand three hundred and ninety-seven miles from home to be exact.
---
After a long, restless nap on the jet, you awoke for the mission briefing. Groggy, nervous out of your mind, and slightly nauseous from the turbulence, you sat across from Director Fury who clutched a file in his hand and whispered something to another agent who stood beside him.
Still with no idea of what the mission might be, your foot bounced up and down with nerves, your fingers found a loose string on your pants to distract yourself with. you had flown a long way, you knew that, but where?
At last, Fury spoke as the other agent walked away to continue with preparations. "I understand everything has been secretive with this mission, but I assure you it's all part of the plan." He held out the file, the mission file, at last. "I think it's better if I just let you read it."
You took the file with cautious hands, as if it might erupt into flames if handled incorrectly. With shaking fingers, you pried it open and read your fate.
It was written officially, there was a proper procedure to each SHIELD file, your brain could only process the main points at the moment.
Monitor the HYDRA base in remote Russia... insert a corrupted drive into their data base...
"HYDRA!" You yelped, dropping the file into your lap. A couple of agents rushing to get things ready glanced over because of your loud interruption. "HYDRA is still alive?" You asked, incredulously.
In training you were told hydra was dead, that they had been defeated, that they weren't coming back. That's what the world thought, and after nearly a decade without a whisper of them, They should have been.
As if reading your mind, Fury spoke with a grimace. "We had to tell everyone they were gone, and they were for a while. We couldn't have the mass panic of letting the entire world know that the most evil organization in existence was still running, even thought their brief hiatus."
He was right, the world would have gone to chaos if all had found out, Fury seemed to always be right. You took a deep breath, letting the information sink in a moment, one of your hands pressed to your forehead.
"So, you want me, an agent of only three years, to spy on and take down the world's most diabolical organization with a single computer drive?" You passed a moment, your hands falling back to your lap. "All by myself." Your voice dropped to a whisper.
Fury nodded, a small smile on his face. "You don't give yourself enough credit, Agent Carr." He dug into the pocket of his jacket a moment, until his finger appeared again with a small object held between them. "You'll be needing this." He handed it over as well.
You clutched the metallic drive. It was about the length of your pinky finger and cold to the touch. You could tell just by looking at it it was a newer model. Inside of it was a virus of immense strength, capable of taking HYDRA down from the inside and importing all of their secrets to SHIELD data basses.
You really were only chosen because you knew how to work computer systems, you thought, holding the USB tightly.
"So." You began again, looking up to your director. "What I'm hearing is, you want me to take down all of HYDRA, alone, with only this thumb drive?" You held it up with a shrug, feigning nonchalant-ness.
Fury held a small smile, he knew you were joking to make light of the situation. "Yes, that is exactly what I'm saying."
You nodded, crossing your arms. "Piece of cake."
The jet touched down at last, a few miles from your assigned location. SHIELD had to make sure HYDRA wouldn't see them approaching, and so they were going to let you travel the rest of the way by a military utility vehicle.
You and Fury climbed out of the now stable jet, the vehicle that would be your base for a while was filled and ready for what every you might need.
You had so many more questions, but so little time. The file you had tucked away in your bag would answer them all for you anyway, but it still didn't quell your nerves. You twisted your necklace pendant between your fingers, clutched the drive in your other hand tightly, shivering only slightly in the harsh cold.
You and Fury stood in the snow, the sky was gloomy like it was about to dump even more ice, the sun that greeted you at the hangar was long gone. The forest surrounding the clearing was silent, eerie even, holding only monsters and secrets.
Fury was talking, you should have payed attention, but you could hardly keep your eyes off the shifting shadows in the forest. It was all too much too fast, you weren't ready for something as important as this.
"It's time for us to depart now." Said Fury, checking watch. "All you need to know is in the file."
He turned towards the jet, all had been loaded up once more except you and your things. It was time for you to adventure out on your own, prove yourself, prove you really were a capable agent.
Just because you were ready to go didn't mean you weren't absolutely terrified.
Fury turned back to face you once more suddenly. "You're on your own now kid, don't disappoint me." His dark eyes held an unfamiliar look of hope and pride.
Then he boarded, you stepped to stand beside the vehicle and watched as the jet, and any guarantee of survival--was gone.
You took a deep breath, watching the empty, miserable sky. It made you miss the sun, and the stars, and the infinite blue. Tucking the drive you held into a pocket in your pants, and your necklace into the collar of your warm jacket. You took another look around the now empty and dead silent clearing. With one last breath of fresh air, you climbed into the vehicle that awaited you.
You were a long way from home, and you already missed it dearly.