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V A U G H N
My senses are somehow heightened with the long moments of unconsciousness. When the feeling of being alive starts to come back, the first thing I hear is the sound of soft breathing near my head and the feel of fingers curling around my palm — fingers that are warm and smooth. Everything else is quiet.
I try to force my eyes open but it takes a lot of effort. For a second, I start to think that I will never be able to open them again but that feeling washes off when I am greeted with the sight of a plain ceiling above my head. There is an oxygen mask above my nose and it troubles me when I attempt to look around through it. I check for my arms and find both of them safe at my sides. Then I see her.
She is sleeping quietly, her head lying above my hand. Her hair covers her face, hiding it from view. The sight of her gives me the remaining courage I need.
"Cla..." I open my mouth to speak but my tongue is dry and my chest hurts a little when I move. I look down and find my body dressed in a hospital robe, machines attached to my chest. "Claire..."
She jerks her head up as if knocked back into life and when her sight falls on me, she lets out a gasp, her hands moving to her mouth.
"Vaughn!" Claire exclaims. "Oh my God!"
Relief washes over her worried face and I see tears in her eyes, escaping and moving down her cheeks. She rubs them and quickly presses the intercom by my bedside. The red light beeps for a while before disappearing.
"Claire...am I..."
"Shh...just keep quiet..." She runs her fingers through my hair while her other hand presses over my arm.
The door to the room opens and a bespectacled doctor, followed by a nurse, walks in. I keep my eyes on Claire as they check over the readings in the machines attached to me and then the nurse tugs the oxygen mask down my face. I shut my eyes at the action and start to breathe hard. The nurse observes and then pushes it back in place again.
"Will have to keep that one for a while," the doctor says while pressing the stethoscope over my chest. The nurse jots down the doctor's instructions on a tablet. "You feeling okay, Mr. Jackson?"
I move my head, nodding slowly and the doctor smiles. "It's all good then. Just stay in for a week or two and you'll be free to go home."
He straightens, adjusting his stethoscope around his neck, and takes the tablet from the nurse, pressing something over it. When done, he looks at Claire and gives a slight nod.
"Thank you," Claire murmurs to him.
Unable to move my hand, I curl my fingers around Claire's, squeezing hard and making her look down at me. She leans in, her cheeks glossy and her lips carrying a tiny smile.
"Am I...okay?" I ask her, my voice muffled due to the oxygen mask.
"Yes, love...you're okay," Claire almost chuckles with happiness as she presses her lips to my forehead, gently kissing me. "Everything's okay."
Something sharp pierces my arm. Before my eyes close again, I manage a smile in response to her, sighing heavily as the world darkens again.
I am okay.
***
It takes me a week to get my body to start moving properly and breathing without the mask. The nurses shove medicine after medicine down my throat to provide for the food I am unable to swallow. The machines attached to my body lessen in number day by day until I am shifted to another private room which feels more comfortable than the other one I was in. It even has a television in it.
Claire stays by my side all the time while Mom and Rose come to visit me a few times after I let them know that they need to keep an eye on business while I am still stuck inside these white walls. Even little Chris comes to visit me once, followed by his mother who is staying with her son and his grandparents at the Hill manor.
Michael Hill doesn't visit me personally but Isabelle does and she cries, apologizing for slapping me in front of everyone. Although I am told not to talk much, I cannot help but tell her that I was never upset with her for the slap.
I did deserve it, even if a little.
Two weeks later, the doctor finally signs my discharge sheet, permitting me to go home tomorrow.
"I can't wait to take you home," Claire murmurs against my chest as she lies with me in the hospital bed, balled at my side like a tiny thing and taking as much less space as possible.
One of her hands is under her head and the other lies on my thigh. She is trying her best to avoid touching me more than necessary, keeping very still so that she doesn't brush over my stitches.
"Really?" I smirk. "I thought you were happy to be rid of me."
Claire's hand on my thigh tenses as she tilts her head to look at my face. Her eyebrows narrow to form a frown. "Don't you dare say stuff like that, Jackson. If you die on me, I'll kill you."
I chuckle softly, using my index finger to roll a strand of her hair. "Careful, nemesis...I might start to think you still love me."
Without bothering about my wounds, Claire yanks herself up and squeezes my thigh hard, the warmth of her hand rushing through my body and making me itch to touch her the same way. I see her jaw clench and she leans in, our mouths close to each other.
"Of course I love you, Vaughn Jackson. I'll never stop," she whispers, tracing a finger on my chin. My eyes travel to her lips and I rub my bottom lip, the need to kiss her becoming stronger. "If you die on me, I'll follow you because I can't imagine living a life without my Vaughn in it. So, do me a favor and never fight for me again...understood?"
Her warm voice washes over me like the first wind of a summer morning. It makes my heart beat quicker, my brain go fuzzy and I even feel my stomach squeeze, like a thousand butterflies are dancing inside. I lift a hand and touch it to her cheek, my thumb grazing her cheekbone and she closes her eyes, sucking in a breath.
"I love you too, Claire Jackson, and I'm sorry I didn't say it before," I confess. "You're the most passionate, kind, and beautiful woman I have ever met. You make me feel all the good things. When I close my eyes, I see a life with you and I want you to know that — know that I never wished to hurt you. I just had to. Please forgive me, will you?"
Claire bites her lip, her eyes glistening as she curls her fingers around my hand and brings it to her lips, kissing my palm softly. She lies back down with my arm around her and nuzzles her face against my side, her fingers squeezing my T-shirt in a fist.
"Please don't scare me like that again, Vaughn. I won't be able to take it."
I nod, turning a little to my side so that I am facing her in the little bed. Our bodies are so close, almost touching, but Claire is being careful. A little too careful for my taste.
"Truth or dare?" I ask.
Her eyes widen at my question. Slowly, she curves her lips to a smile.
"Always dare, Jackson."
I move closer, pressing a kiss on the crown of her head. "Kiss me, Claire Jackson," I murmur against her hair. "Kiss me like it's forever."
She does. Her palms cup my face as she brings our mouths closer and soon, I feel the familiar heat of her lips against mine as she kisses me.
It's just a soft caress at first but soft is not what I want. I grab the back of her hips and bring her closer, forcing her to part her mouth as I move my tongue in, letting it trail and twist around hers. She tastes of sugar and spice and everything nice. I can't say how badly I missed kissing her.
I missed everything about her — the way she clutches my T-shirt tightly in fists as our bodies heat up, the way she lets out soft moans when I touch my tongue to the roof of her mouth, the way she gasps when I bite her bottom lip. I can never have enough of her.
She is my blood and bone. She is my sanity. She is my universe.
My chest tightens, my lungs hurt, yet, I can't seem to let go of her. But she does. She quickly presses a hand on my shoulder and gently parts us, breathing hard.
"Careless Jackson," Claire mutters when she sees me heaving, the pain in my chest slowly lessening.
"Only for you, baby," I chuckle awkwardly, positioning myself on my back to look at the ceiling while Claire hides her face in the crook of my neck. "So, tell me...what's going on with the others these days?"
"Rose got herself a blind date this Saturday, Chris is being spoiled by my parents and Doris but Willows is keeping an eye out for all three of them..." Hearing Claire speak so casually about Thea lightens a weight in my chest and I can't stop the smile that forms on my face. "Oh...and Doris went crazy with happiness when I shared a news with her last night."
"That's weird...Mom hardly gets surprised. What did you tell her?"
"Nothing much..." she says. "Just that she's going to be a Grandma in a few months."
I laugh. "Oh yeah...stuff like that—" I halt, my brain freezing and rewinding her words. Grandma? I look down at Claire, my heart skipping beats, and find her with a curious smirk on her lips. "Claire...you're..."
She nods and that does it. My heart soars high, the wheels in my head starting to run again while I just stare at her, completely dazed.
"Congratulations, Mr. Jackson," Claire hums, tilting her head to press a full-mouthed kiss on me. "You're going to be a father."
I gulp, unable to express all the emotions I feel. I am ecstatic, pure joy races through my veins. I want to laugh and cry at the same time.
God...I'm going to be a father. I'll have a child. Of my own.
"Claire..." I lean down and kiss her, swift and hard, my arm curving behind her shoulder blades as I pull her close, not able to get enough. "Thank you, Claire. Thank you so much."
Claire moves her fingers to my hair, her nails grazing my scalp as she kisses me back, softly. "You're welcome, Vaughn."
She pulls away from my mouth but hugs me softly, laying her head on my shoulder and I hug her back, praying that we stay like this forever.
We are going to have a baby. I will have a family of my own.
I bury my nose in Claire's hair, kissing her temple, promising myself that I will never let anything happen to her or my family anymore.
This time, I will live for my family and even if I have to lie, it will be for their sake. Just for them and no one else.
I will live for myself and Claire.