Rick freaking Sanchez, the man who makes even the word miracle useless. He had done it this time. But can you blame him? They are the ones who pushed his buttons. I guess they didn't expect him to push right back a thousand folds.
With the Intergalactic Federation gone, and the Citadel of Ricks powerless, Rick had basically killed two birds with one stone, well, three if you can count Jerry as a stone. Rick finally managed to make her daughter so desperate for his presence that she finally broke up with her own husband.
With that, Rick finally took charge over the family, and with Beth about to spiral down the path of depression over the family's torn state, Rick has now replaced himself as the de facto patriarch of the household, meaning no limits, no house laws, and most importantly, he could finally have Morty for any and all future adventures, no matter how dangerous.
So after scaring his grandson away by yelling the season 3 premier in his ear for god knows wtf reason, Rick finally had time for himself.
"Okay Garage, let's wrap this up, take Jerry off the family whitelist"
"Won't that make him subject to the strike zone of the home security defence system?"
Rick froze and began to stroke his chin.
"Wow, I totally didn't think about that..."
He noted.
"In that case, increase damage to certain death"
"You rotten devil"
The garage quoted.
"You're not the first to call me that and you won't be the last, at this point, it's basically a compliment"
Rick retorted as the computer shut down. He pulled his sit from his desk and sat down in front of his desk.
"Man am I awesome"
Rick complimented himself while yawning.
"You know what? Yeah, I am awesome, I'm a freaking beast. I can do what I want, whenever I want. The universe is my toilet, and shit in it I will. If gods exist, I'll be the God of god's. I mean just look at it, in a few months, people are gonna be yelling for an old dipping sauce because of me.
I'm gonna make the entire crowd worship pickles, and by that I mean me.
Sure in canonical time that shit's already happened, but who cares, I'm freaking Rick baby!!! I don't want nobody, I don't need nobo..."
Rick suddenly froze in the middle of his soliloquy.
*Diane*
He uttered mentally, his head lowered down as he chuckled slightly, a teardrop visible in his eye.
"Huh, big man, big gadgets, big piece of shit!"
Rick condemned himself.
*To hell with this f#cking world*
He contemplated.
"Garage, watch the shed, I'm gonna go for a drink"
"How long will you be gone?"
"24 hours, make it longer just in case"
Rick ordered, leaving his garage.
"Rick"
The garage called him back.
"What do you want?"
"Don't overdo it"
Rick paused his movements for a few minutes
"You know, I gave you my wife's voice for a reason, but I think we both know that's not gonna happen. Goodbye."
"Good luck Rick, take care"
With that, Rick got inside his flying vehicle and took off into the infinite void of space.
16 Hours
This is Rick Sanchez. After hours and hours of Rick 'celebrating his victory' across the multiverse, it was clear that Rick wasn't done. He went throughout multiple planets getting high, drunk, laid and outlawed, although the last one was already to note. Right now, Rick had already smoked 2000 different kinds of drugs, drank 200 different space whiskeys and 350 different space vodkas, and slept with over 700 different women, mainly outlaws, alien royals, and one in particular, a talking planet. However Rick still couldn't scratch that uneasy feeling from earlier.
Planet 25,806976^2
Rick made it to the proclaimed 'Heaven's gate of drugs'. A small sandwich shop called 'No lettuce'.
He dashed through the giant frog cashiers and an alien man in a suit eating a sandwich. He passed through the back door, and was immediately met by a mosquito man known as Vermigurber, who was being guarded by two giant frogs, each sitting on either side of him.
"Hey, are you Vermigurber"
"Oh yeah? And who's asking?"
"Someone who wants to get fucked up, I heard you have the best stash in the universe, one in particular that'll leave you less likely to survive if you're dumb enough to take it"
"Oh yeah? and what makes you think you can handle it, Rick Sanchez"
"If you think knowing my name is going to shock me, then you're off track, I'm the smartest man in the universe, and I'm pretty sure the author wrote my name in bold just to make feel good about yourself"
Rick retorted.
"Okay then Rick"
Vermigurber said, as he motioned to one of his men, who brought a small pink packet.
"M-anthrax, the strongest drug in the galaxy"
Vermigurber said.
"What does it do, does it drive you insane? Make your tongue pink?"
"Oh no, worse, far much worse."
"How worse?"
Rick asked.
"You'll know after you somehow manage to survive it, tough guy"
Vermigurber and the rest of the staff chuckled. Rick took some time to think about it, is erasing a little bit of depression really worth this? Oh who am I kidding, of course it was.
"Very well then, how much does it cost?"
Rick asked
"For you Rick, free of charge"
"Last time I checked, wanted men don't give things free of charge unless there's something stuck up their ass, what's the catch?"
"Just a matter of interest, also to speed up the plot a little, I think readers have waited long enough for the crossover part to happen"
With that, Rick Sanchez took the packet and put it in his lab coat inner pocket.
"Thanks, now if you excuse me, I'm gonna go buy some of your lame sandwiches, I'm starving like hell"
Rick came out of the room and sat right in front of the counter. The waiter came to him with a sandwich. Just as he was biting on it, a man came by and sat next to him.
"I see you're also not from around here, my name is Tony"
"I'm Rick and I could say the same about you, you're (burp) one season early"
He said, shaking the man's hand.
A convenient amount of time for it to be night passed and Rick was finally alone in the middle of space, right after dropping Tony at his home planet.
However, Rick's memory off Diane's death didn't pass. This frustrated Rick a lot to a point where he started to overdose himself in the car, to a point where it finally worked, as his mind was totally blank.
Rick, drunk, then took out his portal gun.
"Hmm, you're stressed too aren't ya little guy, well don't you worry, papa Rick's got you covered"
He said, caressing the gun in his chin.
He then took out the M-anthrax packet, and poured it into the charge of the portal gun. This caused pink lightning to surge around the portal charge, as the charge slowly became brown. Rick fired the portal gun, creating a portal big enough to fly him and his vehicle.
While the portal was green as usual for universes within the central finite curve, there was lightning around it, a bad sign, but one that Rick took for granted as he went through, not knowing the universes he was about to wind up in.
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Wester/Westrr/An...
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Animeverse: DxD
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To be continued
Up next
A Rickdundant Character