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You sighed as you walked to school with a terrible mood and an apprehensive feeling in your body, staring at your phone. Gin had texted you the night before, reminding you of the bet once again, giving you no chance to let yourself forget about it just a little, just for a few hours.
''I tried to stop him too! I'm sorry this is happening to you... you deserve someone better :)''
The way Gin tried to make himself look so good in this situation made you cringe, it is a situation that has nothing to do with him in the first place and it made you feel awkward how he suddenly tried so hard to be there for you despite barely saying a word to you at school these months. You two weren't even friends before all this, and you didn't want to become friends for a reason like this. You inhaled deeply as your feet already started to ache. You had taken a different route to school this time to avoid Kuroo. You were afraid you'd run into him on the way, and you weren't looking forward to having to pretend you didn't know about a thing.
What were you supposed to do now? You didn't know anymore, your feelings were all over the place. You wanted to break up with him, let him go and let yourself move on from him, but something inside of you told you to stay. It was your feelings for him, the feelings that had gotten too strong for you to simply let go of him, but sometimes, letting go will give you space and air to breathe, sometimes it'll do you better than holding on to something you feel like is right.
But you loved him, so much. What were you supposed to do about that?
A groan escaped your lips, kicking a loose pebble away from the ground as you started to feel like your head was going to explode and your heart was going to fall apart. What were you even going to say to him? What were you supposed to say to him? ''Hi Kuroo, I think we should break up''? or did you have to confront him? ''Hey Kuroo, I know about the bet.''
''Why does something like this have to happen to me, out of all people. Why did they have to include me in such a stupid bet? I wasn't even around at that school for a long time and they were already picking on me,'' you whispered to yourself as you played with the straps of your backpack. It had affected your opinion of Kuroo; you had no idea he was rude like that because he had never shown you, and you wished he had never shown you this.
You had believed he was one of those lovely 'popular' guys, the ones who are popular yet kind and humble, but now Kuroo seemed to be the total opposite. Was the friendly side of him just an act or is it what he's really like? Or is this mean side what he's really like... which one is the real Kuroo? You didn't know anymore, there were too many lies for you to be able to see what is the truth and what isn't.
Inhaling deeply, anxiety racing through your body, you walked through the gates of the school, finding the ground more interesting to look at than the people around you, which was lucky for Kuroo, who quickly put his hand on your shoulder, making you turn around to face him. ''Wha-'' you squeaked, ''Oh, Kuroo,'' you laughed nervously, avoiding eye contact. You tried to keep it together, the anger inside of you welled up but you had to stay calm. This wasn't the time to do this, not with so many people around. You wanted to wait until the two of you were alone together. You didn't want to cause a scene, this didn't concern anyone, but you and Kuroo. This was between the two of you.
''I'm sorry,'' he clenched his jaw, putting his other hand on your shoulder, bending over slightly and keeping his eyes tightly shut, ''I'm so sorry for tricking you like this. I should have known from the start it was going to end like this. I'm so stupid.''
''What are you talking about?'' you said with a bemused little sigh.
As Kuroo opened his eyes and stared into yours, you cocked your head slightly to the side and felt heat rise up your cheeks, his beautiful yellow eyes piercing yours, it made you go crazy. You loved him too much and the last thing you wanted to do was break up with him, but you kept feeling like it was the best thing to do, considering the whole situation. However, maybe he was going to break up with you now and that's what he wanted to talk about so desperately.
Maybe it was better if he broke up with you.
You didn't want to lose him, but you started to feel like you never really had him in the first place. Even if you desperately wanted to keep him in your life, it wasn't that easy in this situation. Any other situation would have been much simpler, but you had no way of knowing if anything he said to you was true. The things he would say right now could all be lies, and you simply couldn't find out that easily. You shook your head and broke eye contact, his gaze on you making you feel nervous and you wished you had just called in sick today.
''Skip your first class with me, we need to talk, Y/N.''
''N-No, I can't.''
''Please.''
''I have a test... I can't and I don't want to. Please if you'll excuse me,'' you wiggled yourself loose from Kuroo's grip before trying to walk away from him, your chest and heart heavy, tears prickling into your eyes. You didn't even have a test but did horribly with confrontation. You hated it and you wanted to avoid it at all cost. You just needed a little more time to figure out how to break up with him, that's all you needed, some time to think all of this through.
''Please, Y/N, just this one time. I want to be honest about everything, there are some things I need to tell you... I can't wait anymore. I'll even help you study for your make-up test.''
''You should have thought about that before all of this happened, Kuroo. You could've been honest to me from the start and nothing bad would have happened. I even gave you a chance to be honest when we were studying together. You let it slip, and now I'm not sure if you're going to tell the truth or deceive me with another lie.''
''I know, but please let me explain things. Let me be honest and then you may decide whether or not you want to believe me,'' he begged and you could see the desperation in his eyes. You bit your bottom lip and exhaled loudly, ''fine, but this is your last chance to explain things to me, although I don't understand why you didn't just do this when I gave you the chance before. A-And I won't promise I will believe a word you say. You've been lying to me too much. It's difficult for me to trust you, Kuroo.''
He nodded and started walking out of the school gates with you following him behind, you didn't want to walk next to him and it made his heartache. ''I feel like he might break up with me. Or maybe he's going to explain everything to me now... but why is he so late with all of this? I gave him a chance,'' you said to yourself. You two simply walked away from school and stood in a street still just far enough from the busyness, not wanting anyone to eavesdrop on the conversation. Since it was still early in the morning, people were either still asleep or they were at their jobs/school, there were no people outside at this hour.
Keeping your arms crossed in front of you while slouching on the left side of your body, you sighed, ''well, go ahead. Tell me everything Kuroo... and not another lie, please, or else I'm leaving.''
''I messed up, horribly. I'm an idiot for playing you like this. When you first came to school I didn't think you were going to be the girl I'd fall in love with. I didn't think anything of you. I was with Gin and he wanted to make a bet and-''
''Wow, wow, wow, stop,'' You shook your hand in front of your body, signalling him to stop as you closed your eyes before reopening them, ''you're lying to me again, Kuroo! That's it, I'm leaving.''
''What?''
''Gin isn't the one who made this bet, he told me that himself.''
''He told you that? Did he really tell you about the bet... all of it? Did he tell you the actual story or the one he made up to make himself look better?'' Kuroo frowned, narrowing his eyes as he dug in the pockets of his uniform pants, getting his phone out of it. He quickly unlocked it and opened the messages between him and Gin. He scrolled through them and put the screen of his phone in front of your face without saying another word.
Your eyes flickered over his screen, they widened as you read the texts the two boys had exchanged. You couldn't believe it. Gin said things like; ''this is so fun. I know I'm going to win.'' ''lol, she's so dumb.'' ''How's the bet going, friend? Can't believe she fell for it lmao.''
''Oh,'' was the only thing you could get out of your chest. Kuroo nodded and put his phone back into his pocket, you groaned, you felt like you could cry. ''I... He told me someone else made the bet with you... he told me he even tried to stop you.''
''No, he kept encouraging me to do it and when I said I wanted to quit he wasn't having it. He told me I should've thought about the consequences when we were making the bet, and I agree. I did tell him not to tell you because I didn't want to hurt you-''
You interrupted him again, ''you already did, though. And why would you even want to stop the bet? You were close to winning, right? All you had to do was break up with me and you would've won.''
''I didn't want to.''
''Why not? You didn't want to win? You agreed to this bet, Kuroo.''
''Because I have feelings for you.''
You kept your mouth shut and looked away, your heart started to hurt even more. You couldn't believe him. You couldn't believe he had feelings for you, but perhaps this was also part of the bet. One last heartbreak before he would win. You stayed silent and Kuroo bit his bottom lip, ''I agreed to the bet because I didn't expect myself to catch feelings for you. I usually don't catch feelings so I expected this to be nothing different. I'm sorry I agreed to such an awful, messed up bet. I shouldn't have done it. Even if I didn't catch feelings in the end, you or any other girl would've gotten hurt, and that's messed up. I only realise that now, and I'm sorry.''
''Yeah, it is fucked up. I'm glad you realise that.''
''I do and I regret it so bad. Y/N, please let me show you just how much I feel for you. Let me do it right this time. Don't-'' he inhaled deeply, ''don't break up with me just yet. I will make it up to you, I promise.''
''I don't know, Kuroo.''
''Please,'' he grabbed your hands, but you yanked yourself out of his grip.
''I don't believe you'll be able to make things right. You've hurt me and broke my trust... I don't even know if I should believe you right now. You should've thought about the consequences from the start. I can't believe you'd want to hurt someone like this, Kuroo. Are you really this shallow and mean?''
''I should have thought about it. You're right. Gin would just tell everyone I wouldn't do it and he just pisses me off-''
''What from all of this was even real?''
''All of the good things. I meant everything I said to you. You're so beautiful, so kind and I want to be with you. You make me happy. I'm in love with you, really.''
You weren't sure how you felt or what you were thinking. You had feelings for him, sure, but was he worth it? You weren't quite sure about that. Besides that, you weren't sure if he was speaking the truth right now.
''I love you,'' he blurted out. The first time he said it was when you were asleep and couldn't hear him. Those three words had so much significance for him that he thought they shouldn't be spoken to just anybody. He truly loves you so much, and he's afraid he'll lose you if he doesn't tell you right now. The only thing he could do right now was listen to Kenma, and the only thing he could say to you was "I love you" before it was too late, but maybe it already was. Perhaps he couldn't change this situation anymore, maybe too much pain had already been caused. He most likely already ruined all of the trust you had in him.
''No. You don't,'' you clenched your jaw, your heart aching in your chest as you took a step back, ''if you loved me you wouldn't have done this to me.''