Naruto
Four months have passed, and my feelings for Sasuke haven't faltered. Not one bit. I know now more than ever that I truly do have feelings for that boy sent from Heaven.
I wish I could distance myself a little longer. I wish I could bring myself to finally text him, unfortunately I have to be stubborn. I've known Sasuke for a year now. I hope his feelings for me haven't faded.
Every night before I fall asleep he manages to sneak into my thoughts and I stay up another hour or so thinking about him. His eyes, his hair, his smile.
The burning in the back of my head is more evident now. Every time I feel it I'm tempted to turn around and stare at him back. But I know if I look at him directly I'll regret it. No I won't. How have I lasted four months without talking to him? I've never texted him back in this period of four months he's tried. But I read his goodnight and good morning messages. I read all the poems he writes to me, I read about how his day was when he tells me through text. I don't even know how he got my number. But he did, and I'm happy he did.
Walking in the cold is absolutely dreadful. My fingers and nose bright red after trudging through the blistering wind. I miss him. Him. Not just the warmth of his car, not just his snarky remarks, all of him.
And when I watched him walk into school, I did something I never thought I would ever have the nerve to do.
Sasuke
The anxiety pools in my stomach each morning as I get ready, thoughts of Naruto filling my mind. Has he moved on? What a stupid question. He reads my messages all the time. He's acknowledging my presence, at the very least. I see him glance at me from time to time. It's only a matter of days before he starts talking to me again. Although, I have been repeating that for the past four months now. Why am I so desperate for that boy? I could have anyone I want.
Sakura-San's a beautiful girl and, maybe in another time, another place, I would have fallen for her. But I exist in Naruto's world. I exist in his universe. I'm all his, and he's mine. He knows he's mine. I'm ready for him the moment he's ready for me.
I could pick him up, I could drive him to school again. How awkward that would be. I've found myself pulling into Shikamaru's neighborhood each morning to pick him up. Each morning he snaps a picture and sends it to Kiba.
Shikamaru makes me laugh. He's funny, I enjoy his company. He's easy to talk to, and in these past four months, I really do think I could consider him my best friend.
Now of course he's tried to get Naruto to talk to me every so often, but he never responded to the hello I sent those weeks back. Or any of the other messages. He just leaves me on read. The first time this occured, It made me feel awful, and just made me want him even more. I want Naruto's attention, I want to give him attention. I want to drive him to school in the morning so he doesn't have to walk through that horrible February cold. I see him walking by himself in the mornings, shivering his ass off when he could be with me instead.
"Whatcha' thinking about?"
"..What?"
"What. Are. You. Thinking. About? Man, sometimes I wish I could read your mind, you're a weird dude, y'know." Shikamaru told me.
"I think you know very well who I'm thinking about." I replied. He sighed after laughing to himself.
"Honestly, I think you should let it go, bro. It's already been like.. forever. You know, that Ino chics pretty into you." I held back a gag as I thought about the platinum blonde who would always not so subtly try to get my attention with her breasts. Gross.
"It's been four months, Shika." Yes. Shika. We were on that level now. It made me happy knowing I had a friend as close as him I could confide in. It made me feel safe, almost as safe as Itachi made me feel. But when your best friend is your brother, it does bring down your confidence in the slightest.
"Aw come on.. Saucy.." He snorted. I choked on my air as we pulled into a parking space.
"...Shikamaru. Did you just call me Saucy?" I asked as we closed the car doors, squinting in the morning dark with our school bags slung over our shoulders.
"Uh - yeah? You call me Shika, why can't I call you a nickname? You know, Sasuke, Saucy. Same thing." I laughed and pinched the bridge of my nose in second hand embarrassment.
"Don't ever call me that again, bastard."
"You got it, skank."
We both grinned at each other and started making our way to the school building. Shikamaru's body trembled violently and he blew warm air into his hands.
"Jeez.. you couldn't have parked closer to the school?" He snapped, although I knew he was upset about having to walk, nothing to do with me of course.
"Shikamaru. This is the closest parking spot to school." We both walked in silence before laughing quietly to ourselves.
"Whatever, let's just get this stupid day over with. It's almost Friday, right?"
"It's Monday."
Naruto
I watched Shikamaru and Sasuke walk in together, huffing out cold breaths as they removed their puffy coats. They've been hanging out much more recently, ever since I told Sasuke we shouldn't talk for now. Was that his motive? To make me jealous?
Damn, was it working.
Shikamaru texted me every once in a while, trying to convince me to talk to Sasuke again. It's been a few weeks, I assume he gave up and took Sasuke all for himself. Were they dating? How could Sasuke move on so fast? Wait, no. Temari and Shikamaru are together. What am I thinking?
"Hey, nerd, wanna hang today?" Shikamaru punched me on the shoulder as he passed by my desk, not stopping to hear me decline his offer.
"Sure." He spun around, eyebrows raised as he stared at me with his mouth wide open.
"Seriously?"
"Yes. My house. You'll walk home with me?"
"Uh," He glanced behind us at Sasuke for a millisecond before looking back to me, "why don't we take Sasuke's car?"
"...Not today." I turned my back, the burning on my head so very tempting.
"Hm, we'll hang out sometime later, then."
"Uh-huh." I felt my relationship with Shikamaru crumbling. Our friendship was getting uneasy and hateful. I love Shikamaru like a brother, it pains me to think of him as anything else.
"Morning, everyone." Kakashi Sensei walked in. He was getting later and later every day, "Everyone take out your textbooks and go to page 74, please."
Sensei droned on and on about the properties of English (a language much too hard for me to really comprehend) while the burning on the back of my head interrupted my every thought.
"Alright. Class dismissed." Sensei glanced down at me once before shooting me a smile and a thumbs up. I've been much more focused (so it seems) in his classes. It makes him feel better, I wouldn't tell him anytime soon that I'm trying my hardest not to talk to Sasuke.
Why the fuck am I ignoring him? Why the fuck am I not talking to him? I want him. I need him. I need him more than he needs me. So what the hell am I doing holding a grudge against him, wasting my time?
Sakura-San left. Ino-San left. The girls left. Kiba left. Gaara left. Lee left. The rest of the boys left. Shikamaru stood, glanced over at Sasuke and I once, and was out the door as well.
We were alone. Just the two of us.
"Are you coming with us today, Naruto?" Sasuke broke the silence first.
I stared him up and down, watching his eyes watch mine. My heart was beating faster than I ever thought it could. Slowly but surely, we both stood up and started walking towards each other. My ears were ringing and I doubt I could've heard anyone even if I cared enough to try. All I could focus on was him. His face, his anxious eyes, his dark hair framing his face, his lips.
"Naruto..?"
"Why am I still trying."
"..What..? Trying what?"
"Trying to," I gripped his hands, interlocking our fingers like he did those months ago. "trying to stay away from you."
"Is this game finally over?" His voice turned shaky and he smiled, I felt his hands tighten around mine.
"If you took this as a waiting game, then yes." I tore my hands away from his and pulled him in by the neck, pressing our lips together in the most violent and desperate way possible.
Last year, if someone had told me I'd end up falling in love with Sasuke Uchiha, I never would have believed them. I would have laughed in their face and scoffed at their words. I would have cringed away in disgust. Never, did I ever believe I would fall in love with someone like Sasuke. He used to irk me, his staring, his face, his coal black eyes. But now I find beauty in them. He's gorgeous, underneath his stupid, anti-social persona is someone who makes me feel safe. His warm hands stroking my shoulders makes me feel loved. His heavy breathing through his nose while we kiss makes my heart race. Sasuke is my other half. He makes me feel complete.
•—•—•
It's been about a month since my sudden first kiss. Our sudden first kiss. That afternoon he had driven us to my house as fast as he could. My mother was confused of course, we'd told her we'd become friends again, although we knew that after that, we would definitely be more than just friends. Shikamaru had gone home after waiting for us outside the door, I apologized afterwards, but it was perfect for the two of us. Who would've thought, after these past few months, I'd find myself absolutely entranced with this boy.
Now here he were, my head resting on his lap while he played with my hair. His warm hands made me shiver, though my body was far from cold what with his touch. After all this time (a year and two months) he still made me feel alive with excitement.
"Sasuke."
"Hm?" He couldn't hide the excitement in his voice. After a year, he still felt the new thrill of being in love as well.
"I think.."
"You think?"
"I think.. I think I'm in love with you." He just chuckled silently before reaching down and kissing me on the lips.
"Well, I think I'm in love with you too, Naruto Uzumaki."
I'm happy. I'm happy out of everyone on this planet, my first kiss had been with Sasuke Uchiha. The first kiss I never dreamed of having with someone like him.
My sudden first kiss.
fin