Chapter Ten - A Match Into Water
Jaime's POV
My eyes shot open, darting around the room in panic trying to figure out where I was. I sighed in relief and closed my eyes again, breathing deeply when I realised it was only a dream. I was in hospital I knew that for sure, there was a crash, I'd been asleep. Skye wasn't dead. That was a dream. It was then that I realised, maybe she was dead, maybe she hadn't survived, maybe that's what my dream was telling me? I mentally scalded myself for being so stupid and pessimistic. Of course she was alive. The universe wasn't that cruel so as to let me lose her too, was it?
I heard a click as the door was pushed open until a figure stood over me. I blinked a few times, clearing the unshed tears and sleep.
"How are you doing Hime-Time?"
It was Vic, thank god finally a face to tell me what the hell was going on.
I tried to talk but my voice was hoarse,
"Skye?" I questioned meekly.
Concern flitted across his face briefly before he set his mouth into that smile he faked so well.
"She's fine, you need to focus on recovering before you start worrying about anyone else."
I flashed him the "don't give me that shit' look and tried to pull myself up into a sitting position. It hurt but it was worth it as I could finally see the room I was in and take in my surroundings. He sighed and pulled the chair closer to the edge of my bed. He knew he couldn't hide shit like this from me, I'd find out eventually, one way or another.
"She wasn't breathing when the ambulance got to you. You were both in a pretty bad way but your body shielded her head from most of the damage after the second car hit you which saved her life, but obviously caused you quite a bit of damage. They managed to resuscitate her but she's been in a coma since. They won't know if she has any brain damage or lasting effects until she wakes up. If she wakes up."
My mind was racing with the new information,
"What do you mean, if?"
"Jaime she's broken every rib in her body and suffered substantial head trauma from the first crash. She's chipped her skull which could lead to a fracture if she's not kept stable and she lost a lot of blood from the cuts and wounds to her arms and legs. She also burnt a lot of her shoulder and the side of her body closest to the flames. That's a lot of pain and wounds for someone to withstand. But she's strong, she'll pull through, I'm sure of it."
"I want to see her."
"They won't let you yet. You've got to give yourself a chance to heal. You've been out 3 days straight and that's given you a pretty good head start in recovery. The nurses will check on you tomorrow and if they think you're well enough, I'll take you down in a wheelchair but you won't be able to stay with Skye for long as she's still in ICU."
"How is everyone else?"
"Sammie and Tony are both okay, Sammie has whiplash and some cuts and bruises, same goes for Tony. Nothing too serious but enough to keep them bedridden for the week. They'll be okay by the time you're out."
"Who were the second people to hit us? Who was in the third car? Are they okay?"
Vic hung his head slightly, guilt spreading across his face.
"That was Mike and I. The van slipped on some black ice and we side-slammed into you.
"Shit! Are you both okay?!"
"Yeah, Mike cut his head but it didn't need proper stitches or anything so he's fine. Just a bit pissed that we've got to get repairs on the car. The whole passenger side needs re-doing so we can pull the car shaped dent out the side."
"I'm guessing both Skye and Sammie's cars are complete write-offs then?"
"Skye's car burnt out, there's practically nothing left of it. Sammie's will probably be fixable but it'll take quite a bit of work to get the front of the car back to some reasonable looking state and to fix the internal damage to the engine and whatever."
"So what exactly happened? I want to know everything from when your car hit Skye's until now."
He sighed and paused for a second as if weighing up the options. Whether to tell me, or fob me off with some lie until he deemed I was ready to know. I wanted to know now. I need to know how I got out and who to thank that Skye's not a burnt out corpse in a morgue. Finally, he started talking.
"We all noticed pretty quickly that it was us that had hit Skye's car. The spinning of her car and meant the flames were spreading quicker and had taken over more of the car than before. We made Sammie wait in the people carrier while Tony, Mike and I approached the car which had landed in an overgrown ditch off the side of the road. Skye was pretty much pressed up against the only side window that wasn't smashed with you facing out between her and the flames. It would have been stupidly dangerous to try and smash the window with your faces so close to it so Mike got a rock and smashed the back windscreen instead. The flames were getting ridiculously high so we knew we had to get you out but worried that we'd hurt either of you more than we already had. We tried to wait for the emergency services but we knew it would be too late. I grabbed Skye and pulled her out through the back and carried her across the road, lying her on the floor next to the people carrier while Tony and Mike got you and did the same. Sammie was hysterical when she realised Skye wasn't breathing and somehow between the two of them her and Mike got her heart going again although it was really, really weak. We had to resuscitate her 3 times before the emergency services arrived and it's a good job they did as the car exploded just as we heard them pulling up down the street. Skye was taken by air ambulance as she desperately needed surgery to take the pressure off her heart and correct her ribs as one of them had punctured her lung. They inflated her lungs as soon as the surgery was over and now she's in Intensive Care on a ventilator as she can't yet breathe on her own again."
My eyes filled with tears as I listened to him talk. This was all my fault. If I'd of just let Jess talk to me but not have spent the night or met up with her again everything would have been okay. Skye wouldn't have got upset or driven off and crashed her car. We wouldn't be here. I hated myself more than ever before. More than when Jess left me all those years ago. I would never forgive myself for this. Ever.
I was lost in my thoughts when a nurse came in and examined the machines around my bed and checked the IV drip connected to my arm before pulling Vic to the side and mumbling quietly, what were they talking about? Probably how stupid I am and what a mess I've made of myself and everyone else. I studied them more carefully, she smiled at him before walking back over to me and changing something or other with the drip.
"I'm upping your dose of morphine Mr. Preciado. You need to sleep this off, your head will probably sill feel groggy for a few days though. We'll get you to Skye as soon as we can."
I smiled at her gratefully but didn't say anything. There was nothing I could say. I took in her features, she was a little under the average height for a girl making her shorter than Vic and she had fairly long, black hair. She was a slim build with pretty features and a lipring that glinted in the sunlight that was trickling in through a gap in the blinds. She was very pretty all in all and seemed to be getting on very well with Vic.
I eventually zoned out of reality once again, slipping under into the world of the unkown.
***
"They said he should wake up soon. They lowered the morphine doses and sedatives yesterday as his ribs have started to heal and the concussion will have worn off. He'll be allowed to see Skye tomorrow if he's better so I really fucking hope he's awake in the next hour. I'm going to get coffee, come and get me if he decides to join us again."
I heard the door to my room slam as the female speaker left. I'm guessing it was Sammie. It sounded like Sammie but I don't trust myself to hear things right anymore. Not in this condition anyway.
There was movement beside me and I felt a hand slip into mine. At first I thought It might be one of the guys but there was no way in hell their hands were this soft and feminine, even Vic's. My heart skipped a little when I thought it might be Skye but then I remembered what Sammie had just said, Skye's still not well. I must have furrowed my brow whilst thinking as whoever was next to me started speaking.
"Jaime? Are you awake?" Their voice was raspy and breathless, I recognised that voice but who's was it? I tried to open my eyes, to speak, give them any indication that I could in fact hear them but it was no use. I couldn't move again.
"Jaime, I'm sorry. The guys told me what happened when I arrived. If it wasn't for me, you wouldn't be in here and neither would anyone else. I'm so sorry. I had to come and see you. I hope you don't mind."
Fuck it was Jess, what is she doing here? How did she get here? Why? She's ill, dying. Why is she in London? It was as if she could read my mind as she soon spoke up again after taking what sounded like breaths from an oxygen tank.
"I was sent here for some treatment, they thought It might cure me or at least prolong my life and as I was still strong enough to travel they sent me on the first flight they could book. I arrived a couple of days ago. I bumped into Vic in the hospital while I was doing physio and walking around. He told me everything. I feel terrible. This is all my fault. I was selfish and wanted those last few days with you. I wanted you to love me again before I died and because of that almost killed both you, the guys and your new girlfriend. They said I can go and visit her later, Skye I mean. I read somewhere that people in comas can actually hear what you're saying so I want to talk to her, explain things."
Oh shit if Skye really could hear us what would she think? Would she be mad? Fuck why can't I just open my eyes, my mouth, tell her that it's a bad idea. Stupid fucking meds.
I heard her sigh and stand up, the chair she'd been sat on scraping across the sterile, tiled hospital floor. The door opened and closed. I was alone again. I decided to ignore all my instincts that told me to fight and stay awake, instead slipping back into unconsciousness.
Sammie's POV
I was sick of hospitals. It had been over a week since the crash, Jaime was only just being weaned off the sedatives after 4 days of being completely under and out of it, Skye was still in the coma and had yet to give any signs of improving. Mike and Vic were in the best state out of all of us, only a few scratches and bruises between them. Tony and I had whiplash and some minor cuts to our faces, arms and legs. I'd spent everyday here since we were admitted, only leaving to go home and shower or get clean clothes. I stayed by Skye's bedside for hours on end, talking to her, playing some of her favourite bands and songs to her in the hope of getting some sort of reaction out of her but there was nothing. I was furious when this Jessica girl turned up. She caused this. I didn't want to leave her alone with Jaime while I went to see Skye but Tony said I needed to, that she wouldn't do any harm. Not that she could do any more than she already has I guess. It was when Tony said that Jess wanted to see Skye that I totally lost my shit. I didn't want her anywhere near her. That bitch has ruined their relationships and may well have ruined her life. If Skye has any lasting effects from this crash I will make sure this treatment doesn't work and Jess is sent back to San Diego in a coffin I will not handle my friends getting fucked over.
I took a minute to reassess my thoughts, man I was being harsh. This lack of sleep was really getting to me. I shook my head and continued walking up the corridor to Skye's room in ICU. They were hoping that she'd wake up sometime soon so they could move her into a normal room and off the ventilator but she still couldn't breathe on her own. It broke my heart to see her hooked up to all those machines that determined whether she lived or died. Just as I had done for the past week I sat on the same chair next to her bed and held her cold hands between mine, trying to transfer some warmth into them. I talked to her, told her about Jaime, about what was going on in the news, asking her again and again to hurry up and open her eyes to join us again as her bedroom wasn't going to tidy itself and I needed help with the housework but yet again it didn't work. I'd pretty much given up all hope of these stupid questions and insentives working, all I could do was sit there and be with her. Make sure she was never alone and always knew I was thinking about her. For as long as she was here I would never let her be alone. I even managed to persuade the nurses to put her in a private room and let us stay after visiting hours. I was sat holding her hand while playing a compilation of her favourite songs for her on CD as I always did when there was a knock on the door and Jess stepped into the doorway. I glared at her, my stare ice cold in unwelcoming.
"Tony said I could come and speak to her for a while, is that okay?" her words were uneasy, my gaze threw her off track and she stuttered a little.
I stood up, kissed Skye's hand, and walked towards where she was stood at the door. She stepped aside when I drew nearer, allowing me out into the corridoor.
"I'm going to find Tony and Vic. I'll be back in 10 minutes. If anything happens, even the slightest flicker of the eyes or twitch of her fingers you come and get me straight away. And I mean straight away."
She nodded once, her eyes watering slightly but I couldn't be sure if that was due to my words or her illness or even something different that I didn't know about.
With that I gave her one last glare, looked over at Skye briefly and then stepped out, shutting the door behind me.
Skye's POV
I wasn't sure how long I'd been here. All the days seemed to merge into one. Nothing was working properly and my thoughts were a haze of random ideas and words mixed together. I heard what they were telling me, listened and hung onto every single word as if it was the last thing I'd ever hear. For all I knew it could be. I could feel the dead-weight on my lungs, the stuggles to breathe without the supplies of oxygen being pumped into my lungs. I felt the ache every time my heart sent out a sluggish beat, attempting to bump blood around my weakened body, the stabbing and dull ache that penetrated my brain. Everything hurt when I wasn't sent into a deep sleep from the painkillers regularly being sent coursing through my veins. I found comfort in Sammie's voice, the voice that kept me sane for all those painful years and was doing so once again. Every inch of me yeared for Jaime though, for his voice, his touch, his reassurance. I wanted him to be near me. I didn't care about anything that had happened anymore I just wanted to know he was okay. Fear spiked through my body every time I thought about his injuries, what if he wasn't even alive? Surely they would have told me? I've been visited by not only Sammie but Vic, Mike, Tony and Gemma none of which said anything about what's happened to him. Why won't they tell me how he is? What are they kiding? They must be hiding something. Why would they hide this from me? I'm not so ill that I can't take it. But then again they don't know that I can hear them. They don't know anything other than my injuries. I don't even know what my injuries are. I sighed internally and tried to switch my brain off. I wanted to leave this world for a little while. Drift off into dream land although I knew I would be haunted by the images of the crash. Anything was better than waiting.
Just as I was slipping away I heard Sammie talking to someone and her getting ready to leave. No. Where was she going? I don't want to be alone. I paniced and I felt my sluggish heart pick up in pace, pounding against my painful ribs. There was another female voice in the room. A voice I didn't recognise. Was it a nurse? Surely not as they were talking visiting me for a while. The latch clicked and the room was quiet. I longed to open my eyes and look around, see where I've been for the past however long it was, see who it was that I could hear raspily breathing from the chair Sammie had just vacated. They sighed and I heard them go to say something but hesitate as if they couldn't quite find the words or figure out what they wanted to say. Eventually they started speaking.
"I know I'm probably the last person you want to hear right now. Hell, I'm not sure if you even can hear me." oh believe me, I can. "But I felt like I needed to talk to you. To tell you exactly what went down with Jaime in San Diego and why." Jessica. With every fibre of my failing body I wanted to open my eyes, stand up and scream at her that I don't care, that she's ruined everything, that I hope she rots in hell for taking away the one thing I love more than anything else in the world. "Three years ago I was diagnosed with Lung Fibrosis. As there's currently no cure, for those years I've been undergoing treatment to try and prolong my life for as long as possible, giving me the chance to live and fulfill any last wishes. One of those wishes was to see Jaime again, to fix things. When we were younger we were childhood sweethearts, everyone wanted to be us. We were together for around 6 years and I loved him but I decided to end it, not long before he decided to move to England actually. I wasn't exactly pleasant in the way I went about it though, I was foolish and harsh. I left him waiting in the place we'd always go to meet, the palce I fell in love with him and he asked me if I'd be his girlfriend." Is this really supposed to make me feel better? She was a bitch, broke my boyfriends heart and now she's breaking mine. What is it with this bitch? "When I was diagnosed I knew I needed to fix things with him, I didn't want to die with any unfinished business. I didn't want him to think I was still that person, I wanted him to know how sorry I was. Most of all, I wanted him to find it in his heart to forgive me, not that I deserved it in any way, shape or form. When I found out he was back in San Diego I was ecstaic, I would finally have my chance. I had no idea he had a girlfriend until his parents told me after he'd spent the night at mine. Don't worry though, nothing happened. In my condition anything even close to sex is completely off limits. We ate pizza and fell asleep on the couch, that's all. He was kind to me Skye, he forgave me after everything I did to him. I didn't mean to come between you both." Bit late for that isn't it? "I'm not going to deny that we kissed, because we did." Well at least she's being honest about it, even if she is a whore. "But it was a kiss goodbye, After he left to come back here I never expected to see him again, it was only when I was told that there was some new treatment here in London for me that could prolong my life for another 5 years and then another 5 after that as long as I keep coming for treatment that I realised I might have a chance to say hello, come back into his life as a friend and nothing more." Nothing more? How can you go from the love of each others life to nothing more than friends? "When I bumped into Vic while doing physio and he told me what happened I was devestated. What I did not only almost ruined your relationship" almost? almost ruined? I couldn't get far enough away from him, I crashed my car trying to escape. You put me here, you're the reason we're appart, the reason I'm lying here wanting but not being able to have him and you're telling me you ALMOST ruined our relationship? "but I also almost got you all killed, even if I wasn't directly involved."
I heard her voice break a little and she sniffed. Was she really crying? Really? I'm the one who can't fucking move and who's relationship has fallen apart. I'm the one who has no idea what's going on with my own body, who is plagued by nightmares and fear everytime I'm left alone. Granted, she's ill and the weight of dying hanging over your head would be enough to drive anyone to do what she did but at the same time, what am I supposed to do? I love him so much. I'm insecure and have been fucked over so many times before I don't know how much more I can take. I'm weak but Jaime made me feel invincible and she took that away from me. Now I'm just the weak, troubled young adult I was before but this time with some severe fucked up health issues. Great.
"I want to fix things between you and Jaime, it's the least I could do. He still loves you, you know. With every fibre of his being he loves you. According to Vic the first thing he did when he woke up last week was ask how you were, he was petrified you'd died. He wanted to see you but they won't let him until he's in a better condition. Sammie said that he should be waking up again in the next few hours/day and that providing his cracked ribs have healed better he'll be aloud to come and see you for 2 hours every day."
It came as a shock when I realised that the only person who'd divulged any information to me regarding Jaime's health was Jess. Sammie had told me he was okay but not what had happened, why he wasn't here with me.
"I promise you Skye, that I will do anything I need to so I can make you see that you are the only one Jaime wants, yes I was his past, but you are his future. You're the one he wants to spend forever with, not me."
She wanted us to be together? She wanted us to fix things? Why? Surely she'd want to spend what's left of her life with him? Why would she do this for me?
In that moment I realised that there really was no point being bitter about this, as long as Jaime and I came out of this together it would only make us and our love stronger. With Jess' help I can get him back. I could be with him again. I didn't want to hate her anymore, If she was going to die I wanted her to know that none of it mattered anymore. That I wanted to make peace with her and be there for her while she's here and getting her treatment, to support her if no one else would.
I was going to fight. I was going to fight whatever it was that was keeping me held here, I would surface from whatever the hell this would and I would fix things with Jaime with Jess' help. I want to be with Jaime, grow old with him, have his children, watch him age and grow wrinkles and grey hair. Nothing would tear us apart this time.
I heard the door open again, someone was being brought in. I heard Jess laugh through her tears.
"Jaime, you're here!"
All my senses became hyper-aware, he was here. I needed to see him. I needed to open my eyes. I felt a hand slide into mine. It was warm and masculine. He really was here.
"Baby? Can you hear me? I don't know if you can, but I love you. Please come back to me. I love you. I'm sorry about everything that happened." I felt a tear drop onto my hand as he rested his forehead against my stomach. It felt like heaven to have him touch me again, even if he didn't know I could feel it. "I need you, Skye. You have no idea how much I need you. You're all I've been thinking about, I was having dreams about you, more like nightmares really. I was so scared you wouldn't make it. You're my life. Without you I see no purpose any more. You keep me grounded. Please, baby, please. I need to hear your voice one more time. I need to see the colour of your eyes, the smile that plays on your lips when you're teasing me or badly hiding something, I need to hear your laugh. I can't live in this world if you're not there beside me, to give me advice, make me laugh or tell me when I'm being an absolute knob."
I was trying to hard, I was fighting every instinct that told me to go back to sleep, to listen but to stay as I was, to rest. I wanted him to see my eyes just as much as I wanted to see his, I wanted him to know that I was listening and that I needed him just as much as he needs me.
"Even like this, you're still the most beautiful girl I have ever seen. I want to kiss all your pain and hurt away. I don't want you to feel this anymore. God I just wish you could give me some sign that you can hear me."
I felt him press his lips against the base of my neck, right between by collar bone and shoulder.
"The doctors said there'd be some scaring after the skin grafts from the burns you sustained on the left side of your neck, shoulder and your left side running from your armpit to your hip whilst in the car. I don't know if anyone told you that, but I'm telling you now. I want you to be prepared, nothing will be easy for a while from now on but I'll be here for you, through it all."
His lips trailed kisses along my shoulder, kissing the mottled skin that the surgeons would have put over my charred body.
I fought harder, I needed this. I yelled at myself in my head, yelled at myself to get a grip, all I had to do was move one finger, twitch my foot, my arm, my nose, eyes. Anything that would show him I was here.
He gasped, I'd done it. I'd gripped his hand. Only slightly, but enough to notice. I relaxed again, he knew I was with him.
"Skye?? You can hear me?? Open your eyes if you can hear me, please open your eyes baby, please!"
His hand brushed my dirty and probably disgustingly greasy hair from my face, kissing my forehead repeatedly.
My heart was going at a million miles an hour, my whole body was tensing up, I had to do this for him. I had to.
Everything became a white, blurry fuzz. I'd done it. I'd opened my eyes.
"SKYE! BABY!"
I waited for my vision to focus, I could see Jaime looking down at me, a discarded wheelchair behind him. I took in his face, that beautiful face I'd missed so much. His chocolate eyes wide and glazed with tears, those dimples like cute little craters in his face that lit up when he smiled. He kissed my nose and his tears dropped onto my cheeks. I knew I wouldn't be able to talk, the tube was still in my throat to help me breathe. I was too weak to lift my arms so I just looked at him smiling, trying not to close them again.
I gazed up at him for a little while but everything started going blurry again. No! I'm not ready yet! No! Please let me look at him longer! Please! My heart was slowing, the sluggish beat returning. Machines began to beep around me, Jaime's face was panic stricken.
"NO! SKYE! STAY WITH ME! DON'T YOU DARE LEAVE ME AGAIN WHEN I JUST GOT YOU BACK! DON'T YOU DARE! KEEP YOUR EYES OPEN, LOOK AT ME, STAY. PLEASE STAY!"
I couldn't think straight, as my eyes grew heavy again the only thing I could think of was the lyrics to a song I'd loved when I was growing up. I'd listened to it every night as I drifted to sleep. Why was it the only thing I could think of now? It reminded me of Jaime, that's why.
My heart was slowing, breaths coming shorter even with the oxygen being pumped down my throat. I just couldn't get the song out of my head. Everything went black but I was still singing softly in my head:
I want you forever, forever and always, through the good and the bad and the ugly. We'll grow old together, forever and always....
They talk about the kids they're gonna have and the good life. The house on the hillside, where they would stay. Stay there forever, forever and always through the good and the bad and the ugly. We'll grow old together, and always remember whether for rich or for poor or for better, we'll still love each other, forever and always...
As the tears fall on the floor she looks into his eyes, and she says: "I want you forever, forever and always. Through the good and the bad and the ugly, We'll grow old together, and always remember, whether happy or sad or whatever, we'll still have each other, forever and always....