CHAPTER 19: The Queen of Hawkins
Is it really your anxiety that stops you from giving me everythin'
Or do you just not want to?
— Renegade, Taylor Swift
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
6th June, 1984: The Hawk Theatre
DAPHNE HAD COMPLETED ALL OF HER HOMEWORK for the week during the first half of Rumble Fish and Robin hadn't stopped by once. Daphne knew she was working because she'd seen her talking to their English teacher, Mr Hauser, as she walked in. It was odd — how noticeably she missed Robin's presence. She hadn't even realised how much she enjoyed her company until she no longer had it.
The cheerleader sat through the last hour of the movie in crippling boredom, flicking kernels of popcorn at the obnoxious couple in the second last row. When it was finally over, Daphne hurried over to the exit — only to find Steve blocking it.
"Steve? What are you doing here?" she demanded, placing her hands on her hips. "Have you been following me?"
Steve rolled his eyes. "No, Daphne. I know you've been spending most of your time here and not at home like you said. I came to ask you if I've done something wrong, because every time I see you in school you run the other way."
Daphne sighed, running a hand down her face. "You haven't done anything wrong, Steve. I just haven't been sleeping well recently and I haven't been in the mood for company. I'm sorry."
"Are you still having the nightmares?" asked Steve, concern washing over his face.
Daphne's heart twinged with guilt. She used to sleep over at his house all the time, so she didn't have to be alone in hers — until she started waking him up with her screams. He had been so worried. But she couldn't have him keep looking at her like she was cracked porcelain and so she had stopped staying over altogether and convinced him the nightmares had gone away.
"Sometimes," lied Daphne. I see it every time I close my eyes, she wanted to say. I wish the monster had taken me instead of Fern. I'm falling apart and I don't know how to keep living anymore. "But you don't have to worry about me. I'll get through it."
"Daph, you're my girlfriend," said Steve. "I lo—I care about you. Of course I'm going to worry about you. Have you thought about making an appointment with Miss Kelley?"
"The guidance counsellor?" Daphne scoffed, wrinkling her nose. "I don't want to talk about my feelings and rate my mood on a scale of one to ten, Steve. I just want to forget any of this ever happened."
"That's not healthy, Daph," insisted Steve. "You're bottling up your emotions and it's killing you. You went through something horrible and it's okay to not be completely fine."
"You're not a psychiatrist, Steve," snapped Daphne, suddenly feeling defensive. "Trust me when I tell you you have no idea what I'm feeling right now. What I need is for you to give me some space. Okay?"
Steve's face fell and Daphne instantly wanted to apologise. She knew she was being unreasonable — that Steve was only worrying so much because he cared — but she was suffocating. He was there all the time and she couldn't take it. How was she supposed to hide what she was feeling when he wouldn't leave her alone?
She didn't know how to handle the trauma she'd experienced, he was right. But all she'd ever been taught was how to repress her emotions, not how to deal with them in a healthy way. She didn't know how to do any of this and every second she spent with Steve, she felt like she was letting him down. She knew he loved her and she wished more than anything that she could return those feelings. But something inside of her was broken. He deserved better and she couldn't give that to him.
Steve was still staring at her as if she'd just broken his favourite toy. The air between them was heavy, as though both of them knew that they were nearing the end. When Steve spoke, his voice was resigned. "Do you need a lift home?"
Daphne shook her head, words unable to form in her mouth. She was afraid if she opened it, everything she had been hiding from Steve would just spill out there and then.
"Okay. I'll see you on Friday, then."
Daphne tilted her head, swallowing hard to allow herself to speak. "Friday? What's on Friday?"
Steve looked at her as though she had three heads, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Prom, Daphne. You've been talking about it since freshman year — did you seriously forget?"
"No," lied Daphne, her eyes widening a fraction as she realised she had. "I just thought you meant... the Friday after. Anyway, I'll see you on Friday, Steve."
Steve stood motionless in the exit as Daphne pushed past him, too caught up in her head to pay him much attention. She couldn't believe she had forgotten about prom. Once upon a time, she, Meera and Fern had sat on her bed, picking out dresses from the fall catalogue and dreaming about the boys they would take as their dates. Once upon a time, Daphne would've given her right leg for Steve Harrington to take her to prom. But now it couldn't be lower on her list of priorities.
She emerged from the theatre and into the dusk air, taking a deep gulp of fresh air that her lungs had been struggling to find. She screwed her eyes shut, anchoring herself to the ground. She could not have another panic attack. Not here, not now. Steve would have her institutionalised. She pushed herself into a brisk walk down the street with no destination in mind. She had only been walking for a few minutes when she heard the sound of voices coming from an alleyway ahead.
"Oh my god, you're deluded!"
Daphne stopped in her tracks, suddenly becoming as still as the night air.
"Robin, you have to be careful with him."
Daphne frowned. Robin? Her Robin? Who was she talking to? Daphne strained her ears. That was a male voice. It sounded aggressive and patronising, and Daphne didn't like it.
"No I don't!" replied Robin, her voice hoarse with frustration.
"How do you know?"
Daphne took a few steps closer to be able to hear better. She knew she shouldn't eavesdrop, but this conversation sounded heated. She had to be there in case things escalated and Robin was in trouble. She owed that to her.
"I know. Okay? I know. He's not like that. Whatever you're thinking about—about the way that things are between us, I promise you you're wrong."
Daphne's brow furrowed. Who was she talking about? Robin had never mentioned having a boyfriend...but then again, she and Daphne weren't really friends. They were just classmates who occasionally watched films together. Maybe she just didn't know her that well after all.
"You can't know that for certain, Robin."
"I can actually. Hauser is not Mr Van Hauten, okay? He's—he's different. He's different from all the other teachers."
Daphne's eyes widened. Mr Hauser? She prayed to God that Robin didn't have a crush on that man. Not only was he a teacher, but Robin definitely wasn't his type.
"Different how?"
"I—I don't know! I—I—I can't explain it. He just is."
"In my experience, different isn't usually good."
"Yeah, well your experience sucks. You're scared of everything that is different. And that doesn't make you right or good or better than anyone, Dash, it just makes you a coward," Robin spat.
Daphne flinched, waiting for a retort. She knew Dash Montague. Knew him and hated him. He was the kind of guy who thought he was so hard done by because he was a self-proclaimed 'nerd', but in reality, he was just a creepy narcissist. He and Daphne had been partners in Biology last semester and he had spent the whole time talking down to her as though she had an IQ lower than his shoe size.
After school in the library when they had gone to finish their project, Dash had tried to make a move on her. When she promptly rejected him, he'd given her the whole 'nice guys always finish last' speech and then called her a slut. It had been rather satisfying for Daphne to slap him right across his smug face, and she wouldn't hesitate to do it again if he kept talking to Robin in that way.
"I am not a coward. If you stop being so stubborn all the time and open your eyes, you'd see that," yelled Dash, and his voice was so hostile that Daphne felt she simply had to intervene.
She rounded the corner as casually as she could, interrupting their conversation immediately as both heads swivelled towards her. Daphne squared her shoulders, trying to look braver than she felt at that moment.
"What the hell is going on?" she demanded, then turned her scathing gaze towards Dash. "Why are you yelling at her?"
Dash scoffed. "Why is that any of your business? You might be the Queen of Hawkins High, but that doesn't mean you can dictate what we do in our own free time."
"You're the one making enough noise to raise the dead," Daphne spat. "Call me a concerned citizen."
"Well, nothing's happening," replied Dash. "You can go now, princess."
"Excuse me?" said Daphne, taking a step closer to him. "I don't know where you get off on talking to people like that, but I'm not going anywhere."
"This is a private conversation," snapped Dash.
"Then have it somewhere private."
"Daphne," said Robin softly, placing a hand on the cheerleader's shoulder. Daphne felt her tense shoulders relax slightly. "It's fine. I'm fine."
Daphne turned to face Robin, her eyes narrowed. "He's talking to you like you're a child, Robin." She lowered her voice. "He's not a good guy."
Robin gazed up at her through her eyelashes, not saying anything. Daphne knew this wasn't the time, but for some reason, when she was this close to Robin, all she could think about was how blue her eyes were. They were interrupted by the sound of a horn beeping, causing the three heads to turn towards the road.
"That's my ride," said Robin. "Daphne, do you want a lift?"
"I'm good, thanks," replied Daphne firmly. "You go on. Dash and I are going to have a little catch-up."
Robin hesitated, not wanting to leave Daphne alone with Dash. Daphne wasn't sure if she was worried more for her safety, or Dash's. "Are you sure?"
"It's fine, Robin," said Daphne softly. "I'll see you in school."
Robin nodded and slowly made her way over to the car. Daphne watched her as she left, making sure she got into the car safely. Robin met her eyes through the car window and nodded. Daphne felt her lips curve up into a smile before her gaze hardened and she turned back to Dash.
"What the fuck are you playing at, Montague?" she hissed. "You need to quit acting like you care about Robin because I can see right through your little act."
"Someone's gotta look out for her," retorted Dash. "What, do you think it's going to be you, princess?"
"Better me than you," snapped Daphne. "How exactly do you propose to help her? Like you helped me in the library? You don't do shit for anyone unless it fits your slimy agenda."
"Why do you even care about her so much?" scoffed Dash. "I thought the only thing you cared about was your dumb boyfriend. Or have you gotten sick of him already?"
"My relationship is none of your business," snapped Daphne. "But I know exactly what type of guy you are, Dash. And I would be more worried about what you would do to Robin than Mr Hauser."
"How can you guarantee Mr Hauser won't make a move on her?" asked Dash, his eyes narrowing. "The guy's a creep. And he's hiding something that I think would make you and Robin change your minds about him."
Daphne raised an eyebrow. "And what's that?"
"Didn't you see him tonight?" asked Dash, his face twisting into a cruel smile. "He was seeing Terms of Endearment. But he wasn't alone. He was sitting with another man. Robin and I followed him to this ice cream shop, which he went through to get to someone else's car. Now, why would he do that? Unless... the man he was meeting wasn't just a friend."
Daphne felt her blood heat up. She wasn't stupid. She knew exactly what Dash was implying. And although he thought he was about to shock her with the news, Daphne had a secret of her own. She already knew.
In the space of a second, Daphne had grabbed Dash by his flimsy tie and dragged him down to her eye level. With her knee positioned at his crotch like her father had taught her during the self-defence lessons he forced her to take as a kid, Daphne began to speak in a low tone.
"I don't know what you think you know, but if you start spreading rumours about things that you are too stupid to understand, I will personally see to it that your life is over," hissed Daphne. "You said it yourself. I'm the Queen of Hawkins. And my father? He knows a lot of powerful people. So if you ever want a chance of having a remotely peaceful life, you will keep your pathetic mouth shut."
Daphne had never seen Dash at a loss for words before, so the stuttering, flustered wreck of a boy pinned against the wall in front of her gave her a sick sense of pleasure.
"And," continued Daphne. "You leave Robin alone. Or I will rain hell on you, Dash. And you and I both know that I can do it."
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
author's note !
the last scene is from rebel robin! dash pissed me off SO much that he had to be included in this story as well just to get his comeuppance from daphne.
also, i know steve fans probably hate me right now for how i'm writing his and daphne's relationship, but please try not to blame daphne too much🙏🏻 she's hurting too. (i also am a huge steve fan so this hurts me too).
on a lighter note, is anyone watching this year's love island uk? i've had to stop because it's not enjoyable anymore with how misogynistic the boys are. they were straight up bullying ekin & tasha and i'm not here for it. i hope ekin and danica couple up and win it together.
remember to vote and especially comment! i love hearing from you all <3
love, el xx