There was plenty to Peso on the outside, as there usually was with any creature. Barnacles knew that the outside of a person was just the basic overview of their personality, how they looked and acted and what they said. But when you got to know them, you were digging deeper and seeing what was on the inside. Now, if there was enough on the outside to get the basic idea of a person, then the inside was usually, simply put, a mess.
And that didn't mean it was all awful. What was on the inside made Tweak, Tweak and Kwazii, Kwazii. Take them for example. Kwazii, on the outside, was easy to read and not just because he usually wore his naked emotions on his face. They could immediately tell he was adventurous, kind of reckless, and had been in some certain situations, all by looking at the eyepatch and the smile just underneath his pink nose. On the inside, Kwazii ran wild, his ideas and beliefs, experiences and everything that was stored inside his heart and mind was jumping like Spanish beans, waiting for it's turn to act, to be told, to be brought to light. What would he do today in his spare time, when would they go out next, why didn't they do this---all that was hopping about in Kwazii, making up the cat and getting more wild and crowded everyday until the day it would have to rearrange itself into e new environment just to save some room, maybe changing Kwazii a tad in the slightest during the process.
Tweak, on the outside, as also easy to read, but in a different way. When she looked you square in the eyes, she was talking directly to you, daring you, telling you; go away, you've crossed the line, I will bite you, do you really want me to answer that question?
It was easy to make sense of the negativity on Tweak's face. And through he hard words and even harder exterior, Barnacles knew it was people like that who have the most interesting, most valuable, just the most, stored on the inside. While Tweak was looking at him in disapproval, her eyes sparkling like they always did with emotion she detested (Tweak hated emotion) Barnacles tried to piece together what was going on inside her heart and mind, which, unlike Kwazii, was trapped inside her, making a mess and fighting to get out, making it a tad easier to figure it out; why me, why always me, why doesn't anyone care about anyone other than themselves, why does the world have to be like this, why are people so awful to each other? Why isn't the world easier, why can't they be nice, why do I always have to wonder if someone's lying or not, i can't live like this anymore.
There was a lot to look at when it finally rushed out in a big ugly mess.
It had taken years.
And that was what got Barnacles thinking about peso in the first place.
The look on Peso's face when he saw Tweak not only finally admitting her pain but being accepted through it, being comforted, still being their friend, when they found her on the kitchen floor, frozen in paralyzed fear, her survival instinct fighting her against the knife.
Eyes wide as Tweak confessed, as if he couldn't believe it. Not what she was saying, but what they were saying to her, no scorn, just sadness, as if he couldn't believe they would accept a person even after she had exploded in such a scene.
As if he couldn't' believe they could accept her pain.
So now Barnacles wondered.
On the outside of peso, there was softness, baby fat and baby fluff that refused to leave, a small smile, barely noticeable through layers of shyness. Layers of protection.
There were big baby eyes, the color of new sky despite his mother's green and his father's brown. There were hugs and cuddles just written all over him, as if he were a walking invitation for a hug, the need to be protected radiating off him in waves. On the outside of Peso, there was caramel. Sweet, soft, gooey and irresistibly packaged in cute little squares. On the outside was the world's most innocent child.
But, Barnacles could see the barriers, the walls built under that blanket of softness, keeping Peso inside, inside his books, inside his room, inside his head, inside himself where no one could harm him.
As if fear was literally holding him back.
Unbeknownst to anyone, it was.
And also unbeknownst, what was inside Peso was anything but innocent.
It started when Peso was born.
It's strange how a person is born. They say everyone is born different. For some, this is more noticeable than others. Some are born disabled, some are born silent, some are born late. Others are born looking completely natural, soft skin, fluffy fur and closed eyes on their fat, scrunched face. But inside, no two people are the same.
When Peso finally hatched, the last of his raft, (A word for a bunch of penguins) he was immediately different. More than others. he was small enough to live in his sister's dollhouse, and he usually did, safe and sound where his mother could easily keep an eye on him. Where he slept half the time, and observed the other half.
That also made him different. Peso had his eyes wide open, but his mouth stayed shut. He watched everything that happened around him, absorbing it like he was a sponge and letting the world enter into him, which would later turn out to be a big mistake.
Because the word was big and it was bad.
And when peso was born, the most important thing would happen that defined him.
His mind was created. And a purple light was starting to take shape in the darkness of his brand new mind, devoid of anything other than empty darkness waiting to be filled.
The light faded into a shape, a small person, purple all over.
This was not Joy.
The little person---the little emotion looked around, taking in his body in wonder. Blue and white plaid sweater vest, green corduroy pants, simple black shoes. But he had arms. Hadn't he been just a light?
He took a careful step forward. Something inside him was propelling him forward, but something else inside him was propelling him toward caution.
He didn't know where he was or what he was. But something told him that this new body...this was him. And he was in control.
He was safe.
He quickly got the hang of walking, stumbling slightly but laughing it off, and after figuring out his body, he looked toward a light that had begun to flood the place.
He realized he was somewhere small and dark.
Immediately, thoughts began to clog his mind.
'I could get crushed or run out of air, it's so dark in here, where am I, what if something's hiding in the dark?'
So many times he tried to brush that last one off. So many times he'd failed. As he would learn over the years, it was very sensible to fear the dark.
Fear.
That came to him out of nowhere. But somehow, he knew that was his name.
Emotions are much smarter than we give them credit for. It is their job to be so, after all.
He walked closer to the light, his eyes becoming wider and wider, mesmerized. He saw the most beautiful thing he would ever see.
Sunlight.
Colorful sky. But before it all were two smiling faces. A bespectacled woman, looking as though she had just scored the most wonderful treasure on earth. A man, smiling knowingly, as if he were the one to bring it to her.
What was this?
"Hello..." the woman choked. "Peso."
Another thought entered his mind, as if vital information were being pumped through to him. Mama.
"Aren't you one of a kind?" Daddy.
Fear smiled, and relaxed some. "Heh..."
"Welcome to your little world, Peso." Peso. That was a nice name. But he wasn't Peso. He was Fear.
Suddenly, his world zoomed out, through the big blue eye of...an infant! Fear gasped, seeing his beautiful baby boy for the first time. His heart swelled. Just a baby...a baby...
This was the baby's ---Peso's world?! It was dark! And cramped! How was he supposed to grow up here? There wasn't enough space and there could be...*shudder*...monsters hiding around every corner.
Monsters...yes, that was the right word...monsters, the unknown...what did a monster look like? He needed to know, so he could keep himself and this baby safe from it. But the information was not being pumped into his head anymore, no longer comforting him with knowledge.
Fear was on his own.
Just him and Peso. Against the world.
And as Fear looked on at the little baby, who observed his parent's face and gurgled curiously, he felt his heart melt. He knew, without the voice in his head telling him, that this baby was also his. And he was going to learn everything he could to keep it safe.
"Hey, kiddo." Fear gently moved closer, putting a hand on the screen--Peso's eye. His beautiful big blue eye, and he swore Peso could feel him, his comforting touch. "Don't you worry. I've got your back. I'm not gonna let a single thing happen to you...Peso."
He took a step back, and bumped into a small stand. A console, with a single button.
Fear gave it a press, and it glowed purple. The little penguin wriggled further into it's bundle of blankets. Fear watched closely. Peso was so small...Fear knew he was needed greatly. To keep this tiny creature safe and happy.
He pushed the button again, and Peso cried in fright. Fear jumped. He hadn't meant to hurt Peso!
How was he going to keep Peso happy if he only knew how to keep him safe?
A Bing sounded throughout the air. Fear turned to see two strange things.
One was a golden ball, running down some sort of contraption, slowing to a stop near the ground. Fear scooped it up quickly, and it showed the most recent memory of Peso.
His mother's comforting kiss.
When Fear turned around, he saw the second strange thing.
A glowing girl, as golden as this orb, was looking over his shoulder, completely mesmerized.
She had come out of the dark!
And strangely, Fear was not scared. He could tell this girl was a light in the dark.
She held out her hand. "I'm Joy."
She wore a blue dress with white and yellow firework-like design on it. Snowflakes, Fear guessed.
"I'm Fear." Joy. So this orb was Joy.
Fear noticed that, in his moments of contemplation, he had failed to see the first memory--a lavender orb containing the confusing first few moments of Peso's life.
And it was full of Fear.
Fear swallowed, and placed it back. Something felt scary...the lavender and purple of his bein actually looked kind of foreboding.
He heard Joy asking in the background if he was okay, and he felt his shoulders go down.
He wasn't going to hurt Peso. He was going to keep Peso from being hurt, even if it took his life.
Peso was the most important thing to him.
And he was hurting Peso now. The first moment with his parent's should have been a happy one.
But now Fear had help.
He wasn't alone. And with this girl's help, he would be able to protect Peso, and keep him happy! Fear would not have to control every aspect of Peso life, with well...Fear.
Peso would be happy, unharmed, safe.
Before Fear could stop himself, he whirled around and hugged Joy. He could feel her warm skin, her bright glowing light, and the world around them illuminated. Fear saw...a headquarters.
Filled with fire and drive, he gestured to the console. "Open to you ma'am."
Joy looked at it with growing excitement and turned to Fear, as if to say 'really?!'
Fear smiled. "Let's keep our boy happy."
Joy pounced on the console, and Peso giggled happily. Fear watched on, oddly satisfied despite not running things firsthand. But he knew Peso was happy and that was good enough for him.
It was his job to protect Peso, and that was what he was going to do.
And he couldn't do it alone.
Fear was just to keep Peso wrapped in a comforting blanket.
You know what? I might do a whole story on this. It deserves it.
But I might copy this whole chapter,😄
UD602.