Blessing y'all with a double update before I go mia again...
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A mess.
That's what the day has consisted of.
It was chaotic as hell as I had multiple zoom meetings happening, two kids in the house, and I had to set up for the night I had planned with Kylie.
Usually, I would just call someone and they would do the work, but because of Covid. I obviously didn't want a stranger in the house.
Especially for something that I could do myself.
It would just take some brainpower and improvising as I truly haven't had to personally set up anything romantic in a couple of years.
Having money has really opened my eyes to a lot of things, but I definitely take small dates for granted because back in the day, I could set shit like this up in a heartbeat.
So throughout the day, I took some time to sneak off into my basement to set up for the night.
Looking at everything I had available, I didn't have very much to pick from.
So I just decided to take the couch cushions and make a bed-like area on the floor.
I grabbed some Christmas lights, pillows, tables- really everything to make it look as professional as possible.
And If I say so myself, I think I did a pretty damn good job.
After turning all of the lights off, I made my way back upstairs.
It was around five so that was earlier than I would normally eat dinner, but I was planning on putting Storm and Roman to sleep early tonight.
So, knowing that Kylie was watching the kids I started cooking dinner.
Deciding to cook something out of my normal burgers, chicken, pasta, or pancakes.
I decided on a hibachi night.
Which wasn't too much.
Just fried rice, sauteed veggies, chicken for the kids, and steak for Kylie and myself.
My original plan was to have the kids eat first, put them to sleep then eat with Kylie. But I decided against that since the food would be extremely cold by then and I wasn't gonna cook two meals tonight.
So when I was done I made my way upstairs to everyone.
"Dinners rea-" I said as I approached the playroom. "What the fuck?" I said genuinely in shock at how many toys were on the floor.
"These two together are trouble," Kylie said to me as I entered the room, kicking toys out of the way to make a walkway.
"Yea, I know." I chuckled lowly at the distraught look Kylie had on her face.
"Mama," I hummed looking down at Stormi. "Hug." My heart melted as she reached her arms out for me.
Picking the girl up, I embraced her in a semi-tight hug.
"Love you." I placed a kiss on her forehead before she laid her head in the crook of my neck.
She was so affectionate it was so cute man.
On the other hand, my boy Roman was paying us no mind. Too busy playing and bothering Kylie.
"Roman," I called out getting his attention. "Let's go eat, twin." I held out my free hand towards him making the boy waddle over to me.
"You cooked?" Kylie asked.
"Why you sound so shocked."
"It's just rare for you to touch a stove." She chuckled at her own words.
"You must've forgotten who I am."
She laughed even harder not taking me seriously at all.
"Have I not cooked for you?" I asked truly thrown off.
"A burger." I chuckled at how she said it.
"And I bet it was fire as hell." She looked at me with no emotion.
"Man," I held out. "Come eat cause you really disrespecting me right now." I said being dramatic, walking out of the room with my kids.
When I got them into their designated seats. I plated their food, placing it in front of them before heading back to the stove to fix Kylie's and mine.
"Okk, it smells good." Kylie said from behind me, placing a hand on my shoulder as she stood on her tippy toes to look at the food. "Looks good." I nodded, finishing putting the food on the plates.
Heading into the dining room, sitting her food down, I then took my seat next to Romann.
Feeding the boy and myself I would peep Kylie eating...
And I think it was safe to say that I shocked Kylie.
Not tryna diss her. But she was boujee and never fully finished a meal at least not with the portion size that I presented her. She would usually just eat the bare minimum no matter how good it was.
But today her plate was clean.
Not even a grain of rice left on the plate.
"Hungry ass." I mumbled jokingly as I walked past Kylie, all of the plates in my hands.
"Asshole." I chuckled when Kylie playfully pushed me.
"I never want to hear you slander my coking ever again, cause you kilt that shit." I turned around, backpedaling into the kitchen to see Kylie.
Laughing when she just flipped me off.
Turning back around, I loaded everything into the dishwasher before heading back into the dinning room.
"So what's the big 'thing' you wanted to do for me tonight?" Kylie asked me as I took Roman out of the highchair.
"When I put these two to sleep you'll see." I started to walk towards the stairs, hand in hand with my children.
And as usual, Stormi was easy to put to sleep, but Roman had to make my life difficult.
We finished eating dinner at around seven and now it was nine and he had just fell asleep.
So when he was settled, I quickly went to my room. Straightening myself up, before heading back downstairs to Kylie.
"Ok," I said when I made it to the living room where the girl was. "You ready?" I asked.
"Yep, let's see what you've been doing all day." I waited for her to reach me before I started to walk towards the basement.
"Don't get your hopes up too much. I just used whatever I could find." I led the girl downstairs.
Once we made it to the area where I set everything up, I quickly left her side to turn the lights on. Smiling to myself when I heard a gasp.
"No way," I grabbed her favorite bottle of wine while I was by the wine cellar. "Y/nn." She held out as I walked back towards her. "This is so cute." She turned towards me, her hands covering her mouth.
"You did all this?" I nodded at the question. "Like no help at all?"
"No one else has been in the house." I sat the wine bottle down next to the lone glass (since I don't drink).
"This is probably the most romantic thing you've done for me." My eyebrows scrunched at the statement.
I know for sure that I had done more romantic stuff than this, but I'll let that slide for now.
"So you like it?" She nodded opening her arms so of course, I hugged the smaller girl.
My hands dropping to her lower back.
"Thank you." She mumbled.
"You don't have to thank me for this." I shook my head. "Let's sit dow-" I started to walk towards the cushions but she stopped me.
"Wait." Was all she said and I moved out of her way knowing that she was about to snap a picture.
"So cute." She muttered once again before we both sat down.
I had a projector screen up so we chose a movie, but honestly, it was really background noise as we spent most of the time talking.
As time went by, our position changed.
We went from sitting up, side by side with the tray between us to her laying diagonally with her legs in my lap.
"Where do you see yourself in five years?" I randomly asked Kylie when we went silent.
"I don't know," She started off, turning to look at me more as I continued to rub my hands over her legs, paying extra attention to the scar on the side of her thigh. "Maybe with more branches of my company. You know that I want to put out swimwear and baby products," I nodded. "Also maybe more kids. I don't know." I nodded once again.
"You still want a soccer team." I joked with the girl, laughing when she fake choked on her glass of wine.
"I definitely want four still, you know I always wanted to have another kid so they would be close in age with Stormi," She took a pause. "But you did that already, so there is no rush now." I actually choked on my drink at the jab.
"Yea." That was all I could say after that. Taking a moment to recover.
"What about you? Where do you see yourself." I let out a low sigh, thinking about my answer.
"I see myself having my own label. Even if that requires me to sign." She nodded. "Maybe more kids... Married... I'm not sure yet." She nodded once again.
"Do you want to live in LA for the rest of your life?" I asked noticing that her eyebrows furrowed.
"What is this a questionnaire?" I chuckled at the statement.
"Nah, I'm just curious." I shrugged.
"Well like always if you get to ask me stuff I get to ask you some as well." I nodded since that was fair.
"But," She started up. "I really can't imagine living anywhere else besides LA. All of my family, plus work is here."
"So when you pass your companies down to Storm or whoever you still plan on living here?"
"Yea."
"Oh." Her eyes stayed locked on mine, reading them.
"Is that a problem?" She asked.
"No, I just thought you would want to get out of the city. You know away from the spotlight, but that's years from now so you have plenty of time to decide."
There was a break in conversation before she asked me a question.
"When do you feel most vulnerable?"
I took a moment to think.
"Honestly in a bad way, around my mom and sister," I chuckled hearing that come from my mouth. "But in a good way with you." A small smile crept onto her face.
We spent at least an hour asking each other questions, whether they were goofy, about business, or Stormi and Roman.
We were just airing everything out.
"Do you plan on releasing any songs that are about our breakup?" That question immediately turned the chill environment serious. "And don't lie and say that you haven't written anything because you write about everything."
"Probably, I don't know yet." I shrugged taking a sip of my drink
"Can I hear them?" I shook my head no. "Y/n.. At least one. I wanna hear how you really feel."
"I tell you how I really feel." I said, my eyebrows furrowed.
"But you express yourself better through music." She kept pressing. "Y/nn," She sat up removing her legs from my lap. "Please."
"You so annoying." I shook my head, but nevertheless, I grabbed my phone that was in front of me.
"What you want to hear?" She perked up, getting closer looking over my shoulder as I scrolled through the hundreds of songs.
"Something good." I paused to look at the girl. Dramatically rolling my eyes as she just smiled at me. "Can I just look through them?" She asked and I passed the girl my phone. Listening to her as she read over the song titles.
"Fucking Fans." She read but it came off as more of a question.
"It's not done." I said in hopes that she would pick a different song, but she didn't. She looked up at me then back down at the phone pressing play.
Hearing the beat and my voice blur through the room.
I didn't care about the song not being finished. It was just that this song was extra personal.
"You said I was fucking up when I was out here fucking fans, damn, and it made you look crazy.
Made you seem, made you feel, it was crazy. While you sit in the house, I be out and you stay worried about me." I tried my best to stray away from Kylie's gaze.
I just wanted to curl up into a ball.
And it's not like she hasn't heard any of my personal songs, it's just this topic was still sensitive to talk about.
"I can not be trusted on my own with nobody. I can not be.. If we broke it off then you know it wasn't painless. If she got a watch hen you know it's not a stainless."
"I was out here fucking fans, I was shameless. Yeah, and I know that, you was at the crib reading stories that they sent you. Most of that was bullshit but some of it I did do. Hard for me to justify the women I was into, especially when the whole entire world wish they had you." I cringed at the words knowing what part was coming up next.
"Then I locked the door that night in Vegas 'cause I had to. Then I had a kid even though I never planned to. I cannot imagine when your girls gave you that news." I felt her eyes burning through my skin.
"I know that. Probably made you want to hit the streets on everything, probably made you want to pour bleach on everything, probably made you want to kill me on everything..."
The rest of the words were a blur.
I hadn't even noticed that the song ended.
"Are you releasing this one?" Kylie handed me my phone back.
"Probably not." She nodded slowly at my response.
The room went silent besides the movie that I completely forgot was playing.
We- well she was taking a moment to think I could tell.
She was probably done with the question game I was playing, but it felt like this was the perfect time to ask about us.
And see if she wanted to progress our relationship again.
"I got one last question," She looked back at me. "From this point in our lives, where do you see us in the future?"
"What do you mean?" I let out a sigh at her response
"Like," I stopped to think of another way to phrase it. "Do you see us getting back together?"
I asked, no longer sugarcoating anything.
But I feel like I should have been around the bush because when she removed her legs from my lap, sitting completely up to look at me.
I didn't like that sign.
So I started to ramble.
"Because, I think- actually I know that we've come a long way from where we were last year. So, I just would like to know if I'm a part of your future like you are a part of mine."
Silence rose again between the two of us.
I was talking too much.
"Uhh," I felt my body sink into the cushion, attempting to disappear from this embarrassment. "We co-parent Stormi, so of course you're a part of my future." My heart literally sank down to my ass.
"Yeaa..." I held out looking over at the screen, nodding my head slowly.
"But," My gaze stayed on the screen, not even wanting to make eye contact with her right now. "You're probably talking relationship-wise."
I thought she was going to continue talking, but she didn't.
So I looked over at her, curious as to why she stopped.
But when we made eye contact she started up again.
"I appreciate gestures like this and flowers you send.. and letters you write... The list could go on. So I see the effort you're putting in... But."
But... There is literally always a but.
"I don't know if I can trust you," I just knew those words were going to be said. "In your words, you didn't 'cheat'," She used air quotes. "But you literally got a girl pregnant and hid it."
I just let her talk, not even thinking of muttering a word.
"I don't know if I can get over that because if you can hide a pregnant 'girlfriend' for however many months, what else can you- or have you been hiding from me."
I took a minute to process what she said.
"I understand."
The vibe had already changed in the room, but it was extra tense now.
"But, you'll never know unless we give it another try."
I said with a very slim amount of hope left in my body.
"Yea..." It was now her turn to hold out the simple word.
"I ain't tryna pressure you to make a decision or make you feel uncomfortable. I just wanted to get a glimpse of where your head is at."
That was the last thing I said because I truly wasn't trying to pressure her.
If she wanted to be together then great. But if she didn't that was fine as well, I'll just move on with life.
I felt awkward sitting next to her, but I didn't want to be the first one to leave.
So I distracted myself with my phone and the new movie that had just started.
About twenty minutes passed and nothing was said until Kylie's voice echoed throughout the room.
"We can try."
"Hmm." I hummed closing my phone, looking over at her.
"We can work on us," A smile rose onto my face. "Slowly though..." I nodded. "So no titles yet."
"That's fine." I shrugged. "Wait.. Because last time I feel like there was miscommunication what do you mean specifically by working on us?" She looked at me like I was crazy.
But even though I wasn't going to have sex or talk with anyone else I just wanted to make sure we were on the same page with everything.
"Y/n," I hummed. "If you plan on sleeping with other people till we're 'official' we might as well not even do this."
"I didn't mean it like that." I chuckled. "It's just- Nevermind."
I decided not to say shit.
"How slow is slow?" I asked a different question.
"Depends." She shrugged with a smirk on her face.
"I just wanna cuddle," She laughed and I cringed at my softness. But to be fair, it's been hellas since I have cuddled. "And maybe a kiss." I added in wiggling my eyebrows.
"Cuddles yeah," She said scooting closer towards me. "But kisses... you're skipping steps." I chuckled as she laid basically on top of me.
"I mean... Last week we skipped a lot of steps." Shee smacked my stomach making me laugh.
"Shut up."
"You missed it didn't you?" That was a broad-ass statement, but Kylie knew what I meant as she hid her face in my chest. Making me laugh even harder.
And we stayed like that as we watched the last movie.
Her in my arms as I ran my hands innocently over her body.
I would catch her sneaking glances up at me and she would catch me looking at her.
I don't know what she was thinking.
But I know I was thanking the lord because there is no way Kylie Jenner should've taken me back. She could literally have anyone in the world and I was lucky enough to get a second chance.
I know for damn sure I'm not gonna fuck up this time around.
Once the movie ended, we both made our way upstairs. Deciding to call it a night as it was almost one in the morning.
We both showered (separately obviously) before taking place in our respective rooms.
Which was her in my room and me in one of the many guest rooms.
I definitely could've been bold and attempted to sleep with her, but I'm not like that.
I wasn't going to be overbearing. Imma move at her pace no matter how fast or slow.
Once I was settled in the guest bed.
The pace of our relationship was moving faster than expected as she opened the door to the room.
"So am I coming in here or are we going to your room?" She asked from the doorway. And I didn't need repeating of that.
I hopped out of the bed, fixing myself as I opted for no shorts just boxers before meeting her at the door.
"Mine for sure." I followed behind the girl as she led me to my bedroom.
When we made it we fell into our natural position of my arm under her body as she cuddled up against me.
My arm will definitely be sore in the morning, but it's all worth it in the end.
"Goodnight." I said placing a kiss onto her forehead before letting out a deep sigh as I laid fully down, sinking into the comfort of my bed.
"Goodnight." She said back, leaving a small kiss on my jaw.
And I'm not even gonna lie, I went to bed smiling.
I've been waiting for this moment for what seems like forever.
I'm just glad we were finally together even if we weren't 'official'.
I could care less about the titles. I just wanted my girl.
And I got her.
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A/n
They back!!
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