I saw my brother sprawled on the bed with his phone, when I came out of the bathroom. The room's door was just being closed when I glanced over it and saw a glimpse of my mom's back, exiting the room. I saw Haxsel look up from his phone, placed it aside, frowning as he saw my swollen red eyes, before opening his arms for me.
Without hesitating, I climbed up to the bed collapsed into my brother's embrace, burying my face on his shirt as he immediately wrapped me in his arms, resting his head over mine. “I'm so sorry, love.” he whispered softly, over my head.
I tilted my head from his chest, to look up at him, slightly surprised at his words. Did he talk with Benjamin?
“I'm sorry you had to go through this situation.” he said sadly. “I never thought my sister would end up like I did once; betrayed and heartbroken. I'm sorry you had to go through this.”
I shrugged sadly, praying I won't break down again. Even if I does, I wonder if there would be any tears left, since I was crying my eyes out in the bathroom. “I think it's me, who has broken Benjamin's heart now.” I said, barely above a whisper, as another lump formed in my throat, that was sore and dry from crying, and I reached out to the flask of water on the table near the bedpost.
“But he broke you first, broke your heart, broke your trust...”
I gulped down the water and set the flask aside, “I don't want to talk about it.” I said, burying my face to his chest again, “Can we skip to something else?”
“Oh okay.” my brother said understandingly. “Um... so, I was texting Jade.” he said after a few seconds.
“You were?” I asked, a bit surprised, “How is she?”
“Oh, she's good. Was just asking about you.” Haxsel said, stroking my hair.
I looked up at him, “You told her about me?” I asked, more surprised.
“Of course I did.” Haxsel said, surprised that why did I ask like that. “Actually, I told mostly all my Christan friends I have, asking them all to pray you.”
“Really?” my eyes lit up, and my heart seemed to become light as well.
“Of course,” my brother chuckled, “One of theirs mom called me all the way from Romania, assuring me that they'll keep you in their prayers.”
“Wait, I had no idea you have friends from Romania.” I asked, more surprised.
“Actually, my friend is here in the States but his family are in Romania, for their missionary work.” Haxsel said. “We met in Israel though, his name is Matt... hew– Matthew.”
“Matthew Matthew?” I inquired, amused by how he was saying his friends name.
Haxsel chuckled, “No, no, it's just Matthew.” he said, “I was texting all of them yesterday, explaining how God healed you.”
I smiled pleased but then frowned, “You didn't tell them about Diana, did you? That she's a terrorist.”
“No, I haven't. Since Jesus told us not to, we can't, can we?” I sighed relieved at his words. “Did you tell him, not to tell anyone?”
Oh Benjamin. No, I didn't, I didn't even got a chance.
“Oh no, I forgot.” I gasped slightly, looking at my brother. What if he tells this to someone? Someone who could be a human-newspaper like my friend Naomi?
“Don't worry, I'll text him.” my brother said, taking out his phone to text Benjamin. Since he has his number, he texted him on WhatsApp.
I watched him typing the message on Benjamin's chat, his last seen was on 7:48am. I closed my eyes, it was somehow hurting me even seeing his name and WhatsApp chat.
I am free now, I did what's right and what God wanted me to do. And I shouldn't dwell in it; I should leave what's in the past, and move on. A move I should start making from this very second on.
“You told me you were texting Jade?” I asked my brother.
“Yeah... but she had to get to work, so we ended the chat.” Haxsel said, more focused on texting.
“Do you like her now?” I asked, surprising myself that I asked such question out of the blue.
“Of course,” Haxsel said as he clicked the send button, sending Benjamin the message, and looked down at me, “I only keep in touch with people I like.” he shrugged.
“But you don't like Benjamin at all.” I raised my eyebrows.
“It's different,” he said, “I'm only texting him for once, not keeping in touch.”
“So, do you like her?” I asked again, tilting my head. My brother opened his mouth to answer me and as I had a feeling that he's going to give the same previous answer, I cut in, adding, “I mean, like you did before.”
Haxsel pursed his lips which he had opened to answer me, and shook his head. “No I don't. What made you ask?” he asked, sighing.
I frowned, hearing him sigh, and regretted that I asked such question. “I'm sorry, I shouldn't have–”
“No, no, no, it's alright.” my brother cut off my words gently. “We both are in the same boat after all.” he chuckled sadly.
I bit my lips, thinking. He's right, we both are in the same boat. “It's just..” I began, “I was wondering who's the one, the lucky one, God has meant for you. I wish if I had asked Jesus about it then.” I said, facepalming.
My brother smiled, moving my hand from my face. “That's fine, honey. I actually don't think about it.” he said, leaving me slightly stunt. “After all, I don't want to make a mistake again. I will wait... until God shows me the right one.”
I glanced at him, impressed. How I wish if I could be like him, not even bothered about such future, though it's been years since he broke up with Jade. “How do you think you will know when the right one shows up?” I asked curiously.
My brother thought for a moment, with his eyebrows scrunched up and lips pursed, and I watched his cute face expression with an amused smile. “I don't know...” Haxsel shook his head after a few seconds. “I don't have a sign from Jesus as you do... but still, I believe, when I see her, the right one, it will hit me like a lightening.” my brother said, staring into space, where I wondered if he's imagining any image in his mind.
I smiled at his words, “You sounds like Prince Eric from The Little Mermaid.”
My brother looked down at me, his eyes flickering with amusement, “You're right. I've always loved that statement.”
“Then I highly hope no lightening hit you when you saw Ariana.” I said, winking to myself.
My brother's mouth slightly opened, “What... excuse me?”
I forced a laugh at my brother's confused face, “She has a huge crush on you!”
Haxsel rolled his eyes, “Only when we were at school.”
“Oh bro, you have no idea!” I playfully slapped his head, “She's still flattering about you, even in front of me! Can you believe it? I was extremely annoyed!” I groaned.
That made him laugh, “Did she?” he asked, ruffling my hair.
I pouted my lips, “Of course, very annoying.” I rolled my eyes, “Oh Hailey, you have no idea how much worried Haxsel was! Oh Hailey, you have no idea, he wouldn't leave the hospital! Oh Hailey, you have no idea about this, you have no idea about that, blah, blah, blah!” I imitated Ariana's words on my style, and my brother was bursting with laughter.
I laughed a little, “Honestly, there's nothing that annoys me the most than someone telling me about my own brother, as if I don't know.” I told him, “You're the last person I was thinking about, before I passed out and I knew, if you see me like that, it'd kill you.”
Haxsel stopped laughing at once and looked at me as though I told him I have an extra invisible head, before he pulled me into his embrace. He didn't say anything, just held me like that, which alone was enough for me to tell what's going on in his head.
“So, do you like her?” I asked him after a moment.
“Who? Ariana? No.”
I stifled a laugh even before I could stop it.
“What's so funny?” Haxsel's amused voice reached my ear.
“Nothing.” I chuckled, “She seems so taken about you.”
Haxsel shrugged, “That's just an obsession, honey. And moreover, she's not my type.”
“I don't blame her though.” I said, looking up at him, smirking. “Not her or anyone who fancies you; you're pretty handsome honestly.”
Haxsel snorted, before it turned into a chuckle and then a laughter. “Why, thank you, beautiful.”
I smiled at him, “You're the best big brother in the world a girl could ever wish for, Jonny, I hope you know that.”
My brother shook his head, smilingly. “You have no idea how happy it makes me to hear how much you appreciate me.” he said, gently. “And, I hope you know that you're the best thing that has ever happened to me.”
I felt tears running in to fill my eyes and I laid my head back on his chest, closing my eyes. “I love you, Jonny.” I whispered.
Haxsel pressed a kiss on top of my head, “I love you too.”
*****
I opened the door of our rented car when we finally reached back to our old home and ran towards the steps to up. Mom handed me the key and I unlocked the main door. My heart began to beat faster out of excitement as I could hear Nicky barking happily.
We got the remaining test result from the hospital earlier than we expected today, that helped us to move back home this soon.
“Nicky!!” I called his name whilst unlocking the door, which wasn't supporting with the key due to how faster I was trying to unlock. “Nicklaus! Your Hailey's back!”
Nicky stopped barking for a moment before he continued, ever louder. I could even hear him bouncing on the floor. And when I finally unlocked the door, my eyes locked with our dear golden retriever, who didn't hesitate before lunging himself on me.
I stumbled back and would've fell down backwards with the force of Nicky, if it wasn't for dad who came and caught me in time. Nicky was restlessly barking happily and bouncing on me, complaining, if I may say. Back in Chicago, all day when I used to come back from school, he used to greet me like he haven't seen me in months and now, his way of greeting me after this long while of departing, is something that I was expecting.
He wouldn't let me get up to my feet as he was all on me and I found myself sitting down on the floor of our veranda, with Haxsel recording a video of ours in his phone, the smile never leaving his lips.
“Why is he so skinny?” I asked, but no one heard. All of them had gotten inside with our things from the hospital and I had to wait until someone showed up. “Don't tell me you weren't eating properly, Nicks.” I said to Nicky, who was panting after his celebration of my coming back home.
“Yes, he wasn't.” I heard dad's voice and glanced up to see him coming out towards us. “And I took him to the hospital, but there's nothing wrong. I think, he was just... mentally down?”
I frowned at dad's words and glanced down at Nicky, “Aww Nicks, I'm sorry....” I know what would've put him mentally down, if dad's guess is right.
“Honey,” dad called me softly, crouching down beside me and putting an arm around me. “it has nothing to do with you.”
“But Jonny told me–”
“I didn't even told Jonny that I took Nicky to hospital.” dad cut off my words gently.
“That's not I was going to say,” I tilted my head sideways to glance at dad's concerned brown eyes. “Jonny told me Nicky was acting weird because I wasn't there.”
“Nicky seemed to understand something was wrong with you, yes, he was also acting to it as well.” Dad said gently, the way I always love hearing him speak. “But what I don't want my dear daughter to worry about is, that Nicky has gone slightly skinny because of her.” he shrugged, “On the bright side, let's say it's good somehow that he loss some weight.”
I laughed at his last words.
“Now come on,” dad smiled and got up to his feet, trying to get Nicky off me, so I can get up as well. “Your mom says, lunch is ready.”
I laughed as dad made Nicky stand up in his two legs while dad held up the other two, supporting him. Nicky had always loved to walk around like this and it was an easy trick to distract him.
We all had a wonderful lunch together after a long while and it was splendid. Later that day, Charlie dropped by, making me grow slightly anxious at his sight, wondering if he carry his cousin everywhere he goes. But to my relief, Nott wasn't with him. Charlie came up to me immediately when his eyes found me, and surprising me, he began to apologise.
I blinked when he came up and clasped my both hands in his and began to pour out. “Oh heck! I'm so sorry Hayles, I didn't mean to bring that idiot with me to hospital yesterday to visit you.” he began, “I knew you would never want to see him again but I had no idea he'd be wanting to visit you when I texted him that you're awake.”
I was slightly take aback. “Oh...” I stuttered, “That's fine... it's alright.” I forced a smile. “Maybe you didn't had to text him...” if you're feeling awfully sorry.
“The point is,” Charlie sighed, “well, I don't know if Haxsel told you or not, but Nott and I visited you earlier when you were in coma, and he told me to tell him when you are awake, and used to text me often asking about you.” he said, with an apologetic smile.
I frowned thinking, biting my lips hard. Why on earth would Nott ever be so concerned about me? After all, I turned down his stupid date proposal.
Charlie left with my brother later, to somewhere he was heading to, or should I say, he dragged my brother who didn't want to leave my side any now. But I told him to go, assuring I'm fine since I'm home.
That evening, my mom's siblings came in to visit me with their families. It was a bit uncomfortable for me, thinking of what they might know about me and Benjamin, including all the incident. But we never told them anything about Diana's true identity, except mom's older brother, Bonnie's and Archer's dad, whom she'd trust her life with.
The next day, however, we had unexpected guests, whom I didn't had the courage to meet; Benjamin's family. Earlier that day, Archer called my brother and told him that the Steakers wants to see me and he'd be bringing them by late evening.
My stomach sank lower when I heard this news and began to grow anxious. I was restless due to my anxiety, that I couldn't even swallow my food. I knew nothing that happened was my fault, I knew that I didn't betrayed their son or broke his heart like he did with mine, but still, they're the family of my ex boyfriend; and worse, what if Benjamin comes along?!
My brother told me over and over again to calm down but I couldn't. And I finally found myself praying to God to make pastor Gale busy enough to cancel this visit to my home. But unfortunately, no one was busy; the Steaker family came to my home with my cousin Archer by late that evening.
My inside was set on fire when I saw their car pulls in to our yard. Jesus, if Benjamin is going to be here... Even before I finished the sentence, my eyes had finished travelling inside the car to see if my ex is here as well. I felt a sudden relief wash over me as I didn't see the boy, whose memories still makes me tear up.
Benjamin wasn't with them, so was Claudia; I didn't find her either. Alecia came up to hug me as soon as she stepped out of the car. Then I was embraced by my cousin, and then by Benjamin's mom, at whose arms I couldn't help but stiffen. I shook hands with pastor Gale, who offered me a kind smile, before we led them in.
As we sat down and spoke –parents to parents– Alecia called me to outside, to talk alone with me. She wanted to apologise for her brother's actions, and to my surprise, she confessed that, it was her, who told Benjamin that we'd a perfect match and was encouraging him, but she never thought her brother would actually take her words and would fall for me. Her words, not mine.
She never liked Meghan ever since her brother began dating her and used to tell him openly that she doesn't like her. Benjamin usually didn't listen to her words, until he had his first break up with Meghan, but he still wouldn't let her go. Finally, when Alecia met me at my cousins' home, and liked me immediately, including all she had heard from Bonnie before, she thought I'd be a perfect match for a brother. Her words again.
Benjamin still loves you, she kept saying every now and then. He feels so sorry for what happened and wouldn't stop blaming himself. He's keeping himself shut in his room and would only let her in. He's never been upset or depressed or disappointed like this before and his dad was furious with him.
For the first time since Alecia began to talk about her brother to me, I found myself frowning, feeling sorry for Benjamin. But I didn't say anything to her but nodded and nodded all over.
I thought, maybe Alecia is trying to convince me for her brother, but I was wrong. She was calling herself stupid for doing this matchmaking for her brother, which has now put the both of us in chaos. “I would never do a matchmake in my life again.” she promised herself, before apologising to me again and asked me to talk with Benjamin at least once before I leave.
I was planning on it already, –though I don't know if I have the courage– since we're leaving, I did wanted to say a goodbye to him. Maybe this Sunday at their Church, earlier before we leave in the Canfields' private jet Max has send to the airport, I hoped to see him; and Meghan as well, I was moved by Holy Spirit that I should talk with her and convinced my dad already for it.
The next day, which was Thursday, we went to see Diana in jail as we had planned. Pastor Gale joined us since I told him what's the mission Jesus has given me. He just wanted to ensure Diana that she'd be welcomed back at the church anytime when God will free her from her prison.
I had taken a newly brought Bible with me, a new journal with a set of pens and a headphone set with nearly hundred of heart-touching christian music downloaded into a small pocket device. Following by the movement in my heart by God, I asked my brother to buy these for Diana, which made my hope rise that, she will indeed be opening her heart to God.
I've been praying the whole last night, preparing for this mission, which is my very first experience.
We walked into the highly guarded quarters, after parking our cars outside. We were passed in through a sencer before going straight to the jail inspector's office. I began to feel slightly uneasy at the sight of the guards with huge guns and didn't let my eyes to see that sight again. Dad must've felt I'm a bit overwhelmed at this, and so he put an arm around my shoulders, offering a gentle smile.
When we finally got to the inspector's office, he welcomed us in, and made us all –me, my dad and brother, and pastor Gale– sit down at his table, facing him. Then he began to question me, firstly asking how do I do, to which I told him about my miraculous recovery, taking advantage of the chance to glorify God. The inspector's face was unable to read when he only nodded to my testimony, and I wondered if he could believe it or not.
The next question was, what exactly happened that day when I got shot.
I swallow hard, nervously; only because pastor Gale was here. And if I am to explain everything to the inspector, it will include what I saw with Benjamin and Meghan, since that was the main point.
But I had to say it, all of it; despite the bitter in the pits of my stomach.
The inspector kept nodded, acknowledging every detail. And the next question was, were Diana and I enemies.
“No, I barely knew her.” was all I had to say.
But this cop was so annoying, he kept questioning me further like, when did we met, what did we talk, where did we met, through whom did I met and blah, blah, blah.
All in between, I was praying to God that please don't let me spit out any truth –that doesn't mean I was lying althrough– about Diana accidentally.
Then there was the last question.
“Do you want to file the case?”
“No.” I said.
“Why not? She nearly killed you, after all.”
“If my Jesus can forgive all who killed Him, I can forgive the one poor girl who tried to hurt me.” I said, suddenly surprised at my own words, which I knew, Holy Spirit was helping me with.
The inspector gave an impressed nod, “That's good, because I wouldn't want to file the case myself too, since what has become of the girl.”
I blinked at his words, “What happened to her?”
“Gone mental.”
“What?!” I blurted out, and turned to my dad and brother.
“You mean...” my dad began, glancing at the inspector.
The inspector nodded, “She's mentally down, under pressure and we had to move her to a special room.” he twirled his pen between his fingers, casually. “It seems, Diana wasn't in her right mind when she shot your daughter, she's having a hard time admitting it to herself.”
“So I... I can't visit her?” I frowned.
“Of course you can,” the inspector said, “we've arranged everything. Diana will be inside the cell, and you could talk with nothing to worry about. Our camera will be watching you.”
I swallowed without him noticing, so I should be careful with what I'll be talking with her. There'll be a camera to watch us.
“Can I ask you something?” I asked the inspector, nervously. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see my brother's head shot up to my side.
“Sure.” the inspector shrugged coolly.
I careful picked my words. “Since my family and I have no problem with Diana and has forgiven her for what she did, would you free her?” I asked, keeping the eye contact with the man in front of me.
He hummed, leaning back on his chair, “An interesting question,” he said. “Would you want her to be free so?”
I nodded, “Yes,”
“Why so?”
“Because everyone deserves a second chance.” I said.
The inspector chuckled silently, “Well, Miss Houston, I must say I'm impressed with you.” he said, and his amusement suddenly died out at next moment as he leaned forward. “But, we need to make sure that, this girl won't do this again. So, it will be up to us to decide.”
I nodded stiffly. I wanted to say back something, with the newfound courage I could feel God has given me to my surprise, but I decided to hold back my tongue; because I know what my God is capable of.
“Now, can I see what's in that bag?” the inspector asked, motioning to the bag in my arms, in which were the items we had bought for Diana.
I passed the backpack to him and waited until he examined every inch of it and allowed me to give it to Diana. He then got up and led us to where Diana was brought to, for this meeting, and let me in, with my dad, brother and pastor Gale waiting outside.
The door of the room closed behind me, and I found myself in a rather dark room, with grey walls and ceiling. The only thing that lit the room was a dim white bulb, hung above the ceiling by the middle, while I began to wonder, where on earth would be the camera.
There was a cell in the room, and as I glanced in through the rails of the iron door, I saw a girl figure sitting down on the floor by the far end corner. The girl was undoubtedly Diana. I wondered why she chose to sit down on the floor while there was a small bed for her to sit on. Diana was sitting up with her head buried on her popped up knees, her dark curly hair that has grown over these days, was loosely tied, falling onto her side.
“Diana?” I cleared my throat before calling her name.
Diana's head shot up to my direction and she squinted her tired dark eyes.
“It's me, Hayline. Hayline Houston.” I said, praying she would recognize me, despite what I heard from the cop about her; mental.
“Hailey?” her voice, broken and hoarse but surprised, and got up to her feet slowly, walking towards the iron door and her slim fingers gripped the rails. “How...” her voice trailed off.
I smiled a tad at her, but it soon was replaced by a frown as I examined her dark face in the dim light. Her beauty was broken, she looked broken and in a mess, she had dark circles under her eyes, darker than her skin and she was rather skinnier than I remember her. “Anything is possible by God, do you remember the sermon we attended that last Sunday at church?” I asked, trying to sound gentle as possible.
I saw tears in her eyes, she immediately closed them and looked away, now biting her bottom lip to control the sob from escaping her mouth. But she wasn't able to hold it back, she broke down, bursting into tears.
I took a closer step to the cell, with tears running to fill my own eyes. “Diana...”
“I'm sorry, I'm so sorry!” she cried with her hands covering her face. “I'm so sorry Hailey!”
“I know Diana, I know you weren't on your right mind, I know you regret.” I said softly. “And I'm here to tell you that I forgive you.”
“I don't deserve it!” she kept crying. “You have no idea who I am! You don't know anything about me... If you do... you... –”
I cut off her words, “Diana,” I whispered, stepping closer to the door, “you shouldn't be saying this here.”
She looked up with teary eyes, confusion written visibly across her face.
“There's a camera here, somewhere hidden, watching us.” I added in a hushed voice. “We should be careful with what we say, they might can hear us as well.”
Diana blinked.
I sighed, “I know who you are and who put you like this.” I said, still in a hushed voice, “Sam Berkley.”
Diana's eyes widened like saucers, “H–h–h–how?” she stammered in horror.
“I think I owe you an explanation.” I said, and told her everything from the beginning, since the time she left my side that day after threatening me; how I didn't die but only passed out, and everything that happened in between which I leaned from my family and friends, and mostly, the part where I was taken to Jesus. I told her all what Jesus told me about her, and I watched her thin body shaking with fear.
“Why are you telling me this?” her voice shook so badly. “Are you going to tell this to the cops?”
I furrowed my eyebrows, “If we ever wanted to get you into more trouble, my parents could've filed the case so earlier. But to answer your question,” I sighed, “No.”
“Why?” a silent sob shook her voice.
“Because that's what Jesus taught us. To love our enemies, and to do good to all who hurts you.” I smiled a tad. “Do you know the reason why Jesus took me to Paradise?”
Diana shook her head.
I continued, “Because He wanted me to come back here to visit you and tell you that,” I paused to take a deep breath that filled my body with goosebumps and my eyes with tears. “Jesus loves you.”
Diana covered her mouth to stop her sobs from escaping, and shook her head, tears streaming down her eyes.
“Yes, He loves you Diana, and He's willing to forgive you.” I said, “All you need to do is, turn your heart to Jesus, give it to Him, surrender yourself and ask for His forgiveness.” I ended up in tears as I was sharing the word of God with her.
“Why?” she choked out, “Why me?”
That made me cry as well, but I held back my tears. “Jesus didn't come for righteous people, Diana, He came for the lost, for the broken, for all who needs Him. Trust me, I was a wretch too, but He chose me as well. That is the whole thing He died for, on the cross, to pay our debts and to purchase us with the price of His blood. He did this for not just one, but for each and every one of us, for the whole world, because He loved us from the very beginning and don't want us to be lost and destroyed.”
Diana was crying helplessly, covering her face. She couldn't find her voice to speak, she was broken inside and out.
“Jesus just need your heart, give it to Him and live up to it. Love Him back and never hurt Him. He can make your past disappear and make you a new creation. You just need to give Him yourself.” I said again.
“What should I do?” she asked in a sob-filled voice. “How can I be saved? I want Jesus.”
My heart suddenly burst out with happiness and found my tears rolling down my eyes. “Are you ready to give your heart to Jesus now?”
“Yes,” Diana nodded with tearful eyes. And I remembered Jesus telling me, how once the words of God had touched her heart when she used to go to Benjamin's dad's Bible study on Saturdays with Meghan, while Meghan and Benjamin were in good deals.
“You must believe in your heart and then confess with your mouth that Jesus Christ is Lord and that God raised Him from the dead.” I said.
Diana nodded and closed her eyes. Her lips won't stop trembling as she opened them for her faith confession. “I believe that... that Jesus Christ is... is the Lord. And I be-believe that, G–God raised Him from... from the... dead.” her words faded into a whisper at last part, and she cried, leaning her forehead to the rails of the iron door. “I'm free.” she looked up at me all of a sudden, “I feel free... a–a burden lifting...” she trailed off, surprised at what's happening in her soul.
I let out a tearful chuckle, “See, Jesus has begun His work on you already.” I said. “Are you willing to pray with me?”
“I don't know how to pray...” she frowned.
“Don't worry about it, God will teach you everything. Now, repeat after me.” I encouraged her, began to pray, like how I felt God lead me in my spirit. It was a prayer of a sinner, praying for mercy of God and, along with Diana, I found myself overwhelmed with tears and with the power of Holy Spirit for the first in forever.
After our prayer, Diana testified that she felt every inch of her heart's burden being lifted off completely at every single word she repeated after my prayer. She looked no more like the broken girl I saw when I entered and I couldn't help but stand in awe at the miracle of God.
Then I told Diana about Jesus' promise to her, that if she'll live up to Him, He'll free her from this prison. Diana had no words to say to this love of God, “I'm going to share Jesus with everyone here!” she said, and I'm pretty sure, a revival will be taking place here upon Diana's testimony, even for the cops.
I slid off the backpack from my shoulder and gave it to Diana through this gap between the rails. She accepted it whole heartedly and thanked, saying she really is in need of these. And when I told her that I'm leaving to Chicago this Sunday, she was sad. Honestly, I felt sad to leave since I got to witness the change in a girl who was a terrorist, but I promised her that I'll keep in touch with her, deciding to ask the permission of the jail inspector and wrote down my phone number in the back page of the journal I gave her.
I wished if I could hug her, I knew she really needed it when she asked me about Meghan and asked to tell Meghan that she's sorry for everything, when I told her I'm planning on seeing Meghan before leaving.
After speaking further more, asking about how it's been in the jail and talking about it and later upon the promise of keeping in touch with each other, I left her, unwillingly, after strengthening her in Christ again. Pastor Gale entered in to see Diana, once I got out and told them what God has done. I think he just wanted to ensure Diana that she'll always be a part of the church family and to give her all the supports she'll need while she's here.
Dad and Haxsel hugged me, with proud and pleased smile on their lips, thanking God. I couldn't stop smiling too, because knowing that you were able to fulfill God's will and complete the mission He entrusted into your hands, was the best thing ever. And I knew, it wasn't me who did it, it was God through me.
*****
I excused myself from my family and my relatives once the Sunday service was over, and went looking for Meghan and Benjamin. I did saw them before the worship started but didn't get to talk with them, also, I had preferred to talk after the worship.
The first one I was planning on seeing was Meghan; I don't know if she knows I'm here, or if she wants to talk with me at all. But Benjamin.... my stomach sank when he came to me immediately when he saw me and asked how am I doing. Before we talked further, he was called to the backstage by a friend of his and left me, telling me that he wants to see me after the worship, before I leave.
I've been having a hard time last night setting my mind to talk with Benjamin, while all our memories were continuingly making my eyes wet.
I inhaled deeply as I walked through the hallway, passing some familiar faces I've been familiar with while I was here and finally I locked eyes with the girl I have been looking for.
Meghan smiled nervously when she saw me and walked towards me from her friends, even when I wasn't calling her to come. I smiled back at her. “How are you?” I asked her as she came closer.
She was taken aback at my question. “Oh, I... I'm good, yeah, good.” she nodded. “What about you?”
I shrugged, “Better.” I said. “I just wanted to say that, I'm going back to Chicago. And it was nice meeting you.”
“Your cousin told me.” Meghan answered with a quick smile, still nervous. I knew she would be, after what happened between her and my ex boyfriend.
“Which one?”
“Archer.” she said. “He's the one who filled me in with the details of you when... when you were in the hospital. Ben wouldn't talk to me and I wanted to know how were you, so I contacted him. He told me everything about your recovery.”
Whoa.
This time I was taken aback.
“I–I had no idea.” I blinked in surprise.
Meghan sighed, her face softening from tensing. “Hailey, I'm so sorry for doing that, I... I was bad, really bad. Ben's right, it's all my fault.” she said, lowering her gaze.
“It's not your fault, it's no one's fault. It was... let's say, meant to happen.” I said, “And, I forgive you.”
Meghan looked up, her pale eyes meeting my dark ones. She shook her head, sadly smiling. “You're too good to do that.”
I smiled back, “Come on, if God can forgive us our big debts, why can't we forgive each others' simple silly mistakes?”
“Ben would never forgive me.” Meghan said, looking away. I didn't miss the disappoinment in her voice, she still loves him. And this time when this thought hit me, no jealousy but sympathy moved in me. “He still thinks... it's my fault, that I ruined everything. And he hates me like he never did before.”
“I'm so sorry to hear that, but hey, it's not at all fair for him to blame you.” I told her. “After all, it was meant to happen. I don't belong together with him.” the words left my mouth as a whisper.
Meghan's eyes shot towards me, wide. “Wh–what?”
“He's not the one God has meant for me, Meghan, we both were jumping into conclusions and God was fixing it.” I said to her, who was staring at me in shock. “We broke up.”
“No.” Meghan whispered in shock, to my huge surprise. “No, oh, now I'm definitely under his hate!”
“Hey, hey, hey,” I grabbed her shoulders. “I told you it's none of your fa–
“But Diana was my friend! It was I, who brought her here!”
I sighed, “Talking about Diana, she asked me to tell you that she's sorry for everything.” I said, and Meghan's eyes grew wider. “I visited her on jail at Jesus' will and talked with her. Guess what? She accepted Him as her savior and the Diana who went mental in the jail was healed within some minutes. By Jesus.”
“What?” Meghan's eyes turned wet, at hearing about her best friend.
“Yes, Meghan, she's changed. She'll come back, and she expects you to welcome her back as her best friend.” I said. And what I didn't expect from her that she'd tackle me in a hug and tell me that I'm a wonderful person. I returned the hug gladly, offering her my friendship if she wants me to be her friend. She happily accepted the offer and the next moment, we looked up at each other as friends, exchanged our phone numbers and promised to keep in touch.
Meghan was extremely sorry me and Benjamin, though I knew she's still in love with him. I told her that I'm routing on them from now on and will be praying because I cause a strong feeling that, maybe it's Meghan, the one God has meant for Benjamin. She told me how she had failed him several times and asked me what's my secret that made him admire me like that. I told her several things like how to treat boys, from my little experience with Benjamin and above all, to seek God's help and guidance.
We both walked away, arm in arm like friends, from the place we were standing to the platform that led down to the ground floor. From above the platform, I saw Benjamin down there and bid goodbye to Meghan, giving her a hug, before walking down the stairs to see him.
Benjamin looked up and saw me coming down, and he walked towards where the stairs stops, with his little sister, hand in hand. There were people here are there talking and laughing with each other, but we didn't mind that, to have a talk of our own. After all, everyone were having there own businesses.
I greeted my ex lover with a small smile before my gaze slid down to his little sister, who was glued to his side, adorable as always. “Hi there, little angel.” I bended down to reach her level.
Claudia smiled back, “Benny told me you're leaving.” it was so sweet hearing her small voice after a long time.
I glanced up at Benjamin briefly and saw him watching us, before returning my gaze to Claudia. “Yeah, I'm leaving.” I nodded smilingly at the blonde.
“Will you be coming back?” she asked, her voice so angelic.
I was surprised at this. “You want me to come back?” I asked her, and she nodded. I took hold of her free hand that Benjamin wasn't holding and continued. “I don't know when, but I promise, we'll meet again, okay, Clau?”
Claudia hummed, shyly nodding.
“Okay, can we hug?” I asked, offering my opened arms. Claudia didn't say anything but smiled, before her tiny arms wrapped around my neck. I held her tiny figure close to me. “You're a sweet little angel girl, you know that? Will you always remember me?” I asked.
“Yes,” she said, pulling back from the hug, smiling up at her brother and then me.
“Claude!!” a singsong male voice rang from our left and Claudia didn't think twice before running to the owner of the voice, my cousin Archer, after biding me a bye.
I stood up as she left, watching her, as my cousin lifted her up to the air. “She likes you so much.” I turned to Benjamin's voice and saw him smiling at his little sister in Archer's arms, before those electric blue eyes turned to me, immediately making me feel a pain in my heart when our eyes met. “She told me that she wants to see you, when I told her you're leaving.” he smiled a tad.
I chuckled silently, “I like her too, she's an angel.” I said, looking aside at Claudia shrieking in my cousin's arms, only to avoid meeting Benjamin's eyes.
“This is not a goodbye, is it?” Benjamin asked softly.
I turned to him, and shrugged. “Well, since my mom's family lives here, I'm pretty sure we'll drop by sometime.” I said, before adding. “So, I hope we'll meet again.”
Benjamin smiled, a smile that didn't reach his eyes. “Dad told me about Diana and what you did.” he said, “I couldn't help but be proud of you.”
I shook my head, smiling. “It wasn't me, Ben. I couldn't change somebody's heart, only God can.” I said. “I did what Jesus asked of me, and He's the one who actually controlled everything. Not me, but God through me.”
Benjamin smiled, a soft one this time. “You know what, this is something I've loved in you the most, the way you always gives God all the glory and humble yourself.” he said. “You inspired me so much, Hailey, I was able to draw nearer to God through those inspirations. I'll be always thankful for you.”
His touching voice made my heartstrings tighten. “I–I had no idea...” I said, not sure of what to say back.
“You won't forget me, would you?”
“Me, forget?” I asked, smiling sadly. “Never.”
“So does this mean, we'll be in touch?” he asked.
I didn't blink, of course I was planning on this same too. “Of course, you are my friend, Ben.” I said. “I had no friends here before I met you and, yeah, I want to keep our friendship.”
Benjamin stared at me. “You always impresses me.”
Our eyes locked for a moment, before I broke it and hugged him. Benjamin was taken by surprise, but he didn't hesitate to hug me back. I blinked back the tears that ran in to fill my eyes. “I'll miss you though.” I whispered.
“I thought you'd be liking to kick me out entirely.” Benjamin chuckled, sadly.
“I thought you knew me better than that, Benny.” I said, pouting dramatically. “That hurts to hear.”
“Ow I'm sorry,” Benjamin pulled back from the hug and made me face him, “did I hurt you?”
I chuckled out, keeping my eyes closed to hide the tears from him. “Oh no, no, no, I was just joking.” I kept chuckling, until a tear slipped down.
“Hey,” Benjamin called softly, wiping away my fallen tear.
I shook my head, keeping my eyes closed. “You're a wonderful person, Ben, and I'm sorry this is how it had to end.”
Benjamin sighed, “It's alright,” he said. “I love you.”
I inhaled, “Ben...”
“I know... I know,” he quickly added gentle, holding my hand. “You don't have to say it back ot feel it back, I know, and I understand that. I just wanted to tell you that... I still do.” he said, assuringly, seeming to accept God's will for us.
I opened my eyes to meet his concerned ones. “You have no idea how much harder it makes me feel every time I hear you say it.” I whispered.
Benjamin nodded knowingly, “And that makes the two of us.” he whispered.
I nodded with a forced tight smile and dried my eyes. “We need to overcome this.” I said.
“Together.” Benjamin added.
“Exactly what I was going to say.” I smiled.
Benjamin smiled, taking hold of my both hands in his, “If this is what God wants, we can do this.” he said and glanced at my back.
I turned to see my brother walking to us, smiling, followed by our parents. They shook hands with Benjamin, and mom hugged him. This signalled me that we're leaving, now.
I turned to Benjamin with a heavy heart, once my family backed away to the exit door. “Goodbye Ben.” I whispered, staring into those electric blue eyes that once captivated me.
“Goodbye Hailey.” Benjamin smiled, not really wanting to admit the words he said. “Text me when you reach your home.”
I nodded, reaching to squeeze his hand and walked away from him, biding goodbyes to the rest of my loved ones there and followed my family out to our rented car. Mom's brother came along with us to our old home to pick up Nicky and grab our packed things and dropped us to the airport, where the Canfields' private jet was waiting for us.
I glanced outside through the window once I got into the jet; here I'll be burying my another painful memory, all for good, looking forward for what God has in His store for me, when I reach back to Chicago.
—— • ——
A/N: Thanks for your patience, my dear favorite reader. I'm so excited to tell you that, the event you all are looking forward to see in this book is going to come nearer than you think. So stay tuned!