D E C E M B E R 1 9 7 6
.・。.・゜✭・.・✧・゜・。.
WHILE THE FIRE ROARED in the Gryffindor Common Room, Clara had her head resting on Fabian's shoulder as she read through one of the many medical books she had borrowed from Madam Pomfrey at the beginning of term. As she skimmed through pages of research about Mumblemumps, she listened to the steady breaths coming from the boy beside her as he slowly dozed off.
Clara never thought she'd be one for public displays of affection but Fabian smelled like cinnamon and honey and his arm that wrapped lazily around her waist made her feel safe from any harm. Not that any harm would come to her within the walls of this castle – that wasn't the point. War was brewing out in the real world, a world Clara did her best to avoid thinking about whenever she wasn't reading The Daily Prophet religiously over breakfast.
Morbidly skimming over the names of muggles who'd been murdered over pieces of toast was a horrible habit she had that Fabian had been keen to break. Still, a war would never come to this castle, she was quite confident of that. It was like living in a different world, one untouched by tragedy and death. She was safe within Hogwarts and safe within Fabian's arms.
The sudden sound of the portrait hole closing as a student left the room roused Fabian who blinked a few times to gather his bearings. When his eyes fell on the girl beside him, he placed a soft kiss to the top of her head.
Clara closed her book and smiled up at him, "Good morning or should I say evening? It's almost dinner, you know."
With a sleepy grin on his face Fabian asked, "Think they'll have shepherd's pie tonight?"
"I'm pretty sure that shepherd's pie is an option every night." she laughed.
Clara rose and held her hand out to him to pull him up off the plus maroon sofa they'd been lounging on. Reluctantly, he took her hand and stood beside her, towering over her small frame. As hungry as Fabian was, he'd have much rather sat in the common room for the rest of the evening with Clara peacefully reading beside him.
But still, the boy had to eat. Seventeen year olds are bottomless pits, or at least that's what his mother would say to him and Gideon every evening. So, the couple exited the portrait hole and made their way down the moving staircases towards the Great Hall with Clara still clutching tightly to her medical textbook. What's wrong with a bit of light reading about the painful pustules caused by a Spattergroit infection over a plate of bangers and mash?
As had become habit over the last few weeks, Fabian had his arm draped casually over Clara's shoulder for the entire journey down from Gryffindor Tower, "Any exciting weekend plans?" he asked.
Clara let out a slightly exasperated sigh, "No, not really. Slughorn's Christmas party is this Friday."
"Not excited to schmooze with Sluggy and his other star pupils?" he asked with an amused grin.
"I just don't know why he's having it so early in the month, it's not exactly how I wanted to spend the night after my eighteenth birthday." she grumbled.
Fabian stopped in his tracks, causing Clara to nearly trip down a step, "Your birthday's on Thursday? Why didn't you tell me?"
She shrugged slightly, "It never came up."
"Lara, you have to skip Sluggy's party. Gid and I will sneak you into the kitchens, we'll have the house elves make you a cake."
"As lovely as that sounds, I can't skip. He's one of the professors writing me a recommendation letter to St. Mungo's, I have to stay on his good side."
Fabian pressed a quick kiss against her temple, "Saturday then, no options. Me, you, Gid, and all the house elves. Hell, bring Marlene and your brother as well."
A smile played at the corner of her lips, "Wouldn't that be breaking at least three different school rules?"
"Live a little, Lara. You only turn eighteen once."
"We'll see."
Fabian smiled at her and pulled her back along their path to dinner, "I hope you know I'm taking that as a yes."
"Of course you are." Clara replied with a grin as she rolled her eyes.
Once finally in the Great Hall, Clara spotted Lily surrounded by her brother and his friends. Even Marlene had decided to join the Gryffindor table and all Clara could hope for was that her best friend was doing her best to reign in the Marauder's antics in her absence. With a quick kiss to her temple and a wink that made Clara's stomach flip like a pancake, Fabian reluctantly left her side to sit at the other end of the table with his twin and Quidditch teammates.
"Move over, then." Clara ordered James so she could sit between him and Lily.
As the boy grumbled under his breath, Clara took a seat and looked over at Lily who mouthed a silent thank you. After giving a kind smile to Lily, Clara brought her attention to Fabian at the other end of the table. He was no doubt talking to his twin and half of the Quidditch team about strategies for their first game against Slytherin, set to take place just after the holidays. At least he was getting it all out of his system at dinner, she thought. Maybe it's because he knew the topic bored Clara to tears and didn't want to subject her to the torture.
"I assume you're going too, then?" Sirius asked, seemingly out of nowhere.
Clara turned to Sirius, but having been much too distracted by a particular auburn haired boy, Clara had no clue what on Earth he was talking about, "Going to what?"
"Lily turned down James here because she's apparently too busy this Friday. Something about Slughorn having a Christmas party, right Evans? I assume Teacher's Pet got an invite as well." he taunted.
Clara helped herself to a serving of shepherd's pie as she rolled her eyes, "Are you jealous you weren't invited?"
Sirius scoffed, "Not a chance. It sounds like a drag. Plus I heard Reg got invited, so I know it'll be a horrible time."
At this, Clara finally met Sirius's gaze. Well and truly looking into his eyes this time – studying them for any signs of pain. More than anyone besides the Mauraders, Clara understood how volatile his home life was. The boy had an incredible poker face, he always seemed so cool and collected no matter what was going on behind closed doors. He raised his eyebrow at her and she shook her head at him before returning her attention to her dinner. Even with all of his constant taunting, she still wanted to make sure Sirius was okay.
But why did she care so much?
.・。.・゜✭・.・✧・゜・。.
On Clara's birthday, Fabian gave her a box of her favourite candy, strawberry Sugar Quills. Several kisses quickly followed, letting her know that he had stolen one or two of the sweets for himself based on the familiar flavour that lingered on his lips. And she couldn't help but think that maybe, just maybe, kissing Fabian might have finally topped Sugar Quills on her list of favourite things. Which was saying a lot. The sweet led her to Honeydukes like a religion each Sunday, after all – they were serious business to her.
Other than the generous gift from Fabian, Clara's birthday was as normal as any other day, just the way she liked it. She didn't want anyone to make a big deal about the occasion. If anything, she'd be happy if everyone simply forgot it all together. Of course, her brother couldn't forget though. Every year, he forced his friends to refrain from pranking her for one day a year. If she really thought about it, the gesture was quite possibly the nicest gift he could possibly give her.
But then came the following evening. Clara found herself sporting a navy coloured wrap dress she'd had her mother owl to her in a panic last week when she learned about Professor Slughorn's party. Her normally unruly dark hair was feathered perfectly around her face and she tried to use the knowledge she'd gathered from watching Marlene do her makeup countless times to try and mimic it on herself, although the results were mediocre at best. When she finally left her dorm, she found Lily already waiting for her in the hallway leading to the stairs. The redhead was playing nervously with a loose thread on her corduroy dress as she gave Clara a feeble smile.
"Alright there, Lily?" Clara asked as she pulled the door to her room closed behind her.
"Yeah, just a bit nervous." she chuckled half-heartedly.
"Why are you nervous? This is what, our fourth or fifth Slugclub Party together?"
"Well, yes but–" the girl's nervous fingers moved from the stray thread of maroon to the bottom of her plaited hair as she twirled the fiery locks around her fingers, "It just feels different this year. He always asks about everyone's family and I know half the people there already judge me enough."
A frown fell on Clara's face, knowing exactly what she was referring to. Professor Slughorn didn't tend to favour his own house too much, but he was Head of Slytherin, and several of the students in attendance came from families who did not care much for muggle-borns like Lily Evans. This would also be her first real encounter with Severus since their falling out just before the summer holiday. Lily had done very well to avoid her former friend in any classes they shared, but being in such close proximity would make it nearly impossible for them to not acknowledge one another's presence.
It didn't take much deducing to notice just how much all of this was truly affecting Lily and part of Clara wanted to offer to skip the whole ordeal all together, but she knew the redhead would say no. The girl was a people-pleasing perfectionist. Even when it came at the detriment of her own happiness.
Clara interlocked her arm with Lily's effectively pulling her anxious fingers away from the ends of her hair, "You give me the signal and I'll give a swift kick in the knee under the table to anyone who makes you feel uncomfortable, alright?"
Finally, a slight smile formed on the redhead's rosy lips as she nodded at her friend, "Alright."
Arm in arm, the two girls descended the steps from the girls' dorms and entered the common room. Like every other Friday night, the Gryffindor common room felt almost like a party scene as roaring laughter and boisterous hollers were exchanged between students creating havoc. In the corner sat Gideon, Fabian, and Peter in the midst of one of their usual Wizard's Chess games. Peter had been spending more and more time away from the rest of the Marauder's as of late, but Clara didn't really pay any mind to it. She honestly couldn't fault him for needing a break from them from time to time.
The boys tended to make their chess games more interesting by betting packets of Droobles or the occasional Sickle or two. This evening, however, it seemed as though Gideon and Peter were teaming up against Fabian as the youngest twin was bent over Peter's shoulder subtlety pointing at different pawns and whispering moves into his ear. Clara couldn't help but notice the determined look in Peter's eye. The soft spoken boy never seemed like much of a competitor, but looks could be deceiving.
"My gorgeous Lily-flower, look at you!" James shouted over the rest of the racket in the common room as he stood up from the armchair near the fire.
The two remaining Marauder's glanced over to the girls and while Remus seemed quite keen on watching how things would play out between James and Lily, Sirius's eyes lingered on Clara. A stormy gaze met hers for only a moment before they dropped, taking in what felt like every inch of her skin before returning them to her face, awarding her with a slight smirk.
"Right, Clara?" Lily spoke up beside her with sharp nudge to her ribs.
For the second time this week, Clara found herself distracted from the conversations going on around her. Though this time, it was because of Sirius's unwavering gaze. A gaze which she broke as she turned her attention to Lily, "I'm sorry, what?"
"I was telling James that we were already running late and should probably go, right?"
"Oh, right." she nodded before glancing once more towards Sirius who had already returned his attention to Remus as if he'd never noticed her at all.
The two of them gave James a quick goodbye, not allowing him the opportunity to pursue Lily's affections any further that evening. Right when Peter was just about to take Fabian's knight, he caught a glimpse of Clara and stood up so quickly. The boy nearly knocked over the entire chess table in the process as Peter caught a tumbling bishop.
"Oi, Lara. Think you can just sneak out without saying goodbye?"
Clara glanced at Lily who pulled her arm away with a smile, "You have two minutes. I'll be outside."
Clara approached the chess table the boys were playing at, she glanced at the board and smiled at Peter before gazing up at Fabian, "He's going to take your knight, you know."
A gentle hand came up to brush a dark curl behind her ear, "As long as he doesn't take my queen."
"Oh brother." Gideon grimaced, "Get a room, you two."
Fabian, ignoring his twin's wishes, gave Clara a quick kiss, whispering a feather light compliment against her lips, "You look quite pretty today."
Clara's heart did a somersault and she was fully prepared to ditch Slughorn's party entirely if it meant she could spend the rest of the evening with Fabian. But she remembered the anxious redhead waiting for her out in the corridor and her conscience reluctantly pulled her from his embrace.
"See you afterwards?" he asked, seemingly reading her mind.
"If you're lucky." she smirked before glancing at Peter once more, "Once you take his knight, the Queen is toast."
Gideon had a wide grin on his face as he turned back to his twin, "I like this one."
Clara quickly exited the portrait hole and found Lily rocking on her heels, impatiently. The two of them relinked arms and made their way down to the Dungeons. Coming all the way down to this part of the castle in the daytime was one thing, but something about cold stone walls illuminated only by green flames after nightfall made her feel starkly out of place.
"Ready, Lil?" she asked as they reached the door to Professor Slughorn's office.
All Lily did was nod. Sensing her friend's reluctance, Clara intertwined her fingers with Lily's as she pushed through the door with her other hand. It seemed like a majority of the students in attendance were Slytherins. Of the students not wearing green ties, Clara could see a meek but bright Hufflepuff girl named Sarah – the girl who Clara remembered as one of Sirius's O.W.L. study partners from last term.
The blonde spent half her time in the library with Sirius studying alone while he pestered her from across the table and the other half her time with him snogging. Though why Clara chose to remember this about the girl was beyond her. Two Ravenclaw students who looked quite proud to be invited were already seated at the table and Clara and Lily were once again the only Gryffindor students invited, to no one's surprise.
Finding their way around the table, Clara felt Lily tighten her grip on her hand when she realised where the Professor had decided to assign their seats. In an unfortunate turn of events, the girls found themselves situated right across from Severus and Regulus. Of all the attendees this evening, those were the only two people that Clara wanted to stay as far away from as possible.
As Slughorn went around the table, enthusiastically interrogating each student on their family's achievements and their personal goals for the future, it felt like a never ending waterfall of narcissism cascading from each student's mouth. When it came time for Regulus to speak, Clara quickly tuned him out. Any mention of Orion and Walburga Black filled Clara with an inexplicable amount of anger. She worried that if she listened to Sirius's brother speak any kind word of admiration towards either parent, Clara would have stood up from the table against her better judgement and shouted that it was all a bunch of Hippogriff dung.
Instead, she merely fought the wave of nausea that crept up her throat as her anxiety increased. It almost was like she felt afraid of Regulus, which she knew was foolish – the boy was two years younger than her. What could a fifth year possibly do to her? But then again, he was being molded and influenced by two of the most despicable people she'd ever had the misfortune of knowing.
At some point, while Clara was swimming in the depths of her thoughts, it came time for her to speak. She only realised this however, because Lily's elbow prodded at her ribs when she hadn't heard Professor Slughorn ask his question. Focus had been eluding her this week.
"Sorry Professor, I was a bit lost in thought there. Could you repeat that?"
"Miss Potter, always got something whirling around in that mind of yours, eh? I was hoping you could tell us all about your father's excellent potion making skills! A talent like that seems to run in your family, doesn't it?"
And so, Clara went into her well rehearsed story, chronicling her father's invention of the Sleakeazy's Hair Potion just as she did at every Slugclub function she was ever invited to. As soon as her story ended, the portly and kind Professor eventually would ask her about her prospects for the future. A question to which she would always reply that she hoped to become a healer. Telling the story felt as stale and old as the biscuits the Professor served with his tea. But he acted as if it was his first time hearing it every single time as he sat there listening with a wide grin on his face.
The rest of the party felt like a blur to Clara, she and Lily stuck by each other's sides like glue near the wall as they did very little to attempt to schmooze the other students who seemed to love hearing themselves speak.
"Clara?"
Behind her came a voice that almost sounded like someone she'd come to know much better. When she turned around, she was met with eyes that felt so just as familiar. Shining like silver stars in the sky, a beacon of mischief and bravery.
It felt like she'd seen these eyes laugh, hurt, sparkle, and scowl hundreds of times. Yet they belonged to a total stranger.
"Hello Regulus."
"How is he?"
Clara widened her eyes as she gazed at the younger boy, "Excuse me?"
Beside her, Lily was doing her best to pretend she wasn't paying any attention as she took a sip of her pumpkin juice and gazed aimlessly at the opposite end of the room.
Regulus glanced over his shoulder, making sure none of his housemates had noticed him speaking with her, "Just tell me if Sirius is well. I know he spends every waking moment with your brother."
The urgency in the boy's voice did little to quell Clara's annoyance. She felt her jaw clench involuntarily. Looking at the boy, she was almost offended that he had the nerve to come and ask her about Sirius after everything their parents had done to drive him away. But she took a deep breath and reminded herself that Regulus was only fifteen, only a child. Sirius said he'd tried to help his brother resist his parent's influence, so she couldn't find it in her heart to fault him entirely – although she certainly wanted to.
"He's fine."
Without asking for any further clarification, the boy nodded and left the two Gryffindor girls alone in the corner once more feeling quite uneasy.
Finally, the party slowly came to an end and the girls made their way out of the Dungeons with haste. Just as they had nearly reached the top of the final staircase that would lead them back up to Gryffindor Tower, Lily came to a sudden halt and glanced over her shoulder.
"What is it?" Clara asked.
The redhead narrowed her eyes behind them before shaking her head, "I thought I heard something."
"Come on, it was probably nothing."
In a cruel twist of fate, the steps they were on suddenly disappeared as the whole flight of stairs turned into a slide. Just as they would if they were two boys trying to sneak their way up into the girls' dorms, the two went sliding all the way to the bottom before landing rather roughly on the stone floor below.
Clara picked herself off the ground with a pained groan and reached her hand out to Lily. As soon as the girls were both back on their feet, a chorus of laughter emerged from behind a nearby suit of armour. An unruly band of boys quickly tumbled out of their hiding spot to proudly take claim for their work.
Now, bear in mind that Lily Evans had always been a kind and patient girl. But even she had her limits. While Clara wasn't pleased with the prank, she'd had a lifetime to grow tired of fighting back. But Lily was positively fuming.
Before the boys could catch their breath from laughing, the redhead had her arms crossed over her chest with a scowl on her face, "Proud, are we?"
"Oh, c'mon Evans, it's just a bit of fun." Sirius smirked, ignoring the venom in the redhead's voice.
"Fun? You think causing bodily harm to a fellow student is fun?"
"We weren't trying to hurt you, it's just a laugh." James faltered ever so slightly when he noticed just how upset the love of his life truly was.
Lily had her lips pressed into such a thin line, they had nearly disappeared entirely as she thought through her next move. For a brief moment, Clara could have sworn she saw a faint glint of fear in her brother's eyes.
"Fifteen points from Gryffindor." the redhead said sternly.
"What?" James's jaw dropped as he looked over his shoulder at Remus, "Can she really take points from her own house?"
"She can." Remus nodded, almost looking amused.
Sirius rolled his eyes with a scoff, "Well Moony can just give them back to us."
"Not to spite her, I can't."
Now all three of the remaining Marauders were gazing up at their tallest friend completely dumbfounded.
"What are you saying, Moony?" Sirius asked with his eyes narrowed.
"I can't just give us fifteen points for no reason, that's not how it works."
"Then what's the bloody point of you being a Prefect?!" James bellowed.
Lily had shed her previous anger and now had a look of pride on her face as she smirked at the boys who had suddenly turned on each other. The ethical grey area of awarding house points had caused quite the rift among the boys.
"You are a wicked one, Lily Evans." Clara chuckled as she nudged her friend's shoulder.