Hope you like it so far! Just a short little disclaimer: Bad chapter is bad.
This is my 1 shit chapter that I will allow (I shouldn't allow any, but still...)
Also, just like last time, Roma's singing is bold italic, while Feli's is just italic.
Don't forget to comment and/or share!
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As I looked around the room, many questions had begun to loom over my head, much like a dark cloud would do on a rainy day. How did I get here? What happened after I blacked out? How long was I out? Did I make nonno and fratello worry too much? Before I could think anymore, a painful throbbing cut off my concentration.
As I stared at the blank ceiling, I raised my arm to cover both of my amber covered eyes. Just as I did so, I could feel the heavy weight by my side begin to shift. A loud yawn came from my left as grandpa moved. As I uncovered one of my eyes to watch him, a sad smile flickered onto my lips, but just for a few moments. I was such a horrible person, I had made Grandpa and Lovino worry.
Grandpa soon opened his honey shaded eyes, which blinked and took in their surroundings. He then stretched his limbs, before he stared at me. I was about to speak, before large, bronze arms wrapped themselves around me. I was then smothered, crushed against nonno's chest.
"Mio Dio!" He breathed, his voice a harsh, fierce whisper. "My god, nipote! Don't ever scare me, scare us like that again!" A shudder ran through him, as I stared in utter surprise, or rather, shock, at the words that came out of his mouth. He rambled on in incoherent Italian for a few moments, as he fumbled out sentences and phrases. He must have been really shaken up, to be in this type of state.
"nonno," I began, though I was soon cut off.
"Do you know how frightened I was?" He mumbled softly, as he cradled me like a small, defenseless infant.
"I thought something horrible happened to you, nipotino. When Lovi picked you up, you looked so pale, so fragile. It was if you were about to break right then and there! We rushed you to the hospital, and your brother even had to call some of his friends! Oh, Mio Dio, Feli.."
"Nonno, I'm fine.." I murmured softly, before I began to squirm. "Except for the fact that you're smothering me to death, ve.." In response to that, Grandpa soon pulled away, before he brought up a chair beside my the hospital stretcher.
"Ve, I'm sorry I made you and fratello worry so much. Mi dispiace," I apologized, and then slowly began to sit up. Grandpa wouldn't let me, though. Instead, he opted to force me to lay down, before he bestowed a small nod.
"It's ok, my grandson," He replied. "Now, let me go get Lovi. I'm sure he'd be happy to see his brother is awake. Hopefully, I'll find the doctor as well." And with that, he turned away, before he walked towards the entryway. As he turned the corner, he spoke for a few moments. Fratello's voice could be heard as he responded back, as well as another's that I couldn't recognize.
I breathed a short sigh, just as my eyes had begun to slip closed for a few moments. When I heard the clicks of hardened footsteps on shiny tiles, I opened one of my eyes to look at the figure in front of me. Of course, it was Lovi.
"Ve.." I started, and gave a small smile.
"Chigi...You idiot!" He suddenly fumed, as he clenched and unclenched his fists. "Why?! Why didn't you tell us you weren't feeling well!?"
Just as I was about to speak, I opened my mouth, before the sight caused me to close it, but not before I let out a small gasp.
Tears.
There were tears in his eyes.
"Fratello," I spoke softly, and stared up at my older brother. His olive colored eyes glared at me with anger, but I had a feeling that underneath it was an overflowing amount of worry. As he did so, I slowly raised my arms up, before I wrapped them gently around my brother. I had to sit up to do so, but I didn't mind it at the moment. I just wanted Lovino to know how sorry I was for making Nonno and him worried.
"I'm sorry, Lovino," I began. "I didn't know I was gonna do that. But I promise it won't happen again, ve~!"
"I..It better not fucking happen a-again, c..c-chigi," He responded, before he hugged me tightly. He rested his head in the crook of my shoulder, his voice hitched at the end. Salty tears dripped onto my back as my brother cried. I patted his back softly, anything to let him know I'm still alright. As we had that moment, I saw movement out the corner of my eye. A figure clad in white soon began to walk towards us, a clipboard in hand.
"Fratello, I think the doctor's here, ve~" I murmured, before I pulled away from him. He nodded, wiping his reddened eyes as he turned to see the doctor. He then walked towards the door, where Roma peeked out.
"Hello, Mr. Vargas," The doctor began.
"Hi!" I responded cheerfully, as I gave a small grin. "Please call me Feliciano, too, ve~!"
"Ok then. My name's Mrs. Laura." She replied, before she stole a look at the clipboard.
"How are you feeling? Any aches or pains anywhere?" She inquired, before she gave her attention to me.
"Not really, just really bad headaches sometimes," Was the reply I gave her. In response, she wrote some things down with her pen, and opened her mouth again. "Though..I can't sleep much anymore, or even eat pasta! I've lost so much weight, that my brother's worried...
"I see. Do you ever have any shortness of breath?"
"Y-Yes.."
"OK. Well, your grandfather told me about your condition while you were out. Now, before I tell you, would you like your family to be in here with you, or do you want me to tell them separately?"
I took a nervous gulp. Why did I have this sinking feeling in my belly? As I stared at the nice woman in front of me, I concentrated. Finally, after I reached a decision, I nodded.
"I...I think it would be best if you told us all..Together." I took in a deep breath. This wasn't going to be easy, and whatever it was, Lovino most likely wouldn't take it well.
"Very well then. Please wait a moment as I bring the two in," With that, she turned away, and went towards the door. When she returned, Lovino, Grandpa Roma, and even Antonio were there.
"Poco Feli!" Antonio cried, as he ran over to my side. I gasped as I was enveloped into his arms, his cheek rubbing against my own. I stared at him in utter shock, before my eyes turned to Lovino.
"Fratello..-" I began.
"It's fine, Feli," Lovino interrupted. "Whatever happens, Antonio has promised to not tell anyone about it."
"Are you settled down?" The doctor interjected. "Because, you may want to sit down for this." I held in a deep breath, and watched as Antonio sat in a nearby chair. Lovino and nonno sat on either side of the bed. Nonno then placed a hand on my own, before he whispered softly.
"Feli, it's OK." He soothed, as he held my hand. I hadn't even noticed how tightly I had held onto the bed sheets.
"As you know, Feliciano has Leukemia," Mrs. Laura began. "You were told it was in stage...3, correct, Mr. Roma?" Nonno nodded, his eyes going from me to the doctor in front of us.
"Yes, that is right."
"And how long ago was that?"
"Just a days ago, on the 19th."
"One more question, Mr. Roma."
"Please, ask away."
"Was Feliciano diagnosed with stage 3, or stage 4 cancer when you first found out?"
"It was..." He paused for a few moments as he turned his head to stare at the three of us. "In the middle."
Even I didn't know that. Whenever I had went to the doctor to know get my check ups, the doctor and nonno would always step out. Whenever I asked, he told me that I was going to be fine. How could he have lied to me, to us about something this serious? Before Lovino could even retort, the doctor continued.
"I see...Well, according to the notes sent by the hospital you went to, as well as the other materials, and these symptoms..." Mrs. Laura took a deep breath, before she stared at me apologetically.
"I apologize, Feliciano. You have progressed into Stage 4 Cancer. And, though there are many medicines for cancer, your specific case of leukemia has none. I'm deeply sorry."
I literally froze. For how long, who knew? I slowly turned my head to nonno, as his hands had begun to slowly start to shake. When I glanced at Lovino, his jaw had slackened, as his eyes had begun to bulge. Antonio simply stared at the doctor, before back at me.
"I.." My throat felt dry. I couldn't find my voice, or even the right words. What could I say when I'm told I'm going to die?
"I...How much..How much time..?" I asked softly, as my eyes drifted up to Mrs. Laura.
"At this point, I would say about seven more months, eight at the most. " She spoke.
"May we..May we please have a little..time alone?" Grandpa Roma's voice caught, just as he finished. Mrs. Laura gave a nod, before she headed out the door.
Lovino was the first one to break down.
"Mio Dio...Il mio cazzo di dio!" He cried, and his fists began to clench. I stared at my brother for a while, before I took a small peek at my grandfather as well. No one had taken it well.
"Maledizione! Come ti permetti di fare questo a mio fratello! " Lovino rambled,as hot, blubbery tears dashed down his face. Antonio, still shell-shocked, placed a hand on his shoulder, in an attempt to calm him down. I thought he would shove it away, and shout out a string of curses. But instead, Lovino hugged him tightly, as he fumbled in incoherent Italian.
"Nonno..." I rasped softly, as I turned my head. Roma had tears in his eyes, and they threatened to come out, too. I raised my arms up, to wrap around Grandpa as a hiccup came to my throat. Nonno soon crushed me against himself, and began to sob. As he did so, tears squeezed out of my eyes as well.
What were we going to do?
I wasn't ever going to be able to go to college.
Or get married to a cute bella.
Or even get to visit Italy again.
I wouldn't be able to do any of that.
A strangled sob escaped me as I hugged my grandfather. Antonio murmured soft things to my brother. I know he tried his best to console fratello.
"Oi, poco tomate..." His voice mumbled softly as he tried to wipe the tears from Lovino's eyes.
"Dammit...Godammit!" Lovino shouted, but his voice grew smaller and smaller.
"Hey, maybe you should step out...Just for a bit." Antonio suggested.
"No! No, I won't. It's his fault! It's all his fault!" He shouted, before he pointed a finger at Roma. "He didn't even fucking tell us how bad Feli really was! He kept it a secret and lied to us! He fucking lied! Bastardo!" I could only watch as my fratello, my headstrong older brother, shouted out obscenities and insults at grandpa. I slowly let my arms drop, before I placed them in my lap, and my eyes lowered down with them. Grandpa Roma's arms slowly subsided from my body, as he cleared his throat.
"Lovino, I.." He took a deep breath before he began again. "Lovino, Feliciano, I'm sorry. I truly, utterly am. I thought that...That if you didn't know how bad you were, that you would keep on fighting it with all your strength, despite the odds. I'm sorry I didn't tell you."
"Grandpa, I-" Before I could finish, Lovino blurted out.
"You damn straight should be sorry, you old geezer! How dare you?! How could you not tell us?! You couldn't even tell Feliciano, your favorite grandson?!"
"Lovino, calm down...Plea-"
"No, Antonio! I will not calm down! That bastard deserves everything that I'm going to say to him! He deserves it a-"
"Fratello! Zitto! " I snapped. I didn't know I could grow so frustrated, but there's a first for everything, I guess. As I tried to calm down, another headache bashed into me, and in effect I laid back down onto the pillows. Everyone clustered around me, their faces etched with worry.
"Lovino," I let out a breath, one I didn't know I had held. "Please..Go outside. Antonio, go with him." Lovino stared at me with a look of shock, before he gave a small nod. Antonio escorted him out, and I looked over at my grandfather.
He seemed really disappointed in himself. I didn't even know where to begin. Both of us sat in silence for a few moments, before I finally decided to speak.
"Why didn't you tell me?" I asked softly. "Why did you keep this big of a secret from us?"
"I..I did it to try and protect you, nipote." He began his explanation. "I did it so that you wouldn't have to...So that you could live out your life to its fullest, without thinking about your deathbed."
I gauged it for a few moments, as I wondered whether to trust him or not. It seemed so difficult.
On one hand, he lied to not just me, but to my brother as well, and it will definitely take a while before something like this is forgiven, especially on Lovino's part.
But, on the other hand, he was my grandfather. He always tried to do what was best for us, even if we didn't see it. He had always, always looked out for us, no matter what. When I had finally come to a decision, I gave a small nod.
Besides, everyone deserved a second chance, right?
"Grandpa, I understand your reasoning..." I sighed and covered my eyes with my arm as another headache throbbed. "I understand it really well, but...It's just...It's just that something big, really big like this, can't be kept a secret. Thank you for always looking out for us. I forgive you. I really do. Though, Lovino might take a while."
Grandpa stared at me for a while, his eyes widened in shock. For a few moments, I thought I had said something wrong. That was, until he crushed me once more, as sobs broke out.
"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" He cried and rustled my hair. I hugged him back, and tried my best to comfort him.
"Ve, don't cry nonno! It makes me sad when you do! Hey, why don't we sing that heaven and hell song to make you feel better, ve?" I asked, as I tried my best to get back into my cheery self. He noticed it too, and sniffled, before he agreed with a nod.
Listen as I tell you what Hell would be-
To begin with all the cooks would be British
The police would all be German
And the engineering would fall to the French
Your lover would unfortunately be Swiss
And all bankers would be from~ Italy
Tears slowly slid down my face as we held each other and finished the song. Sniffles pierced the air as we ended the song, and a sad chuckle slipped from my lips.
"Ve, you should go talk to fratello...I'm sure if you explain it to him, he'll forgive you! He will, don't worry! I'm sure he will, ve!"
"Thank you, Feli. I will, and then we'll get out of the hospital, and treat you to whatever you want. You certainly deserved it."
"Ve~!"
Nothing's going to be the same from now on, I contemplated as grandpa went to the doors. But, we'll get through it, right?