Opening one eye, it was still dark and I'm not sure why I was waking up until I felt something wet moving beside me. Turning on the bedside lamp, I look at Cain and sure enough he's tossing and turning, his skin sleek with sweat. It wasn't an unfamiliar sight, at least not since we'd been back from the other realm and his nightmares only seemed to be getting more intense as the days went on.
"Cain?" Touching his arm, I don't know if I should wake him. "Cain."
Just as I'm about to say his name again, he's up with a gasp. Looking around confused, I give him a second, shifting further to turn to face him.
"Another bad dream?" I whisper, unsure if he even heard me as he doesn't respond. He just wipes his face and heads off into the bathroom. So I sit and wait., toying with the edge of the sheet unsure what to do now.
This is how it goes. He won't talk about it, and I stopped asking. Instead I wait, and the guilt he comes out with is worse than anything else I'd be willing to face. He'd get back into bed and that would be it until the next night. I wasn't sure what it would take to stop it at this point.
"My, hasn't everything changed." Portia mused, suddenly beside me in the bed.
"Because my night couldn't get any better." I groan.
"If you ever wondered what domestic bliss looked like, you just left the honeymoon stage Elise. It only gets worse from here. Secrets. No communication." She frowned, looking serious as she faced me now. "Giving up all you did for whatever this is hardly seems fair."
"I want to be here, I gave up nothing. Is this how it's going to be now?"
Her endless little pop ups, a hello here and a pretend crown on my head there were nearly as reliable as Cain's nightmares each night. Apparently tonight, the two wanted to crossover.
Portia shrugged, glancing towards the bathroom door. "Well, that depends."
"On what?"
"What happens next."
She's gone as the door opens, the exhausted guilty look on Cain's face disappearing as he looked around and stopping at the end of the bed his question was clear.
"Portia." I sigh, laying back down. "Want to talk about it?"
"Not unless she told you how to get rid of her once and for all." Sitting back up, he just shrugs.
"It's practically every night."
"She's been here every night?" His face goes blank, but there's still guilt in his eyes.
"Stupid doesn't look cute on you." Getting up I stand in front of him, forcing him to look at me as he instantly went to move away. "You and me, remember? I gave you time, some space. I wait, every night and you can't say it's nothing because clearly it's something. I know it's all been a lot and I understand, at least some of it, just dont push me away."
His body stiffened as I slid my hand down from the side of his face and onto his chest. Slowly his hand came up to cover mine.
"I'm not pushing you away. There are things I can't-"
"Can't or won't?" He said nothing and with a small nod, I stepped back. "You know, I'm not actually tired anymore. I am just going to take a run."
"Elle," he followed me out into the living room. "It's nearly two in the morning and you don't run."
He had a point.
"She got in my head." I admitted. "Secrets. No communication and-"
"They're just, nightmares. It doesn't mean anything." It felt more like a confession.
"I have them too and I know that's a lie." I sighed. "We're both fucked up, I'm not going to judge or think any differently of you if that's it. I mean, look at me, I can't even sleep alone most of the time."
"They're not just nightmares." he turned to the table, a bottle of whisky appeared as well as two glasses. As he offered me one, I shook my head. "It's like, I'm trapped. And I make the wrong decisions every time."
We end up sitting on the sofa and he tugs me closer, holding my legs as he drops them over his lap. I wait, and after a few sips he continues.
"I'm making excuses, I think I am, but it's like she's still in my head only now I know she's there or at least she was."
"Who, Portia?"
"Eris." He corrected dryly, finishing the glass before it instantly refilled. "They all feared me, hated me, because I am immune to their powers. I was punished for it. They all tried, time and time again."
We never talked much about her and Cain especially never brought her up.
"Her powers worked on you?" I ask softly.
"No. Maybe. I keep thinking about everything and these dreams feel more like visions." He drank again, and looking over towards the kitchen there was no denying who the presence that lingered there was. "Fuck. I don't know."
"Well, we know someone who is an expert on visions-"
"Elle, no. Don't even think about it."
Looking again Portia appeared from the shadows, no longer hiding. "I don't think you have a choice."
He looked up as she sat on the coffee table in front of us, a bold move especially with the dark look he served her with.
"I come in peace." She held up her hands in surrender. "Remember, before there was them, there was you. And her."
"A fact that you only seem to remember when it suits you." Cain narrowed his eyes, the grip he had on my leg tightening. "Keep blurring the lines, Portia, and you might even forget whose side you are playing for."
"Maybe there are no sides." Portia mused.
"Do they know you're here?" I asked and she instantly looked away. "Guess there are then."
"Right now, there's not. I saw something, a vision and I saw this opportunity for us to talk."
Cain downed another glass. "Talk."
"I warned you, Cain," Portia started, folding her arms across her chest as I got the distinct impression the only thing missing now was her old desk and my former headmistress was about to give us a stern talking to. "You did it. You and that ego of yours. I mean really, if you had just-"
"Get to the point." Cain huffed and as he went to drink again, I held back the glass in his hand earning me my own warning which I ignored.
"She saw weakness and used it. You didn't stop her powers from working." Portia explained as if she was bored of all of it. "If anything, you probably wanted them too. You were acting a coward, hiding behind them. Anything you thought, even for a second, was amplified into creation." Her attention focused on me. "Why you remain with him is beyond me. You have been offered far greater things in this life Elise. It's not a nightmare or a vision. They're memories Cain, a gift from your guilt and regret that no amount of liquor will let you escape."
"Thought as much." He growled, pulling his hand free of mine to get to his drink.
"You think we have some grand master plan. A reason to keep you two apart. We don't, not really. The fact is, Nieve and Adala care for you in their way Elise. I have my own reasons too, but at the end of the day we all believe you deserve better. Let his darkness consume him, and leave before he destroys you too." She warned, continuing as if Cain wasn't there. "He has never learned from the past. He never will. It's a self-destructive cycle that he doesn't want to end."
"I think you should go, and if I were you, I'd be thinking very carefully over coming back." My own warning is clear.
"One day you will realise I am right."
"We'll see."
She's gone and the silence that we're left in is deafening. Cain attempts to stand, but I push him back down. Sliding into his lap, I straddle him and meeting his gaze, there's only darkness staring back.
"Don't listen to her."
"It's all true."
"Tell me about Eris. Tell me everything." It's not a request, it's a command and I hear the glass in his hand drop onto the carpet as his hands now sit in the curve of my back. I'm held closer to him and his head dips down to rest on my chest.
"I didn't realise I would miss you. Not how I did. I met her at one of the Others bars. I'd been working with Mattew building one of the new schools. I was tired, sore. I'd lived with them for a couple of weeks, doing what needed to be done. It felt good to be, someone else." He sighed, leaning his head back to look at me. "I was drunk, Faline's sister was looking after us too well. I thought, for a second, she was you. Sitting at the bar. She didn't wear the same clothes as everyone else. They were more of your world. I went over, she had on your perfume. I saw your face when she turned around, and I thought you came back to me."
"Cain-" He shook his head and I stopped.
"After, I realised it wasn't. Trick of light or something, magic perhaps. We got talking, and I wanted to forget you. It was nice. She came by, helped with the school. We got to know each other. I didn't know much about her, but Artemis was the first to warn me, Hades next. Of course I didn't listen. I wanted a distraction and she was it. Portia came next, and again I was facing new enemies as some sought to fight my rule. Powers don't like Others, they hate the council I created. I was tired and alone and it didn't stop. She was always there when I needed her to be."
I bit my lip, unsure what to say and let him continue when he was ready.
"Then Hermes appears with the twins after their failed attempt at God Killer, and they speak only of her and her power. They call me the False King, claiming I'd fall at the God Killers' hands if their King did not claim her first." He shook his head, a tremble going through his body. "That was followed by Apollo returning with Artemis. Anytime he came around, he seemed determined to get under my skin. Like he was challenging himself to see how quickly he could piss me off and he loved wearing that ring. He made sure to boast to any who would listen about your wedding night, about the way you'd been bonded in both realms traditions."
He closed his eyes and I took a deep breath of my own. "He's such a fucking asshole."
"It's in the past, right?" Cain mumbled sarcastically. "And then Eris was there. I think I did know what she was doing, but I just couldn't bring myself to stop her powers. It made me feel numb, yet powerful. And the more that came, the more I proved I couldn't be stopped. They all tried, again and again, my so called friends, my family, they became enemies. There was only Eris, but not really. There would always be one other. A ghost. She still held the most power out of all of us, no matter what I did when the time came, I couldn't kill her."
"Eris knew. She sent so many others after me, and had everything set up here. Even Odin and-"
"And it all shows that I am the undeserving fool Portia claims me to be." He sighed. "And I am selfish, because I can't let you go."
"Good, because I don't want you to." I kissed him, savouring the taste of whisky on his tongue. "I need you to let go of that guilt, and make Portia see she's wrong. I want you by my side and I need you to fight for me, even when you think you don't deserve this. Us."
"Every fucking day."
"Promise?"
"I promise." He claims my mouth once more as the deal is made. "Cross my heart and everything."
A smile pulled at my mouth as I leant back, feeling him groan with frustration as the kiss ended. "I promise too."
"I need to stop her from getting in here like that. Every ward I put up, she manages to break through without me even knowing." His fist clenched against my leg. "I want her to stay out."
"I don't think you can stop her. She has that all knowing, all powerful Fate thing going on," which also made me wonder. "She has been around a lot lately. It's a headache trying to work them out, and lets face it, we have no idea what they're playing at, but do you think she meant what she said about knowing us first? Could she be on our side?"
This he did seem to think about. "We've had our differences over the years. There was a time where we literally couldn't be on the same continent."
"Sounds promising then." I didn't hide my sarcasm.
"Perhaps. When we needed each other, we came together again. Since the Treaty was created, something changed though. I think she actually enjoyed being Headmistress Huntington. She was always so protective over her kids, as she called them."
"If she was going to do something to hurt us, more than her verbal attacks, she's had plenty of wasted opportunities. All of the three have, considering how strong they are meant to be when all together. Look at the wedding. They could have used my family against me,everyone I love was there. It was a perfect storm of events to make us bow to them." I shivered, a touch of fear forcing its way into my heart for the first time as every instinct I had told me that we'd let ourselves underestimate them. "What could they actually want with us?"
"No. Not us. You." I could literally feel the whole change in his aura as that dark cloud descended over him, but I knew he was right. Right now, their biggest challenge was to separate us. "Nothing changes. We just go on as we are, while being prepared for when it does."
"How the hell do we prepare for literally anything?"
His eyes lit up with mischief then, as he even dared to smile. "Well, first things first. We need you to get a new weapon."
"From Rumpels?" I raised an eyebrow, not quite sure where this was going.
"You're not the type of girl I'd take to Rumpels. I have someplace in mind that might just have what you're looking for."
"How many girls have you taken to this, not Rumpels place?" His smile becomes genuine, the hint of jealousy I didn't even know I had slipped through into my question..
"None Elle, I've never met another girl like you before." His kiss is light, barely there yet he tugs on my bottom lip with a not so subtle bite before kissing me harder. "Except this one time, a couple of hundred years ago when the strangest thing happened as I was about to go and change history by creating the Treaty."
The next instant, I'm pinned beneath him on the sofa as he leaves a trail of kisses along my neck. His arms boxed me in, yet my legs were firmly wrapped around his waist stopping him from moving any further down.
"Oh really? What was she like?"
"Beautiful. Brave. Strong. Everything I never knew I wanted." He mumbled against my neck, seeking out that sensitive patch just down from my ear that had me wiggling against him with a tiny giggle. "Or needed."
"That's sweet, but when can we go get my new toy?"
"Really? That's what you're thinking about right now?" He groaned, shaking his head slightly. "I'll need a couple of days. The full moon is tomorrow so we should be okay after that."
I planted a quick kiss on his forehead, suddenly standing by the doorway to the bedroom as he groaned again, spinning around to see where I'd gone.My yawn was fake, as I stretched my arms up.
"Well, I guess it's time to go back to bed now that's all sorted." I called out before suddenly sprinting across the room to the bed as he chased, like I knew he would.
"Still going for that run," Cain mused as he stood at the end of the bed. "or was that it?"
"That was it, but I got a little more energy to spare." Reaching up to pull him closer, I kissed him again; more than a fleeting peck on the forehead this time.
After that the nightmares didn't return.
Or the night after that.