cw - mentions of vomit/feeling sick.
january 2015
houston, tx
"Oh, Ashley!" Aimee grins, having spotted her for the first time tonight.
Ashley offers up her best fake grin, disappointed that she hasn't managed to avoid her all evening.
"Happy birthday," she says, begrudgingly.
"Aw, thank you so much!" Aimee pulls her into a quick hug, which almost makes Ashley feel lightheaded. "I have a bone to pick with you," she teasingly waves a finger in front of Ashley's face. "You were one of the only people who didn't bring a gift!" She laughs it off, but Ashley doesn't find the comment very amusing.
"Yeah, I'm pretty broke at the minute," she shrugs, responding flatly, even though she doesn't think Aimee deserves an explanation at all— Ashley just didn't want to buy her anything.
"I'm only playing," Aimee nudges her shoulder. "Where's Gracie?" She questions, after a moment, and it becomes clear to Ashley that that's the only Aimee spoke to her in the first place.
"Uh, over there," Ashley points in her general direction, earning a small wave as Aimee scurries off.
She can only roll her eyes once she's out of sight, hoping that she doesn't have to see her again for the rest of the evening— or ever again.
After a while, Ashley's head begins to feel heavy; it feels like it's pounding to the beat of the blaring music, and the lump forming on the top of her head is throbbing.
She tries to weave her way through the crowd to get to the front door, thinking that maybe some fresh air will help her to feel a little better.
But, as soon as she steps outside, she feels nauseous, which only makes her panic.
Ashley has emetophobia; the entire subject of vomit freaks her out, let alone actually feeling sick— which means she usually tries to avoid getting sick by any means possible.
It's the main reason she hates eating out so much; she's scared that if she eats too much, she'll be sick— or maybe they cooked the food wrong, and she'll get sick from that. She's not sure if anyone knows that's the reason why, because she's never told anyone; she's too worried that they'll invalidate how she feels.
It's something that's always panicked her, and whenever she is inevitably ill, she can't help but cry helplessly until it's all over.
It takes everything in her not to just collapse in the front yard, because she doesn't want to be mistaken for one of the illegally drunk teenagers that are passed out around her.
She heads back inside after a few minutes, wondering if it's the fading light outside that's making her feel so dizzy, as she desperately tries to push away her nauseous thoughts.
Ashley goes upstairs to find somewhere quieter, and there's a large bedroom, which must belong to Aimee's parents; she enters cautiously, heading over to the corner of the room to sit down. She pulls out her phone, to find a couple of texts from Awsten, and hugs her knees up to her chest as she reads them.
awsten💕
How are you doing?
Just want to make sure
you're okay.
If you need me to pick you
up let me know
Ashley scans through the messages, before quickly deciding on calling him.
"Hey," Awsten answers, easily, a smile having formed on his face at the sight of her contact lighting up his screen, but he doesn't receive a response. "Shelly? Are you okay?" He asks, concerned.
"Uhm, I'm not sure," she answers, honestly, rubbing her hand over her face. "Head hurts. Feel kinda dizzy."
"Dizzy? Fuck, okay," he stands up quickly, grabbing his keys. "I'm coming to get you. Does Gracie need a ride, too?"
"No, I think she's having fun," Ashley mumbles, the sound of Awsten's keys in the background seeming to ring through her ears.
"Alright— make sure you tell her that you're leaving, because she'll worry if she can't find you later," he adds, and Ashley nods, even though he can't see her. "I'll be there as quick as I can, okay?"
"Okay," she mutters, pulling the phone away from her ear when the loud beeps sound to signal the end of the call.
Ashley stands up, swiftly realising that she should've done it much slower, but it's too late now, as she's walking towards the door.
When she gets downstairs, the only thing on her mind is finding Gracie, since she can only seem to concentrate on one thing at a time; thankfully, she finds her pretty quickly.
"Where the hell have you been?" Gracie asks, a worried look on her face, as she holds Ashley by the shoulders to keep her steady.
"I'm leaving," she blurts, as if she'd been holding her breath until she could tell her that.
"You're— huh? Who are you leaving with? If it's Jake, I'm not letting you leave with him. You don't look so great, are you—?"
"Awsten is picking me up," Ashley cuts her off. "He just called me— No, I called him..I think," she says, slowly, beginning to rub her head. "I told him you're staying, is that okay? I didn't want to drag you away and ruin your night because you're having fun but— Oh no, have I already ruined it? Because I need to leave? I'm sorry. Are you mad at me? Do you—"
"Ley, slow down," Gracie cuts her off. "It's okay, I'm not mad at you. You don't need to be sorry. Is Awsten here yet?"
"Uhm," Ashley hums, pulling out her phone, "almost."
"Maybe we should get you some water," Gracie suggests, gently guiding her to the kitchen. "Have you got any water?" She questions Aimee in passing, who only shrugs, continuing to wonder off, hand in hand with Jess. "Great," Gracie mutters, turning back to Ashley who looks even more exhausted.
She quickly searches the fridge, only to find that it's filled with nothing but alcohol.
"Oh! Awsten's here," Ashley chirps, turning around her phone screen to show Gracie the text.
She squints her eyes as she looks at the screen, spotting the pink heart next to Awsten's name.
"Why's he got that emoji?" Gracie finds herself asking.
"Oh, uh, I dunno," Ashley shrugs. "He's uhm— his hair. It's pink. So, pink heart," she answers. It's obvious that her tired haze is affecting how coherent she is right now, so Gracie tries not too think about it too deeply. "Don't worry," Ashley adds, swiftly, "you've got three hearts. But, they're purple. Because you like purple."
"Okay," Gracie nods, "lets get you outside."
"S'alright. I can go by myself," Ashley insists. "I don't want to ruin your night. Stay, have fun, love you," she waves Gracie off, beginning to walk out of the door, before she can even stop her.
On her way out, Ashley accidentally bumps into Jake, the collision only makes her head feel even worse.
"Woah, watch where you're going," he laughs, his hands slipping around her waist. "I've barely seen you all night, where have you been?" Jake slurs, his mouth dangerously close to Ashley's ear, making her want to close up on herself.
Thankfully, Gracie had followed her, and steps between the two of them, before he can whisper anymore incoherent nothings into Ashley's ear.
"Hands off," she grumbles, lowly, linking Ashley's arm and guiding her outside.
"I hate it when he does that," Ashley mumbles, once they're stood out at the front of the house.
"Does what?" Gracie inquires.
Ashley makes an uncomfortable face, her body shivering slightly.
"He gets really close. His tongue is like, almost in my ear. Feels like he's speaking right at my brain," she frowns as she explains, and Gracie finds her jaw clenching.
"Does he do that a lot?" She questions, unsure if she even wants the answer, but Ashley seems to speaking a little more honestly than normal.
She stays quiet, only nodding in response at first.
"I didn't want to wear a dress because of him," she admits, after a moment. "I wasn't going to tell you that...But, I guess I just did," Ashley shrugs.
"He— what?" Gracie asks, confused.
"His hand was on my thigh last time," Ashley's eyebrows dip together firmly. "I didn't like it. I had to keep moving his hand. So, I didn't want to wear a dress," she explains, and Gracie can't help but feel angry that her best friend was in that situation, and she didn't know.
Eventually, Gracie watches the discomfort in Ashley's expression seem to fade when she spots Awsten.
He gets out of the car quickly, and Ashley immediately starts to walk towards him, but stops, turning back to Gracie.
"Oh! Sorry," Ashley hugs her tightly. "Sorry, again. Thank you. Love you. Sorry," she repeats, before releasing her and going back to Awsten.
Gracie blinks as she watches them, the way they're so drawn to each other; they come together so naturally, as if they're magnetic.
Awsten helps Ashley into the car, reminding her to be careful of her head when she gets inside.
Gracie keeps watching how he is with her; he's gently, concerned and caring— she's never seen her brother like that with anyone before, and she wonders if it's always been like that between the two of them.
She's never noticed it before, so maybe it's just a one-off instance— maybe because he feels bad that she hurt her head; but she snaps out of it when Awsten comes over to her.
"Is she okay?" He questions.
"Uh, I think so," Gracie shrugs. "She's getting a little delirious, I think. So, she's either gonna just talk, pretty incoherently, or she might just crash. She seems exhausted."
"Okay, got it," Awsten nods, turning back to look at Ashley, who's sat in the car, with her head pressed against the window. "Let me know if you need a ride later, yeah?"
"Yeah, but I should be all good," Gracie responds, offering him a small smile.
"Alright. Get home safe, I'll see you later," Awsten begins to wave her off.
"Hey, Awsten," Gracie calls after him, before he can get too far away, and he turns back to her. "Just...Keep an eye on her, okay?" She adds, a concerned look on her face.
"Yeah, of course I will," Awsten assures, as if taking care of her could come as second nature to him anyway.
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