For what felt like the millionth time in one week, Maelynn woke up in JJ's room. They had moved overnight so his face was buried in her chest, with his arms around her waist and their legs entangled. She softly ran her fingers through his hair and sighed.
They hadn't really talked about the day before, as JJ was incredibly drunk and they both just wanted to sleep. She was left feeling a little burnt out. His words played through her head again and again. His apology was a nice one, but it couldn't erase what he said.
He wasn't even the first to suggest it. That's what made it stick.
As a child, she was always told how much better Sarah was doing. She was compared to her twin day in and day out. Rafe, ever the asshole he was (especially as a preteen) would make comments on how she was too helpless and sensitive to ever amount to anything. Ward would get angry if she would cry while getting feedback. Rose couldn't handle anyone ever acting like a child. Sarah got annoyed if Maelynn wouldn't do everything she said. Wheezie needed someone stable and in charge.
Maelynn never seemed to fit the bill for anyone.
So she drew in. She stuffed all of her feelings into a ball and buried them deep inside her mind, where no one would find them. She was nice to everyone - even when they were assholes to her. She did anything Sarah wanted her to. She stood up to Rafe and earned his respect. She became more social and mature to please Ward, Rose and Wheezie. Everything she had felt made her who she was got hidden so others would like her.
But when she met the pogues, she let some of that guard slip. She was annoyed and critical and told them when things weren't a good idea. Her smiles were real and almost constant. If she didn't like someone, she made it known. She was overfeeling and let her emotions out. And then, one of the first times she made it known someone's plan was shitty and dangerous, no one listened or backed her up. She was far too stubborn to change her mind. They didn't care.
'You okay?'
She looked down at JJ and mustered a little smile. 'Fine.'
He sat up and leaned over her, resting on one elbow while his free hand brushed hair out of her face. 'I know something's wrong, Mae. You can talk to me.'
'What made you decide telling me I wasn't helpful was the right insult?'
'There weren't actual thoughts,' he replied softly. 'I just said the first thing that came to mind. I was trying so hard to come up with something to hurt you, and all I could think was, she's done so much for us. So I knew the whole time that you aren't unhelpful. Helpful was just the only coherent word in my mind.'
'Oh.'
'Why?'
She hesitated for a minute. Was she really wanting to tell him the most hidden thing about herself? One more glance at his worried face gave her the answer.
'It might take a while to explain.'
He smiled and kissed her. 'I've got all the time in the world, princess.'
ミ⛧ ミ⛧ ミ⛧
They stood in the kitchen a little while later, Maelynn scouring the cabinets for food that wasn't disgusting or expired and JJ simply watching her.
With a cheer she pulled out a package of macaroni. 'Breakfast?'
JJ smiled. 'Perfect.'
She smiled back and got the water ready, giving it a little while to boil. JJ came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. With his head resting on her shoulder, and her hand on his cheek, they began to sway from side to side.
'You know, I never got to dance with you in your pretty dress at Midsummers,' he murmured. She smiled and turned in his grasp.
'You can dance with me now.'
They started to spin around the kitchen to music in their minds. He nearly dropped her in dips a couple of times, which led to laughing fits from them both. She even dipped him - far more gracefully than his had been.
'Hey- woah!'
They looked up at Pope and Kiara, who had appeared without their knowledge in the doorway.
'Kissed and made up, did we?' Kiara asked with a smile. JJ smirked and squeezed Maelynn's sides.
'Always do.'
Pope shook his head. 'Y'all make me feel so lonely sometimes.'
'Ha!'
'Rude.'
Maelynn smiled and moved out of JJ's grasp. The water was boiling, so she poured in the pasta and turned to her friends. 'Would anyone else like macaroni for breakfast?'
ミ⛧ ミ⛧ ミ⛧
'I need to go.'
John B had come and gone, with a gun, a motorbike and an accusation: Maelynn's father had killed his.
'I'll come with,' JJ followed after her. She put a hand on his chest to stop him.
'I'm going to be in a lot of trouble for sneaking out already, and I don't want to drag you into it. Dad also thinks I've been sleeping over at Kiara's and hanging out with only her.'
He crossed his arms over his chest. 'So you don't want your dad to know your boyfriend's a pogue? Is that it?'
'No, JJ. I don't want my dad to know I've been sleeping over with a boy for nearly a week. And literally sleeping with him as well.'
'Oh. That makes more sense.'
She pressed a long kiss to his mouth. 'When the time is right, I'll tell dad and Rose all about you, and you'll get to talk to Wheezie and my parents more. I promise.'
'Okay. Get going, love. You'll want to minimize the damage.'
'Thanks. I love you!'
He smacked her ass as she ran off. 'Love you more, princess.'
She smiled and waved at the pogues as she sped off in the direction of her house. There had better be a good explanation as to what the actual fuck John B was on about.
'Dad?' she yelled as soon as she got in. Rose came out of their shared office and frowned at Maelynn's sudden appearance.
'Your dad and Sarah just left, but when they get back, you and your father need to have a talk about you jumping out of your bedroom window.'
She rolled her eyes. 'Got it. Thanks.'
Wheezie came down the stairs and made a beeline for her older sister. 'Did you go see JJ? Is that why you left?'
Maelynn cringed. Rose's frown deepened as she looked between her stepdaughters. 'Who?'
'Oh, shit,' Wheezie whispered. 'Sorry!'
'I can't do this right now,' Maelynn said and walked up to her room. Her door had apparently been removed as punishment for sneaking out. Fat lot of good that would do. She could leave easier with it gone. So she settled for hiding out in her bathroom with that door shut and locked. She curled herself up in her bathtub and opened her messages.
maelynn <3
dad found out i left last night
my door is gone
its ridiculous
im hiding in my bathtub
pretty boy jj <3
tf do they think thats gonna do
u can just leave the house quieter now
maelynn <3
EXACTLY
im trying very hard not 2 laugh rn
its so stupid its funny
pretty boy jj <3
r u coming back soon
maelynn <3
cant
dad and s r gone
have to wait so i can get talked at for leaving
he prolly didnt even notice until he left
anyways
how u be
pretty boy jj <3
missing u
as per usual
i love u
maelynn <3
ur such a sap sometimes
i love and miss u 2
u want me to stay over again tn?
pretty boy jj <3
i am NOT a sap
but yes pls
if u can get out
maelynn <3
its not like they can trap me
they stole my door
pretty boy jj <3
true
shit
i gtg
maelynn <3
is everyone ok???
pretty boy jj <3
jbs back
freaking the fuck out
ill call u and c u later k?
maelynn <3
kk
love u lots
pretty boy jj <3
love u more princess
<3
maelynn <3
<3
ミ⛧ ミ⛧ ミ⛧
1356 words.
written august 19/21.