Season Seven Episode Four: The Feud!
"Hello, and welcome to another episode of the craziest game in the galaxy, Garfle Warfle Snick! And now, the host of Garfle Warfle Snick; Bob!"
Millie shielded her eyes as she was raised up on a platform, her fellow Paladins right besides her as they were raised onto what looked to be the set of a game show. Everyone was looking around, murmuring their confusion.
"Hi there!" a small green alien greeted, flying up on some sort of hovering chair. "Tell us your name and where you're from."
"What is this?" Keith asked.
"Uh oh, looks like somebody wasn't listening to Norlox. Tell 'em what this is, everybody."
"Garfle Warfle Snick!" an invisible audience cheered.
"That's right, the name of the game is Garfle Warfle Snick. Now tell us your name, son."
"My name is Keith," Keith said. "How did we get here?"
"I'll tell you how Norlox got to be on the show, his uncle owns the studio," the alien said. The audience laughed as Norlox glared. "All right Keith, why dont you introduce us to the rest of your team?"
"We're the paladins of Voltron," Keith said. "This is Allura, Hunk, Lance, Pidge, and Millie. But you haven't answered my question. How did we get here?"
"I hope not the same way I got here," Bob said. He went into a long rant about his trip to the studio, his chair turning upside down and right side up while he did so.
"I don't think he'll answer," Millie whispered to Keith.
"All right, Keith, I'm sure you know how to play our game." He launched into an explanation about how the game worked, saying that you essentially needed a certain amount of points or you would be trapped for eternity. Everyone voiced their complaints.
"I don't know who you are, or what's going on here, but we're leaving," Keith said, moving to start walking away.
"Oh, I don't think so." Their feet all became stuck to the floor, everyone trying to get them unstuck and having no luck. "See, all of you are guests on my show, and you will play my game as long as I want you to. Understand?" Everyone nodded. "Great! Let's start with our first warfle. Tell us what it is, Norlox!"
"The first warfle is... pictation!" Norlox announced, the crowd cheering.
Keith was taken to stand in front of a screen, Bob explaining that it worked like pictionary. Keith began drawing, Allura guessing pretty quickly that it was an Arusian. The next picture was of a sword, which Pidge guessed was meant to mean the Blade of Marmora almost immediately.
The next drawing was of a cat, Millie calling such out. "Cat! Lion?" Keith nodded and pointed to himself. It didn't have wings, sk she guessed Red Lion, a dinging noise sounding.
The final drawing looked like a person in a cape, but Lance wouldn't shut up so Millie could say so. Instead, the timer ran out and Bob announced that the other team would have the chance to steal.
"What other team?" Hunk asked.
Zarkon, Haggar, Lotor, and a short Galra Millie didn't reignited all appeared, Bob explaining what was going on to them.
"Well I'd rather steal their lions than their points!" Zarkon said in a happy manner, chuckling.
"Was Zarkon always this funny?" Millie asked Pidge. "He seems like like avyual dad or something now."
Zarkon guessed the answer correctly, and they were given the option to pass or play. Lotor was demanding they play, saying he had spent centuries perfecting his art.
"I treasure your art," Haggar said, reaching to put a hand on Lotor's arm.
"Do not touch me, you filthy, filthy hag!" Lotor said.
"Don't speak to her that way you insolent whelp!" Zarkon scolded. Lotor turned away, smacking the short Galra before continuing on to start brooding.
Zarkon decides on passing, saying he would also play a card which Bob then called the solo card.
"That means one of these Paladins is gonna have to take the next warfler alone," Bob said. "The question is, Zarkon, which one is it gonna be?"
"Well, I think there's really no choice here, so no going with the dumb one," Zarkon said, pointing at Lance. Lance looked around a bit as if questioning if it were him, giving a hurt protest after realizing it was him Zarkon was referring to.
"I'm the dumb one?!" he protested.
Bob announced that there would be a sponsor, and a few minutes later he gave the audience a recap on what had happened. Lance was next to him.
"Hey, Lance. How's it going?" Bob asked.
"Well, I'm not too happy about being reffered to as the dumb one," Lance told him.
"Well, now you've got a chance to change all that and show everyone how smart you really can be," Bob announced. "Are you ready for that?"
"Absolutely!"
"Alright! Let's give Lance a big round of applause for being such a great sport." The audience clapped for him. "Norlox, tell Lance what the next Warfler is."
"The next Warfler is Faces from the Past!" Norlox announced.
Bob explained the rules of the game, lowering a shield around Lance so that he couldn't get hints from anyone. He was shown faces of people he met, first being Antok, and then Swirn, and then Rolo. They were on the last face when Bob revealed that if Lance didn't get it right he would be fed to the Snick, a giant alien creature that looked hungry.
Bii-boh-bi was the last face, and Lamce got it immediately. He wasn't to be fed to the Snick, and everyone booed.
"They are savages," Bob said, reffering to the audience. He turned to Zarkon's crew. "Well, sorry Zarkon, but looks like you're going home." The Galra crew groaned.
The next game was the Garflator, which meant that Lance had to answer five questions correctly in order to get enough credits for them to go home, or he would be cooked alive in the Garflator. Bii-Boh-Bi appeared, and they played a sort of game of charades, Lance getting them all right up until the last one.
He was thrown in the Garflator, and Bii-Boh-Bi left. They played an ad for Vrepit Sal's before appearing on the show again, Bob explaining that the team could play and get Lance out of the tank full of goo that would melt through his skin.
Bob moved over to Allura who asked what they were doing there and explained that the universe needed Voltron.
"Well then, the Paladins of Voltron are just gonna have to get serious," Bob said. "Now, who do you want to play to get Lance out of the tank, huh? Who's the brainiest of the team?"
Everyone pointed to Pidge.
Pidge was brought to the center of the stage, and the next game was announced. A miniature golf course appeared on the stage, and Pidge pointed it out only for Bob to be confused.
Pidge spent a while figuring out her shot, eventually smacking the ball directly into the camera and ricocheting it off said camera and into Bob, who fell over. She tackled him, only for an alarm to blare and Bon to dissappear and reappear in the center of the stage.
"Looks like the Paladins of Voltron have made it to the final stage," Bob announced. He explained that one of them would be allowed to leave, and that they had blazzle hoochas to write down who they wanted to be allowed to leave.
Hunk ended up voting for Allura, Allura picked Pidge, Lance picked Keith, Keith picked Millie, Millie picked Lance, and Pidge picked Hunk. They were told to explain their reasoning, and everyone did so until it got to Keith's turn.
"Millie's pregnant," he said. "Plain and simple. She and the baby deserve to be out of here more than anyone." Everyone stared at Keith in sock, including Millie.
"Well, congratulations, you two!" Bob said. "Now, no one voted for themselves. Everyone wanted someone else to leave, and every single one of you got a vote."
"So I guess we all get fed to the snick or something now, huh?" Lance said.
Bob got really close to them, his voice intimidating. "You all get... Quaz-Cenbullion credits!" he announced happily. "You win!"
The team began cheering, the audience along with them. Bob said the outro, and they all woke up to an alarm blaring. Dallas was next to Millie, laying by her seat to protect her.
"Hey guys, I just kinda dozed off for a second and had this crazy dream," Hunk said.
"Garfle warfle snick?" Pidge asked hesitantly.
"No way."
"You guys saw that too?" Keith asked.
"So wait, that means Bob is real?" Lance asked.
"Bob?" Coran asked. "Did you all meet Bob?" Allura asked if Coran knew him, and Coran told a story about an all-knowing, interdimensional being that judges the worth of great warriors, and how said being was named Bob. "The legends say that of you meet Bob and live to tell the tale, you're destined for great things indeed."
"The guy was kind of a jerk though, right?" Keith asked after a quiet moment. Everyone agreed.
"Wait, so if the dream was real... Millie's pregnant?!" Lancr exclaimed.
"Millie's what now?!" Shiro asked.