It was a few hours now.
I got up and started searching for light in my eyes. The sun has set, and I realised we both napped after our embrace a few hours ago.
I turn around and see him peacefully sleeping. It was not like I didn't see him shirtless before, but this felt different. His warmth surrounded my body. I felt his legs entangled with mine. His chest warmed my shoulders.
Slowly, I could smell his scent mixed with mine. He had long lashes, and I cannot believe I never noticed before.
His arm was around me. He definitely was a man written by a woman. A woman who wanted to be love and love someone back without any hurt. A woman who understood that love is only broken if one chooses to break with it. Someone who knew that love has no place for arrogance, guilt, or sorrow. It is all about innocence and compromise, and bravery. I felt few tears in my eyes.
I softly placed my hand on his cheek. He softly moved in closer to me. He pulled me closer. My body heated up. He was beautiful. He was calm. He didn't bring chaos. He brought love and admiration. When did I get lucky? And Why?
I kept looking at him for long minutes now.
"Good evening." He softly spoke. His voice sounded different. If I weren't lying on the bed, I would have dropped somewhere to sit. It intimidated me. I didn't realise he'd wake up.
I softly smile. He opened his eyes. He removed a few hair strands from my face to see me better.
He softly pulled me closer to his chest.
"This is cruel." I say.
"Hmm?" He hums.
"I want to keep looking at you." I say.
"Its much crueler for me." He repeats.
"Why?" I softly ask. My cheeks were closer to his chest now. I heard his heartbeat getting faster.
"I feel you're going to disappear again." He speaks. I bury myself further into his arms, feeling a little guilty.
"I want you in front of my sight every time, yet want to hold you close. If I hold you too close, I lose the sight of you...." He explains. The words had a different metaphor inside them.
Sometimes loving someone too much might make you forget how to love them in the first place.
I realised what he meant. I loved him the day we spent time together. But my perception of love was different. I pushed him away when he just wanted to stay in touch. We couldn't sync our versions of love.
"I am sorry." I tell him.
" You left before because you were afraid I would leave you too." He mentions. I close my eyes. He discovered me before I even did for myself. Ushijima has always been straightforward.
"You push others away before they can push you away."
"But y/n. I am never meant to leave you. Nobody can separate me from you." He reveals. My tears muffle onto his chest. He softly lifted my face and placed a deep kiss on my lips.
I breathed in and kissed him back.
He wiped my tears.
"This is forever." He says.
After few minutes of cuddling, his alarm rang.
I realised I was hungry. I felt well-rested. I slowly got up as he reached for the phone. It was around 8 pm.
As I got up from the bed, my leg almost gave up. He loved me really hard, a good few hours ago.
I quickly sat down to massage my thighs and feet, exposed to the rigorous regime in between our love routine.
Ushijima softly came and knelt. He took my feet and massaged them. I felt a little ticklish. He later reached my calf muscles and massaged them. I shied away from them as he continued.
I felt a soft kiss on my thighs, signalling that he was done.
"Does it feel better now?" he asks. I nod.
"Sorry if I was too rough." he explained. I jumped out of embarrassment.
"no..yes...I mean...I liked it." I tell him.
"You like it rough?" He asks stoically. I grit my teeth. Gosh!!! Why is he like that?
"No I mean...don't worry about it." I tell him.
"Okay. I won't be too rough next time." He says. I furrow. GOSH, this guy doesn't get it does he?
"No Wakatoshi...girls..um how do I explain..?" I say.
"I want you to feel comfortable." He explains.
"I was, you bring me comfort every time. But I meant to say, I...ugh. Wakatoshi. I like it rough." I blurt out. I cannot believe I said it. I know he was my first time, but I know we will have an amazing sex life. I don't want him to change.
"Your legs quivered at the end, I got worried." He innocently said.
Good lord, I love him. I cannot...
"Its a good sign...that means I climaxed." I explain.
"Oh right!" He replies. I giggle a little.
I quickly hold his hands, embracing them.
"Wakatoshi, you are amazing in bed. Don't worry about it too much okay? I'll let you know if I need something different." I explain.
His stoic face softly turned into a smile. He pulled me closer, clutching my waist softly.
He left a soft kiss on my forehead.
I close my eyes.
Our little embrace broke.
My stomach grumbled.
"Hungry?" he chuckles a little. I realised his jawline tightened every time he chuckled, looking down. It looked hot.
"For you? Yes. For food? Very much." I joke. He closes his eyes and chuckles further, petting my hair.
"Let's go cook something," I say, dragging him to the kitchen.
I go to the kitchen. It was relatively empty, but he had rice and other ingredients perfect for onigiri, fried egg and a simple soup.
"Do I need to go to grocery store to get something? We can also order." He says.
"No!" I interfere. I really wanted to cook for him. Although stereotypical, I wanted to wife him up.
I explore the kitchen, and I realised the microwave wasn't working cause I wanted to defrost something.
"Umm Wakatoshi...the microwave is not working...." I say.
He looks up and immediately looks behind the microwave.
"Give me a second.." He says. After few seconds, he comes with a tool bag. I was shocked. He can fix this?
"Its a problem with the socket not the microwave.." he immediately realises. I was confused.
"Just attach the wire to a different power socket. I'll fix this one." He says.
"You don't have to right now.." I say.
"Its okay, it will take me few minutes." he spoke. I realise he was a perfectionist.
As I got busy with cooking, I realised he was already done. He almost dismantled the socket and attached different wires inside.
"How do you know so much about wiring and everything...?" I ask. He was supposed to be a volleyball player.
"University..." He hums. I was confused.
"Huh?" I got confused.
"Oh right." he spoke stoically. I was confused by his reply.
"I have a masters in Mechanical Engineering. " He stated. My mouth stayed open.
I stood there for solid few seconds, just shocked.
"WHAT?" I exclaimed.
"I thought you knew." He said.
"NO? What?...I thought you just played volleyball...I what..." I mumbled random words.
"My family kinda forced me to have a degree. I was kind of good with science and physics, so I went along with it. " he explains. My eyes lowered slowly.
"Did you like it? Your program?" I asked. He nodded.
"I actually thank my mother for only that. I liked it. It made sense unlike other subjects, which were more subjective and less calculative. I disliked things that I cannot figure out. " he explains. I gulp a little.
He later puts the mixer's wire into the socket. The mixer is fixed. He actually fixed it.
"Wow. Thats cool. I explain. I can never do anything much with machinery."
" That's alright. You have your own set of skill that I can never acquire." he explains, as he slowly walks towards me and kisses my cheek. The kiss felt formal and stoic like him, but this is Ushijima we are talking about.
I slowly made him taste the soup I made. He nodded.
"It's delicious!" He says.
"And little sweet. Like you." I reply. He kindly smiles.
"You always know what I want to eat." he replies.
"That's my job." I reply. I smile back.
"I am intending to make the contract last forever then." he joked for the first time in few weeks. I chuckled and kissed his cheek lovingly.
As we helped each other around the kitchen, we heard the bell rung. I got a little scared of who it might be.
Ushijima went to the door to check. I could see a middle-aged lady from the door-security footage.
"Okaasan?" Ushijima blurt out.