sorry this took longer than usual. i got my wisdom teeth out and proceeded to lose all function lol
also, i saw barbie and tell me if i'm the only one who thinks Dick gives major kenergy
happy reading :)
Mount Justice
March 21, 17:33 EDT
"Aquaman has all of Atlantis on the case," Mal told the three of us. "He said they're quote-unquote 'searching the seven seas,' for Lagoon Boy and his captors. But it's a big planet and that's a lot of water."
"We'll find La'gaan," Conner put a hand on Mal's shoulder.
"And Aqualad."
Dick and I shared a similar guilty look, before doing the only thing we could: disappear. We split off into different parts of the cave; my feet led me to the room I still can't seem to avoid.
"Uh sorry. Mourning makes me hungry." Impulse and some of the other kids were staring at Artemis' memorial. Then he noticed I joined, "Beautiful! Nice for you to join us."
Jaime grabbed Impulse suddenly, accusing him for stealing snacks.
"What're you doing here?" Tim asked.
"Just uh..." my eyes couldn't help but glance at his hologram, "Seeing a friend."
Gotham City
TWO YEARS EARLIER
The minute I stepped inside, I was too exhausted to pay mind to all the boxes littering the floor. The same boxes we've yet to unpack for nearly a month now. All I knew was that my legs ached and my eyes felt heavy.
I fell into the bed, expecting sleep to hit me instantly; instead I found myself tossing and turning for ten minutes. Every night had become exactly the same. My body begging for sleep, but my mind saying no.
I got back up, heading into the living room to sit in front of an empty canvas on the easel. Nothing happened after that. I sat for what felt like forever, spinning a pencil in my fingers finding nothing worthy enough to create. I tried sketching random things, but even that ceased to distract me after a while. So, I ended up trudging towards the bathroom, rummaging through drawers until I found the hidden pack of cigarettes.
I took them with me, out to the terrace where it had begun to rain.
Perfect.
I sat in the rain anyway, letting it wash over me while I cupped the cigarette in hand to light it. Then, I felt the smoke fill my mouth, then my chest, until it poured out again into the chilled air. I stayed that way for some time, slumped in my seat, the cigarette reaching my mouth every so often.
Our terrace didn't face anything other than the wall of another apartment building. There was no view except the dark street below and brick. The cold air felt nice though, so did the rain dripping down my hair and back. It made the world feel quiet.
"I thought I told you to quit."
I looked over my shoulder to see Dick leaning against the terrace door. "I thought you weren't coming home tonight."
"Sorry to disappoint." I took note of the way the rain fell into his dark hair, kept in mind the scars I knew trailed his body; most of all, I watched his eyes—that deep color that anchored me to the ground. "You alright?"
"Of course I am."
"I thought," he stole the cigarette from my hand and put it out, "you'd be asleep by now."
I scooted aside, making room for him on the dusty sun chair."I couldn't."
We stayed there, me tucked into his side while our hands grazed one another's. Our fingers did their own intimate dance as the rain pattered. "Why couldn't you sleep?"
"Lot on my mind."
"Like what?"
"The team... You."
"So, I'm the one keeping you up?"
I laughed for a moment, before my smile disappeared again. "You're the only thing keeping me going."
He stopped for a moment. "You keep me going, too."
Mount Justice
March 21, 17:41 EDT
"Forget I asked," Jaime snapped me back to reality.
"So why is this here?" Bart questioned. "I mean it's pretty and everything, but these people are heroes. In the line of duty and all that. They should have giant statues, big crashing memorials in the Hall of Justice or something."
"Yeah, I asked that too," Jaime sighed. "Captain Atom said the League doesn't want or need a public shrine to its fallen."
Tim and I still had our backs turned, looking up at Jason. "Or they just don't want to advertise that we're not immortal," I suggested.
"I thought the same thing," Jaime agreed. "The handful of regular people who've seen me in action think I'm this guy in a new costume. The world will never know about Ted Kord's sacrifice."
"But you know," Bart said. "And you're carrying on the grand Blue Beetle heroic tradition, right?"
"I wish! It's such a total rip. Superboy has Superman. Wonder Girl has Iris and Wonder Woman. Robin has Batman, Nightwing, and Batgirl. You've been in this era, like what, five minutes? And already you have three Flash mentors, one who feeds you junk food. But me? I never even got the chance to meet the guy who should have been my mentor."
"I didn't have a mentor until I came here," I reassured Jaime. "Most of what I've learned about my powers had to come naturally. Maybe it'll be the same for you."
"Heh, I hear that beautiful. You know, we have more in common than you might think," he told Jaime. "Our love of Chicken Whizees for example. Let me buy you some to replace the bag I salvaged. We'll hang. It'll be totally crash."
Bart dragged Jaime out with him. "Uh, sure."
Tim and I stayed there for another minute, watching.
"What was he like?" Tim broke our silence.
"Angry. Stubborn," I listed. "But there was also a soft side of him that he hid away."
"What about Nightwing? What was he like when he was still Robin?"
"The exact opposite," I smiled to myself, thinking back to the boy I met six years ago. "Going on missions was like a game for him. He loved it. He was understanding and caring..."
Tim had this look on his face.
"What?"
"Nothing," his head shook. "He still loves it now, though, right? Going on missions?"
It's so much more complicated than that—in about a hundred ways I'm not allowed to share, "Of course he does."
Dakota City
March 21, 18:17 CDT
"You look great," Z met me at the zeta entrance with a grin. "You have the gift?"
I waved the bag around. "Bit of an awkward trip to the mall, you know."
She laughed, but couldn't help faltering, "I-I wish she could attend."
Guiltily, I pulled her into a hug; comforting her in the way I'd done since we were kids. "Me too."
M'gann arrived behind us, her excitement still high. But even she had thoughts weighing her down, "It's Conner's birthday today. He's never had a birthday when I haven't thrown him a party."
"That's not really your job anymore, M'gann."
"And with Kaldur holding La'gaan captive, I can't focus on parties."
I kept my gaze on the floor.
"Megan, Iris, and Zatanna are here!" Karen spotted us turning the corner.
"Hi!" Raquel grinned, pulling us into large hugs. "Oh, I'm so glad you could make it, you guys!"
"Happy bridal shower, Raquel!"
She reached into the bag I handed her, quickly stopped when I grabbed her arm. "I wouldn't pull it out in public."
Her eyes widened, probably assuming about a thousand different things Zatanna and I would buy her. All I could say is Dick was very excited to see I bought it, and very disappointed to realize we couldn't use it.
Raquel opened her other gift instead. "M'gann, oh, you shouldn't have."
"Actually, it's from Artemis too. We... bought it together."
For the hundredth time today, I was swallowed with guilt. Every bad thing affecting my friends felt like my responsibility—to cause and to fix.
"What am I doing, having this shower? How can we celebrate so soon after..?"
"Because Artemis would want us to celebrate," I blurted, forcing a smile.
"She'd kick our butts if we didn't," Z agreed.
Raquel raised her glass, "To absent friends."
I wished this portion of the night would end sooner. "To absent friends," they repeated.
"And to the bride!' M'gann said.
"To the bride!"
"You're getting married, girl!"
"I know!" Raquel squealed unable to believe it herself.
The excited conversation continued, everyone catching up for the first time in a while. "So, Zatanna how are you and Gregg?" Raquel brought up.
"Good," she answered brightly. "It's been four months now, and I really like him."
"Karen, what about you and Mal?" Cassie asked.
"We're still together," she laughed. "Not much else to say about it."
"What I know all of us have been waiting to hear about is Miss Iris and her old-new boo," Raquel grinned mischievously.
Naturally everyone's eyes landed on me. "I-I don't have a—"
"You expect us to believe there's nothing going on with you and Nightwing?" Karen accused.
"Heh, I don't think this is the place to—"
"Oh come on! We went on one date and I'm getting married now," Raquel sang, wriggling her finger again to show off the ring.
"Don't feel weird, Rena," Z soothed when our eyes locked, "Boy Wonder and I spent a year breaking up whenever we could. We were kids! It was always supposed to be you two."
"Uh..."
Zatanna didn't feel like the problem, neither did Raquel.
It was Barbara sitting right next to me.
Despite a shaky, very unspoken mutual respect, I didn't understand where we stood with one another. She and Dick have had their fair share of nights, along with a far longer shared history. But things have also been so different recently. Dick and I seemed gentler, happier.
For the first time, I was actually beginning to believe we had a chance.
But I couldn't outright say so, "I don't know. We're not—"
"Living together again?" M'gann cut me off.
I kept my mouth from falling open. How could I assume it wouldn't be a proper reunion without me getting called out?
"We're roommates," I said innocently. "And co-leaders and—"
I was cut off again, this time by Z, "Long time lovers?"
"Seriously, Rena," Raquel pleaded.
"We're... fine," I let out. "W-we're good."
"Look at you!" Z gushed.
"She can't even hide her smiling!" Karen added.
I had to cover my face with my hands, because they were right. I couldn't control my smiling like an idiot.
"And you've been lying this whole time saying you're vegetarian."
My hands flew from my face, immediately scolding "Raquel!"
The table's fit of giggling was cut off by a bang coming from across the street. Soon after a wall of ice began to surround us.
Zatanna muttered an incantation changing all of our clothes into uniforms as Cassie and I took a swing at the ice, shattering the wall completely.
The ice villain on the other side dropped his pick in shock. "I'm completely doomed, aren't I?"
"One hundred percent."