Chatper 74
2,756 words
QUESTION OF THE CHAPTER: Are you one of those people that fangirl more when the characters do small acts of intimacy (like one of them purposely brushing their hand against the other's, first kiss, pull a strand of the other's hair behind their ear, light kisses on the cheek) rather than the 'big ones'?
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"Technical Analyst Agent Blair speaking"
"Why so formal, sweet-cheeks?"
"Shall I remind you that I have an FBI nanny who's watching me every second of my work-life, girl scout? If I did what you and Penelope did, I'd have my head- not only because it would be considered inappropriate and I'd get called out, but because your girlfriend would kill me for apparently trying to steal her man"
"My bad" the man laughed from the other side of the line "Hey, we need some information on a couple of teenagers... uh... Cameron and Sam Philips. They went to high school with the victim... send over everything you can find"
"What I can legally find or what I can not-so-legally find?"
"Legally" the guy sitting close to Thaleia glared at her from over the newspaper he was reading.
"You're no fun" she stuck her tongue out to him "Sorry Morgan, you'll get the boring version of everything"
"Cheer up, sweet-cheeks. It's not gonna be forever"
"Your forever and mine are quite different" she sighed.
"Have you spoken to our pretty-boy yet?"
"I don't see how that's related to the case" she narrowed her eyes, as if the man could see her from the other side of the country "Mind your business, you fucking gossip chick"
With a last laugh, Derek hung up the phone, and Thaleia got to work. Finding information about those two kids was easy for her. She had managed to convince her 'nanny' to bring some of her equipment- sure, Garcia's was great and worked really well, but the girl had a different level of hacking experience and had created some programs that worked better and faster. Unfortunately, they didn't fit the FBI standards, so that last part about 'special' programs wasn't shared with Hansen, the 'nanny'.
It had only been four days since their new assignments, but it already felt like forever to all of them. To some more than to others.
Apparently, Hansen had been told to not let the girl do anything that wasn't related to work, which included drawing random things on papers laying around when she had finished her tasks. That was hell. She also couldn't pick up any calls that weren't coming to the FBI line, and if Hansen suspected that it was a relatively personal call, he'd end it and report it. Those 'reports' meant that she would face a punishment of some sort if she got too many. So far she had gotten one when he caught her talking to Penelope. It was kind of worth it.
"May I get up and go grab a hot choco?" she turned her chair slowly to avoid getting dizzy. That was a weakness of hers she hated so much. It was annoying.
"Get me a coffee too"
"I'm not a waitress, much less yours"
"That's the only way you're getting out of here" he wasn't even looking at her as he gave her orders. He never did. She flipped him off before leaving the room and walked down the hall to the small kitchen the bullpen had, ready to make herself her favourite drink.
"Oh" she looked up when the voice interrupted her daydreaming while waiting for the coffee machine to heat up.
"Oh- uh... hi" she awkwardly waved at the Doctor "How are the uh... the trainees?"
"They're okay" Spencer replied changing the weight of his body from one foot to another.
Things had been a bit uncomfortable after the day of the trial.
On one hand, Thaleia still had to pinch herself every morning when remembering what her colleague had said before they entered the court room. She also spent the night overthinking- what did he really mean when he said that? Did he only say them to make me less nervous? What about the kiss? Does he know how I feel about him and is toying me around?
Then there was Spencer, who blushed at the memory of how soft her skin had felt against his lips and got angry at himself the next second- had that kiss on the cheek been too much? Has she even thought about what I said to her? It was so cheesy! Maybe she has thought about it and doesn't like me as much as I thought she did.
"I uh... I didn't know you switched to coffee" he said after a minute of uncomfortable silence between the two.
"Oh, I haven't... this is for my nanny- for Hansen, my supervisor"
"Oh, okay. I thought it was weird so..."
"Yeah..." they fell into silence again.
"Hey, Thaleia"
"Yes?"
"I think... I feel like... uh" he chuckled. The words weren't coming out- he had never felt so nervous around anyone before, not even around JJ around the time he developed a silly crush on her "Maybe you could come to my place? After work?" Thaleia was about to make up an excuse when he cut her off "I think it would be smart of us to talk- about the other day..."
"Uh..." the girl scratched the back of her ear "Maybe another time?"
"No" he replied almost immediately, taking her by surprise "I mean..." he took a deep breath "I want to set things straight... make sure that you know and I know and that we're both in the same page about what's going on" he gestured with his hands between the two of them "Please?"
The youngest sighed, not being able to say 'no' to him "Okay" he smiled slightly "I'll be there when I'm done here-"
"I'll wait" he said before she could finish the sentence.
"It's alright, I drove here anyway"
"I took the train"
Thaleia chuckled at the boy's attempt to get her to agree "Okay... uh... I don't really know when I'll be done- Emily said they thought they were close to getting the Unsub but you never know"
"I'll wait, don't worry- it's not like I have anything to do other than be with you"
"Oh- uh... yeah, okay" she took the two cups, wanting to leave as soon as possible the boy's presence. He was making her nervous "I'll see you later, then"
"Yeah" Spencer felt like approaching her and giving her a kiss on the cheek, wanting to feel again her skin, but held himself back. It wasn't the right time. And he wanted them to talk.
We'll see how it goes...
[...]
"So you guys are on your way back?" Spencer asked over the phone to his best friend.
"Yeah" Morgan sounded tired "Someone remind me not to chase an Unsub that runs track and races for fun"
"It couldn't have been that bad" the boy teased his friend.
"Next time we encounter one of those, you get him then"
"No thank you" he laughed.
"Have you seen Thaleia?"
"Why, did she tell you something?" he asked instantly.
The older laughed at his enthusiasm "Dude, you're such a boy in love" he kept laughing "When I called her earlier about the case I asked if you two had spoken, but she refused to answer" Reid stayed silent "So? Have you?"
"Ye-yeah, I saw her earlier"
"And?" the boy didn't want to answer, and as if the gods had heard him, just then the girl they were talking about walked out of the room she had spent the day in.
"And I'll tell you another time- I have to go" without listening to what the man was about to say, he hung up and grabbed his bag, making his way to the bullpen's glass doors to meet her halfway "Hey"
"Oh, hi" he had scared her, that much was obvious by how hard she had clenched her bag "Didn't think you'd still be here... it's pretty late"
"Well, I told you I'd wait"
"Yeah, you did but... never mind. Let's go then" Spencer followed behind, letting her guide the way to the lift and then, once in the parking level, to her car. It had been a while since he saw the vehicle, and when he did, he couldn't help but remember the small road trip they did to Charlottesville to spend the day with the foster-home kids, as well as all the costumes.
How had he not realised then, that maybe she liked him as well? She made the costumes, and she made theirs matching.
"Is it okay if we go to your place?" Thaleia asked a few minutes after she started driving "Mine is kind of a mess"
"It's always a mess" he teased.
"Well" the girl laughed "More than usual... I may or may not have made use of my 'break here' wall and there are pieces of glass, ceramics and other stuff all over the floor"
"How do your neighbours not call the police every now and then?"
"I put a sign on my door"
"And that works?"
"Nope" they laughed "I give them a call when I remember. If I don't, they usually come over and that's when they see the sign... it's a good thing I'm the only one who knows where I keep it- just imagine if one of the psychos that are after me got in and killed me while that was on the door" she shrugged "How long do you think would take for my neighbours to realise something happened?"
"Maybe the lady that lives in front of you would see the sign and not hear anything from the other side... then she'd be worried"
"What if the person who killed me took it down?"
"Huh... then Penelope or I would realise" he looked at the side of her face as she drove "If either of us doesn't manage to talk to you or doesn't see you when we should, we'd definitely go over"
"So... about twenty four hours, then? Maybe twelve?"
"It would take me less than five minutes to notice you're not where I am" Thaleia stole a quick glance his way before facing the road again, wanting to avoid her crush from seeing the blush on her cheeks.
About half an hour after that short talk, the girl had parked the car and she was following Spencer as he unlocked the door from his building and, after climbing up the stairs, the door to his apartment.
There was a tension then that hadn't been there the other times she had been at his place. And it was a thick one.
"Would you uh... would you like to order something for dinner first?"
"Oh, I uh... I'm okay... I'm not really hungry" she set down her bag before taking off her shoes "But if you are-"
"I'm good as well" he cleared his throat.
Yeah, definitely awkward.
Reid cleared his throat once again before moving over to the sofa, motioning for the girl to take a seat with him as well. He waited until she was next to him and then, they sat down. As always Thaleia brought her legs up, but not like when she was upset -in which she brought the knees to her chest-, more like just to be more comfortable. And he was happy to see that, even in the situation they were currently in, she felt safe enough to get comfortable.
"I just... I uh..."
"I love these kind of talks" she joked when the boy wasn't able to formulate a sentence.
He laughed for a moment, turning to look at her as he did so to see her smiling at him as well "I'm just not sure how to... well, talk about this" he reached out his hand and placed it on the couch facing up, offering it to her if she wanted to take it. And when she did after a few seconds, his heart fluttered.
"Me neither" she laced their fingers in an attempt to confirm if he, by any chance, felt the way she did. Her heart skipped a beat when he, rather than pulling away, squeezed her hand and brought his other one in to caress the top of hers.
"You never had this kind of talk with Oliver?"
I didn't feel for Oliver what I feel for you, she wanted to tell him. But how could she? There was still so much doubt in her about what he thought of her.
"Not really... it was a one-way kind of thing with him, so..."
"Oh, I thought you..."
"No, I didn't... he's a great guy, and quite handsome but... not a boy I want a relationship with"
"Was he not a boy you wanted to date or... the boy you wanted to date?" he asked, avoiding her eyes first but then looking up, meeting her flushed features.
"I-" she opened and closed her mouth like a fish out of the water.
"Thaleia... remember when you asked me why I didn't have a girlfriend? At the café that night?"
"When the waitress gave you her number? Yeah, I remember" she joked to try and lighten up the atmosphere. But there was too much tension to be lifted up by just a simple joke.
"When I told you that I was waiting for the one" he didn't want to wait. He didn't want to make that situation any longer. He wanted to confess, once again, how he felt towards her and he wanted her to finally tell him that she felt the same.
"Yeah, you did say that" she then realised that she too, had been caressing the boy's hand with her fingers. And she didn't really want to stop "And..." she started "do you remember when I was taken?"
"How could I forget?" he frowned looking down "I should have looked for you sooner"
"Not what I wanted to talk about" she cut him off "I told you that I remembered few things about it, that it was all blurry since the day I was taken but-" she took a deep breath, turning her head to the side "I remember all of it... well- not all of it. The day I was kidnapped feels like a dream rather than a memory. But I remember everything else" she sighed "Everything he did to them, how many times he stuck a needle in me to keep me awake, the stuff he used to torture us..."
"You don't have to talk about this now-"
"I remember the hallucinations" she looked up at him "I remember when you came and just stood there, looking at me and telling me how much you hated me, how I had used all of you, that I didn't care about you guys, that it was all my fault, that I was never meant to exist-" she swallowed down the knot in her throat "And then you were holding me" she smiled lightly "You were saying so many things- I didn't catch them all but I remember thinking they made me feel funny inside... and I remember you saying that you didn't want me to leave and that you-" she cut herself before saying anything else.
She still thought that there was a chance that she had imagined all of that- that it had all been part of a hallucination and she could be making a fool of herself.
"That I love you" he finished for her "That I'm nothing without you"
Thaleia looked up, and their eyes met. It was like those cliché movies that the girl hated so much- when time stopped around them and there was nothing else that mattered in the world; when it felt like their hearts had synchronised... when it was only the two of them.
"I love you, Thaleia Blair" he said once again "Penelope showed me my old notebook- the one you used to write to me on... and-" he took a deep breath, his hopes up because the girl in front of him hadn't flinched away or reacted at the confession of having read her diary "If you... if what you wrote there is still true, after everything I've done to you... I-"
"Kiss me" she interrupted him.
"What?" he couldn't believe what he was hearing.
"Kiss me" she repeated "Kiss me until the sun dries up... kiss me like I'm the answer to all of your doubts... kiss me until the moon stops rotating around earth... kiss me until the only thing I'll ever remember is how your lips felt against mine... kiss me until the only name I will ever taste is yours... kiss me like it's your antidote" they inched closer and closer.
"Kiss me, Spencer Reid"
And he did.
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Fucking Finally!
August 10th 2021, almost 9 months after I started planning and writing this story, I have finally gotten them to kiss.
That was fun!
But fuck what I made Thaleia say in that last bit is so cringe and cheesy I wanna scoop my eyes out and crush them :")