Schizophrenia cannot be understood without understanding despair.
-
As soon as Vic was tranquil, Kellin helped him up and drove him back to the hospital as fast as he could. He was, in the end, worried. Panic attacks aren't something you should leave be, especially with someone who already has another problem in their hands.
Once Kellin and Vic were back inside, Kellin said goodbye to Vic who was escorted by a worker back down the wing where his room was located. With a sigh, Kellin went back up to the desk, greeted by the same lady who was there before they left.
"He had a panic attack at the movie theater. I didn't really know what to do, but I got him to calm down and... I just don't think it's normal for him to have all these things happening to him. Is it a side effect from his medication?" Kellin questioned anxiously, looking back at the workers concerned expression.
"Well, actually... Mr. Fuentes isn't on medication..." She replied meekly. Kellin raised his eyebrows in confusion.
"But, schizophrenia is a serious illness, you can't just leave him without medication." Kellin explained.
"His parents haven't signed the papers for us to prescribe him any sort of medication."
"Well, they need to, do you have their numbers by chance?"
"I can't give out their numbers." Kellin huffed in annoyance. Of course they couldn't. "But their number is in the phone book." The nurse added on.
"It's fine, my mom has their number." Kellin replied before hurrying out the front doors to his car. He drove home as fast as he could, trying to think of exactly what he wanted to say to Vic's parents. The situation was really awkward, because Kellin doesn't like to interfere in strangers' lives, but after seeing what Vic went through at the movies, he knew he couldn't leave everything be as it is right now.
When Kellin was home, he didn't hesitate to barge into his mom's office. Initially she was startled because she thought she was home alone and Kellin didn't present a subtle entry.
"I need Mrs. Fuentes's phone number." Kellin said, getting straight to the point.
"Can I ask why?"
"I just need to talk to her, now." Kellin replied hastily, sighing when his mom pulled out a piece of paper and wrote down her number before handing it to him. "Thank you." Kellin breathed, taking the paper from his mom before walking out on the porch. It's pretty obvious that Kellin was anxious about calling a complete stranger, but like stated before, he couldn't afford to not call either.
"Hello?" A lady picked up on the other side of the line. Her voice was raspy, kind of like Vic's was, though she was a little softer at the same time.
"Hi, is this Mrs. Fuentes?" Kellin went with since he didn't know her first name.
"...Yes, who's this?"
"My name's Kellin Quinn, my mom talked to you about visiting your son Vic?" Kellin explained, hoping the last name would ring a bell.
"Oh, yeah I remember. Is something wrong?"
"Well, yeah. Vic had a panic attack at the theaters early today. I helped him calm down, but then I found out he's not on medication..."
"Vic doesn't need a prescription." Mrs. Fuentes testified.
"Actually he does. Schizophrenia just gets worse with age without medication. Do you realize he doesn't know what's real and what isn't anymore? He thinks I'm a hallucination, Mrs. Fuentes." Kellin spoke harshly, but at the same time calmly. He was conflicted with how he wanted to speak.
"I'm sorry, but I'm not giving my son harmful medication."
"It's not harmful, what's harmful is your son freaking out and wanting to kill himself." Kellin blurted out. He shouldn't have said that. Kellin had no clue if Vic wanted to die or not, but he was right. Vic did want to die.
Vic wouldn't want to take medication either because he thinks he's normal, but he's not. Vic is far from normal.
"He wants to kill himself?" Mrs. Fuentes whispered into the phone. Kellin felt apologetic for saying something on which he had no right to know about.
"I shouldn't have said that, I don't know if he does. I'm just saying, it could get to a point like that or much worse if you leave him unattended." Kellin explained calmly, hoping he didn't upset her too much.
"...Okay, I'll get ahold of the doctors sometime this week." Mrs. Fuentes agreed, finally coming to her senses. Kellin smiled slyly.
"Thank you."
"No, thank you." She replied before Kellin heard the dial tone and hung up as well. With an accomplished smile, Kellin returned to the office and placed Mrs. Fuentes's number on the desk before hurrying into his room.
Kellin sat in his room for quite a while, just thinking everything through. He knew Vic was going to object to taking any sort of medicine. Curiosity got the best of Kellin and he had found himself learning more and more about schizophrenia. It was interesting to learn about the disorder, but it also hurt Kellin to learn what Vic's going through. For once, Kellin felt empathy. He actually was starting to care for someone else.
"Kellin, your dad wants to talk to you!" Kellin's mom yelled from the corridor. With a sigh, Kellin quit researching Schizophrenia and hurried down the stairs to the living room. His dad was by the door, taking off his coat. With a sly smile, he nodded for Kellin to follow him into the office. They took a seat beside one another before his dad began to speak.
"You need to move out." His father got to the point. Kellin huffed more to himself than anyone else.
"You've said that-"
"A million times, I know." He interrupted. "I found an apartment complex not too far from here that I'm going to rent for you. I want you to move in, get settled, and find a job."
"But-"
"No but's, you're moving in next week." His dad interrupted yet again before standing up and exiting the room, leaving Kellin all alone. He didn't want to move, and he certainly didn't want to start working. He's never worked in his entire life. Secretly, deep down inside, Kellin knew he shouldn't still be at home, and he shouldn't be unemployed. If anything, he should've gone to college.
The rest of the day dragged on for Kellin as it did for Vic who did nothing but watch TV and refuse to eat the dinner that was brought to him. Without Kellin there, everything felt like a routine. In Vic's head, nothing mattered anymore except for when Kellin appeared. He was the reason everything was different.
Kellin thought that seeing Vic so often was actually helping, and it was to a certain extent, but it was also hurting Vic. He wanted to do absolutely nothing. He didn't want to eat, sleep, or talk because it was a bad routine to him.
Kellin was the good routine.