Um so it's been another month and I can assure you I've not gotten any better
It's, in fact, got worse
So after we moved my grandma in and I hurt my wrist, which has thankfully gotten better, we had some chill time and I hopped on that train as fast as possible thinking "hey nothing can go wrong for a while, right"
Ahahahahahahahahahahahha
I hate it here
My other grandpa had heart surgery on the 21st of July
He had a 92% chance of living so my parents decided that y'know it's really not something they needed to tell us and worry us with because he's gonna live
Yeah...
He fell into the 8%
On the 22nd of July
It's weird
In August we usually go to our cabin with him my grandma my cousin and uncle and I was really looking forward to it
I even imagined seeing him before we got that news
I was like "hey now that all these horrible things happened to me I can finally see my grandparents again after a year and a half and have fun with them again"
Y'all idk what to do
My heart really hurts and I miss him so much
At least I was able to go to his funeral this time
I got to say goodbye in person finally
It was also a weird thing
We had pictures of him right across where he laid and seeing them have more life then the real world him was strange
In some way I kind of expected him to roll over and smile at me and call me like he used to
It was the first time I've seen my older brother and dad cry so hard too
Anyway
That's what's happened with me
I know I said I'll try to update soon but honestly I really cant right now
I am going to hang out with friends and family and try my best to get used to this change and get into a better head space
I'm going to do things that'll make me more happy but I know it'll take a while
I know this book is supposed to be happy and good and cheer people up but rn I need time to do that for myself so I hope you guys can hold on for updates a bit longer and idk when I'll be back
Thank you guys for being patient
Love you all