"Ouch!"
At some point, Kie and I had flipped onto our stomachs, letting the rays of sun soak into any patches of exposed skin. I was rather comfortable until a small plastic bag of potato chips the back of my head. My eyes flew open and I twisted to look over my shoulder where Pope and JJ were strolling back down to us, the latter with an innocent-enough looking grin and a finger pointed accusingly to the boy next to him. I rolled my eyes and sat up, retrieving the chips from the deck and pulling it open.
"What's up chicas?"JJ greeted as they approached, reaching his fingers towards my food. I promptly smacked his hand and he scrunched up his nose with a childish look of hurt.
Kie sat up as well, taking the trail mix Pope offered nicely with an outstretched hand and replied, "What took you guys so long?"
"JJ almost got caught stealing a six-pack," Pope answered, flashing him an irritated glare.
JJ merely waved us off and responded through a mouthful of chips, "Good thing Pope's such a good distraction."
My eyebrows raised when I looked back to Pope but he just sighed and shrugged his shoulders in defeat. I bit back a smirk, trying to emphasize my disapproval, but internally thinking how adorable it was when he tossed morals to the side when it came to the four of us.
"That was stupid," Kie commented dryly, "You're only out on bail so let's not push it with the criminal activity please."
"Yeah, yeah, yeah," JJ brushed her off, standing up and offering her a hand, "Do you want one or not?"
She lifted the bottle from her side and, upon seeing the minimal traces of liquid circle around on the bottom, shrugged and wiped the dirt from her butt, taking his hand and following him back to the house. JJ twisted to walk backwards a couple steps, pointing at Pope and I in turn with a questioning expression. When both of us shook our heads, he jogged to catch up with Kie which left the two of us alone.
Pope briefly looked over his shoulder at their retreating figures. "How is she?"
I glanced behind me as well, watching the two of them laughing probably at some dumb, distracting joke that JJ just told. "Not great, but she'll be all right," I answered, turning back around and popping the last potato chip in my mouth before licking the salt from my fingertips. His dark inquisitive eyes stared me down for a minute before returning with a follow-up question.
"And you?"
A loaded question that could only be answered with a loaded reply. A lot of things were floating around my brain these days: DCS, my brother, murders-at-sea, newly discovered feelings for persons unnamed. But it had all begun to blend together, a distant hum at the back of my mind. I didn't feel like explaining all of this so I went the deflection route. "What's with the interview Dr. Phil?" I responded sarcastically, taking a long swig of soda.
He rolled his eyes, unperturbed by my normal defenses. "Well you've seemed better as of late," he commented.
My brow knit together. "I'm not sure how I'm supposed to take that."
"It's not a bad thing. You don't seem as stressed as you have been the past few days," he vaguely explained. I shrugged, going back to staring out over the marshlands. The corners of his mouth tilted upwards in a small hint of a smirk a few seconds later and he casually adjusted the ball cap on his head, adding at a mumble, "Amazing what a good night's sleep will do."
"Pope!" I exclaimed in exasperation after he erupted into a fit of laughter in response to my glaring expression. "Would you stop with that, it wasn't a big deal!"
"I know," he chuckled, holding out his palms in surrender when I continued to stare him down despite the pink tinge rising up my neck, "It's just funny, that's all."
"What's funny?" I demanded defensively.
Pope and I have historically been academically competitive. He gets this arrogantly smug look on his face when he knows that he knows something I don't; I loathed that look. It was the same one he gave me now, irritating me further. "The way you two pinheads act whenever I bring it up," he bluntly replied, "You're right, it isn't a big deal. We crash in each other's rooms all the time so I wouldn't have thought anything of it except for the fact that JJ turned into a tomato-red babbling moron when I asked him about it this morning."
I couldn't help my tentative curiosity, thinking back to our one-on-one foray through the Crain property today. "He did?"
"Sure, happens every time you get brought up in suggestive conversation," he answered matter-of-factly, breezing past it before I had time to fully absorb that notion, "and now you're getting all flustered-"
"I'm not flustered..." I mumbled, desperately trying to pray away the last vestiges of blush from my skin.
"-which would only lead me to confirm my original hypothesis."
"Which would be?"
He scoffed lightly. "That you two are totally into each other but are both too emotionally illiterate to admit it to the other one."
"Okay, ouch," I muttered.
"Well am I wrong?"
"I..." I faltered, again. "It's complicated," I finished lamely.
"Complicated," he repeated with a snort, "It's really not. You either wanna mack on each other or you don't."
"Pope, he's one of my best friends," I said, almost like I was trying to talk myself out of it, "And there's the rule-"
"What, no Pogue-on-Pogue macking?" he interrupted with a laugh. "You mean the rule we came up with when we were eleven and still thought the opposite sex had cooties? Try again."
"Fine, so you're telling me everyone would be just peachy if JJ and I started going out?" I demanded.
"It'd be a little weird at first sure," he admitted, remaining stupidly calm while I only grew more uncomfortable, "but as long as you guys were happy and upfront about it, then we'd get over it."
I was running out of excuses and he knew it too because he let me stew over that answer without saying anything else, letting the soft sounds of the water fill the silence. "What if it ruins everything?" I finally asked, my voice coming out small and vulnerable. Scared. I hated that. "What if I tell him and he doesn't feel that way? What if I'm misreading everything? Then what?"
"First of all, I think you should give JJ a bit more credit than that," he replied, "He may be an idiot most of the time but we are talking about the same person who took a thirty thousand dollar bath for me. He wouldn't just abandon you for something as trivial as that. And second of all...for what it's worth, I don't think you're misreading things."
"How do you know that?" I questioned desperately, finding myself hungering for an actual answer. I needed something concrete, something solid. Something that I didn't need a psychology degree for in order to dissect and understand.
"I guess I don't know exactly-" he admitted, quickly continuing when I rolled my eyes in annoyance, "-but there's all these little things. Like that stupid blanket, you know, the one he got you for your birthday like two years ago?"
I shrugged. "Sure. What about it?"
"You thought you forgot to pack it in the move but you didn't. He snuck it out of your suitcase right before you left."
"Why would he do that?" I questioned, confused by the thought. "He knows it's my favorite."
Pope rolled his shoulders and looked over at me. "I don't know, but I know it didn't leave his bed the whole time you were gone. He really missed you...probably more than the rest of us did."
What was I supposed to say to that? Also, why was everyone waiting until right now to express their suspicions about the nature of JJ and I's relationship? Vague, insinuating conversations and interactions with Pope, Kiara, John B, and even Rosie began to muddy together in my mind. It was mildly overwhelming. You two seem close...Are you and JJ macking? I think he wants to...That boy has eyes for you...
"Meg look," Pope interrupted through my racing thoughts, "I know all of this freaks you out and trust me, I get it-"
I took pause, brow scrunching slightly as I tried to interpret what that was in reference to. That is, until I noticed his eyes flicker subconsciously up to the house where Kiara and JJ had just disappeared and the lightbulb flipped on above me head. Kiara. Seems as though I wasn't the only one harboring a secret flame for someone I probably shouldn't be.
"-but so long as we're playing the what-if game, what if he does feel the same way?" Pope continued. "You were right earlier, you guys are best friends. So I think you owe it to one another to at least have the conversation."
Arguments won with logic were hard to ignore, a fact of which I was quickly learning. I took a deep breath, allowing a small smile of surrender to rise on my lips. "I hate when you're right," I said, nudging his shoulder with mine, "It's annoying."
He returned the gesture and took a fake bow. "I do what I can."
We both chuckled, the discussion shelved for the time being, which was perfect timing because at that moment, the sound of shoes crunching on gravel had both our heads swiveling towards the direction of the noise. It was John B and, judging by the long sheet of dirty blonde hair and the hand clasped around his, I had a sneaking suspicion of who was with him. Pope came to the same conclusion and without words, I grabbed my soda and stood up with him to walk briskly to the porch where the pair had taken a seat on the outside sofa. JJ was already with them, sitting on the armchair opposite us as his fingers tapped rhythmically on the neck of his beer bottle. He seemed mildly amused by the whole situation.
"Hey," John B greeted shortly as we approached. Pope settled on a random stool next to JJ but I chose to remain standing.
"Hi..." I said cautiously, gaze moving between the pair of them slowly. Sarah merely held my stare cooly but the defensive way she had tucked herself against the arm of the couch next to John B revealed how uncomfortable she was with her present circumstances. However, I wasn't really interested in her, instead choosing to silently question John B's ill-advised decision to bring her here with a pointed look. He didn't offer up an explanation and only stared me down as if daring me to ask about it. I didn't get the chance to because the sound of shoes approaching from inside and then Kie's affronted voice had me cringing, knowing what was soon to follow.
"No effin' way!" she shouted, stalking across the space to stop directly in front of them. "You brought her here? So what? She's in on this now?" JJ got up and tugged gently on my wrist, effectively moving me from Kie's war path to sit on the arm of his chair where I balanced with my knees pulled up to my chest.
"Should probably stay out of the way Sunshine," he murmured under his breath. I know he meant it as a joke, but with the steely look in Kie's normally soft eyes, I wasn't exactly disagreeing with him. John B seemed to lose some of his resolve in the face of her unabashed anger and he looked over at the three of us for help.
Pope shrugged quickly and JJ said nonchalantly, "Look, all I care about is her cut comes out of your share."
"You know, I don't remember taking a vote! This is our thing, a Pogue thing!" Kie argued, chosing her words with purpose while effectively alienating Sarah from the rest of us. I watched her pull her bottom lip into her mouth as she glared at Kie with a venom.
"I gotta say, I'm just a tad uncomfortable with all of this," Pope chimed in.
"Thank you!" Kie agreed and John B scoffed.
"When are you not uncomfortable?"
"I dunno, I rode here on the back of JJ's bike, pretty comfortably!"
JJ was staring off at a spot on the floor and he concurred, "It's true. Most relaxed I've ever seen him."
John B rolled his eyes at their ridiculousness. "That's cute guys."
"What about you, Sunshine? Are you comfortable?" JJ asked cheekily, knowing how much I probably wouldn't want to pulled into this. To answer his question, I wasn't, but it had very little to do with Sarah and more to do with his proximity to me in that moment. The way his fingers kept absentmindedly playing with the friendship bracelets wrapped around my ankle made the butterflies in my stomach take flight. I held out two palms in front of me.
"Switzerland," I said, proclaiming my neutrality. Kie's hardened expression made me backtrack slightly though. "But it is a little uncomfortable."
Kie talked over John B's incredulous snort. "You know we were all extremely comfortable until you brought her."
For the first time, Sarah spoke up when her animosity towards Kiara finally bubbled over. "Stop talking about me like I'm not here!"
"Then leave!" Kie spat and Sarah huffed, turning away from us to look at the boy sitting next to her.
"I told you," she said quietly, but clearly loud enough for us all to hear.
"Told him what exactly?" Kie yelled. "That you're a liar?"
"No, that you're a shit-talking bitch!"
I almost sprayed the quick drink of Pepsi I had taken all over my lap in surprise while the two boys next to me muttered between themselves. "Oh shit."
"My money's on Kie," JJ whispered, pulling a couple bills from his pocket, and handing them off to Pope. Kie and Sarah erupted uncontrollably into a one-on-one arguement, each trying to raise their voice over the other until the porch was filled with unintelligible bickering.
"Everybody shut up!"
John B's yell was loud enough to cut over all the noise, and both girls ceased their shouting at once, albeit rather reluctantly. "Kie, you are my best friend, right?" he said, voice returning to a normal pitch and she shrugged. He twisted to look down at Sarah with a certain admiration I hadn't seen on him before. "And Sarah, you're...you're my..."
She gave a small smile and whispered, "Say it."
"You're my girlfriend."
"Oh, that's new," Pope muttered and I raised a mildly suprised eyebrow. We had all teased him about it but up until now, he hadn't ever admitted it out loud. The confession held a bit more weight when it came from his mouth.
"She's your girlfriend now?" Kie asked sarcastically as Sarah turned back to look at her with a triumphant expression. "What was all that talk about you were just using her for information? Get a map, cut her loose."
"Kie," I said gently, watching Sarah's face waver instantly. Sure, we weren't best buds at this point, but no one should ever have to feel used, in any sense of the word.
"You said you were using me?" she asked John B quietly, who stared defeatedly at the ground with his fingers against his forehead.
"No-" he started to say but Pope and JJ didn't give him much of chance to lie.
"Yeah, you did."
"You said those things."
"Look, love just walked in okay?" John B exclaimed, obviously trying to salvage what remained of his relationship with both parties.
Kie rolled her eyes. "Oh, vomit."
"I didn't expect it. It just...it kind of happened. And I'm not gonna deny it? Right?" he continued, looking at Sarah who still wasn't wholly convinced, as evidenced by the arms crossed over her chest and irritated scowl.
"Oh, that's corny," Pope whispered and JJ snorted, trying to cover his laughter. I nudged on his shoulder and gave Pope a not now glare over JJ's head, silently telling them to shut up. Kiara's face twitched and I could tell she was minutes away from popping off again.
"Look, cut the bullshit John B," she deadpanned, leaning back against the railing, "If she's in, I'm out."
I had been waiting all afternoon for this ultimatum and I wasn't even suprised when he came back with, "I'm not doing this. I can't-"
"You are gonna decide!" Kie cried, beginning to lose her cool again. "I'm very interested actually! Me or her?"
"Both," he stated simply and I couldn't help but shake my head with a small sigh.
JJ whistled, echoing my sentiment and commenting dryly, "Went for the Hail Mary."
Kiara's bottom lip quivered as her and John B stared each other down before she turned on her heel without another word, stalking down into the yard with purpose. I winced with sympathy; I know that's not the answer she wanted to hear, even though it was the one we all knew she would get. Sarah spoke up again, clearly just as miffed but trying to keep it together in front of the rest of us.
"It'll be cool right?" she said ironically, shaking her head and standing up to walk out as well. "I'm gonna leave...gonna let y'all chat. Let me know."
Despite John B's pleas, she walked around the corner without a second glance and I listened to the sound of her bike tires fade down the drive. John B leaned his head back against the outside wall of the Chateau and closed his eyes dejectedly.
JJ stood up, patting my leg before clasping both hands in front of his and concluding sarcastically, "I'd just like to say, you handled that beautifully."
"JJ," I chided, uncurling myself from the armrest and setting my now empty soda bottle down on the ground before addressing John B with a rigid tone, "Fix this. You were right, she is your best friend. She didn't deserve any of that."
Instead of answering me, he got up and stomped back inside without another word, letting the harsh slam of the screen door signal the end of this particular conversation. Pope stood up as well, hesitating for only a moment before making up his mind and following Kie's path she took back to the far end of the dock which left JJ and I alone.
"Should we uh..." he asked, gesturing towards where Pope and Kiara sat next to each other in the distance.
I shook my head, keeping my gaze locked on their silhouettes against the dusky color of the sky. "No, he's got this. Trust me."
"Great, so we're stuck with the other one," he replied, jerking a thumb towards inside.
"Actually," I corrected, checking my phone when the setting sun reminded me how late it was getting, "you're stuck with the other one. I've got to go to work."
"Oo fun," he said dryly, watching me gather the rest of my things into the bag I had discarded on the porch when we arrived. "I can drive you over if you want."
I rejected the offer with a shake of my head, standing up straight again after glancing around one last time to make sure I had everything. "It's okay, I like the walk."
"I'll pick you up then? It'll be dark by the time you're done."
He said it like a question but phrased it more like a statement of fact. I nibbled at my bottom lip; I didn't trust myself to be alone with him anymore, especially when Pope's words from earlier still swam about in my mind. "JJ, really it's fine. You don't need to make a special trip. Besides, Rosie can drive me home if it's that important."
That seemed to satisfy him for now because he just gave a nod and didn't insist any further. Before I left, he glanced back at the door and rubbed the back of his neck with one hand. I tried not to stare too long at the muscled ridges exposed by the sides of his cut off tank when his arms raised. "What am I supposed to say to him?" he asked, thankfully not noticing the blush on my face. I need to get out of here, like now.
"I don't know, you'll figure something out," I said quickly, shaking my head and trying it refocus as I turned to leave. He only muttered a goodbye when a tiny Pope appeared on my shoulder, insisting I turn back around.
I think you owe it to one another to at least have the conversation.
"JJ!" I called out before I could talk myself out of it, whirling back around and stopping him right as his fingers brushed the door handle. He walked back over to lean against the porch railing, peering down at my smaller form standing in the grass and exaggerating the height difference between us.
"Yeah?"
"Uh..." I froze. It was rather apparent I hadn't thought any of this through and now I was stuck racking my brain for something intelligent to say. "Pebbles is uh, getting released tomorrow." Not what I was looking for but let's see where this goes.
I mentally slapped myself when he face fell slightly and his face scrunched in mild confusion. "Okay?" he answered. "Great, glad to hear it."
"Would you want to come with?" I asked with a whisper of a plan forming. The request clearly threw him for a loop.
"Come with?"
"Yeah anybody can. We'll just take her down to the water and set her free," I rambled, the words spilling out as hastily as I could think of convincing enough reasons, "It's fun. Best part of the job."
His blue eyes sparkled with amusement, studying me for a moment. I resisted the urge to squirm under his gaze. "Why me?" he inquired finally.
Now it was my turn to be confused. "What?"
"Why me? I mean Kiara's way more into this stuff than me and she could really use the pick-me-up after today-" he started explaining. I huffed, knowing he was purposefully being difficult just to get a rise out of me. It pissed me off more because it was working. "-and you know, you and Pope could really use some more quality time together-"
"JJ!"
"What?" he laughed innocently, pretending not to understand why I very nearly stamped my foot in frustration. "I'm just saying I seem like an odd choice of company, don't you think? So there's gotta be a reason I got singled out."
"Because you're the light of my life! I would just be so honored if you would grace me with your presence!" I exclaimed sarcastically, throwing my hands up in the air with a roll of my eyes. "There, is that what you needed to hear?"
He smirked and pretended to think about it before answering with a snap of his fingers, "Yes, that was it."
"Dick," I muttered.
"I'll be there," he said, standing up straight and beginning to walk backwards towards the door whilst pointing at me, "What're we talking? Noon? One o'clock?"
It was my turn to smirk and I raised one eyebrow playfully. "We have to be there by seven."
His face fell instantly and he stopped walking. "AM?"
"Yes and we sleep in the same house so I will be waking you up," I affirmed as he groaned, "You can't get out of it."
"You're lucky I like you so much," he grumbled, the remaining hint of smile on his face giving away the fact that he wasn't as bothered as he seemed.
"Mmhm, I'll see you tonight," I replied, trying to keep my voice even and respectfully disinterested as I turned to leave. I called over my shoulder at his retreating form, "7 AM tomorrow morning, okay?"
He gave me a thumbs up and replied, "It's a date, Sunshine."
My heart fluttered even though I know he didn't mean those words in way I wanted him to. Fuck, I'm in trouble.