A/N: Double update so make sure you guys read the one before !! <3
Luke let another month go by before his mom locked him in the room with a brand new cell phone and said he wasn't allowed to leave until he spoke to Alex- the only person whose number he had memorized. It was a Sunday morning and since he got home on Friday night from work, he hadn't moved much from his bed. He even skipped on going to the store with his mom which was when she finally bought him the phone he swore he was saving up for himself.
Luke sat on the carpet, the phone laid out in front of him. He took moments to count his breaths and exhale, hoping that Alex wouldn't answer. He had been dreaming of conversations he'd have with them and the more time went by, the more hostile they were in his head. He was sure Alex would tell him they wanted nothing to do with him and hang up.
He picked up the phone and put in the number, holding his thumb over the dial button before accidentally clicking it. His heart fell through to his stomach as his ears searched for the dial tone. It never came because Alex answered immediately.
"Hello?" Alex asked. "Is this the Guzman family?" Luke was stunned for a moment, not thinking that Alex's voice alone could provide so much comfort. "Hello?"
"Hey," Luke finally said. He heard something fall on the floor. "It's Luke." He already knew that but just in case.
"Luke," Alex said. He said in a tone that made it obvious that he was repeating it to someone else in the room. Luke couldn't get his leg to stop shaking up and down. There was some movement on Alex's side before he said, "How have you been?"
"I've been good," Luke said. He had been good. Not great. But he didn't feel close enough to admit that. And it clawed out his guts. "I'm sorry," he said. He always apologized now. "For not calling sooner. I've been, busy." He was lying.
"Busy?" Alex questioned. He knew Luke was lying and although it wasn't the best situation, it somewhat made Luke feel better that Alex still knew him well enough.
"No," Luke sighed. "More like... Scared. Yeah. That's more accurate." There was silence on Alex's side and there were distant footsteps behind him that Luke could hear. He must have put him on speaker. "Is someone with you?"
"Yea-no. No. Yeah," Alex said. Something was thrown across the room. "Just Reggie. Let me put you on speaker." Alex pretended to click a button by tapping his phone with his nail so Luke would hear. It made Luke half smile.
"Hey, Reg," Luke said softly.
"Hey," Reggie said. He sounded distant. Not just from the phone, but overall. Luke had never felt so deserted.
There was another pause before Alex cleared his throat and said, "A text would've been nice." Luke almost said he barely got a phone, but there were phones everywhere. He had no excuse, really. Other than fear.
"I'm sorry. Too much happened all at once. And a lot is still happening over here. Still struggling make ends meet and stuff like that." Luke could've sworn he heard Reggie whisper something about calling to ask for money, but he ignored it just in case he was wrong. "But I got my own phone now. We'll keep more in touch now. I swear."
"Luke," Alex sighed. Luke could tell her started to pace back and forth as his steps went over the floorboards. "Julie hasn't been taking your absence very well." Her name alone was enough to set whatever was left of him on fire. Hearing something new about her and having it be that should have been enough to kill him.
All Luke could ask was, "How is she?"
"Just told you. I'll text you her number after this. You need to call her. She's just not herself without you here." Luke took in a deep breath. More muttering on the other side. Alex's voice broke, and Luke covered his mouth to stop a sob from coming out. "And neither are we. We really needed to hear from you after everything, and you just... you left us like nothing." Luke furiously rubbed his eyes as tears slipped all the way down to his neck.
"I'm so, so sorry, Alex. I just felt like you guys needed space away from me after all I did and that you guys were just going to look at me and see me as a traitor. Reggie," Luke called into the phone. "I'm sorry."
Reggie spoke into the phone, much closer with his voice strong and occasionally faltering, "Look, dude. I wish I could get mad at you. I really do because it'd be so much easier than, feeling all of this. It's just so complicated especially with you not even talking to us. We know it's not your fault. We're not mad at you. We just wanted you to stay closer to us. And you didn't."
All Luke could muster to say was, "I'm sorry."
"Me, too," Reggie whispered. There were the sounds of footsteps and a door shutting close.
Alex said into the phone, "Just give him some time. You and me are close, but you and Reggie spent almost every day together for so many years. He loves you, Luke. You just need to come around more often. Explain more of... everything."
"Yeah," Luke sighed, resting a limp hand on his face. It was hard to feel anything at all.
"I'm getting another phone call right now. I'll forward you Julie's number. Call her and call me later to tell me about it," Alex instructed him.
"Got it."
"Call," he said one more time before he hung up. Luke looked at the small phone in his hands, and it wasn't much longer before he got Julie's number in a text. He clicked on the highlighted number, his phone immediately dialing it before he got a chance to get his feelings back. Maybe it'd be easier to be numbed out.
Julie let the phone dial ring twice before she answered, "Hello? Who is this and how did you get my number?"
"Shit," Luke found himself whispered. He needed to hear her. He needed to know she was alive and safe, and there she was. Talking to him. It was enough. Enough for that moment.
"What was that?" she asked. "Hello?
Luke gathered the courage to speak, unsure of what to call her. "Princess," he finally said. It sounded awkward, like she just caught him stealing from the fridge at night.
"Luke," she whispered, almost in shock. "It's you." She sounded unhappy to hear him, and it cut through him like a dull knife.
"Before I say anything else, I'm sorry for not reaching out sooner. I've just been scared. And I'm sorry if I hurt you in any way." Julie sighed on the other line. She was very still compared to Alex and Reggie, Luke not hearing anything at all.
"I forgive you, you know," she said. "For everything. I do. I just wish." She took a pause in what she was going to say, and every second that she didn't speak, made Luke want to cry more. "You hadn't said those things to me right before I left. I think it would've been easier for me to think you never had feelings for me. Because that's what you've been showing me with your absence." So. She was going to jump straight into that.
Luke rubbed his hand on his neck, not knowing how to tell her. How to apologize for something like that. Because she was right, and he was awful.
"I wasn't lying when I said I wanted to be with you," Luke said. He looked around his room at the unfinished books he had to read for work. There was a new polaroid picture of him and his parents framed next to his bed. There was so much to lose on both sides. "Princess," he said, trying to sound as confident as he could. "Do you think it's best if we put a fold in the corner of that chapter. Maybe try to open it again later. When things are... better."
Without a beat, Julie chuckled and said, "You confuse me." Hearing her laugh did more for him than she would ever know. "But yes. I think that would be best." She was talking formal. She was like Reggie. Far, far, away. And Luke had the map in his hands, but he was blind.
"I'm sorry."
"Stop apologizing," she said firmly. "Everything has been out of our control for a while. What happened. How we're hurting and healing. I think we all just need time." Luke was not strong enough to go another minute on the phone with her anymore. He got a bullet of feelings to his neck, and if he tried to pretend for a little longer that he was strong and went into that call with intentions of breaking off his chances to one day call her his, he would not make it.
"I'll see you someday, Princess," Luke said in a quiet voice.
"Yeah," Julie told him. "Someday."
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A/N: Nah because I think this is one of the chapters that hurt me the most to write. Y'all good? I'm not.
It's so strange to think this was supposed to be the last chapter. I already planned the rest, and I know you guys are going to love them :) I think this is peak pain and after this, you guys can look forward to softness... for the most part. ANYWAYS, y'all catch my Zombies ref /.\ It's my favorite DCOM ever, and I've seen it 17 times no joke.