Porsche's POV:
"Who the hell told you?!" I shouted with ire at Techno, who was sitting at a table in the canteen with his blind followers, eating a pile of rice and chicken and sipping an iced coffee. He glanced at me, looking unbothered, and smiled brightly.
"I'll tell you just as I tell everyone. I never give away my sources," he said, almost mocking me. I wanted to just punch that fucking grin off his face, but I knew it'd cause me more problems than already created.
"Was it Kinn?" I asked. A few heads around the canteen turned upon hearing that name escape my lips. Shit. That was certainly going to create a few rumors.
Techno sighed. "I cannot confirm or deny that."
"Why not? If it isn't him then you aren't giving away your intel," I reasoned.
"Not true," Techno said. He scooped a spoonful of rice and took a large bite, smacking his lips together before continuing his response. "If I deny that it was him then it narrows down your suspects, therefore, inadvertently giving the person away."
I was so close to punching him, so fucking close. "I don't know who told you that I'm a virgin, but it's not true. So clear up your source!"
Techno laughed. And he laughed hard, like I'd told him the best joke of the century. As soon as he calmed down, he said, "I'm sorry to say that I'm confident with my source, Porsche."
I lunged forward, but his minions stood in front, blocking my way. I wasn't scared of some fucking girls, but I also didn't want to punch any of them. I was still a gentleman after all.
"Just walk away, Porsche. What's done is done," Techno said.
I growled. He was right. All I was doing was causing a scene. Feeling useless, I glared at him.
"You'll pay for this," I warned.
"I'm sure I will." Techno smirked.
I walked away and headed to my next class. As I took a seat near the front, I heard a ping from Facebook messenger. I checked to see I had a message from one of Techno's goons.
A: It wasn't Kinn.
If it wasn't Kinn, then who the hell was it? I wanted to ask more questions, but I didn't trust what they were telling me. Kinn could've asked her to lie for him. She could've said that because, like the rest of the school, she shipped us together. The only motives she had to tell me this were ones that benefited her. I couldn't trust her. I couldn't trust anyone.
***
When had I told him? I thought back to that day when I'd stupidly told Kinn that I was anyone's virginal wet dream. If I'd remembered correctly, it was the night I got drunk. The problem was that my memory of that night was so blurry, and most of what stayed in my brain was drinking and almost getting stabbed by some psychos in the street. In fact, I couldn't even remember the exact time I'd told him anything. All I remembered was that I'd told him.
If it was at the party, who could've overheard? Parties were incredibly loud, so unless someone with bionic hearing was tuning into our conversation, it would've made it nearly impossible for someone to listen in. I nixed out the idea of just shouting it. That would've been its own video.
Sitting at my desk in the back of my dorm room, I tried playing detective to my own crime scene. It was becoming apparent that I was no Sherlock Holmes, nor did I come close to being a Watson. I felt like Lestrade, the incompetent bastard.
I was such a loser. Who the hell was still a virgin as a senior in college? Honestly, between studying and training, I didn't have time to consider dating or trying to get laid. My father frowned upon drinking, so I hadn't brought home any regrettable one-night stands. And no one at school had caught my attention. Sure, there were little crushes here and there but nothing serious that I'd pursue.
But I'd kept that part of myself fairly well hidden. Phupha was convinced that I'd slept with more people than him. I had my suspicions that Phupha was a virgin too, but I didn't mention it to him. Even so, the attention I got from guys at school was enough to keep the door of possibilities open that I was getting some major action. Sadly, that wasn't the case.
Lost in my thoughts, I almost didn't notice that creaking of the door slowly opening to my room. There was only one person who had a key besides me.
I inhaled sharply, not bothering to turn around and face the bastard. "Get out."
If he knew what was good for him, he'd run away while he was still thinking. That bruise I gave him hadn't satisfied me.
"It wasn't me," Kinn said gently. The door clicked shut, redarkening the room as the hallway light was hidden. I hadn't bothered to keep any light in the room. Oddly enough, Kinn hadn't turned on a light upon his entry.
Flickering on a small lamp light on my desk, I turned around, my arm resting on the back of my chair. My gaze searched for the fuzzy, pale body standing across from me. "Is me being your bodyguard really so terrible?" I asked him flat out.
Kinn looked hesitant, like he knew what he wanted to say, but he didn't know how to say it.
"For what it's worth, I've fucked many people, and it's really not all people make it out to be," Kinn said, avoiding my question.
I would've pestered him further, but that remark made me too irritated to think. I didn't care about his past, no matter what the sting in my chest told me. I wouldn't let him get to me like this, showing off how cool he thought he was for sleeping around like some slut.
(Author's Note: Porsche, let's not slut shame, please.)
"How the fuck is that supposed to make me feel better?" I asked angrily, fists curling, waiting for the nearest target to hit.
Kinn shook his head and took a step closer. "I'm just saying...It really doesn't mean anything unless you're with someone you truly care about. So, it's nice that you've waited this long," he explained.
I rolled my eyes. I'd heard that sentiment many times before, yet society still pressured to have sex as if was more important than air or water. No one thought it sweet to be waiting. They viewed it as weak or thought there was something wrong. Plus, most people my age had at least some experience. It'd be weird to sleep with someone now when they expected at least some level of competency.
"If you really feel that way, then why do it so many times?" I asked, not really wanting to know the answer. I didn't know why I didn't want to know. I just had a feeling. It was a queasy feeling, a scary one.
Kinn chuckled. "A man still has his cravings, no matter the reward," he answered shamelessly.
I wanted to spit in his face. "You're disgusting," I hissed.
By now, Kinn was less than a meter from me, staring at me with an amused expression and hands in his pants' pockets. My heart stammered, sensitive to his proximity.
"If you're so upset about this, why don't you just have sex with someone?" Kinn suggested as if it were the most obvious solution.
"Wait, that's brilliant! Why haven't I thought of that before?" I asked sarcastically.
"Come on. You're a good looking guy. I'm sure it wouldn't be hard to find a willing participant."
Kinn's words were confusing. He was praising me for being abstinent while also encouraging me to sleep around. He was playing these confusing mind games like he had some sort of weird agenda.
"I'm good," I said.
I didn't know why I was so resistant to the idea of having sex with someone. Perhaps, after waiting for so long, I thought that it was best to keep it special. I wasn't in any rush evidently.
He licked his lips and chuckled smoothly with a shrug. "Really waiting for 'the one', huh?"
I glared at the ridiculously sappy notion. I wasn't some chick. "No."
"Then what're you waiting for?" Kinn smirked. He really knew how to get under my skin.
Irritated, I stood from my chair and stormed towards him, wanting to just punch him in the face. I paused until our faces were only centimeters apart, ready to attack him.
But the warmth radiating throughout my body chose a different feeling. The pounding in my chest heightened at the view of those pretty, almond eyes. My impulses raced in my veins, confused by the rush of adrenaline and emotions.
I squirmed awkwardly in place but didn't dare to move. Our eye contact was penetrating, like I could run inside his mind and find out his darkest secrets. Did he want to kiss me? My eyes narrowed to his lips at the thought. Fuck. He's going to notice that!
I didn't know whether I should or not. What would I say to dispel the rumor? 'Hey, everyone! It's a lie. I have had sex. With Kinn!' That would be worse than thinking I hadn't kissed at all.
Regardless of the social implications, I was yearning to grab hold of the lips now a centimeter from mine. His breath tickled my mouth, taunting me to man up and do it.
Thoughtless, I reached to grip the back of his neck and forced our lips together. He gasped, surprised I actually took the initiative, and kissed me back. I curtained my eyes as our lips began to move in sync.
I wanted to hate it, but I couldn't. Instead, I allowed him to creep his thick tongue inside my mouth and poke at mine. Swirling our tongues around, I was delighted to have met the new taste of sugar with flesh. He must've had cake earlier. Our mix of passion weakened my knees. Kinn guided our lips in such a way that I'd forgotten how inexperienced I was. Purposefully, he used his lower lip to direct mine to move with his. Our movements were quick and desperate, but it felt like time had slowed down for us.
I'd never kissed someone, but I could tell that this wasn't like most kisses. There was a heated passion that we brewed. I swung my arms around his neck, one hand traveling to the back of his head to firmly grip his soft, dark hair, soothing my palm. Kinn grabbed my waist and slammed our crotches together, solidifying just how real this moment was.
Tilting his head, Kinn's lips abandoned mine and found a new home to my cheek until he trailed down my neck. The enrapturing sensation spread throughout my body, coercing me to lean into his touch. As his hairs tickled under my chin, I sucked in his masculine scent. Kinn pressed his nose under my ear and deeply inhaled. Does he like my scent, too? Before I knew what was happening, I felt the sharp edges of teeth sinking into my skin.
I felt a hard squeeze as he cupped my ass. Overwhelmed, I pushed him away and shook my head. This didn't deter him. Kinn pulled me closer, pressing our hot bodies against each other, his hard rod against my abdomen.
This is too fast.
"Kinn..." I moaned as he sank his teeth deeper into my neck. "Stop."
Kinn groped my ass harder.
"Stop!" I shouted, shoving him away.
Kinn complied, but as he pulled back, I could see the lust in his eyes. No, it wasn't lust. It was a fond craving. The wetness of my saliva coating his upper lip highlighted my impulse, making my stomach churn in horror.
Shit. Did he give me a hickey this time?
I didn't want to look at him anymore. This was entirely overwhelming! I had just kissed the person I was supposed to hate. I kissed my Protectee. My first kiss was with my biggest enemy. How would my dad feel if he heard this?
"Are you sure you haven't kissed anyone before? You're a pretty good kisser," Kinn praised, priming his lips to taste the remnants of my desire.
Am I actually a good kisser?
Feeling ashamed, I hurriedly walked past him, wanting to run away and not look back. I didn't know where I'd go, but it'd be anywhere but here. Kinn caught my wrist and yanked me back to him.
"Where are you going?" He murmured.
I didn't want to answer, so I jerked my arm in an attempt to break free of his grip, but that only encouraged the boa constrictor's hand to tighten.
"Let go of me!" I said strongly.
"You can't honestly be mad at me right now. You kissed me," Kinn said, sounding hurt.
"I'm not mad at you. I'm mad at myself," I replied sincerely. Mad was an understatement. I was livid with myself, beyond livid.
"Why?"
"None of your business!" I snapped, tugging my hand hard enough that I successfully broke free of his hold.
"That's not fair. You said that as my bodyguard, you had to know about me. I should have those rights too," Kinn protested.
He was referring to the night of the knife fight. I'd demanded answers in the school parking lot after we escaped. In Kinn fashion, he dodged every question. I'd told him that I was supposed to know about his life so that I could better protect him. That comment didn't get me very far, unfortunately.
"Don't play that card. You haven't told me anything! You know more about me than I know about you," I pointed out.
"What do you want to know?" Even as I was raising my voice, Kinn's continued to remain calm. It was amazing how he could be calm under high-stress situations.
"Who are those people that tried to kill you? Why are they after you?" I asked, arms crossed over my chest. I doubted he'd answer any of my questions, which was the whole reason I asked them.
Kinn sighed. "I can't tell you."
"That's what I thought," I said sourly. I took one warning step.
Kinn huffed. "Please, I'll tell you anything else." It looked like he was really struggling to withhold information from me, but I knew he was just a good liar.
"Who are your parents?"
"I can't tell you that either." Kinn looked guilty, but I couldn't pinpoint what he was guilty of. Fuck. This conversation was leading us nowhere. It was fucking useless.
I scoffed. "Then what can you tell me?"
Kinn paused at that, thinking of what he was going to tell me. What lies could he come up with in such short timing?
"I have to put on my pants before my shirts because I like the feeling of a complete outfit," he finally said.
I rolled my eyes. Who cared about that?
"My music playlist is full of girl group songs," he admitted.
I stifled a chuckle. That was sort of interesting.
Kinn smirked. "I think you're sexy."
"Fuck off," I said, though I felt heat rise to my face and a small flutter in my chest.
I thought I wasn't his type.
"It's true. I have difficulty controlling myself around you," Kinn admitted shamelessly. He wasn't nearly as shy as I was.
"You need to work on that," I commented.
He laughed. "Pot calling the kettle black."
"Shut up." I glared. I hated myself for initiating the kiss. Kinn wasn't going to let go of that anytime soon.
"Don't act like you don't find me sexy too. You wouldn't kiss me like that if you didn't."
Kinn was right. It did feel amazing, but who was to say that was because it was him that I kissed? It was my first kiss after all. I was bound to have a unique reaction.
"I just needed someone to kiss, and you happened to be there!" I said firmly, trying to convince myself of that more than Kinn.
Kinn stood a short step close to me until I felt his breath shivering down my neck. He slid his hand across my chest. "Then why's your heart beating like this?" he murmured.
I nudged his arm away.
Kinn gave me a devious smile and stole a quick kiss.
I pulled back. We were not at that level, nor would we ever be. "Just because we kissed once doesn't mean you can kiss me whenever you feel like it."
"Does this mean I have to ask for your permission each time?" Kinn almost mocked the notion.
"You don't have to ask because I'm not going to kiss you again," I said sternly.
"Can I kiss you?" Kinn asked.
"Yes," I answered without thinking. Fuck these Freudian slips tonight!
Kinn kissed me again lightly and hopped onto the bed with a grin.
Stunned, I stood there and watched him, stupefied by my own words.