*Hehe
*MG are not married in this one. Just dating.
*Mew and Gulf go to celebrate their 2 year anniversary.
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Mew and Gulf was on their way out. It was their 2 year anniversary and Mew had made reservations for the both of them to have a lovely evening out.
Arriving at location Mew blind folded Gulf and led him to a doorway.
M: Okay I'm going to take the fold off now. Don't open your eyes unless I tell you to.
G: Okay. Hurry up though. You know how much I hate the dark.
Mew removed the blindfold for Gulf reminding him to keep his eyes closed. Opening the doorway Mew quietly walked besides Gulf and told him to open his eyes.
Tears welled up beautifully in the younger guys eyes as he looked at the surprise before him.
Behind the now open door way stood a rooftop beautifully decorated with golden lights hanging. A white banner with gold letters spelling out 2 YEARS WITH YOU!
As if that wasn't enough there stood a rectangular table with 2 chairs on opposite side and a beautiful boquet of sunflowers on the table. The table was nicely decorated with black and gold cloth with utensils organized neatly in their needed location.
M: Come on have a seat.
Leading Gulf to the chair by the doorway Mew pulled out the chair and handed him the sunflower.
M: This is for you. And so is everything else here. Happy 2 year anniversary baby.
Soft wails could be heard coming from Gulf, as he set the sunflower back on the table.
Mew went to hug his lover rubbing his hand smoothly across the others back.
M: Its okay. You deserve all this. Now put those tears away and let's celebrate our good two years together.
Minutes later Mew and Gulf were situated at the table eating food that Mew had some staffs deliver.
The anniversary dinner was well planned out as both went through light conversation.
M: Are you filled yet?
Mew questioned his lover who stared down at his empty plate with a light smile across his face.
G: Yes.
M: Well I have another surprise for you.
Looking up at Mew, Gulf saw his lover approach him with a bright beautiful smile.
Bowing down gently Mew outstretched his hand requesting Gulf to hold it.
Without a second guess the other guy did just that as Mew drew him to a bit of distance away from the table.
M: Wait here.
Pulling out his phone Mew put some music on when suddenly it could be heard all around them.
Gulf was guessing that the place either had a built in speaker or the organizers hid it really well.
Grabbing Gulf by the waist and entangling their arms both fellows moves gracefully to the music.
Mew had never been more in love.
It was in this moment that he really knew that Gulf was the one for him. And he had no other plans but to keep this man beside him for a long time.
Untangling their hands for a few seconds Mew reached into his pants pocket pulling out a tiny box.
Gulf took notice of the movement and finally made eye contact with his lover.
Mew got down on one knees and Gulf busted out in tears.
This was the moment. The moment Gulf had always wanted so badly. The moment he would pray for every night for years that he had a crush on Mew. And when they finally started dating he wasn't sure if he was going to make it this far.
But he did.
M: Gulf. My one and true soulmate. Tonight as we celebrate 2 years of being boyfriends I want to take this time to change that title. Because a guy like you deserve so much. Despite me not knowing fully well if I can give you everything you want, I want to be the person who can provide all your needs. The one that you can rely on and the one that relies on you. I want to be the lover that makes you know how much you're worth, on your successful/best days and also the one who reminds you of the worth on your depressing day. I really suck at proposal and didn't write a speech because I wanted to speak from my heart. But it's funny that when you're around I always seem to be at a loss for words. Instead of saying all of this now I want to say this on our wedding day when we promise to stay together for a long time. Gulf Kanawut will you marry me."
Shit. The tears were heavily clouding his eyes. He couldn't even see the guy that was proposing to him now.
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G: Mew Suppasit. My one and true love. You know very much my fear of the darkness but since the day you came into my life you've always been my light. My shoulder and my priority. Today as you kneel infront of me to propose I wouldn't even think twice to say yes.
G: But I won't.
M: Oh my god thank you baby for accepting my- wait what?
Now it was Mews turn to cry.
M: What baby? Are you saying no. Are you rejecting my proposal? Why. What is it. Did I say something wrong? Is this some sort of prank? Gulf babe if this is a joke then it's not funny. It's seriously not. Stop playing-
G: No Mew. Unfortunately for both you and I sake this is not a joke. Before we both go any further and regret this more than we already will let's just end it here.
M: You can't just break up with me Gulf. This is some joke right. Stop fucking playing with me. GULF! WHAT THE HELL IS THIS.
Both guys were now in full blown tears.
M: You can't do this to me. Not when I finally realized that I can't live without you. If you leave me now I will surely die. Gulf baby please. Don't do this.
G: No Mew. I have no choice but to. Were not good for each other. I'm not good for you. I'm not-
M: WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN. Gulf your not good for me you're perfect. We BELONG together. Baby whoever told you that should go die. We belong together and nothing can change that. WHO THE HELL TOLD YOU THAT WE'RE NOT GOOD FOR EACH OTHER.
G: You. You did! Mew you did. You did all of this. If you didn't love me why didn't you just say so. Why waste my fucking time Mew? What did I ever do wrong to you?
Gulf was sniffling with his puffy red nose, tears streaked filled eyes.
G: I found out. Why did I have to find out? Why did you have to do this. Just why?
Gulf crouched to the floor holding his stomach.
To say that Mew was confused was an understatement. His lover was rambling about different things. Each time his words got more incoherent over his sobs.
M: What do you mean baby? What did I do?
G: You cheated Mew. Why the hell would you cheat on me. What did I ever do to you Mew that would cause you to cheat.
Gulf wails got louder as Mew was dead silent. Gulfs words were ringing in his ears as he held gulfs already limp body in his hands.
G: I was going to do this anyway after today. But I didn't expect your proposal. I've been trying to prepare myself and wait until I finally come to terms with it so it wouldn't hurt as much. Sooner or later this relationship would have had to come to an end.
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Both guys had collected themselves as they now laid on the floors eyes facing the skies. They were a few feet apart.
Gulf had wiped his face with his coat sleeves as silence engulfed them both.
M: when did you find out?
G: I've known for a while. About 6 months ago. One day I went by the office to drop off a document and lunch that you left at home. I was so excited to see you and I thought you'd be excited to see me too since we only ever got to see each other out of work.
I was about to knock on the office but heard noises. At first I thought you was in a meeting but they didn't sound like meeting noises. And that was the first time I caught you.
The second time was on the set of your recent project. I had the day off and then again wanted to surprise you. But it seems as though you were also good with surprises when I saw you and one of the actress exiting a storage closet trying to fix yourselves up. When I entered the closet I saw an empty condom wrapper.
And the last time was 3 months ago when the actress I saw you come out the closet with visited me at my job. She told me that she was pregnant and that she was sure the child was yours. I didn't want to believe her but with all I had been seeing I had no other choice but to.
But she wasn't convinced if I believed her and she showed me pictures of you and guys going out on dates and pictures of you dropping her off at home.
A single drop of tear escaped gulfs eyes once more.
G: Mew you know how much I hate the dark but every night you would come home late, or cancel our plans thinking I wouldn't notice, you'd actually pushed me further into the dark. Many nights I had panic attacks and when you thought I was sleeping I would pass out only to not wake up until the next day.
Many days I tried to confront you, but i was never strong enough for it. Then suddenly you started being nicer to me. I thought that you might come clean about your actions but you never did. Only for that same actress to visit me apologizing about thinking that the baby could be yours. That the baby was actually her boyfriends.
She explained how you told her that you regretted everything and that you only cheated on me because you wasn't sure that we really were meant for each other. She explained a lot of things to me Mew. And the fact that I learned so much about you from a stranger honestly broke me.
It took me months waiting for you to come clean and even up until now you still didn't. I thought that tonight I could end it but then you bring up things about wanting to get married and it actually drove me insane.
I'm sure that if I'm in this any longer ill completely lose myself and end up killing myself because of this relationship. So before things get worse. Please let me go Mew.
Let me live for myself. Let me experience things. Let me build what you've broken. Let me be free and happy finally. Because this love isn't what I need.
And without another word Gulf had disappeared from Mews sight. He couldn't even chase the other because Gulf was like the night breeze and like the waters in the lake bed, just flowing easily through his fingers with no way to hold it down. And just like the wind and water Gulf was not his to hold.
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Mew jumped awake in his bed. He woke up with full tears streaming down his face.
The nightmare of their broken anniversary always came to haunt Mew. And it's even been a year after the breakup.
A year after and Mew has retracted. He's lost contact completely with his old self.
He's lost contact with the strong, wealthy and open man that Gulf had once built him to be. Now he was a shadow of what he had made Gulf when he cheated.
And from then Mew knew that he belonged to no one else but Gulf. If there's no Gulf there's no Mew.
He won't take his life because everyday he still has a little bit of hope that his angel and light will return.
Everyday he cries out to the wind and the waters that it gives him a chance to hold them. To hold Gulf.
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Yes this sucks. I'm really not good with angst. I tried so hard honestly. When I wrote this I was overfilled with emotions and headache but when I reread it everything happened so quickly with not enough explanations, or good timing.
And like most time I feel as though there's empty spaces in here. But I tried my best.
*Anyways I only wrote this because someone broke my wanjaii heart with a misinformed Mewgulf post!