EPISODE 27
Y/n's POV
Polnareff was smoking a cigarette
"How are they both doing?" Polnareff asks
"Thanks to Y/n, Avdol is just resting currently. Kakyoin still had serious injuries though. He might go blind" Joseph says
"I should've healed him" I said
"No you would've collapsed" Joseph said. Jotaro looked at us confused due to him not being there
"Yeah, you took a step and fell down" Polnareff says
"But I'm fine now" I say
"I'm worried for Kakyoin" Polnareff says
"Sadly, Kakyoin might be out of action for the rest of this trip" Jotaro says. I frown. We then stopped.
"Hey, there are a lot of cafés around here. Let's get a drink and relax" Polnareff says
"Great idea. Which one?" Joseph asks. Polnareff flicks his cigarette and it hits the ground
"My cigarette picked that one" Polnareff says. We walked to that one and sat down
"Welcome. What would you like?" The waiter asks
"Let's see, I'd like some black tea" Polnareff says
"Same" Jotaro says
"All right. Four black teas, then?" He asks walking away
I didn't even order- okay
"No, we'd better not" Joseph says
"Huh?" Polnareff asks
"Listen. We're in Egypt, which is enemy territory. More enemies are lurking around us than ever before, and we don't know when they'll attack. We have to be more careful than we've been when it comes to poison. From now on, only drink from bottles or cans" Joseph says
"What? Are you serious?" Polnareff asks
"Hey, forget the black tea. We're going to have cola instead" Joseph says. The man turns around
"Cola?!" The man asks
"Yeah. Something wrong with that?" Jotaro asks
"N-No. Okay. Cola, right? So four colas, then" the man says
"Oh, and we'll take the caps off at the table ourselves. Also, usually want the third, fourth, fifth, and sixth colas from the right" Joseph says
"Hey, Manager! This cola isn't cold at all. Your shop servers warm cola? I'm not gonna pay, you jerk!" A customer says. Joseph turns around
"Hey are the colas not cold?" Joseph asks
Joseph plus hot cola does not mix
"Th-The refrigerator is broken" The man says
"You're being too paranoid. Even if that guy were our enemy, and if he were really trying to poison us. How would he know that we'd come in here? This city has all these cafés, and I happened to choose this one. If there were only one café, maybe, but there are plenty" Polnareff says
"I'm just saying that being careful can't hurt" Joseph says
"If you're that concerned, then let's change cafés. We'll go to the one across the street" Polnareff says getting up
"All right" Joseph says as the rest of us get up
"Fire!" Some random person yells
"My café is on fire! A spark from a cigarette some jerk left in the road got into the trash!" The man cries out. I slap Polnareff's neck
"It was your cigarette" I mutter. He whines
"Don't hit me Y/n" He says
"Hey, Manager. We'll take four black teas after all" Joseph says
"But I don't like black tea" I say
"Suffer, I guess" Polnareff says
This man makes me want to burn down cities
We all sit back down and the waiter comes back with black tea. He then walks off
"Man, to throw a lit cigarette in the trash. This world sure has some real jerks in it" Polnareff says
"It was your cigarette that you dropped on the ground!" I yell out as everyone goes to drink their black teas. Suddenly Iggy ran ontop of the table
"Eek! This dog ate my cake!" A woman yells
"Who brought a dog in here?!" The man asks. I turn as I got hit in the face with black tea.
"Which one of you did that?!" I ask cracking my knuckles. Joseph and Polnareff squealed
"It was him!" They both yelled. Suddenly we all looked to see Iggy
"Iggy!" We all say
"Whose dog is this?" The woman asks as she throws plates at the dog
"Hey! Get this dog outta here!" The man yelled. Iggy ran out so we all followed
"Iggy!" Joseph yelled
"Stop, you stupid dog!" Polnareff yelled as we all chased the dog.
~Time Skip~
Jotaro had left us so it was now me, Polnareff and Joseph. We approached our car when we saw someone in there
"Who's there? Who's in our car?" Polnareff asks
"It's not Jotaro?" Joseph asks
"No. Jotaro said he was going straight to the hospital. Be careful" Polnareff says
So that's where he went
"Maybe it's a pathetic man" I say with a grin
"Don't let him get away!" Joseph says
"Oh, don't worry. I won't" I say with a crazed look in my eye
Human trash deserve to be treated as such
"Yeah, we know Y/n" Polnareff says creeped out. Joseph and Polnareff got closer
"Hey, don't hide in there!" Polnareff says
"Who are you? Come out" Joseph says. We see a hat
"We told you to come out!" Polnareff says
"Hurry it up!" Joseph says. We then see Jotaro?
"Hey, hey, why the panic? It's me, Polnareff" Jotaro says?
He looks kind of off
"Oh, it's you, Jotaro" Joseph says. I walk closer. I noticed his hat was taller, his clothes had changed and his eyes were purple
I'm 90% sure this isn't Jotaro
"But what happened? You said you were going straight to the hospital" Polnareff says
"Huh? Um, uh yeah. I left something in the car, so I came back for it. My wallet. It was my wallet, yeah. Good grief" the imposter says
"Jotaro, what happened to your school jacket?" Joseph asks
"S-School jacket?" The imposter asks
"That's really not a good look on you" Polnareff says. I pull Joseph down and begin speaking
"I don't think that's Jotaro so just go with whatever I do, okay?" I ask. He nods
"Yeah, usually you're so fashionable Jotaro. I can't have my boyfriend looking like this" I say with a disgusted look
"B-Boyfriend?" He asks
"Did you forget silly, I'm your girlfriend" I say
"Oh haha right" He says. I look at Joseph and smirk
Got him in the palm of my hand
"Wait you two are dating?! Why does everyone keep secrets from me?!" Polnareff asks
"Because it was supposed to be a surprise but then Jotaro started acting all weird" I say
"So why are you wearing those clothes?" Joseph asks
"Oh right, clothes. School jacket, huh. I-It's at the cleaners! I took it to the cleaners, and didn't have any money" The man says. I laugh
"Oh, Jotaro, that's just like you" I say. He nervously laughs
"Well you know me" he says with a nervous smile
"Huh. I see. Then hurry up and get in the car. We're going" Polnareff says
"Nah, a-actually, I think I'm going to walk" the man says but Polnareff grabs his shoulder
"What are you talking about, Jotaro? From here, it'll be a lot faster to take the car" Polnareff says stuffing the man in the car. I get in the back from the other side
So how shall I torture this stand user who follows Dio?
We were all in the car and then we drove off
"Hey, it's Iggy! I can't believe he jumped in while we're moving. He's got an orange in his mouth! Did you steal that, Iggy? That might be a nice gift for Kakyoin" Polnareff says as we all stare at Iggy
"Yow!" The man says. We all look at him
"'Yow'?" We all ask
"You don't usually make noises like that. You're acting weird" Joseph says.
"N-No. Yow. You know, y-yow. I-I was saying there was a cyow over there" The man says pointing. We do in face see one
"So I have news to share with everyone" I say
"What is it you demon lady?" Polnareff asks. An evil grin appears on my face
I will make a fool out of Polnareff and scare this wannabe
"I'm expecting and Jotaro's the father" I say.
"Huh?!" Polnareff and the man ask
"Yeah, while we checked Kakyoin in, I got a test and I was positive. Isn't that so cute, we're going to have a kid Jotaro" I say with a smile. The man was sweating bullets
"Y-Yay" he says
"Jotaro, you're really weird today. You're not together, man. You're not actually a fake, are you?" Polnareff asks
This idiot still hasn't realized...
The man went silent and me and Joseph patiently waited for him to break
"G-Good grief. What are you talking about, Polnareff?" The man asks
"It's probably from the big news" I say to Polnareff
"I guess you're right" He says and turns around. Polnareff lit a cigarette
"Say, Jotaro. Do that special trick of yours" Polnareff says
"Special trick?" He asks
"I learned it from you. You know, this!" Polnareff says as he basically puts the entire cigarette in his mouth.
"Hey, you've gotten better" Joseph says
"O-Oh, that's what you meant. Sure! I'll do it. It's easy" the man says
"All right! Do the one where you have five in your mouth at once!" Polnareff says. I began laughing
Please this can't get any better
"F-Five?!" He asks
"Come on! Hurry up and do it. I wanna see it again" Polnareff says playing with the orange. The man takes out five cigarettes along with a lighter. The puts them in his mouth and then lights them all. Joseph begins laughing and I stare with a giant smirk on my face
I hope you burn your mouth
"Come on, hurry up!" Polnareff says. The man begins trying to do it
"O-Ow, hot! Hot!" The man said. Polnareff then held juice infront of them man
"Here. Last time, you drank some juice without putting the cigarettes out" Polnareff says. The man grabs the bottle
"Come on. Aw, you failed" Polnareff says as the man began yelling
"Jotaro, are you all right? Oh my God!" Joseph says
"Jotaro, you're acting really weird today" Polnareff says
"I-I just f-feel a but under the weather" the man says. Polnareff then points at the man
"Jotaro, the way you have your hands together. You've got your left thumb on top!" Polnareff says. He then begins laughing
"The way you put your hands together proves you were a woman in a past life! My fortune said that since I put my right thumb on top, I was a man in a past life!" Polnareff says
"Wow, really? I always put my left thumb on top, myself" Joseph says
"Then you were definitely a woman in a past life, Mister Joestar" Polnareff says
"What do you mean, definitely? How would you even prove that? It's so stupid!" Joseph says. Him and Polnareff began laughing
"Jotaro, let's see who can eat a whole orange faster!" Polnareff says
"What?! H-Hey. Stop!" The man yells as Polnareff goes to peel the orange
"Whoa! What are you doing, Jotaro?!" Polnareff asks
"Oh" He says
"Wh-What's wrong, Jotaro?" Joseph asks
"Oh, it's nothing" he says
"You really are acting weird" Joseph says
It's so sad that Polnareff hasn't figured it out
"I don't think y-y-you should eat that orange" The man says
"Huh? Why?" Polnareff asks
"W-Well, you know. It's the one Iggy picked up. It could have been in the gutter. Eat this one instead" The man says
"It's not dirty or bruised. It's fine. Whatever. I'll eat this one, and you try with one of those" Polnareff says
"Ow!" The man yells out in pain
If only I was causing you such pain
"H-Hey" Polnareff says
"My stomach hurts! My stomach hurts so bad, I can't stand it! S-Stop the car! Hurry!" The man says
"Your stomach hurts?" Polnareff asks. Suddenly the man gets into the front
"I can't stand it anymore! Let me out! Let me out! I'll go behind some rock!" The man says
"But the hospital is right there" Joseph says pointing to the hospital
"Just go ahead without me. Seriously, just go on ahead!" The man says as he exits the vehicle
"Hold it, Jotaro! Here's some paper" Polnareff says. The man takes it and sprints away
"Polnareff, you do know that's a fake right?" I ask. Polnareff looked at me shocked
"What do you mean?" Polnareff asks
"That's not Jotaro" I say
"And how do you know that?" Polnareff asks
"One, I said I was his girlfriend straight forward and he agreed which me and Jotaro are not dating. Two I said I was expecting even though I'm a virgin and three, Jotaro doesn't have purple eyes" I say
"I didn't even notice" Polnareff says
"I can tell you didn't" I say rolling my eyes
"So are you actually pregnant with Jotaro's kid?" He asks. I facepalm. Suddenly we hear a loud noise
"What was that sound?" Polnareff asks
"Don't worry about it. Probably construction or something" Joseph says. We finally got to the hospital and we saw the real Jotaro
"Well, if it isn't Jotaro" Joseph says. Jotaro turns
"I can't believe you're going to be a father!" Polnareff exclaims. My eyes widened in pure horror as I turned to look at Polnareff who had a grin on his face
He's doing it on purpose
"What do you mean?" Jotaro asks
"Don't listen to anything this man says!" I yell out
"You were so excited to tell us" Polnareff says
"That was a fake Jotaro! I was messing with the guy! And you too" I mutter that last part out
"Well karma sucks doesn't it" Polnareff says
"You jerk!" I yell out. Am ambulance pulled up and we saw the man who was 'Jotaro'
"Do you know them?" Jotaro asks
"Never met such a pathetic man before so no" I say as we walk
"Now, let's go find out how Kakyoin's doing" Joseph says
(2339 words)
7/16/21