CHAPTER NINE
❝ no going back ❞
AFTER GRADUATION WAS over, Bucky walked Lucy home.
They strolled to Lucy's apartment, hand in hand. Once they reached the building, Lucy used her key to unlock the door, pushing it open with her foot and inviting Bucky inside since her father was still away.
Lucy's expression lit up when she remembered that she had Bucky's graduation present in her coat pocket. She lead him to the couch, pulling him down onto the cushions and sitting so that they were facing each other. "I've got something for you."
Bucky could practically feel the waves of excitement rolling off of her. Her smile was infectious, influencing his own lips to twist upwards. "What do you mean?"
She pulled out a small box that had newspaper and a red ribbon wrapped around it. "Your graduation present."
"Luce," Bucky softly drawled her name, sighing at how thoughtful she was. "I didn't get you anything."
Lucy timidly shook her head. "Technically, yes you did. And I'm very happy with the stuffed bear that you won me."
Bucky made a mental note to get her something better than a measly stuffed animal. She deserved the world. He wouldn't have accepted the present if it weren't for the adorable look on her face, waiting for him to open the box.
"Please, just open it," Lucy begged, pushing the box into Bucky's chest.
Bucky reluctantly took the box in his hands, undoing the little red ribbon surrounding it. His eyes flickered between her and the bow, comparing the ruby color of the material to Lucy's lipstick color.
Slowly unveiling the contents of his present, Bucky's entire demeanor softened when he realized what she had gotten him. "A compass."
Wringing her hands together, Lucy nodded at his observation. "Yeah! The first thing that came to my mind was a watch, but," she trailed off, pointing to his wrist with a breathy laugh. "You already have a watch, so, I thought, what else could Bucky Barnes want? "
Bucky was barely even taking in her words, entranced by the way Lucy rambled on and on. She could talk on and on about something she was passionate about for hours on end. It was one of the many things that he admired about her.
What else could Bucky Barnes want? When she said those words, only one thing came to mind. He wanted to blurt it out, interrupt her and make sure that she knew just what he wanted.
Her.
God, he wanted her so bad. He needed her. He always had, even if it took him a while to realize it.
"...And then," Lucy brought him back with her sweet voice. "I remembered how you told me about your dream of traveling to the Grand Canyon while we were on the Ferris wheel." She clicked open the gold accessory and pointed at the inscription.
Bucky's voice trembled a bit when he saw what she had engraved. "Lucy..."
To help you reach the top of the world. ♡ L
She remembered.
Still in awe, Bucky lifted his head and stared at Lucy adoringly. "Luce, this must've cost a ton of money." She opened her mouth to reiterate, but Bucky just kept on going. "Actually, damn the money! This probably cost an arm or something—"
"Bucky." Lucy put her hand on his chest, interrupting his own rambling. Truth be told, she did save the money that she made from the diner for Bucky's present, paying extra for the engraving as well, but it was all worth it. Giving Bucky the compass was just a substitute for telling him about her being inexplicably in love with him.
The poor girl was clueless. Head over heels and clueless.
If only she knew.
Bucky rubbed his thumb over the gold of the compass, smiling like a fool. He looked back up at Lucy, getting lost in her compassionate eyes.
"Maybe we could get you a journal too. You can write all about it for me—"
"Woah, hang on." Bucky gently stopped her, sliding closer. "You think that I'm goin' there without my best girl?"
Heat spread through Lucy's cheeks at the term. She could only hope that the soft light in the room didn't expose the heavy blush coating her face.
Bucky cupped the side of her face with his right hand, gently stroking her soft skin with the pad of his thumb. Lucy's eyes strayed down to his lips momentarily, quickly refocusing on his eyes when she realized how obvious her gaze was. He smirked when he saw her eyes flicker, more than relieved that he wasn't the only one feeling the energy between them.
No words were exchanged as they stared at one another. Bucky lifted his other hand and brought it to the back of her head, sinking his fingers into her voluminous hair to pull her closer.
Lucy followed his lead, closing her eyes and letting their lips crash together.
It started out gentle. Their lips moved against one another, dancing in sync. The butterflies that Lucy had always felt around Bucky erupted. As if they were finally set free.
She had always read about the feeling of fireworks exploding when kissing the right person for the first time. But that wasn't how it was.
As soon as their lips had connected, Lucy felt a wave of soft passion wash over her. She felt safer than she ever had before and her heart soared with the affection. Bucky was her cool breeze on a hot summer day. Her warm blanket during a dreary, rainy night. He was her peace.
The kiss lit a fire inside Bucky. It was a seal of affection, so many words communicated yet none truly spoken. He pulled away for a moment, staring at her with a type of adoration that was so beautiful and pure. The type of adoration that was reserved for her eyes only.
Bucky ran his thumb against her swollen bottom lip while exhaling a shuddering breath. "Tell me to stop."
Lucy stared at him for a long moment before lightly shaking her head. "What if I don't want you to stop?" Her question was soft, matching the tone of his statement.
Nothing else was said before their lips collided again. The second kiss was hungrier. It was desperate. Bucky wanted her closer. He needed more of her. When he snaked an arm around her waist and pulled her body to his, Lucy gasped, allowing Bucky to slip his tongue into her mouth.
She stood and tugged him up with her, blindly walking backward to her room as they continued to make out. Each time that the two bumped into something, they stumbled and laughed into each other's mouths. Bucky reached a hand out and patted the air for a second before feeling the doorknob to her room, pushing it open and pulling her inside in one swift movement.
"Jump," Bucky mumbled against her lips, tapping the back of her thighs with two fingers. She obeyed his command, wrapping her legs around Bucky's torso as he hoisted her into the air. He crossed the room and lowered her onto the bed, both sinking into the softness of the duvet covers.
He propped himself up on his elbows as he hovered over her, brushing a strand of hair from her eyes and pressing a loving kiss to the tip of her nose. "You're so beautiful, Luce."
Lucy would never stop blushing when it came to Bucky's words. She let her eyes flutter shut when he began leaving kisses under her jaw, breathing out an airy sigh when he started caressing her curves, worshiping her as if she was a goddess.
To him, she was.
Bucky lifted his head back up and ghosted his hands over the straps of her dress. He didn't even need to speak for Lucy to know what he was asking for. She gave a desperate nod, her anticipation overpowering her nerves.
"You sure?" Bucky gave her another out, making sure that her comfort was the priority.
Lucy nodded. "Please."
He slid two fingers under each strap, pushing the fabric down each arm. Lucy sat up, interrupting his actions by grabbing the hem of his shirt and sliding it over his head. Bucky's torso looked like a sculpture, his features carved by the greatest artists that history had ever seen.
Once her dress was off, Lucy subconsciously removed her hands from Bucky and instead used them to cover herself up.
It seemed impossible for her to see her own beauty.
She had beautiful hints of curves. Slight divots of cellulite were scattered around her thighs and butt. Stretch marks wrapped around her upper torso from where her breasts quickly grew during puberty. Dark spots still lingered on her face from her hormonal acne years ago, hidden by layers of concealer. Her body wasn't perfect, but neither was the world.
Each mark wasn't a flaw, but a defining trait.
Bucky didn't notice her timidness at first. He was too focused on burning the image into his brain of how ethereal she looked, her features illuminated by the moonlight.
As soon as he noticed the placement of her hands, Bucky frowned. He pressed a gentle kiss to her cheek, whispering, "Sweetheart, you don't ever have to cover up around me. I've said it before and I'll say it again. You are beautiful."
She let him take one hand in his own, intertwining their fingers together as they shared a slow kiss. His other hand traced down her torso, leaving goosebumps in its wake.
Lucy carded a hand through Bucky's hair and slid the other around his bare shoulder, suddenly feeling incredibly shy. "I've never done this before. Never trusted anyone as much as I trust you."
Bucky gave her a loving smile, pushing stray wisps of hair out of her face. He was admiring her. Admiring how his biggest fantasy turned into a memory. If it were up to him, the memory would be burned into his brain, ready to play it back at any time.
He would never forget the predominant beauty of Lucy Everhart.
"Nobody's ever made me feel the way you make me feel," Bucky told her, words tender and slow. "Can I show you that I mean it?"
Lucy's heart soared. She nodded, her lips parted and eyes warm.
He stayed true to his word. Bucky spent the whole night showing her the deep emotions she made him feel. He kissed every inch of her body and held her close, saying everything he wanted to say, without the fear of her not feeling the same.
Eventually, Lucy settled in Bucky's arms. Still coming down from her high, she struggled to wrap her head around the fact that he was there, holding her as she had been previously wishing he would. She buried her face into his chest, tiredly letting her eyes flutter shut.
Bucky chuckled at her blissed smile, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. "C'mon, honey. Let's get you cleaned up before you fall asleep on me."
They showered together in silence, hands still exploring each other's bodies. Bucky picked up the soap and ran it over Lucy's body, stopping every now and then to massage her muscles and press a kiss to wherever he could.
The warmth of the shower felt like heaven. Lucy hugged Bucky's chest, pressing kisses into his neck as they held each other under the stream of water. When the water eventually started to lose its heat, Bucky turned the knob off and reached out to grab a towel.
He carried her back into her room, about to grab her a shirt until he saw her reach for the one he was wearing before. With a smile on his face, he simply slipped on his boxers and slid back under the covers, pulling Lucy with him.
It seemed foolish but Lucy was scared to go to sleep. She was terrified that it was just a dream and that she would wake up all alone.
Bucky seemed to sense her worry, pulling her up for a gentle kiss before settling her on his chest. He rubbed a hand over her back and pulled the comforter closer, making sure she was comfortable. "Sleep, Luce. I'll be here when you wake up."
"Promise?"
"Promise."
And with that, Lucy fell asleep with a smile on her face, listening to Bucky's heartbeat.
For the first time in her life, Lucy finally felt like she was home.
AUTHOR'S NOTE!
EVERYBODY STAY CALM, IT'S HAPPENING.
i nearly cried from all the soft moments in this chapter.
they really do love each other, even if they're both too scared to say it.
bucky worshipped lucy's body in the way she's always deserved *crying*
and yes, this chapter is up a day early because i don't get home from work until late tomorrow.
hugs and kisses to all of you!
<3 mal