"Lalala~Lala~La~Lalalalala~"
"....excuse me, Miss Senpai?"
"Yes, my dear Kouhai-kun?"
"....until when are you going to hold my hand?"
"Until we arrive at the cake shop!"
Senpai held my hand as we walked towards the cafe. We really skipped school as she said. The eyes of the students in classes sure made me feel annoyed when they saw me and Senpai walked together. Since we took our belongings in the class before we left, I made sure to take the cameras and recorders that I hid to watch the recordings later.
With our highschool uniforms, Senpai led me inside the cafe. The manager here who noticed us, grinned in understanding as she was used to see our faces. She was talking to the receptionist when we entered the cafe.
"Skipping again? That's not a good habit, you know?"
"This time is a special case. Can you pretend not to see us? Please, Big Sis?"
"Geez, I guess I'll let you guys off this time. But, I want to hear the story later. Is that okay?"
"Sure!"
"I'm not asking you though."
Senpai made our intention clear as she spoke with her elder sister. Since we had been visiting this cafe every time we skipped classes, the manager had already known what kind of person I was. I was bewildered a bit to be honest when she did not really mind of all rumors about me. I was thankful.
Still not letting me go, Senpai went to a hidden side of the cafe which only the VIP of this cafe could enter and found us a table. Only then, she let go of my hand. She was humming a song which seemed to be sung by a famous idol group which appeared in almost every show on TV. I wondered why she was being so happy, so I asked her.
"Senpai, did something good happened?"
"Oh, is it really that noticable? Hehe, it's rare that we can have a date like this. So, I am really excited to have fun with you."
".....it's not really a date when we're not in a relationship though.
"Ah, you're back to you're previous style of speech."
Perhaps I had calmed down now, my speech returned to how I always speak. My mind slowed down as rationality began to spread in my mind. Without even feeling a little hope that Senpai possesses the feelings akin to love to me, I managed to avoid creating an embarrassing and annoying misunderstanding with Senpai. Being the easygoing girl she was, she probably knew that I would not be falling for her even if she tried to use such words.
"What are you ordering, Kouhai?"
"....I'll just have orange juice and candies."
"Hmm. Even though I've known you for a few years, I still can't figure out why a mature and adult-like person like you will drink such a childish beverage."
"....thinking that orange juice is a childish beverage is the thinking of immature people."
"Then, I'll order Bandung and the cake in the commercial. Big Sis, here!"
".....ignoring my comment, huh?"
"Not really, just I don't have any counter for those words. I'll lose if I fight words with you after all."
Senpai really did not hide her feelings at all. She then ordered our drinks and the cake she wanted to try to the manager. It was strange for the manager herself to take our orders but we did not mind it since it had already a while since we knew each other.
When our orders had arrived, Senpai had sparkling eyes as she enjoyed the view of a beautiful slice of cake. I guessed she really wanted to taste it. I did not watch the television, so I didn't know what cake it was. Neither did I care about it.
Then, as if it was natural, the manager pulled a chair and sat with us on the same table. I did not really pay attention to her as I sipped a little of my orange juice. My mask was taken off since I wanted to drink and eat. The cracked spectacles were thrown away.
As expected, it's faintly sweet. Just how I prefer it.
"Even after all these years, I still wonder how you can drink the same juice every time you come here."
"....it's one of my favorites."
"Yes, yes I know. So, what's the story this time?"
The manager asked me as she looked at me with a tender smile. She was one of the people who did not really care about the rumors around me. That was why, I did not wear my mask and spectacles around her. I still let my hair cover my face though.
"It's the same old thing. But, this time Kouhai-kun almost involve the police. He's the victim though."
"Ehh~. What did you get accused of to the point the police almost got roped in?"
"It seems like he was accused of stealing his classmate's stuffs. I don't really know the whole situation though. I arrived at the scene when things were heated by him."
"Bro, tell me. What happened?"
Just when I thought Senpai would explain, the manager turned her attention to me as Senpai mentioned that she didn't really know much. If I had to say something, Senpai just wanted me to take the pain of explaining while she enjoyed her cake. Well, fine. She helped me out, so it didn't hurt to return the favour.
"....just same old things. The girl's stuffs were gone. They found them in my desk. Accused me of stealing. Called to the staff's room. Slapped. Being scolded. The teachers did not believe me. Things solved because I had alibi. Then, we arrived here."
I would say this. I was not a really good storyteller if I didn't have the mood. Even when Senpai asked me to tell her about my past, I barely managed to explain it while having the difficult to do it.
Even so, the manager understood what I said. She nodded in return as she heard me. Just when I thought she would say something, she took Senpai's drink and drank it. While Senpai and I looked at her in surprise, she actually drank half of it before slamming the glass on the table angrily.
"...aahh~. I really want to have a smoke in my hand now."
"Nope, you have already quit it and I won't let you do it."
"Yeah, right. But, this is really irritating me."
The manager scratched her head grumpily as she complained. I handed her one of the candies I ordered for her to calm down. She took it and threw one inside her mouth. Perhaps, due to the sweet taste, her expression became softer. In the meantime, I unwrapped one lollipop and sucked it.
"Hey, Yozora. That damn teachers and classmates of yours, are they all idiots?"
"....can't say that though since they can think but not properly."
"That's what we call idiot. Geez, just thinking of how they just blamed you without investigating about it makes me mad. Aren't you angry though, Yozora? You're the victim."
Me? I wondered about it. I was not really angry about it. If anything, I felt annoyed and bad for causing trouble to Miss Minamoto and if this came to the other miss Minamoto's ears, I would probably not be returning home.
"....not really."
"Damn, you're emotionless. You should feel angry about it since you've every right to do so."
".....it will only makes me tired in the end. Not like they will change their perception of me."
"Well, I can't really deny that. But, seriously. No matter how many times I heard this kind of stuff happening to you, they always make me feel irritated."
"....don't be angry. It ruins your pretty face."
As the lollipop in my mouth melted, I threw away the stick and proceeded to drink my orange juice. I was thankful that she felt for me but there was simply no use.
"Once again. You and your compliment, do you ever think about becoming my boyfriend?"
"....thanks for the question but no."
"Ahh~, I have been rejected."
She playfully bickered with me. I knew that she was not truly serious about that since it had been more than a few times she joked around like that.
"Kouhai, here. Aahh~"
"....no thanks, but—"
"Aahh~"
"....there's nothing that can stop you, huh....aah."
"Good boy, good boy."
As I ate the cake fed by Senpai, she patted my head like I had done a great job doing it. Honestly, I did not hate it. Seeing her smiling happily as she fed me seemed to be rewarding to me. I did not lose anything by complying to her demand.
"After all these years, I still wonder. Why the hell do you guys not hook up yet? Doing this lovey-dovey stuffs in front of me, it's like you two are bragging to me who is still single. Makes me annoyed."
The manager, Miss Shiori said as she watched Senpai feeding me her cake. The cake was honestly too sweet for me, so I only took a few bites before refraining. Senpai seemed to be disheartened when I stopped eating but she immediately became brighter when I turned to feed her the cake next.
Miss Shiori just watched us as we acted like she was not there. Since she was probably used to our antics, she just let us be. Maybe because she saw how happy her little sister's face, she also smiled happily.
Miss Shiori and Senpai had history back then. They were not as close as they were now. Senpai had confessed about her family matters to me once before. Back then, Senpai could not accept her elder sister's existence in her life while Miss Shiori ignored her since she did not know how to interact with Senpai. Well, long story short, things happened one or two and they made up. They seemed to be grateful to me and thanked me when they reconciled though. I did not really know why since I think I did not really lend a hand in the process.
I still had many things I don't know about Senpai and Miss Shiori, but I would not try to know about them before they personally tell me about them.
Time passed as we chatted like that. After we finished our drinks, we bid goodbye to Miss Shiori and walked around the city since Senpai still wanted to stroll. As I promised, I intended to pay for our drinks and the cake. Nevertheless, Miss Shiori considered them as freebies when I opened my wallet. I thanked her for her benevolence.
".....don't you think it's time to go home? School's over already."
"Not yet, I need you help to get the teddy that I want. Therefore, help me. You're pro with the claw game, right? Don't worry, as long as it is within a thousand yen, you can try as many times as you want."
"....don't waste your money on that game."
Senpai led me by hand to the arcade. There, we saw some people trying their luck with her games there while some other were playing with their friends. Although there were eyes attracted to the figure of my beautiful Senpai, she seemed like she did not care about the attention and just walked to the claw game with my hand in her.
"There it is. Do you see that? The cute little guy! Can you do it?"
She let go of my hand as she pointed her finger at the little teddy bear at the center of all those prizes. Her eyes were glittering as she looked at the teddy bear, which I thought of it as light reflecting from her eyes.
"....it's not impossible."
It would be a little difficult but definitely not impossible. Technically, this claw game was built so that people would lose their money to it as much as they could. The claw was not really meant to hold the prizes. Simply put, it was a scam.
However, if you know the trick, you could literally win the prizes as long s you did it right.
Senpai put the money needed to play and I held the controller in my hand. It was not my first time playing this, so I was used to this kind of thing.
I moved the claw to the position around the teddy bear but a little less accurate coordinate. It was not really noticable but it was intentional. Then, I pushed the button to let the claw down and grabbed the teddy bear. If it was normally, the claw would not even be able to catch the teddy bear. The game was made to end like that.
However, what if I made it to catch three little teddy bear at the same time? One might fall, two might be a little slippery, but three were guaranteeing that the claw would not be able to cause them to fall. When three of the teddies were tossed into the prizes, Senpai immediately took and hugged them in her embrace. Her smile as she did that was simply very rewarding to me.
"Thank you, Kouhai-kun! As expected, you have really mastered this stuff!"
"....it's just luck."
It was not a lie though. I was lucky that the claw managed to hold the three of them without being faulty. If any case that the claw was faulty as well, I would never get to do it even if I used more than a hundred thousand yen.
"Now, on to the next one!"
"...there is still more to go?"
"Of course!"
"...fine."
I gave up. I would just let myself get pulled around by Senpai this time. She would not really listen to me anyway and I did not really have anything to do. Furthermore, it was not that bad of an activity to play with her.
One after another, the prizes we won piled up. Although I was the one who won some of them, Senpai also gained some of the prizes with her own skills especially the games which did not really scam people. I only won most games that were faulty though, something that people would waste most of their money for nothing.
The eyes of the people as they admired Senpai who actually won those games, they were really astounded by her behavior. Someone who had a prim and proper appearance like her would not really come to a place like this, so I understood their surprise. Moreover, the fact that we were winning one game after another with at least one prize from each game also made them look at us with bewilderment.
"... Senpai, isn't it time already? If we play anymore, we will not be able to bring all these to your home."
"Oh, that's true. Let's stop here then."
Fortunately, Senpai listened to me. We went out of the arcade with our hands full of various prizes we obtained from the arcade. We found a place to sit, so we took a rest there and Senpai called someone to take her home. She was a rich girl after all. I didn't really know what kind of rich girl she was even after all these years since I did neither ask or investigate about her. She also did not say anything about herself.
"By the way, Kouhai. Thank you for spending your time with me obediently. It has been so much fun today."
"....it's not like I can say no to you."
Sometimes, I wondered. Why did she call me Kouhai or Kouhai-kun instead of my name? She rarely called me Yozora every time she addressed me. My last name was something she never used even when we first met. What was the difference between Kouhai and Kouhai-kun anyway?
The way she addressed me was not significant but it really made me think about it.
"I have a question for you. You don't have to answer it if you don't want to."
"....what is it?"
Seeing her rare reluctant expression made me nervous for the first time in a while. Usually, this senior of mine would just ask without considering the time, place and occasion.
"....do you hate your family?"
.....a very difficult question she asked. My eyes became cloudy when she asked me that. Do I hate my family? Do I despise my mother, Miss Minamoto Harumi? Do I loathe my elder sister, Miss Minamoto Akari? I found myself in confusion when I thought about it. However, no matter how much I thought, I couldn't find an answer that seemed right to me. In the end, my mouth moved by itself as I spoke without thinking—
"I don't hate them....I think. But, they hate me. That's for sure."
Right, I didn't hate them. Neither did I love them. If they were in trouble, I would help them. I did not want to cause them trouble and I did not want them to feel troubled.
However, the fact that they hated me was true. I realized this long ago. Each and every one of those I knew, they told me that they hated me to my own face. My mother, my elder sister, my childhood friend, they all told me the same thing.
"I really hate you when you act like that person!"
"Why did you have to do that and embarrassed me!? I truly despise you for doing that despicable action!"
"Yozora-kun is a liar! I hate you!"
Those memories flooded my mind as I answered Senpai. It was supposed to be painful here in my chest, yet I felt empty when I remembered them. I could not feel anything at all when it was supposed to hurt.
"...I don't think they hate you."
"....no. They said it themselves that they hate me, Senpai. I heard it loud and clear."
Senpai tried to deny that fact. It was meaningless to deny it. In fact, I also wanted to deny it and make it just my imagination but when I saw how they treated me when they said it, I realized that those words were as true as it could ever be. It was correct to the point that the happy memories we had before were just lies.
"That was in the past, right? That doesn't mean they hate you now."
"Have you seen how Miss Minamoto talk to me, Senpai? Her speech was informal and harsh. Every time she speaks, she always seems to find wrongs in my actions. My mother, she still would not talk to me. When she sees my face at home, she makes a difficult face as if she doesn't want to deal with me. Aren't they all signifying the despise they have for—"
I tried to speak logically as I could. Nevertheless, I unintentionally stopped in my words when I took a look at Senpai's face. She had a sorrowful expression as she heard me. It was not the first time but not something I has seen ever since she consulted me about her family problems.
Did I say something hurtful to her? Was I being rude to her? Even after all the difficulty I experience, Senpai being sad was one of the things I would never want to see.
The Senpai who always had a smile on her face, sorrow was not an adjective for her.
"... Senpai? Did I say something hurtful to you?"
"...no. There's just dust in my eyes."
"...is that so...."
She lied to me. There was never a dust in her eyes. However, I did not want to force her to say why she seemed as if she wanted to cry. I was not her boyfriend or anything. In fact, what were we? Were we friends, or just strangers who knew each other? Or maybe we were just senior and junior?
Senpai's car had arrived. Someone who seemed or be her butler or something opened the door and welcomed her in as he took the prizes we had into the car. Senpai stood up and went to the car. Nonetheless, she stopped for a moment and took two teddy bears I won in the claw games we played when we entered the arcade and gave them to me. She made herself look cheerful as she said to me with a bright smile.
"Here are your rewards! One for you to have and the other is for you to give to someone else. I feel happy with just one teddy bear."
"...who do I give it to?"
"Anybody! Perhaps, your mother or Akari? Just give it to them as a present! And, Kouhai-kun?"
"...yeah?"
"Can you do me a favour?"
"...what is it?"
"Next time, please listen properly to what people around you say. Not those who believe the rumors but those who try to believe in you. At least, your elder sister and mother. Can you do it?"
".....I can't promise it but I'll think about it."
"Thank you. Then, go home safely okay? See you next time!"
Senpai waved her hand as she left me here with two teddy bears in my hands. I watched her leave with the car. Then, I thought of the favour she asked me.
Do I not listen to what they say all this time?
Those painful words from them, why did Senpai ask me to listen? She would not want me to listen to them if all I would hear was insult and criticizing. Miss Minamoto's words, why did she say that at least her or mother's words? Both of them did not really have anything good to say to me.
Did I really pay attention to what they wanted to say all this time...?
I felt something in my mind pushing that thought away from me. As if there was a huge wall holding me back from reaching the thought of them ever accepting me as family, I could never think of that. I could only think of how they hated me. That was all I could do. It hurt my head whenever I tried to think about it.
The sun almost set now. I should go home. If I don't, Miss Minamoto at home would not be worried but troubled if anyone ever reported that I was still roaming around like I was not allowed to return. They would be bothered if the eyes of society saw them like that.
However, if I comprehended it in a different way, as long as people don't see me walking around, they would not be troubled at all.
I put the two teddy bears in my bag and headed home. The destination was not far but it still took quite some time to arrive. Before I even walked for a quarter of the distance, my phone rang. A name appeared on the screen as I picked up the call.
—Hello, Yozora-kun. Am I bothering you right now?
"....hello, what is it?"
A man's voice spoke from the other side of the phone. From the way he was talking to me, he was someone I knew. I did not exactly remember from when we knew each other but he was someone like my employer, I guess?
—I kind of need your help today. It's emergency, but can you help me out? I'll properly compensate you.
".....what do I need to do?"
—For now, come to my house and I'll explain.
"...fine, I'll arrive in about fifteen minutes."
—Thanks.
"...I'll hang up."
Aikawa Daisuke, I called him Mister Aikawa. He was an author who wrote a variety of novels. Light novels, psychological novels and research novels. He primarily wrote light novels though and was quite popular. He had a pretty good income being a novelist. From what I heard, his novels had become the bestseller for more than once.
What was my relation with him? I was one of his editor and something like his helper. Providing advice and checking errors in his works were my job. Well, due to that, we had to meet sometimes and he treated me quite well and always paid for foods whenever we go out to discuss about his works.
Being an editor at my age was not something usual, but he hired me and paid me well enough. Furthermore, since I was finding some jobs to make money myself, his offer was enticing.
Well, it was not the first time he had asked me to come over his place for help. But, this late in the evening was rare. Probably the first time.
Since I had the reason to return late, I would just go to Mister Aikawa's place to help him out in whatever he was in trouble. Miss Minamoto would not be worried about me so that would not be a problem.
I did not take any transportation and only walked there since I had memorized the paths I needed to take. A few shortcuts along the way and found it. The house of Mister Aikawa. I rang the bell once and waited for him to come out, which did not take even ten seconds.
With a messy appearance and unkempt face that only I knew, Mister Aikawa opened the door and greeted me.
"Sorry for showing this messy appearance of mine."
"....it's fine, I'm used to it already."
That was right. The popular Mister Aikawa Daisuke was just a man in his thirties who could not even take care of himself well.