XXXVII
Manga: Lesson 17
Anime: Jump Festa 2005
SHIZUKU has been thinking about it for a while.
Why can't the Yorozuya be friends with the Shinsengumi?
Everywhere they went, everywhere they met, whether it was on the streets running after the same person for the same purpose, they will always, always find a way to bicker with each other – and most of the time, the person they're chasing will get away and it will always be up to Kusahara to catch them. No matter the reason may be, they will always get at each other's throats for even the smallest of things for every given moment.
One time, they even tried to fight over who has the best hair color, of all things.
So, to at least make them friends for only an hour or two, Shizuku thought of a brilliant idea.
Not even three minutes into the implementation of her plan, she's already regretting what she had done.
"I told you this was a bad idea." Kusahara whispered to her when the girl sagged down on the mat that she was standing on. "You know better than anyone that they will never get along. It's basically who they are."
"I know." Shizuku sighed heavily as he looked around her. "This was stupid. I was stupid."
There were cherry blossoms that were in full bloom around them as wind blew its petals away from its branches, creating a wonderful show of flowers blowing everywhere. However, irritatingly enough, the calm ambiance of the area was slowly getting destroyed as the chaotic scene of the two groups that Shizuku has been trying hard to reconcile were bickering in the middle of the whole area. By that point, only they were there and everyone else either relocated their mats or disappeared from the area completely.
"Oi, oi, what does the noisy lot want now?" Gintoki asked from his spot with the Yorozuya as he glared up at Hijikata and the Shinsengumi. "Are you guys picking mushrooms?"
"Go find another spot." Hijikata replied, tucking an arm inside his dark kimono as he sneered at the white haired male. "That spot is the Shinsengumi's exclusive flower viewing spot every year. It's even more special this year because Shizuku's with us. We have orders."
"What the hell do you mean you have orders?" Gintoki asked with a raised brow.
"If you forgot, ever since what happened a few chapters ago, we have been given explicit orders to look after Shizuku. She is in our care now and we have to take care of her and it makes us liable for anything happening to her when she's out of the Station. So, get out. She likes this spot and you're in it." Hijikata replied.
"I don't recall allowing Shizuku to be with you lot."
"You're not her father and you are not related to her. Kusahara being in the force makes us responsible and takes her under our protection."
Gintoki scoffed. "I could protect her more effectively than you could ever do. Always did and always will."
"We don't care what you think you can do, Yorozuya. Now, get out." Hijikata sneered.
"But why, though? It's not your spot. Isn't it the same where you ever sit? Or are you the low-life police officer twenty-four hours a day?"
"It's not the same. From that place, you have a special view of the cherry blossom petals. Right, guys?"
"Well, for me, I don't really care. As long as we can drink and be with Shizuku-chan, anywhere is fine." One of the officers answered from behind, not meeting Hijikata's eyes.
"I don't really mind if it's from above of from below." Another replied from the side.
"If it's for the sake's sake, I could even be like a flower growing on asphalt. Just as long as I can shove alcohol down the younger Kusahara's throat and watch her suffer and get intoxicated." Okita nonchalantly said.
"Alright, shut up!" Hijikata suddenly yelled, startling Shizuku a little as she slightly jumped in her spot. "To be honest, I don't really care, either! What pisses me off is that we have to change places because of them and I know Shizuku wouldn't join us!"
"You know you can sit next to them and I can sit in the middle, right?" Shizuku asked out loud as she tilted her head to the side. "It's not like I'm going anywhere. We're literally in the same place."
"No, no way!" Hijikata replied as he pulled out his phone and started pointing at it. "Matsudaira-totsan told us to not let you out of our sight and so we're not going let you out of our sight! That's that! End of story!"
Shizuku sighed again and leaned back until she was leaning against Kusahara's back. By that point, Hijikata was now having a (very loud) verbal fight with Gintoki, who seemed to not care at all for what was happening.
"This will end very badly." The teal haired girl sighed.
"You think?" Kusahara asked, sarcasm evident in his voice.
Shizuku groaned. It was stupid thinking that she could get the two groups to work together. It had been her idea to bring them there in the first place – Tae joined and was also there because why not? Honestly, Shizuku's just trying to distract herself from watching the older girl beat Kondou up on the side.
Shizuku even prepared a little something for the food and entertainment of the two parties but by that point, she knew that they will just end up destroying food – and eventually the whole area – if they were to get together just to look at what Shizuku brought. She thought that she could get away with letting the Yorozuya sit beside the Shinsengumi but in retrospect, she knew that she was never going to be successful in going through a whole day with the two groups beside her. It will be a matter of time before someone actually passes out from a fight – Kondou was already on the verge of that.
Really, Shizuku's tired of being the person always in the middle of things.
She just can't pick a side no matter how hard she tried.
"This might not be one of your best ideas, Shizuku." Kusahara suddenly piped from behind her before he chuckled. "You don't have many bad ideas so this is kind of new."
"Don't remind me." Shizuku sighed. By that point, Hijikata started to direct his anger towards Yamazaki – who was calmly playing badminton before he started running away from the younger male.
"Well, that's the gist of it." Kondou said as he arose from his dead state from the ground, his wounds dark on his face. He probably woke up to calm the area. "It's our yearly function here. We can't move from here. We'll take it with only Otae-san left behind."
"No, we'll need her to disappear as well." Hijikata replied as he magically appeared out of nowhere – Shizuku knew that Yamazaki was writhing somewhere in the scene but she's preventing herself from looking his way (it's mean, she knew, but if one doesn't see it, one doesn't really know if it was there or not, right?). "Only Shizuku gets to stay. Kusahara's a given."
"What are you deciding off on your own?" Gintoki suddenly asked as he stood from his spot, his face looking angry, but his eyes still looking dead as always. "I don't know anything of being the Shogunate's vassal or something like that. If you want to move us, come at us with a bulldozer or something."
"Come at us with a dozen of Haagen-Dasz." Tae added with a sneer.
"Come with the skin of fried chickens." Kagura said as she crossed her arms over her chest.
Sadaharu suddenly began to growl.
Shinpachi blinked.
Kusahara sighed.
Shizuku.... Well, Shizuku just stared, already tired.
"Well, that's interesting." Hijikata chuckled as he stood with the Shinsengumi. "You'll go against the Shogunate? It seems that this year, instead of watching the cherry blossom petals fall, we'll see blood fly."
By that point, Shizuku was already dialing a number she knew by heart on her phone – Kusahara got her one because of the no communication thing that happened during only a few weeks ago with the baby and everything (and also just in case because why not?) – before placing it near her ear. The receiver picked up by the second ring.
"Elo, Matsudaira here."
"Matsudaira-san, can you give me permission to slaughter about forty people at once?" Shizuku asked as she nonchalantly looked at the group having a showdown in the middle of the area.
"Please don't give her permission to do that." Kusahara piped from behind her, sounding like he was eating something – mochi, probably. "I know I'm going to be the one to do all the cleanup and quite frankly, I don't want to clean anything that involves Shizuku going on a rampage. It's hard to get stains out, you know. I'd rather enjoy the rare time I actually get to relax."
"I'll be clean." Shizuku immediately retorted with a slight shine in her eyes. "And I'll be fast, I promise. I can dump them in the ocean. Just close of the docks for now."
"Who exactly are we talking about here?" Matsudaira asked from the other side of the phone, sounding openly amused at the idea of Shizuku killing people. "If I'm going to be involved, then it's alright for me. Is it Kondou and the others? Should I come over with a video camera?"
"Yeah, it's them." The teal haired girl sighed. "They're doing stupid things again."
"They're stupid, Shizuku. What do you expect? You know that you're sometimes like that too."
"Oh, I know. That's why I hate it."
"Now, now, don't be like that." Matsudaira laughed loudly from the other side. Honestly, by that point, Shizuku didn't know why she even bothered to call the older.
"So, what are you doing?" the old man asked.
"We were supposed to be peacefully watching the cherry blossoms and by this point, we should already be eating and the adults should already be getting shitfaced drunk." The younger replied with an airy sigh. "But things didn't go too well and I'm afraid that the day might be ruined. Dealing with drunk people is better than this."
"Or, it could go alright." Kusahara piped from behind her, sounding like he just came up with a great idea. "You know, we can play games and save the day. We can tell them it's a game to win back the spot. That's what they're fighting for, anyways. We can at least be civil and entertaining with it."
An idea suddenly came into Shizuku's mind and it involves playing games just as Kusahara said.
"You know what? Yeah, that could work." She said as she looked over her shoulder and looked at the back of the older male's head. "I can't believe I haven't thought about that before!"
"Oi, what are you guys talking about?" Matsudaira suddenly called from the phone that Shizuku was holding.
"Opps, sorry, Matsudaira-san. I forgot that you were still there." The girl sheepishly replied with a chuckle.
"How harsh. Am I that easily forgotten?" Matsudaira asked and by the sounds of it, he was pouting. "Fine, I'm just a minor character, anyways."
Shizuku was quick to reply. "No, no!" she said and began to chuckle again. "Just...... It's nothing. Don't worry about it, Matsudaira-san. And yes, you are just a minor character, but that's in the original. In this story, you're kind of a big deal."
"Oh, I know." There was a breathy sigh from the other side of the phone and a little while later, Matsudaira spoke again after a short chuckle. "Well, if that's all you wanted to say, enjoy the flower viewing, alright? Relax for a bit. It's one of the few times that you guys get to relax." He said, sounding like he was smiling a little.
"Just let them fight each other and record it. Send it to me later and I'll post it online and laugh about it to Sho-chan."
With that, the Chief-of-Police hang up and Shizuku pulled her phone away from her ear and looked at the screen, watching as the call interface disappeared.
"Why did I call him again?" Shizuku suddenly asked.
"I don't know, either." Kusahara replied from behind her. "But you have to admit, every time he's here, everything just gets funnier. His voice alone is a comedic element."
"Well, that's true." The girl replied and stood up and began dusting herself off with her hands. "Are you planning on drinking today?" she asked without looking at the older.
"I might." Kusahara shrugged. "But I don't really want to get drunk. So only a little, probably."
Shizuku chuckled.
"Oh, Hijikata-san's pulling out his katana."
At Kusahara's sudden statement, Shizuku immediately turned at her heel and bolted, immediately appearing in front of Hijikata and holding on the hilt of his katana to prevent him from pulling it out any further.
Admittedly, that might've just worsened the situation.
Shizuku ignored the intense stare and pressure that he was getting from the pair of not so dead fish eyes from behind her.
"No bloodbaths here on this perfect day, Hijikata-san." The girl said, refusing to turn around to meet Gintoki's staring eyes. "Seriously, you can't just go running around doing what you want because you have a blade."
"When have I did that ever, Shizuku?" the dark haired male asked with a raised brow.
"Just right now." The younger nonchalantly replied.
"Hold up."
Shizuku and Hijikata suddenly looked at the side where Okita spoke from.
"I can't let you disturb the others with your swordfight and with your disgusting flirting." The brunet continued with a nonchalant look on his face.
"It's funny that you even called that flirting." Kusahara commented from the back, his voice amused.
"Nori-san, please don't encourage him."
"Kusahara, shut up."
The teal haired male laughed loudly and didn't speak again.
"Let's settle this the flower viewing way." Okita then continued and suddenly pulled out a helmet and a squeaky hammer from out of nowhere.
"First game: The great and authentic hit-and-cover rock paper scissors showdown!"
"That has nothing to do with flower viewing!" The Yorozuya and the Shinsengumi collectively shouted at the brunet officer.
Shizuku just sighed. "Well, at least we get to settle who gets the spot, right?" she asked with a smile, slightly grateful that she and Okita had the same idea in mind – though admittedly, the girl was thinking of other games other than the hit-and-cover game, but it was probably enough to break up the possible bloodbath that will happen between the two groups.
After the officers laid a large mat on the ground so that there will be a lot of space for the competition, all three chosen competitors from both sides kneeled down in front of their respective opponents. On the Shinsengumi's side, Kondou, Hijikata and Okita sat in order and on the Yorozuya's side, Tae, Gintoki and Kagura sat respectively in front of the other three.
On the side of Kondou and Tae, Shinpachi and Yamazaki stood, and on the side of Okita and Kagura, Shizuku and Kusahara stood.
"Go, Kyoukuchou!"
"Die, Fukuchou!"
"Who just said 'die' right now?! I'll make you commit seppuku!"
"The showdown shall be between the travelers and the representatives. The outcome shall be decided in three rounds." Yamazaki said, introducing the teams. "The veterans and witnesses shall be both Shinpachi-kun from the travelers' side and I, Yamazaki, from the representatives."
Yamazaki and Shinpachi bowed at the same time.
"And the referees will be me, Shizuku, and Nori-san." Shizuku continued as she and Kusahara bowed.
"The side that wins gets the right to view flowers, plus gets to have Otae-san and Shizuku-chan."
"What's up with that sudden rule?!" Shinpachi suddenly shouted. "Are you some bandit?! If that's how it is, winning or losing won't result in any gain for us!"
"Okay, you'll get a Shinsengumi sausage as a plus, then." Yamazaki replied as he pulled out a sausage from the back pocket of his pants. "I found it in our fridge."
"Please tell me that hasn't been to where I thought it has been to." Shizuku sighed as she pinched the bridge of her nose.
"I'm not saying anything." Kusahara replied but the younger girl could practically hear the smirk in his voice as he said those words.
"I'm going to pretend I didn't hear anything, then."
"Again, I'm not saying anything."
Shizuku sighed.
Kusahara only chuckled.
"And now, we have the first round!" the younger said to distract herself and looked at the pair at the other end of the area. "Kondou-san versus Ane-san."
"Ane-ue, please take it easy." Shinpachi said as he attempted to go near his sister. "I can take your place, if you want."
"No, if I don't do it, there's no real meaning to it." Tae replied without looking at the younger. "No matter what I do, he always comes back."
Shizuku raised a brow.
"I'm annoyed by him." Tae continued. "I'll go and end everything."
Shizuku flinched.
"Oh, no." she muttered. "I have a bad feeling about this."
"I'll go get the first aid kit." Kusahara immediately turned on his heel and walked away.
"Well then, rock paper scissors..." Shizuku started as she raised her hand in the air.
"Fight!"
Tae pulled out a paper.
Kondou pulled out a rock.
"And I'm safe!" the older said as he pulled the helmet on top of his head.
"You're not safe! Run away, Kondou-san!" Shinpachi yelled in warning but the older didn't seem to hear it because of the darkened aura that was suddenly appearing in front of him.
Tae stood on the table and held the squeaky hammer up above her head as she began to chant darkly.
"Let the Heavens' wrath descend to eliminate the monsters...."
Tae sharply brought the hammer down.
Shinpachi closed his eyes shut.
Yamazaki stared with wide eyes.
Kondou feared for his life.
Shizuku sighed.
Kusahara came back with a first aid kit.
"By ignoring the rules, the first round is forfeited." Shizuku said as she raised her hand to signal the end of the game. "No one wins." Completely ignoring the fuss that the officers were doing with their unconscious Chief – she could tell that Kusahara was doing the same act of ignoring everyone else as he tended to Kondou – the girl turned towards the next pair.
To her surprise, the next pair, Okita and Kagura, were already going at it with god-like speed.
"Wow, amazing." She muttered, for the first time in a long time, at a loss for words. "They're fast. It makes it seem like they both have the helmet and the hammer."
"Oh? She's on par with Sougo." Hijikata commented from his spot on the mat next to Gintoki. Shizuku perked her ears up to hear the conversation better as her eyes remained on the fighting pair in the middle of the mat. "What's that girl? That guy has an empty head, but he's one of the most skilled in the Shinsengumi."
"Equal?' Gintoki replied with a smug look on his face. "You think a mere human can defeat our Kagura? She's a member of the endangered war race of the universe, the Yato Clan. It's amazing, isn't it?"
"What are you saying? Our Sougo is-,"
"Our Kagura is-,"
Shizuku chuckled as she watched the bicker while taking gulps of sake in between heated comebacks.
"It's not even your turn yet and you're already getting drunk." She said with another laugh before turning to face the fighting pair. By that point, she wasn't even surprised to see the two of them actually fighting with their fists, instead of sticking to the actual game.
"Wasn't it Okita-kun who suggested this game?" Kusahara suddenly asked as he came to stand next to Shizuku.
"He was." The girl answered with a nod and chuckle. "He really seems to be into it, though." She said as she pointed at the brunet. "I mean, just look at him."
"Well, it is Kagura-chan." Kusahara sighed as he sat cross-legged on the mat. "But I'd say that this round is also forfeited. Actual fist fights isn't included, right?"
"Yeah." The younger nodded. "It'll be up to the final pair."
Suddenly, the older pulled out his phone from his pocket and began doing something on it.
"What are you doing?' Shizuku asked with a curious tilt of her head.
"Just wait and see. This will be fun." Kusahara grinned and Shizuku knew better than to question that grin.
It meant that the older was going to do something that will get him into a lot of trouble but it was evident that he didn't really care. Shizuku doesn't really know if she likes that about him. Kusahara has always been like that. Him being reckless and taking every opportunity to get something out from someone was one of the few traits that he maintained from their first meeting.
He did use to be an asshole.
He mainly still is, but he toned down over the years.
What came next just proved that he really still is one.
"Look over here, Hijikata-san." Kusahara said in a teasing voice as he recorded Hijikata puke all over the ground. Right beside him, Gintoki was doing the same. "You too, Gintoki-san. Look over here, please, so I can record your faces!"
"Nori-san, what are you planning on those videos?" Shizuku asked with a raised brow. Deep inside, she was actually trying her best to keep her laughter in because she has to admit, the two looked funny with how they were getting shitfaced drunk at the moment.
"I don't know." Kusahara answered with a shrug before looking at the sky. "Blackmail?"
Shizuku shook her head with a sigh. "Okita-san would be proud of you if he wasn't occupied with Kagura-chan." The brunet was currently walking over towards the corner of the group as he continued on to have a brawl with Kagura. Shizuku debated with herself whether or not she would go over there to break up the fight but eventually, she decided against it – she figured that the two of them wouldn't actually kill each other anyways – and just walked away to watch the process of the third match.
For the next moments, Kusahara's laughter was heard around the area as he recorded Hijikata and Gintoki drunkenly try to kill each other with real swords – Yamazaki stupidly obeyed Hijikata's drunken comment of giving Gintoki a real katana. Shizuku was there to basically mediate the fight to prevent them from actually killing each other and she was there the make sure the others wouldn't get hit, either.
At one point, she actually hit Hijikata in the head because he was playing rock paper scissors with Sadaharu and kept yelling at the dog for always pulling out a rock.
"Hijikata-san! Gin-san's over there!"
"No, he's not! He's here! He's pulling out a rock every time! That has to be some kind of cheating!"
"Not it's not! And Gin-san! Stop staring at a bamboo stick!"
"No, it's that V-shaped bangs bastard, can't you see?!"
"It's not!"
After a long – and agonizing – third round, Shizuku managed to steal Hijikata's and Gintoki's swords from their hands and throw them to the side, successfully disarming them and preventing them from hurting anyone else and themselves.
Shizuku just left them there to play rock paper scissors with a tree branch while she and Kusahara went over to the rest of the officers and Shinpachi.
"Oi, so you were here?"
At the familiar voice, Shizku turned around and saw Otose standing there with Catherine right beside her. The older was holding a bottle of sake and the Amanto was holding a large bundle of food in her arms.
"I made some bento before coming." Catherine said as she laid the bundle on the mat.
Shizuku and the others fully accepted the two and let them join them. To her surprise, the other officers accepted them too and began chatting with them on full force.
The day was spent with just talking and watching the flowers.
Minutes turned into hours with Kagura and Okita still fighting in the background, Kondou still lying unconscious behind them all, Yamazaki playing badminton at the back and Hijikata and Gintoki still running around playing rock paper scissors with an actual rock, paper and scissors.
Shizuku couldn't help but smile at the sight. It was nice watching all of them with what they were doing in their own corners.
"It's been a while since I've seen you smile like that." Kusahara's voice suddenly came from behind the girl as she sat by the tree near the corner of the mats. A second later, the older was sitting next to her with his back against the tree bark. Shizuku didn't need to turn to know that the older was nursing a cup of sake.
"Well, it's been a while since I've been at peace like this." The girl said with a soft chuckle. "It would be nice if this would last longer."
"That's true." Kusahara hummed softly.
"Nori-san." Shizuku suddenly called with a soft voice as her eyes continued to watch over everyone.
"What is it?" the older asked, as if sensing Shizuku's difference in tone. "You alright?"
"I'm fine." The girl replied with a sigh. "It's just that... Do you think we'll have another moment like this? When everything is just this calm and we're just talking to each other like normal people?"
There was silence. The sound of the wind rushed past Shizuku with the sounds of the voices of the people she was watching. Kusahara broke the calm silence with a soft chuckle.
"You know, it's been a while since I've heard that tone on you, too." He said as Shizuku felt fingers run through her hair from the back.
"Don't worry, we'll have a lot of moments like this in the future." The older said with a reassuring tone in his voice. Shizuku immediately felt relived.
"I'll make sure of it. But for now, let's enjoy the moment, alright?"
Shizuku smiled.
"Alright."
When night came, Gintoki suddenly woke up and found his head stuck inside a vending machine.
How he got there, he doesn't completely know.
How Hijikata managed to get his head stuck inside a trashcan right beside the vending machine that served as Gintoki's temporary helmet, he doesn't know, either.
"Where am I? Where is this? Shizuku? SHIZUKU?!"
"Do you think they already woke up?"
"Maybe. I'm not going out there to pick them up."
"I'm not going out, either."
"Nori-san, you're literally the only one in the officers who's not shitfaced drunk right now, do you think you have the right to refuse the responsibility?"
"I could just ditch them."
"... You didn't change at all, didn't you?"
"Look who's talking, Shizuku. Look who's talking."
"Oh, shut up and get those two."
"Yes, ma'am."
*^*
Voting for the POPULARITY POLL ARCS and for QUESTIONS and REQUESTS, check comments.
I commented here.
Thanks!