Dream
I hate Thursdays. They're not Fridays, but they're close enough to the weekend that you can't be moody about the weekend being far away.
Its just a pain altogether.
Class seems to fly by though. Yet since we have a long history paper due on Friday, the library is stacked. Meaning we have to resort to our common room.
This is also the first time George has heard anything about a common room.
"None of you ever told me anything about a common room" George insists for what I feel is the thirteenth time.
Frankly, I'm quite shocked he didn't know about it.
Its just at the end of our hallway, a small cosy room, that has a couple bookshelfs and couches. Nothing special.
"I swear I told you about it" Sapnap says.
George shakes his head. "I would've remembered it" he tells us, his shoulder banging into mine as we walk. Its nice.
"Ive barely gotten any of this paper written" Quackity complains, walking ahead of us in a rush to get to the end of the hall, "I'm gonna fail, and I can't fail an-"
"You do this every time" I console.
George looks up, startled, which I notice he has a habit of doing. Any time I speak he always pays attention, looking a little shocked.
Maybe its because of how scarcely I used to speak around him, compared to now, when I don't mind him hearing things I have to say, whereas I used to hate even having to look at him.
"You say you're gonna fail, and then you'll score higher then half the people in the class" I shrug, "stop worrying."
"Thats easy for you to say" he shoots back.
"He has a point" Sapnap agrees.
We reach the common room doors, and find a little secluded corner of the room to work in.
Quackity, who is still muttering to himself like a panicked little stress ball, throws himself down onto the floor in the corner, not bothering to find a table, which results in all of us just sitting on the floor.
Quackity spreads out his books and immediately leans over pages upon pages of work.
Sapnap sits himself upon a pillar nearby and takes to nudging George constantly with his foot.
I sit closer to Quackity, knowing he'll probably ask for my help in a minute or two, and George sits cross legged just in front of me and Quackity, just in reach for Sapnap to keep kicking at him.
"Wheres your homework?" I ask Sapnap. He looks up.
"Well, wheres yours?"
"I asked first."
"Answer my quest-"
"Not right now" Q groans, "please just give me five minutes of peace or go sit on the couches and leave me be."
Im not done talking, so I sit up and lead us away from Quackity and to the couches. Sapnap lays his head in my lap, and George sits himself on the opposite end of the couch, still crosslegged.
Sapnap grins up at me, his hair flopping backwards. "Well? Where is it" I ask.
He rolls his eyes. "None of its due until Monday, I'll do it this weekend" he smiles.
Now its my turn to scoff. "Like Quackity, you say that every time, you aren't gonna get it done" I shoot. "You should just do it now."
"God, you need to loosen up a little" he says, still smiling as he pulls a little at threads on my sweater. I slap him playfully on the head.
"Why don't you question George like that?" Sapnap asks. I lay my hand on his hair and look up at George.
"I saw him doing his during lunch" I answer simply, not thinking about it.
Sapnap raises an eyebrow. "He couldn't of done it all at lunch" he contradicts.
Im on my toes, knowing Sapnap would say so.
"No, I saw him doing the rest in Maths after he'd finished his questions early."
Sapnap raises an eyebrow and lifts his head to look down at George.
I do the same, and George is looking back and forth between us when he answers with "hes right."
I can tell Sapnap wants to question further, but for some reason he holds off, just laying his head back down without another word.
"What?" I ask.
Sapnap shakes his head. "Nothing." I stare at him, but he doesn't say anything else. Weird for him.
"Ive been meaning to ask you both, something, actually" George shoots up suddenly, "when do we finish up for Christmas?"
I stare incredously at him.
"Christmas? As much as I hate to admit it, thats a little while away" I tell him. "Why do you ask?"
"Well" he starts, twiddling his fingers around, "I guess I was just curious."
Before I can say anything else, Quackity cuts in from across the room. "Hes lying."
Both Sapnap and I, (Sapnap sitting up from my lap) turn to look at Quackity. "What?" we chorus.
"Hes lying" Q states simply, "he always moves his fingers around a lot when he lies."
Now we both turn to look at George, like some sort of looking game of ping pong.
He looks back for a minute with a straight face, before finally caving and making some mix of a 'tsk' and an 'ugh' noise all at once.
"I forgot the dates and im not staying here for Christmas" he mumbles.
I can tell he wants to say something else, but hes interrupted by the sudden uproar from Quackity and Sapnap.
"What do you mean you aren't staying?!"
"Where are you going?"
"You know you can stay, right?"
"You can't leave!"
"What do you mean, you aren't staying?!"
"Shut up!" George snaps at the two of them.
Quackitys now ditched his scattered books and is slumped on the floor infront of the couch.
"Ill be back right after the new year" George says calmly, "and I'm going to Rome."
I gawp at him. "Rome? You're spending Christmas in Rome?" I ask.
He smiles. "You look jealous"
Theres a small dose of playfulness in his tone that makes me shift excitedly on the couch.
"Im more jealous of you right now then I've ever been of anybody else in my entire life."
"Watch it" Sapnap says angrily, slapping my leg that moved his head.
"What brings you to Rome?" Quackity asks. Thats something Id like to know too.
But again, George shrugs. "Dunno, you'd have to ask my dad" he tells us.
'Rome' is all I can keep thinking to myself. I can hardly believe my ears, honestly.
And here he is sat infront of me like it was an every day occurence that one goes to Rome.
Yet then I again I suppose it is for him. Didn't he say he has a house there?
***
On Fridays we only have four classes instead of six, which always feels like relief after a long week.
Sapnap and I are taking the long way around to math after Sapnap consistently complained about being too early to class to the point where I decide to walk with him just to shut him up.
Im completley ignoring everything he says just out spite, and are instead thinking about if I read after school today, before bed tonight and when I wake up tommorow, I should be able to finish my current book.
Its okay outside today. Cold, very cold, but dry.
The clouds overhead are very dark, and are clearly threatening rain, but as for now the day remains untouched by bad weather. Even Sapnap has a jacket on.
Im trying to figure out if we're actually now late for class when Sapnap snaps his fingers in front of me. I swat at his hands.
"Don't do that" I hiss.
"Are you even listening to me?" he asks, pushing open a door which leads us through to what I recognize as the back of the school.
I answer honestly. "No, not really"
He throws his head back in a pained way, as if the last thing in the world he wanted to be doing was repeating what he had already said.
"The Christmas party is meant to be next weekend, in the right wing across the grounds" he explains.
This sparks little interest in me. Sapnap and Quackity were known for going out when they were around fifteen.
At one stage im pretty sure they were both suspended for being caught, (drunk) trying to bake in the kitchens at half four in the morning.
Sapnaps mom actually showed up to the school for that one, and Quackity hasn't let him forget it since.
After they turned sixteen, and then seventeen, (which Sapnap just turned) they've chilled out. But that doesn't mean they still don't go out every once in a while.
"And why are you telling me this?" I ask.
"Well, I thought you might wanna come too."
At this, I laugh. "Okay, and I'm actually engaged to Tom Cruise"
He actually stops and turns to stare at me, looking completely bewildered. "What?"
"I thought we were listing things that are never going to happen" I shrug. Sapnap rolls his eyes and shoves me on the shoulder before we continue off down the hallway.
"Be serious" Sapnap says, "come with us, I bet you'll enjoy yourself, and it'll be right after exams and it'll be a nice way to unwind, you're so uptight nowa-"
"You're rambling" I notify him.
He doesn't notice me. "Come on, Dream, please?" he asks, his hands pressed together, "for me? Please?"
We're on our classrooms corridor. "I'll think about it" I tell him, knowing damn well I won't be going anywhere.
He flashes me a quick grin before we're pushed into our seats by an angry looking teacher, gaining inquisitve looks from both George and Quackity that say 'where were you two?'
Maths is a pain, like always.
Its boring and pointless in my opinion, but I get through it all the same. Instead of heading to the library to work, for some reason we end up in mine and Sapnaps dorm.
Sapnap and Q sit themselves down where we'd normally sit, but spread their books out quite largely on the floor.
So I resort to sitting at my desk, and suprisingly enough, George sits with me.
We've only been working for about a half an hour when Sapnap breaks out into a panic about a ring he thinks he's lost.
He and Quackity begin re tracing their steps, and within minutes the two of them are gone from the room, shouting something about it being by the swings.
I think thats what it was anyway, I didn't really pay attention.
I don't look up. George nods merely, barely looking up from his books.
After a couple more minutes of silence, the only noise in the room coming from the scratch of Georges pencil and the drawl of my pen, he sighs, leaning back in his chair.
I look up. "Whats wrong?"
He just shakes his head. "My minds, just" he tries to explain, "not working properly, I need a fag."
I nearly drop my pen altogether just out of shock. "A what?"
He pushes his chair out from behind him, the wood scratching nosily.
I watch him fish around in his back pockets. He turns back to look at me. "Coming?"
"Where?" I ask, still not able to comprehend whats happening.
He looks at me like im an idiot. "Im going outside.. to smoke" he says slowly, "are you coming?"
Then I do feel like an idiot. "Oh!" I nod, grasping what everything means, "you mean cigarettes"
Now he looks really confused. "Yes, I mean cigarettes" he laughs as I stand up.
"I didn't know you smoke" I say as we walk down the hall.
"I don't" he shrugs, "well, at least not a lot."
It doesn't seem like something he wants to get into, so I try to sneakily change the subject.
We make very small talk about todays classes whilst heading down the stairs and around the back of the building, where you can't really see unless you try to look.
George sits himself against the wall, his legs crossed. I watch him pull out a small silver boxed lighter and a small half empty pack of cigarettes, before he lights one and sets it between his lips whilst he puts the pack away.
But then he looks back up at me. "Want one?" he asks, his words coming out muffled because of the thin paper between his lips.
See now if anybody else were sat before me and asked this exact same question, Id say no.
But this boy seems to have worked wonders upon me.
"Sure" I shrug.
I sit down in front of him and take the cigarette, putting it in my mouth. He cups his hand around my mouth whilst he lights it, taking consideration of the soft breeze.
Ive only smoked a couple times before, and most times it was with Sapnap. Id been careful not to get into a habit of it, but all of that seemed to slip from mind once George had asked me if I wanted one.
He tips the ash off the end of his cigarette and we sit silently, the smell of tobacco wafting away with the cool wind.
I sit back a little, just when George asks, "do any of you drink?"
His question suprises me. "Sapnap and Q really only do at parties, but I keep Scotch in my bedside drawer."
He chuckles, smoke flowing steadily from his mouth, his lips slightly parted. "What, are you an alcoholic or something?"
I laugh too. "No, sometimes it helps with sleep."
"Go grab it, we'll have a quick drink and get our work done quicker" he urges, the cigarette going to and fro between his mouth and fingers.
I look at him. "You want me to go get it?" I ask incredulously.
He nods, and again, for some reason, I do as he says.
"Ill be back in a minute" I tell him, making my way back to our downstairs doors as I puff on the ends of the cigarette, finding myself not really caring if somebody sees.
Sapnap and Quackity still aren't back, so Im able to quickly snatch up the bottle along with some Vodka I know Sapnap has stored under his matress for special occasions, before I slip from the room.
The halls are rather empty, looking at how late its growing and considering a lot of people go to town on Fridays.
Im glad, I didn't want anybody to stop me and ask about the sound of sloshing and glass clinking coming from my jacket pocket.
George is still where I left him, leaning carelessly against the wall.
His mouth spirals into a wild smirk when he sees me coming. I slip the bottles from my pockets and drop them in front of him.
He picks up the Vodka and turns it over in his hands. "Whos is this?"
"Sapnaps" I answer simply.
He unscrews the cap. "Will he care that we took it?"
I shake my head, "He wont even notice its gone" I assure him.
Thats all the assurance he seems to need, because within the next five seconds hes taken a long hard gulp from the bottle.
I wait expectantly for him to cough, or remark about the burn, but he just screws the cap back on and leans the bottle against the wall.
I take my Scotch and sip on it, passing it between him and I whilst we talk. Sometimes George would stop drinking for a couple minutes or so, just to smoke.
After im not even sure how long, the sky grows darker, and the only light source is coming from the windows a couple yards behind us.
Each time George would slip out the smoke from his cigrarettes, the smoke would linger around his slim face, before dispersing off into the air.
The more I drink, the more I start to note in my head about how pointed his chin really is, and how his cheekbones really stick out a lot more when he puffs on his cigarette, and how rounded the top of his nose is, and how red his lips have gone from the cold...
The scotch taste starts to make me feel sick after a while, so I take the Vodka instead.
It burns each time I drink, but after a little I start to like the burn. It feels bittersweet.
Im laid back over the grass. Its damp, but right now im finding it hard to care about anything.
We've been throwing questions back and forth for about an hour now, and the empty Scotch and only a quarter left Vodka bottles lay beside George.
"Rome should be fun" I mumble randomly, after things go a little too quiet.
To my suprise, I hear George scoff condescendingly.
I don't know why, but this makes me laugh.
Which makes him start to laugh, and then we spend the next five minutes losing it over absolutely nothing.
Theres no denying how drunk the two of us are at this point.
"If I could have things my way" George slurs slowly, "Id be staying here"
My head hurts. "Why don't you stay, then" I ask him.
George laughs again, but this time more sadly. I sit still and wait for him to say something.
"Wouldn't be allowed, I s'pose" he mumbles.
I can see him poking uncertainly at one of his knuckles. "Don't want to cause a fight, better to just comply."
He looks upset, really upset. His gaze has drooped, and his voice has gone all quiet, like he doesn't feel like talking about it. I sit up, across from him again.
"Rome itself is meant to be beautiful" I say, my mind spinning.
I barely even know what im saying, but hes listening. I can tell hes listening.
When he doesn't say anything, I take it upon myself to speak again.
"Fuck your dad" I hush quietly. I see his head turn up slowly.
The silence after becomes unbearable. Im afraid hes going to get up and leave, but he doesn't, he just sits and stares at me, which in a way is worse. Im afraid I've upset him.
Its pitch black out now, and the temperature has dropped by a tonne, although the breeze is gone, and everything seems to be stood very still.
No sounds of trees whooshing, or the wind rummaging around in your ears, just, quiet.
Im just about to try to say something else, when im interrupted.
"Why" he says gradually, his tongue getting mixed up, "why are you being so nice to me" he says quietly, "all of a sudden."
I don't say anything, mostly because I don't even know myself.
Hes sat slightly drooped, with his shoulders curved over a little, but his head is leaned foward.
I can't really see his face properly, but his hair is pretty messy from his constant touching it.
He loves to touch his hair.
And without thinking, and completely on instinct, I lean foward a little closer, closing what little gap was left between us.
His breath catches, and suddenly not a thought in my head is making sense.
I don't know what im doing. Our noses are practically touching, and he seems to have frozen, sat more still then I've ever seen him.
I stare at him, and he stares back.
Neither of us turn away.
Then before either of us can turn away, I tilt my head a little bit, and press my cold lips to his.
Hes hesitant at first, and doesn't move as I kiss him. Until he moves a little closer to me too, and kisses back.
His lips are rough, the sour, prominent taste of Vodka still clinging onto his breath. He smells of smoke, cloudy and distant.
I wonder what hes thinking.
I wonder what I'm thinking.
Everything feels like a buzz, nothing feels real. Nothing feels good, or bad. Only inbetween.
My hand moves to his leg, my tongue swipes against his top lip, trying to push things further. But thats when he pulls away. Im closer to him now then I thought.
His eyes are kind, but confused.
Again, neither of us speak.
We both just continue looking.
Minutes go by like this, until George takes back out his cigarette packet and pushes another between my lips with a laugh.
He doesnt even allow me to object, yet its not like I plan on it. I let him light it.
Still not a word has been spoken. He lights his own too, and each time he breathes out, I can still feel his breath hit against my face. It smells strongly of alcohol, and tobacco.
Im the first to actually move away. I sit back a little, before clumsily standing up and smiling at him.
"Cmon" I mumble, "its late."
Whatever had been spoken about or whatever had happened has already slipped from our drunken minds as we both laugh our way back up to our dorms.
We have to stop outside to compose ourselves in an attempt to look sober, and as if to act as if we hadn't just spent an hour and a half outside drinking and smoking.
George trips once or twice up the stairs, and I do laugh at him, but its okay because he laughs too.
He has to grip onto my arm as he stumbles down the hallway. We do eventually reach his room, though.
"But what about my things" he whines, like a child.
"Ill bring them tomorrow" I assure him, knowing damn well I'll barely remember any of this tommorow. But he seems satisified enough with this answer.
"You know" he remarks, "you're actually, alright."
I chuckle. "Thanks, you're not too bad yourself."
"See you tomorrow?"
"If I'm still alive after tonight" I giggle.
He laughs again, so I do too.
"Night" he smiles.
"Night, George" I hush, already slipping down the hallway.
Now what I hadn't considered about this situation was having to deal with Sapnap. And having to come up with a story, whilst drunk.
I knock on our own dorm door, which was my first mistake. Sapnap opens the door and gawks at me.
"Hi" I grin.
He stares. "What do you mean, 'hi?'" he shoots, "where were you?" He pulls me into the room. "Do you know what time it is?"
"I was in the library" I laugh, poking him in the cheek.
He looks very, very confused at first, but then his nostrils flare, and he pulls me closer to him, sniffing dramatically before pushing away.
"Were you smoking?"
I sit on the edge of my bed, but Sapnap follows, now sniffing again.
"Were you drinking?!" he shoots even more suprisedly then last time.
I can't even answer him though, my mind is so scrambled I can barely even form a coherent sentence for the life of me.
I flop back onto my bed, a wide smile on my face. All I know is that my bed is comfy, comfier then I've ever been able to remember it.
"Holy fuck" Sapnap says, watching down over me. "You're seriously out of it, dude, are you okay?"
"M better then ever" I manage to whisper up to him, before I completley black out, the rest of the night being nothing in my mind except a big grey blur.