The last two weeks before graduation fly by too quickly. Kate's managed to weasel her way into Brendan's life again. He claims it's not how it seems. They aren't together. Of course, I can see that it's more than friendship they have together.
I try not to let it bother me. I have to move on from him. I have to leave him behind when I leave high school behind.
The ceremony is nice, but I'm ready to leave it behind. High school. Those four years of up and down. Highs and lows. I'm ready for that to end so I can continue to college.
I've been accepted to Pearlin University. I'll be out of state, figuring things out myself. It'll be good for me to meet new people and step out into the adult life.
Drew approaches me as I walk with my mom to the car once the graduation ceremony is officially finished.
"Lili!" He calls, rushing toward me, holding onto his cap tightly. "Lili, wait!"
I turn around, facing him. "What?"
"You've got to come over tonight," he says, out of breath from running. "I'm holding a final party for the class of 2016."
"I would love to, but-"
"She will be there," my mom finishes for me.
I raise my eyebrows at her. We were supposed to be going to Missouri to visit my aunt tonight, but I guess I won't be doing that after all.
"Thanks, Miss Carols," he nods politely to my mom.
"Course," my mom smiles brightly.
Drew turns around and starts running back towards the other side of the parking lot, but then he stops abruptly, facing me again.
"Eight o'clock, Lili! Be there!" He yells.
I give him a thumbs up, smiling in his direction. Maybe it will be nice to have one last immature night before the real life starts.
<•>•<•>
I'm ready by seven thirty, wearing simple black jeans and a white V neck. I curled my hair when I got bored, and my blonde hair falls down to my waist.
'Need a ride over?' -Brendan
'No.'
'Alright, I'll be there in five minutes, be ready.' -Brendan
'I hate you.'
'You couldn't possibly.' -Brendan
He's right. I could never hate him. I went by the other day and explained that his friendship was all I needed. Being together was never meant for us, I don't think. It wouldn't have worked out the way I would have liked.
The knock on my door comes all too soon, and I walk out into the darkening sky with Brendan at my side.
I'm about to open up the passenger side door, but then I realize that it's currently occupied. Kate sits there, scrolling on her phone. I take a deep breath in and resist the urge to reach my fist in there and knock her teeth out.
I pull open the back door and hop inside with a huff. Brendan starts the car, obviously not noticing my bother by his cute little companion. Was she invited or did she invite herself on this car ride?
"So," Kate says in a pleasant voice. Too pleasant. "Lili. You've been to many parties?"
"Not really," I reply calmly as I can.
"Pity," she says. "Is it just because you aren't hardly invited? Or are you naturally anti-social?"
Shut up, is what I want to say. Along with a nice flick to the back of her head. But I just let out a short breath and reply, "I'm not much of a partier, I guess."
"Hm," she nods her head thoughtfully. "Brendan and I used to go to every party together. Every single one. Right, Brendan?"
Brendan looks over at her for a second, eyebrows raised. It's evident he hasn't really been listening. "Uh," he sounds unsure. "Yeah, I guess."
"And Lili, did you ever go to parties with Brendan?" Kate asks. "You know, when you actually were somehow a couple?"
I clench my jaw, willing myself not to say anything I'll regret later on. "Not many, no."
"Hm," she says again. "I wouldn't want to take someone like you to many parties either, I don't think."
I stay silent, once again, trying to contain the foul words I want to scream at her. I have to literally hold back my hand so I don't knock her in the head.
"Who invited you to this one?" She asks.
"Drew," I reply blankly.
"Oh, right," Kate says with a girly giggle. "Wasn't that so nice of him, Brendan?"
"Hm?" Brendan asks again, taking his hand off the radio buttons. "Yeah, sure."
"He really is a nice person," Kate says. "I mean, Lili, he took you under his wing this year. A nerdy loser like you really needed him to boost your confidence. What a kind thing to do."
I'm about to explode. "Pull over," I say firmly to Brendan.
He does so, looking back at me, shocked. He's about to ask something, or say something, but instead, I open the door and get out of the car. I can not listen to another word that girl has to say.
Brendan steps out of his car, but I'm already walking.
"Wait!" He calls to me. "Lili!"
I don't stop. In fact, I move faster than I was before.
Brendan drives forward a small way so he's right beside me.
"Please get back in the car."
I continue pressing forward, fuming with anger.
"Lili."
"Go to your stupid party with your pretty little girlfriend, Brendan. I'm not getting back in," I reply coldly.
"She's not my girlfriend-" he starts.
"Go away."
He does. He drives up the road, leaving me back here, still walking up the road before Drew's house. It's already starting to cool down outside. I wrap my arms around myself and press forward, fury still running through me.
Who does that girl think she is? Who says stuff like that? And why did Brendan just sit there? It will never make sense to me.
Maybe this party was a mistake.
I'm about to turn around, but a new car pulls up beside me. The window rolls down, revealing Danny. He smiles warmly.
"Hop in, chica," he says.
I don't reject him. I get into the passenger seat gladly, and he starts driving again. Some Killers song is on the radio and I turn it up, wanting to drown out the thoughts of the conversation I just endured.
"You okay?" Danny asks.
"I'm fine," I reply.
"You look pissed," he says.
"That's because I am," I say shortly.
"So you're not fine."
"I was being polite."
"Alright," he sounds amused. "What was it?"
"Tall blondie, high heels, fake smile. Take a wild guess."
"Kate?" He asks.
"Precisely."
"What'd she do this time?" He asks, rolling his eyes. We both share the same dislike of the girl.
"Just telling me how much of a loser I am. Oh, and how nice it was of you guys to take someone in need of a confidence booster under your wing," I say. Even recalling her words make me feel furious.
"You know that's not even close to right, yes?" He asks after a moment.
"Sure."
"Really, Lili," he says.
"Yes," I reply.
When we get to Drew's street, it's apparent that we can't park on it. Cars cover every side of the road. Danny stops where we are, moving his car to the curb. We both get out, and walk the rest of the way.
When we get up to his porch, we're faced with loads and loads of teens. Some I recognize, others I don't. All of which don't notice Danny and I walk in.
He threads his arm through my own, as to not lose me in this crowded front area. It doesn't get better the further in we move. My claustrophobia tendencies are starting to kick in. I breathe in and out deeply, trying not to freak out. But it's too hot and smells like sweat. Maybe I really am not used to parties, or cut out for them.
Danny leads me into the living room area, where there happen to be at least ten couples making out. I try to ignore it, as the pumping music practically bursts my eardrums.
Danny seems to sense my discomfort and changes paths, through the hallway. We find a pathway into the game room. Not as many are in here. I do recognize a few, though. Mandy and Drew are at the air hockey table, watching two other people play. They wave when they see Danny and I.
"Hey guys," Drew says. Then he smiles at me. "Glad to see you came." Then his eyes travel down to my arm wrapped around Danny's and his eyes widen. I release Danny instantly.
"Have you seen Brendan yet?" Drew asks, looking behind us. "I thought he said he was going to pick you up, actually."
"He did," I reply, annoyance evident.
"What, did he kick you out or something?" Drew asks, quirking an eyebrow.
"No," I shrug. "I got out."
"I see." He doesn't push me for further information, and I don't give him any. "Well, we were about to start a game if you would care to join?"
"What sort of game?" Danny asks.
"Spin the bottle," he holds up a Coke can.
"Fine be me," Danny replies, smirking. "But doesn't that seem a little iffy for you?"
"Why would it?" Drew asks.
"You've got a girlfriend," he says.
"She's playing too," Drew says. "We're cool. It's all good."
"If you say so. Yeah, we'll play," Danny says, then turns to me for consent. I nod my head. Though I've never actually played this game, there's a first time for everything. And considering I'm headed off to college in a few weeks, it might be my last too.
"There he is," Drew smiles at someone behind us. Brendan and Kate walk over, looking surprised to see me here as well. "Come play."
The circle consists of me, Drew, Mandy, Danny, Brendan, Kate, George from history, Dillan from math, and Caitlin from English.
"I'll start," Drew says, taking his can and spinning it on the table. A lucky spin, because it lands on Mandy. He gladly leans in and touches his lips to hers.
"I think it's rigged," George says.
"Only one way to find out," Drew nods to him.
George spins it, and it lands on Danny. After a refusal on both end, he respins. It lands on me. I look up, surprised. Danny's laughing, and so is Drew.
"Whew," Drew says. "Go for it, dude."
"You okay with that?" George asks me, eyebrows raised.
Though I'm not entirely comfortable, I shrug. "Why not?" So he leans in and his lips barely touch mine.
"Are you kidding? No, no, no, try again, dude," Danny says.
George shrugs, leans in again, and kisses me full on. Once he returns to his seat, there are some wolf whistles, some clapping. The only person seemingly bothered by this is Brendan, who stares at me, an unreadable expression on his face.
Kate takes the can next, spinning it with her fingers crossed. When it lands on Brendan she giggles happily, leaning in willingly. She takes Brendan by the collar of his shirt, and kisses him. An unpleasant taste enters my mouth and I feel sick. I can't help myself from staring as Brendan leans away, smiling as people clap once again for him.
Kate's eye finds mine and her confident look to me says it all. I've lost this battle. She's got Brendan around her finger. But the joke's on her, really. Because I'm getting over Brendan. I have to one way or another.