I run my hands down Ashley's ass and squeeze. She continues her licking up the side of my neck and I groan, feeling close.
"You are so hot, Maxon." She whispers in my ear then lightly bites down on it."The sexiest man I've ever seen."
I continue silently thrusting into her and soon she's screaming out her release. I come soon after her and the moment she collapses onto my side—breathless—I get up, disposing of the condom.
She giggles as she sees my still semi-erect dick.
"Come back to bed." She gets on her hands and knees and proceeds to crawl over to the edge of the bed where I'm getting dressed.
She drops a kiss over my jeans right over my groin and I step away. "I need to head home, Ash."
She sticks her bottom lip out. "Why? It's not like you have a girlfriend or wife waiting for you."
I bare my teeth. "Trust me if I did I wouldn't be here with you."
Ashley has been my lover for almost a year now but I fear she's growing too attached. And to be honest, I'm also growing a bit bored of this lifestyle. This can't happen for much longer. She's beautiful but I just don't see us being a couple. There is no connection between us other than sex which is kind of sad.
She crosses her arms causing her perky breasts to appear even bigger. "I'm trying not to get offended, Maxon."
I shrug, needing to get home soon. "I'm not the cheating type, Ash. If I wanted to be your boyfriend the first thing I would've done is take you on a date."
Her brown eyes sadden and a part of me feels bad but I really think this needs to end soon. "Ashley..."
She waves me off. "I get it. Call me when you want to hook up next time."
I stare at her for a while, grab my keys and phone and leave.
***
I make it back to my penthouse and immediately get in the shower. Since my best friend, Luke, is staying with me this off-season, I don't want him to know where I've been. I value my privacy as much as I can. But I walk in and no one's there. Thankfully.
In the shower, I can't help but think how this void in my heart won't fill. I run a hand over my chest. Ever since my girlfriend—or ex-girlfriend—and I broke up I've been feeling such emptiness and darkness in me. For the past two years, this is all I've felt. I don't know what to do.
Being with Ashley fills it for a moment and football helps numb these feelings but at the end of the day, I still feel as if something is missing. Will I ever love again?
The thought aches. I want to love. I want someone I can be myself with and she will accept me for me. Will I ever get so lucky to find her? Or will they just use me for my money and fame? I hate that bitter thought but it's already happened to me.
I exit the shower and wrap a towel around myself. I walk into my room and look for a new pair of jeans and a long sleeve.
I find both and as I dress I stare out at what is New York. Amongst all this color and chaos, I feel nothing stirring awake in me. Almost as if I'm the living dead. I cringe and sit on my bed.
Many may see me as that football player. Only as a figure and not a man. I'm human. I love football but the spotlight and events bore me. What is it that I need in my life? Why can't I fully accept the life I've fought for and have accomplished? What is it that I am missing?
God, if Luke heard any of these thoughts he would probably laugh right in my face and shove a beer at me. Or a tequila shot knowing him.
A door closes and opens and I know Luke is back from wherever he's been.
"What time does your flight land tomorrow?" His voice resonates through the otherwise empty penthouse and I exit my room, running the towel over my hair and throwing it in the laundry room after. I leave my negative thoughts there too for that matter. Following the sound of his voice, I find him in the kitchen. He's on the phone looking agitated.
"Jesus Christ, Ness. I won't forget to pick you guys up." He runs a nervous hand through his sandy-blonde-colored hair. "I-okay. Got it. Bye, sis. I love you. See you tomorrow." He hangs up and I approach him. "Hey man, everything okay? Was that Vanessa?"
He turns to me with a pale face.
I haven't seen Luke's little sister in months but I know only she causes these reactions in him. Otherwise, he's unfazed by pretty much anything.
"That was her alright, said she's flying out for the party tomorrow."
I raise a brow, waiting for a further explanation.
"She also said if I fail to show up on time to pick them up she'll..." He grimaces, swallowing hard.
"She'll what?"
"She'll cut my balls off and sell them on eBay. Said girls would give anything to have me by the balls. Literally." Another grimace.
A moment of silence then I burst out laughing.
Luke lets out a low growl, "It's not funny."
That makes me laugh even harder.
"Dude, stop laughing."
"Alright, alright." I concede, tears falling from my eyes. "I'll stop." I wipe them away.
"I thought she would've forgotten by now." He groans. "Ness will never let me live it down."
"Of course, she won't." I scoff. "You left her planted at the airport for hours idiot. Even I wouldn't let you live it down."
Luke gives me a hard glare.
I chuckle, heading for the fridge.
"Lighten up, Carter." I pull out a can of beer and toss one to him. He catches it smoothly. That's what years of football will do to you. I've known Luke Carter since my freshman year of college. We met at one of the team parties and hit it off pretty well. I never knew the definition of a best friend until I met him. Being an only child, I usually kept to myself.
Still do, to be honest. I like to keep my circle of friends small.
He smirks. "Speaking of getting in a cheerful mood, there is a beautiful light right at the end of the tunnel. Or getting on a plane." He snickers.
I raise a brow. "Oh yeah? Why's that?"
He tosses me a side grin as he sips from his can. "Vanessa is bringing a special guest."
I stare at him waiting for him to elaborate and it doesn't take long before he does. "Miss Madison Rosales."
My heart stops then immediately picks up its pace at the name. "Do you remember her?" He asks and I nod.
How can I forget the most beautiful girl I've ever seen? When Luke met her in person he wouldn't stop going on about how hot Vanessa's best friend was. He spoke about how he wished she was single but was dating this guy. I'm not going to lie, I got curious about this girl, and one day Vanessa posted a picture of her and a gorgeous girl at the beach together on Instagram. #beachbabes #mybff
I knew immediately this was the girl Luke was referring to. I decided to click on the image to see if she was tagged and she was but unfortunately her account was private. But God, the girl was beautiful. Luke wasn't kidding when she said she's hot but something...something about her tugged at me. I couldn't explain it then and I can't explain it now. The thought of seeing her firsthand has my palms growing sweaty.
"Yeah," Luke goes on. "I can't wait to see, Mad."
Mad. "Are you close?" I ask carefully and he only shakes his head. "Nah, I wish but I've already been down that road. Ness would literally kill me if I try to make a move on her best friend."
It's true. A few years ago Luke was hooking up with one of Vanessa's best friends behind her back and to say she was upset is an understatement.
"Why invite her then?" I ask genuinely curious. Luke wouldn't just invite anyone without a motive.
He throws a devilish grin, a mischievous twinkle in his eye. "Because why not? Things are getting boring around here and we need to spice it up."
I frown. "We're on off-season Luke. We're supposed to be resting."
He begins walking away, toward the living room but before he's out of view he says. "I have a feeling that will be so far from the truth this time. Trust me, man, I'm doing this for not only my sake but for yours."
My brows furrow. What the hell is that supposed to mean? He better not play matchmaker because I swear to God, I will never let him live it down.