Chapter 19
KINABUKASAN nagising ako ng tila hinuhukay ang sikmura. Dali-dali ang pagtakbo ko sa banyo ng magising.
Binuksan ko agad ang takip sa bowl para isuka ang tila lumalabas na kalamnan sa sikmura ko. Halos ang kaloob looban ng tyan ko lumalabas na sa kakasuka ko.
Ilang minuto pa ata bago ko naramdaman ang kaonting pagkahinga sa nagyari. Naiiyak akong napasandal sa tiles ng banyo. Halos habol ko ang paghinga sa nagdaang minuto ng pagsusuka. Ramdam kopa ang akmang pasusuka pero pinipigilan kolang dahil sa tubig o kaya ay pagsusuka nalang talaga at wala ng ibang lumalabas.
Damn what is this? Why do i feel like im dying? Parang mawawalan ako ng ulirat sa pagsusuka. Nanghihina ang katawan ko.
Nagpatawag ako ng breakfast sa kwarto ko pero tubig lang ang naipasok ko sa tyan.
They also serve garlic fried rice that leads me to vomit the water i drink.
Halos mahilo ako habang sinusubukang pakalmahin ang sarili. Nakaharap ako sa salamin sa bathroom ko . I look sick! Namumutla ang labi ko at halatang di nagsuklay ang buhok, i tried to comb my hair in my finger and bite my lips to atleast give it some color. But still, i look like dying..
Why am i feeling this... could it be? That im...
Damn! Kahit sa pagiisip lang hindi kopa masabi.
Damn!.. am....i??... ..
Fuck! No. It cant be, this cant be....
Nagmadali akong maligo kahit may parte sa katawan ko ang sumasakit. Its not fucking usual. Ngayon kolang to naramdaman , ever. I need to see saddy. Atleast i need someone whom i can trust trully and thats saddy. Shes the only one.
Sa mabilis na kilos ay nagayos ako at tinawagan si saddiana para magpasundo sa kanya. I dont want to drive right now.
Nasa kotse na ako ngayon ni sadh, at papunta kami sa isang restaurant para magbreakfast.
"Jess.. are you really okay? Kanina kapa you dont look like youre fine to travel. You look really pale, and look sick. Are you okay?."
Tumikhim ako at hinilot ang sintido habang nakaakay sa nakabukas na bintana ng kotse ang braso at masuyong minamasahe ko ang ulo na sumasakit.
"These is nothing sadh. I just need some fresh air."
Binuksan nya ng mas malakas ang aircon ng kotse nya at itinutok nya sakin. I then sighed at contented. Huminga ako ng maayos sa malamig na buga ng aircon.
Nagpalipat lipat ang tingin ni sadh sa kin at sa daan. Kumunot ang noo nya.
"Really, jess.. you look sick!. Namumutla ka, wait... ill call Mrs. Salvatera to have an appointment-."
Yeah! Kanina kopa din nararamdaman ang pagkahilo at pagsusuka. Sumasakit din ang ulo ko lalo pa dahil sa ugong ng sasakyan. Parang umiikot ang mundo ko.
Ngumiti ako sakanya, " im fine, saddy. Medyo nagsusuka lang ako kase may nakain akong panis na ata kahapon ." Pagdadahilan ko, ayoko rin namang mag assume na meron na ngang laman to, at isa pa natatakot akong magconclude na agad sya kapag sinabi ko ang tingin kong dahilan ng pagsusuka.
Kumunot pa lalo ang noo nya.
"And dont worry im just vomitting, not disfunctional. Nakakalakad panaman ako sadh. Dont be too overreacting." Sinamahan kopa ng pagtawa para ipakitang ayos lang ako. But the truth is that im afraid.
And im... scared.
What if im pregnant?
Paano sya? My family will surely wont accept this. But Andrew is surely be happy about this.
And speaking of him, he texted me this morning, inform me about the special meet this day. And thats our first Date.
Pero ngayon pa ba ako magsasaya? Ngayong tila may dinadala akong malaking responsibilidad.
Ano nalang ang gagawin ko, its not as if i dont accept him/her. Im just scared that its not the right time para mabuntis. Not the rigth time because this child might gain judgement comes from my family and i cant accept that.
"Honestly, sadh im fine. Medyo sumasakit lang ng kaonti ang ulo ko pero nakainom naman ako ng gamot kanina , magiging maayos din ako." I assure her when i can see the annoyed of her face.
"Jess... im still worried. Hindi mo maalis sakin yon when i can clearly see paleness in your face."
Napabuga ako ng malalim na paghinga sa mga sinasabi nya, shes too makulet!
"Saddy, im fine."
"No! Youre not! , we would meet Mrs. Salvatera now."giit nito.
Hindi na ako umangal baka mas lalo lang mapahaba ang usapan. At baka san pa mapunta.
After we finish our breakfast, tinuloy nga nya ang sinabing pupunta kami sa personal doctor nya.
"WHAT DO YOU FEEL?"
Tanong sakin ni Dc.Salvatera.
Nasa loob ako ngayon ng office ni Mrs.Salvatera para icheck ako at uunahin muna ang nararanasan kong kakaiba lately sa katawan ko. Nasa labas si Saddiana at hinihintay ang pagcheck-up sakin.
I cleared my throat, "i lately feel dizzy when im trying to walk, and this morning i vomit really hard. Ngayon kolang maramdaman ang ganoong pagsusuka doc. And also im really uncomfortable when i smell something fishy."
Tumango ito, "is that all?".
"And i dont like the smell of sauce garlic."
"Hmm... that means naglilihi ka"
Itatanong kopa sana kung ano yung naglilihi. Pero nagtanong ulit sya kung ano pa kaya napilitan akong sagutin pa ang tanong nya.
"My nipples are getting hard. Lalo na po kanina when i bath, it feels like getting hurt when i touch it."
"Okay.. sensitive nipples."
Ilang sandaling pinagaaralan nya ang naisulat bago tumingin sakin at ngumiti.
"We dont need too much examination about your health. You can clearly named your condition."
Tumaas lang ang kunot noo ko sa sinabi nya.
"It means your pregnant. Congratulation!" Ngumiti ito, at tila siyang saya sa nalamang balita.
"D-doc baka naman po nagkakamali lang kayo."
I cant get over this, liban sa ayaw ko talagang maniwala, mas ayoko namang paniwalaan ang haka haka nya. Na base lang sa itinanong sakin.
Nakangiti parin sya, " No im very sure your pregnant, but if you dont believe then we would do the urine test and i suggest you do the pregnancy test to make it double check."
Tumayo na ito at parang may kinakalkal na bagay doon sa cabinet nya. Inabot nya sakin ang tatlo agad na alam kong pregnancy kit.
"Here, do it!".
Sa nanginginig na kamay ko ito tinanggap at saka mahigpit na hinawakan pagkatapos kong matanggap. I feel like its a life and death. Im freaking nervous.
Dahan dahan lang ang lakad ko papuntang c.r. para sa gagawing test.
I did what whats the guide on the kit. And when im about to do it when my phone rung. Its Miyan.
Hindi ko muna sana sasagutin pero masyado ng maingay ang pagring. Binitiwan ko muna ang pregnancy kit at saka inabot ang cellphone. It looks urgent.
"Yes, Miyan?."
"Oh! Hi liese. How are you?."
"I-m f-fine. W-why?." Parang alam nya ang nangyayari sakin ngayon.
"Is the man your with last week, kaano ano mo sya? And are you two have something?" She ask maliciusly.
I cant help but feel nervous. She saw us? And why is she too noise about this? My god, she might spread this.
"Ikaw ah! Wala kang sinsabi. Sya naba ang fiancee mo?" Tumatawa pa sya habang nagtatanong.
"H-huh?."
"I saw you both kiss. My god! you both look good together is he your fiancee they talkng about? Im sorry nga pala liese di ako nakarating nong engagement party mo, you know im a little bit busy that time. Diko tuloy nakita fiancee mo pero nakita ko kayo noon in some korean resto. Is that your fiancee?." Tuloy tuloy na tanong nito, diko alam kung anong uunahin kong sagutin.
"A-ahm... Miyan.. i-its o-okay that you didnt come. Where are you by the way?."
Well yes his atleast my half fiancee, but still i cant say it to her. Im scared and tired for might dissapointment from them. That actually use to see me great and successfull.
Ilang minuto bago sya sumagot kaya tinanong ko ulit.
"Miyan?...hello?. Are you still there?."
"My ghushhh liese. Your fiancee is really so damn hot!." Pabulong nitong tili. She looks like shes in a crawded place. Maingay.
"W-what."
"Hes here. Pero bat iba kasama nya?. Wait ill check."
Nawala sya sa linya but i can still hear some gossips for people talking.
What does she mean his there? And what does she mean that his with someone that it wasnt me? So? Hes with a girl?
Mas lalo ko pa tuloy inilapit ang phone sa tenga para marinig pa sya. It takes minute before she answer again.
"Liese? You still there?."
Lumunok ako sa kaba, "y-yeah. Im still here."
"Oh! His with Dayanarra Mendoza you know her?."
"W-what? What are you t-talking about miyan? The who? and ...with what?."
She laugh, "Oh! Easy there liese. Its your fiancee and his with Dayanarra Mendoza. I bet you know her? Shes with your fiancee eh."
Nablangko bigla ang utak ko at biglang parang wala ng gustong lumabas na letra sa bibig ko.
"You know her right? They talk seriuosly though, seems like they have important matter to discuss. They are too focus on each othe-."
Hindi kona sya pinatapos pa," Where are you right now, miyan?."
Tila nauutal naman syang sumagot,
"I-im h-here at Starbukcs. Liese you okay?"
Naramdaman nya ata ang galit ko kaya nataranta sya bigla,
"Yes, his my fiancee Miyan. So please tell me the exact place."
"Oh! Woah!!! Easy..liese. they are just talking im seeing them. Wala naman silang masamang ginagwa. I just ask you and if his your fiancee, then congratulation Liese. You have a very hot and handsome soon to be husband."
"Im not asking kung may masama ba silang ginagawa just tell me where you are."
"I already told you, but honestly liese i think you need to calm down first. Mukhang uminit ang ulo mo, im not trying to meddle with both of you im just curoius with your fiancee but dont worry, what im seeing right now is nothing to do with your relationship. Dayanarra looks really focus on what theyre talking about maybe they're talking about business."
Napapikit ako sa lito sa mga sinasabi nya, parang gusto kong masuka at nakakahilo. Hinilot ko agad ang sintido kung saan sumasakit ang ulo habang nasa tenga parin ang cellphone.
"Whose that girl?." I simlpy ask more relaxing now.
"Oh?, you dont know her?."
Do i look like i know her? Kung alam ko dina sana ako magtatanong.
"Just tell me Miyan. Im busy right now, so please tell me now." Just a little and ill loose my patience with this.
"Well, sya lang naman ang famous daughter of the 1st Senator in the Philippines, Ghilo Mendoza. Shes a ballet princess and she always bring herself to the top when it comes in balley. You know shes also good in public. Siguro namana nya sa ama nya na maganda ang pakikitungo sa mga tao . Madalas marami syang tinutulungang mahihirap at her age of i dont know if its 16 or 17 when she build a Charity for those Street kids and old. Shes famous because shes beauiful, intellegent and very kind. People use to love her." Tuloy tuloy nyang sagot at talagang pinamukha sakin kung gaano kabuting babae ng ballerina nayon.
Tsk! Pakielam ko sakanya sakin naman si Andrew ea.
"Is that all miyan? Wala kanang alam?, looks like you know her very well." I sarcastically said.
She laugh , " of course i know her liese. Nakalimutan mo atang politiko din sI mommy. I know the circle of politics industry sometimes its true but more on they cheating. And im speaking in general."
I then think, are they part of something like corruption,? Sana nga part nalang sila ng ganon. Para di na ako mahihirapang hanapan sya ng baho kung sakaling may something sila ng andrew ko.
"But you know what liese, i think her father is really good at politics because he began at age of 15 when he started to commit with it. At marami talagang humahanga kay Dayanarra dahil sa bukod na sikat ang ama nya talaga namang maganda, mabait, at talentado din sya. Naku! Ang alam ko crush sya ng karamihang kalalakihan ngayon."
"So?, what do you want to say now miyan?." I ask angryly.
Imbis na kasi siraan nya sakin ang kasama ng alam nyang fiancee ko, talagang pinangangalandakan pa nyang talagang angat ang babaeng yon sa iba ibang aspekto. Hindi naman sa gusto kong siraan nya gusto kolang namang malaman SANA ang kabalbalan nito sa buhay pero mukhang disente itong babae. Tsk!
She laugh but i can sense nervousness, "A-ahm...y-you ask me a-about her kaya sinabi kolang ang alam ko. But dont worry liese i can see that they are not that close dahil mukhang seryoso ang fiancee mo at wala naman akong nakikitang ibang emosyon sa kanya. Kaya mukhang wala naman."
"Atchaka paaalis na ang babae saglit lang naman ang pinagusapan ata nila." She tried to make me better now.
I smile ang sighed, " really paalis na sya?."
"Yeah!, but.......wait..tumayo na sya pero umupo ulit, baka pa may sasabihin."
I ended the call when she said that at agad na denial ang number ni Andrew, i ned to clear somthing.
Ilang ring pa bago nya sinagot,
"Oh! Hello, baby. You excited later?."
Kahit medyo galit ako sa hindi nya pagsabing may kakitaan ngayon medyo nahimasmasan naman ako sa simpling pagtawag nyalang sakin ng baby. Nababaliw na nga ata ako o siguro dala lang to ng pagbubunti ko.
Pagbubuntis ko??
Damn! The thought of it make shiver down my spine. Should i say it to him? Na baka buntis ako at dala ang batang bunga ng pagmamahalan naming dalwa? Should i? Or wag nalang muna dahil hindi panaman sure.
And speaking of which, hindi kopa pala natatapos ang ginagawa.
Rinig ko ang pagkatok ng doctora,
"Ms. Aden are you okay? Tapos kana ba, what is the resault?." Ramdam ko ang galak sa boses nya habang nagtatanong.
"Who is that?." Andrew ask.
"Wait drew." Tinakpan ko ang phone ko at binuksan ng kaonti ang pinto sa banyong iyon.
"Wait lang doc im not yet done with it. Can i have a minute, please.." i smile as i pleaded.
"Okay...okay...take your time just tell me when you done okya?"
Sinara ko ulit ang pinto at muling ibinalik ang phone sa tenga.
"Drew, you still there?."
"Yeah ofcourse baby. Where are you, at anong tinatanong ng kausap mo kanina na resulta ng ano? What are you doing and youre with whom?."
Tuloy tuloy nitong tanong.
"Drew isa isa lang, first im with saddy and were here in Macabali Hospital to have a check-up."
"Check-up? For what? At ikaw ba ang magpapacheck? Thats why the one asking a while ago is talking with Miss Aden?."
"No,"
I think its not the right time to say it.
To talk about my sudden pregnancy.
"N-no... im talking about saddiana. Shes having her every week check up. At sya ang kinakausap kanina ni doctora tungkol sa result ng urine test nya. So how about you? Nasaan ka, at sinong kausap mo? "
Muntik konang makalimutan ang totoong pakay ko sa pagtawag sa kanya.
"Im with my oldbstudent were here at starbucks." Seryoso ang tono nya pagbanggit sa kasama.
Kumunot naman ang noo ko, " Your with whom?"
Ilang sandali pa bago nya sabihin ang pangalan, mukhang nagaalinlangan pa sya.
"With Dayanarra Mendoza."
Oh! Well atleast he said it, atleast he tell the truth. Its enough for me to know that his not lying and his telling the truth.
I smile, " okay ill see you later then, baby."
And end the call as i heard him groaned as i call him my baby. Still laughing as i handed my phone in my bag and continue what im doing a while ago.
I continue what the pregnancy kit guide steps.
Sa nanginginig na kamay ay hawak kona ang resulta.
Damn it! Im nervous and .....excited..
Then it turns two line.
Two line...
Positive...
Damn im P-pregnant.
*************
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