Chapter 36:
The next few days were a blur. After you'd woken again from the initial sedation, the doctor had reassured you that amnesia was a common side effect for someone who'd experienced intense trauma. He was optimistic that your memory would eventually return, you just had to keep your brain stimulated with things from your life.
Unfortunately, there wasn't a lot of that because the young man, whose name you found out was Jungkook, claimed to be your husband, but almost never came in to speak to you. Sometimes he would stand outside your room and just stare until you turned to give him a hard glare, then he would walk away. There was something strange about him, something strange about the way he acted around you. He didn't act like someone's husband. It was almost like he had no idea how to act around you.
You overheard a conversation he had with the doctor the day after you'd been sedated that made you even more suspicious of him.
"Do you know when she'll remember?"
"I'm sorry, sir, it's impossible to tell. Her body was put under extreme duress and trauma and she lost a lot of blood. It was a miracle that she woke up at all. All that's left to do is be patient."
"Is there any way to speed up the process? I just... I really need her to remember."
"Well, if you could bring trinkets from home, sentimental objects, something she has a strong connection to, it could help stimulate her hippocampus. Do you have objects like that?"
"Um... well, not really. We just... moved."
"I see, well if you just sit with her and talk to her, remind her of her life, I'm sure it will help."
"Okay, thank you doctor."
Not only that, but no one seemed to be able to give you a straight answer on what actually happened to you. Your body was weak and it was difficult to get up and walk around every day, like the doctor recommended you do. It felt like every muscle in your body had been set on fire and then burned to a crisp and now it was hard to do even the simplest of movements. You were slowly getting stronger, able to walk a little more every day, but it was still exhausting and painful work.
You asked the nurses what happened to you, but they always avoided the question or ignored you completely. The doctor insisted it was an 'accident', but either nobody knew, or nobody wanted to tell you the truth. You tried asking the man claiming to be your husband, but even he avoided a straight answer. It was making you angrier and angrier, not being able to move correctly and not being able to remember a single goddamn thing.
You were starting to think that there was way more to all of this than just a simple accident. Something horrible had happened to you and you were both determined and a little scared to find out what.
That day, you were taking your daily walk down the hallway outside of your hospital room. You could actually make it to the end of the hallway today and you were feeling very proud of yourself, when you heard a hushed voice coming from the branch that led to the visitor's bathroom. You recognized Jungkook's voice and narrowed your eyes when you heard your name. You shuffled closer, peeking around the corner to see him leaning against the wall, speaking into his cellphone. He hadn't noticed you, so you didn't feel bad as you eavesdropped shamelessly.
"I don't know what to do, Taehyung," He was saying. You pressed your lips together, being introduced to yet another unfamiliar name. "No, she doesn't remember anything... I told you, nothing. Not about us, not about her heritage, nothing... I don't know what to do... She's going to figure something's wrong eventually, if she hasn't already. You know how smart she is..." You blinked, feeling strange at the compliment. "I can barely even look at her, Taehyung. When she looks at me with that... It's just a lot. It's been so long since she looked at me like that and I just can't... Well, what am I supposed to say to her? Just tell her the truth straight up? She'll think I'm out of my mind... Okay, yeah let me know how it goes."
You tried to quickly move away from the hall, or as quickly as you were able since moving was a challenge in itself. So, he was keeping things from you. Apparently something big, something big enough that you might not believe it if you heard it. This whole thing was getting shadier and shadier. He probably wasn't even your husband. He didn't wear a ring, and there was no ring in the bag of clothes that you'd been wearing. There was something seriously wrong. You didn't trust him. You didn't trust any of them.
~~~
A couple days after you'd overheard Jungkook's conversation, you were feeling much better, physically. You could move around again without too much pain and you no longer got out of breath and exhausted after the small menial tasks. The doctor was just about ready to discharge you, and you were more than excited. Being cooped in this hospital room was bad for you, especially considering you couldn't remember anything else.
As you were packing up your room, which didn't really take much time since you only had the one set of clothes, the doctor and nurse came in, followed by Jungkook and another young man, who was about the same height as Jungkook and had the same dark, intense eyes.
"Y/N," You turned at Jungkook's voice and scowled, regarding him with suspicion. You were being discharged into his care, but you already had a plan to get away from him as soon as possible. Since he still hadn't given you a straight answer for any of your questions, you still did not trust him one bit and you didn't want to stay with him if he wasn't going to be honest.
He gestured at the man who came in with him. "This is Taehyung. He's our friend, he's going to help us with your discharge." You narrowed your eyes at the new man, putting a face to the name from the phone call you'd overheard.
"Why? We don't need help filling out paperwork." You snapped distrustfully. Jungkook winced and Taehyung raised an eyebrow. They exchanged a knowing look, which made you angrier.
"It's just..." Jungkook started sheepishly.
"Whatever, can we get this process started?" You cut him off harshly and you saw the new man, Taehyung, quirk an eyebrow in surprise. The doctor exchanged a look with Jungkook before stepping forward.
"Y/N, there is something we haven't told you yet. We all agreed it would be too much to tell you right away and we wanted to wait until you were stronger. Please, have a seat." He patted the bed and you furrowed your eyebrows. You looked at the nurse, who was giving you a sad, pitiful look, then at Jungkook and Taehyung, who shared a cautious expression, like they weren't sure how you were going to react. You looked back at the doctor.
"No, tell me now." You said quickly, your gut flipping in your stomach. Something was seriously wrong, you'd felt it from the minute you'd woken and now they were starting to scare you. The doctor looked over at Jungkook, then back at you and he sighed. You gritted your teeth, feeling desperate. "Don't look at him." You said, waving a dismissive hand at Jungkook. "Tell me, please. Whatever it is, just tell me." The doctor sighed again, but took a deep breath and began.
"When you came to the hospital after your accident," He started, making you scowl at the word 'accident', since you still didn't know what that meant. "Your body had many injuries throughout and you were in a state of shock from the trauma you endured. But, there was something else that happened to you that might still shock you." He pressed his lips together and glanced at Jungkook. "When you came in, you were pregnant."
Your mouth fell open at his words. Unconsciously, your hand lifted to your stomach and you unexpectedly felt nauseous. You sank down on the bed, your legs feeling weak all of the sudden. You swallowed hard as the doctor continued.
"It appeared you were a few weeks along, but I don't think you were aware of it. Your husband was as shocked at you after hearing the news." You swung your gaze to Jungkook, who inhaled sharply. He couldn't look you in the eye. "Unfortunately, because of the trauma and injuries you came in with, we were unable to save the pregnancy." You turned sharply at the doctor's words and felt your throat constrict.
"I... I lost it?" You whispered, your voice not really working correctly. The doctor sighed and touched your shoulder sympathetically.
"I'm very sorry," he murmured. "Unfortunately, the miscarriage took a significantly higher toll on your body than we expected, that's why it took a bit longer for your recovery." He gave you a small squeeze, then he beckoned for the nurse and turned to the door. "I'll leave you alone for now. Please have a nurse page me when you are ready to be discharged."
He and the nurse left, leaving you in the loudest silence you'd ever experienced. You stared at the floor, at a complete loss for words. You could barely process what he'd told you, much less truly understand what it meant. You heard Jungkook cautiously approach.
"Y/N? I'm really sorry about keeping this from you. We just weren't sure—"
"You knew this whole time?" You demanded, cutting him off. Jungkook swallowed, glancing at Taehyung for a second before returning a guilty gaze to you.
"I—yes, I did." He said sheepishly.
You sighed and closed your eyes, feeling nauseous.
"I just... I want to leave." You croaked, trying to take deep, slow breaths, but they were too shaky to control.
"Are you sure? I mean, you can take a bit longer if you—"
"I don't want to!" You snapped, rising to your feet abruptly. Jungkook blinked in surprise, not expecting to outburst. And to be honest, you were a little surprised yourself. "I don't want to be here anymore. This stupid hospital is all I..."
You trailed off, a lump forming in your throat. You gritted your teeth and looked away, unable to finish the thought. Jungkook's face softened and when you stole a glance at him, you saw a swirl of different emotions, the main one: pain. He was regarding you with so much pain, like just looking at you was equivalent to stab in the gut. He wanted to comfort you, but he didn't know how. You felt a pang of guilt for being so difficult with him. It wasn't just you who'd lost something. You lost your memories, but he lost his wife and baby, as it turned out.
"I'm... sorry." You said finally, forcing your hands to unclench and relax. "I know how hard this is and... I haven't been making it any easier."
"You have nothing to apologize for. None of this is your fault." Jungkook said firmly, fisting his hands at his sides. He shook his head quickly and you saw his hand twitch, like he wanted to reach out to touch you, but he was holding himself back.
You took a deep breath, steeling yourself and turning to the other young man, Taehyung. You gave him a smile.
"I'm sorry, I was really rude earlier. It's nice to meet you... again, I guess." You held out your hand awkwardly as Taehyung blinked and straightened up. He seemed different from Jungkook, like he stood a bit stiffer, his eyes were just a bit darker. You felt uneasy, but you shoved the feeling down. If he was someone you'd known and trusted before, there was no reason you shouldn't now. He took your hand and looked up into your eyes.
"Yeah... nice to—" He stopped suddenly, squeezing your hand. He inhaled deeply and you frowned, trying to pull your hand out of his grip. Instead of letting you go, he pulled you closer and inhaled again.
"Hey, what are you—"
"Jungkook, can I talk to you outside?"
Taehyung dropped your hand and took Jungkook's arm, steering him outside before you even had a chance to protest. The door shut loudly behind them and you were left standing there stupidly. What just happened?
You clenched your fists and another wave of annoyance passed through you. More damn secrets. You marched over to the door and were about to fling it open when you heard their voices just outside the door. You turned your head and pressed your ear to the door, straining to hear what they were saying. You couldn't make out full sentences, but you caught a few phrases.
"...smells different, not as strong..."
"...not resistant anymore?"
"...one way to find out... compel..."
You gasped when you saw the door knob turn and you jumped back, the backs of your knees colliding with the bed. Taehyung and Jungkook reentered the room, both staring intently at you. You scowled.
"What was that all about? Some secret meeting about me again? What were you gossiping about this time?" You sneered, not bothering to hide your disdain. Taehyung stepped forward and gave you the most penetrating look that you almost forgot to be angry.
"I need to try something before we leave." He said vaguely, reaching out to take your arm. "If this doesn't work, please don't be alarmed. We will explain everything when we leave the hospital." You narrowed your eyes, your gut twisting in confusion and uncertainty.
"Okay, I really don't know what—hey, what are you doing?" You exclaimed when Taehyung suddenly pressed his face close to yours. He was so close, his nose almost brushed yours and you were completely caught off-guard by the proximity. You opened your mouth to protest when suddenly, his eyes turned a brilliant gold and you lost the words on your tongue.
Your brain felt fuzzy, hazy, like someone had stuck a rod up there and swished around in your head. All you could see was gold. Gold, gold gold...
Remember...
All at once, the memories came back to you, played like a movie in your head. Every childhood memory, the horrible teenage years, the foster homes, the cuts and the bruises. Then your university, Katie and Selena and Caden, your 21st birthday, and... Vampires, blood, fangs, manors and journals, violet eyes, golden eyes, grins with white teeth, an underground bunker, a stake through the chest, electrodes, gurneys, a vegetative body, and—pain!
You screamed and fell backward onto the hospital bed. Jungkook shot forward, catching your shoulders before you fell over and you turned to look at him... seeing him, remembering him.
"Jungkook..." You whispered, tears welling up in your eyes. He was here, he was alive... Jungkook's eyes lit up when he realized you knew who he was and you threw your arms around his neck, pulling him into you.
"You're alive, you're alive..." You cupped his cheek, staring into his deep obsidian eyes, as if seeing them for the first time all over again. They shone, like they were filled with moisture and you gasped when you realized his cheek was warm to the touch, and you could feel his hot breath fanning your face. You shifted back and grabbed his forearms, his skin plush and warm in your palms. Your fingers trembled as you found his pulse on his wrist and held your breath before feeling the steady pumping of blood in his veins.
"You're..." You whispered, looking back up at him with wide eyes. He smiled and nodded, caressing your hand.
"Human," He finished your thought and lifted your wrist to his lips, giving them a light kiss. "Thank to you, I'm human." You let out a choked laugh, your eyes moistening with relief and incredulity. You blinked as the memories of what had happened before you'd passed out in the underground bunker came back to you. You looked around, confusion and panic bubbling up in your chest.
"But..." You looked up at Taehyung and then back to Jungkook. "What happened to Lazarus, and Jimin, and the bunker, and... but how is this even possible? Lazarus' experiment actually worked? How am I alive, then? And how—" You gasped, clapping a hand over your mouth and staring at Taehyung with wide, wild eyes. "How did you do that? Did you just... compel me to remember everything?"
Taehyung sighed and exchanged a look with Jungkook.
"I wasn't sure if it would work. You smell... different now. You usually smell... really strong, stronger than most humans, but now..." He trailed off and you felt a sinking feeling in your chest.
"So that... that means..."
"You're not vampire resistant anymore." Taehyung said, finishing your thought. You let out a sharp exhale, shaking your head incredulously.
"But... how is that possible? I thought the power came from my DNA, since I'm a descendant of Dracula. How could that just change?" You wondered, more to yourself than anything.
"I don't know..." Taehyung murmured, looking down at the ground.
You looked down at your hands, unsure how you felt about the revelation. You didn't feel all that different from before. There was nothing you felt that would indicate you were no longer vampire resistant. You just felt tired, but that was probably from the remnants of your injuries.
"Well, what does Lazarus think?" You asked, looking back up at them. "I mean... where is he, have you talked to him? And Jimin, I mean I'm sure they didn't just let you guys take me away after everything."
Taehyung and Jungkook exchanged another look and you felt your stomach flip nervously.
"There's a lot we need to fill you in on, Y/N."
Jungkook started to recount what had happened to them since he had woken up human in the underground bunker. He told you about how Lazarus was hellbent on using you to turn himself human again and that Jungkook and Taehyung had been outnumbered and outgunned. Then he told you the surprise twist that Jimin killed Lazarus. You gaped in shock.
"He... killed him?" You whispered in surprise. Jungkook nodded and encased your hand in his.
"You were right about him, Y/N." Jungkook said softly. "You believed there was good in him."
"Where is he?" You asked, your heart leaping in your chest.
Jungkook looked at Taehyung, who looked sheepish.
"I... uh—I don't really know." Jungkook said, letting out a sad sigh. You frowned, looking between the two.
"What do you mean, you don't know?" Taehyung crossed his arms, his expression solemn as he recounted what had happened.
"After we brought you here to the hospital, he left. I thought he would be back at the manor, but he wasn't there. It's been weeks and we haven't seen him since." He said somberly. You cast your gaze to the ground, uncertain of how you felt.
"He'll turn up." Jungkook said, but he didn't sound too sure.
"I guess, I shouldn't be surprised. It's a lot for him to work out." You sighed, thinking about Jimin and everything you'd found out about him.
His entire existence as a vampire was a quest to turn back human again. Lazarus had encased him in his greedy clutches and had turned him into a horribly cunning, manipulative jerk who didn't care about anyone or anything except his quest. And then he had the reward in his hands, it was right there and he'd given it up. He'd chosen to save you over his entire purpose for existing. It was something you weren't sure you could ever understand or even attempt to imagine the feeling. You would expect anyone in any kind of similar situation to need time to themselves to figure out who they were now. You just hoped he was okay.
"Wait a minute," You said suddenly, lifting your head back up when a thought occurred to you. "This means my blood doesn't work anymore. That means... I can't turn anyone else human." You stared at Taehyung, who pursed his lips, his expression unreadable.
"The doctors said you lost almost 3 liters of blood. Any more and they wouldn't have been able to save you. You weren't going to be able to turn anyone else anyway." He said, trying to reassure you. you felt a lump in your throat.
"I... I'm sorry." You murmured. Taehyung shook his head at you.
"Why are you sorry? You shouldn't have ever been in that position in the first place. None of this is your fault." He said firmly, giving you a hard look.
"Y/N, there's something else." You looked up as Jungkook touched your hand, giving you a grave look.
~~
You stood in the doorway of the patient room down the hall, staring at the woman lying in the bed. There was ventilator in her mouth and her arm was full of needles and tubes. The heart monitor beat steadily, but she showed no signs of moving. Jungkook walked beside you and put his hand on your shoulder.
"The doctor said it's your decision. She's being kept alive through machines but..."
"But she's brain dead." You said, finishing his sentence. Jungkook swallowed.
"I'll leave you alone." He said softly. He turned and you grabbed his hand, just before he could walk away.
"Don't... don't go far, okay?" You asked, your voice shaking. "I... I just need to say goodbye."
"Don't worry, I'll be right outside." He slipped his hand around the back of your neck and pressed his lips to the side of your head gently. You sighed, closing your eyes as you took in his warmth, the soft thumping in his chest, the breath fanning your face. Reminding you that he was indeed alive and you weren't alone anymore.
He slipped away from you, leaving you alone, standing in the doorway. You took a deep breath and walked into the room, pulling up a chair next to your comatose mother. You sat down and took her hand. Her fingers were thin and bony, her skin rough and dry. She was cold and you pressed your lips together, trying your best not to cry.
You looked at her face, looking over the features that matched yours, save for the hollow cheeks, frown lines, and bird's feet by her eyes. Her hair had streaks of grey and it was sticking up in tufts. This was not what you had envisioned when imagining meeting your mother for the first time, and it broke your heart that you couldn't hear her voice, or see her eyes. But she was here, the woman who'd given birth to you, the woman who'd been tortured and used for two decades while you'd been ignorant to it all.
"Hi mom..." You murmured, your voice cracking. "It's your daughter..." You sighed and looked up at the ceiling, feeling helpless. You had no idea what to say and you were pretty sure you sounded like a crazy person.
"So much has happened. There's so much I wanted to talk to you about. So many questions to ask you..." Your bottom lip started to tremble and lump formed in your throat. "I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry for everything you've been put through and I wasn't there to help you. I'm sorry I wasn't smart enough, wasn't observant enough to get to you sooner." You sighed and dropped your head on the bed, resting your forehead on her palm. "I'm sorry..."
You cried softly, tears spilling onto her blanket and gown. You couldn't tell how much time had passed, but your eyes were red and itchy and your throat felt raw. You squeezed her hand and pressed your lips on her knuckles.
"I'm gonna be okay, mom." You murmured gently. "I found someone and we're gonna be okay. We won't have to worry about anyone coming for us. We're gonna be fine." You sniffed and stood up, lying her hand back on the table. "You're going to be okay too, mom. You can finally rest now. I promise, I'll see you soon."