•OAKLAND, CALIFORNIA•
Julia's POV
"When will you be back?" Nick asked as he laid his chubby cheek on the counter of my vanity.
"Before you wake up." I flashed him a playful smile through the mirror.
"Why can't I go with you?"
"Because baby, this is just for Aunt Liv and me."
His curious hand reached for one of my makeup brushes and started smushing the bristles into the counter before dropping the brush and hopping on the edge of the bed.
"Are you going to see Uncle Andres again?"
"No Polpetta. Why are you so curious all of a sudden? You don't usually care when I go out."
I knelt down in front of Nicolai as he swung his feet over the edge of the bed and I rubbed his knee.
"C'mon, talk to me. What's wrong?"
He played with the collar of my aquamarine-colored slip dress as his eyebrows pulled together.
"How come Danny gets to have a daddy, but I don't? Everybody at school has one too. All the grownups just leave me and don't come back."
"I come back, don't I?"
"Yeah, but Uncle Andres didn't. And my daddy didn't." Tears welled in his eyes.
A familiar deep sigh escaped my lips.
When Nicolai was old enough to understand, I mentioned to him that his dad left us when he was born and that's why he wasn't around. However, I led adults to believe I simply was keeping his father's death a secret from Nicky until the right time. If I had known it would weigh on him this heavily, I would have been honest from the jump- well, my definition of honest. Nicolai held secrets like a vault held money, but got pretty loose-lipped if he wasn't thinking about it. He's six, what did I expect.
"Come here baby," -I wrapped my arms around his small torso and rubbed his back soothingly- "I know it can be hard not having your dad around, but me, Andres, Aunt Liv, Lovey, Nonna and Nonno are always going to be with you. Even if we leave for a little bit, we'll always come back to you. You hear me?"
A delicate sniffle echoed from behind my ear as I felt Nicolai's chin nod against my shoulder.
I stroked his fluffy hair, my fingertips tangling within the curls as I pressed my son into my chest hoping to sap some of the sadness he was feeling from his yearning heart. These were the times that I longed for those nights Andres and I spent together to have made a difference-maybe then Nicolai's father would be Andres instead of his demon brother.
My chest heavily rose and fell and I firmly laid my lips against Nicolai's forehead.
"How about tomorrow we spend the day doing what you want to do. The whole day is yours. Sound good?"
A similar silent nod brushed across my shoulder.
I tightened my hold and closed my eyes.
"Mommy is sorry things are the way they are. All I can give you is my love and hope that makes up for what you don't have. Is just Mommy's love okay?"
"Yeah", -he finally loosely returned my embrace- "your love is good."
• • • •
An hour had passed since Nicolai opened up to me and I was now trying not to blind myself while putting on eyelashes. Daniel had shown Nicky this new online game they could play together, so the moment I pulled out my makeup, he abracadabraed himself out of my room. I was just happy he'd finally made a friend.
I slicked my hair back into two space buns as I slammed my hand on my speaker, unable to rid my mind of fluttering thoughts.
I expected Liv to be running into my room by now telling me she'd be ready in five minutes that would definitely turn into another hour.
"Got my purse, wallet.... where's my phone?"
I tossed my failed outfits from the bed, flipped my comforter, but still came up empty.
"Where is it!?" I shouted as an excited knock rapped against my door.
"Hey Jules, I'm ready. C'mon."
I snatched my purse and shoes and stepped out, deciding to forget it for now.
"Coming."
• • • •
The crystal moon settled comfortably over the night sky as Olivia drove through the cities of Northern California. We passed so many restaurants and clubs that I'd lost count and was beginning to lose patience.
The only soothing familiar sight was the ocean glimmering under the night sky a few miles away.
We passed a sign reading "WELCOME TO EUREKA!" and I noticed the passing fancy beach homes.
"You lied. You said we were going to a party in San Fran."
"I said we were going through SF, not to it."
Where are we going Liv? We've been driving for hours."
"I know." She replied bluntly.
I rolled my eyes, "If I knew it was just a house party I would've dressed down. I hate being the odd one out."
"What? You look amazing. Plus that dress makes it look like you got a bbl."
"I did," I say, my face going flat.
"Shut up. No, you didn't. I would've gotten one too if that was the case." Olivia's stomach jumped from laughing as she pulled into a long darkened driveway.
"How long are we staying Liv?" I swung my door open and stepped out.
"As long as it takes." She mumbled under her breath, the words barely audible.
"Huh?"
She grabbed her purse from the backseat and circled the car, "I said as long as you want Roe."
A friendly smirk pulled at my mouth, knowing we were now in character.
Olivia and I pushed our way through the half-drunken crowd. As we made our party rounds, we saw a couple of people Olivia used to hang with when I left for Cardiff with my mom.
I was lonely and felt excluded from nearly every conversation. Being surrounded by all these friendly masked faces brought me back to the parties my ex would bring me to, the few that he allowed me to attend.
Fake smiles and alcoholic infused thoughts. Even the conversations- superficial. I mean, they probably all cared for each other....for the right price.
"Here babe, you look like you need this." Olivia smiled as she handed me a cliché triangle glass filled with peach vodka.
"Thanks."
The familiar scene gave rise to the contents in my stomach as I hurriedly tipped the glass back, drowning some of those feelings.
"I'm gonna see who I know." I lied, jabbing Olivia with my arm and jutted my chin towards the stairway of people.
She nodded, a glint of mystery shining around her irises.
It was still noisy on the second level, but a lot quieter than downstairs. As I admired the minimalistic style of the near-empty hallway I couldn't help but wonder what these people did- or maybe the house was a rental. It didn't really have that lived-in feel and there were hardly any photos.
I turned down another hallway revealing a beautiful wide balcony overlooking the bubbling waves below. Curiosity pulled me outside and I rested on the edge of the balcony, taking another sip. I wretched at the now sour taste of the vodka.
I don't know who mixed this batch, but they definitely needed help. He may have fathered the worst human being since Hitler, but Don Franco could make the best drinks -hands down.
He was one of the few things I missed about living with them. He behaved so differently than how I was told Andres' grandfather acted. Powerful enough to rule three states, but handled everything with such care.
A pleasant breeze wafted past my cheeks, taking my fleeting thoughts with them as I poured the remaining drink into the plants below.
"I wouldn't do that if I were you." A flirty accented voice called out from behind.
My hand jerked flipping the glass from my fingers into the sand below. The voice chuckled as the man I knew to be Daniel's father circled me.
"Don't worry about it, that mix wasn't good anyway."
"You stalking me or something?"
"I don't think that's your question to ask since those are my flowers you killed with your drink."
"Jesus..... So this is your party."
"Are you disappointed?" He squinted and held his mouth open just enough for his tongue to run over his teeth.
"Well, when I'm dragged almost 300 miles away from where I was told I would be tonight, yeah. Not to mention the subpar refreshments here. Of course- no offense um,....."
"Matías." He handed me one of the two glasses in his hand that looked completely different, "Prova questa, Mariposa." (Try this one, Butterfly)
"No thanks."
Matías' shoulders bobbed up and down before he tipped the glass, downing the peach liquid in one gulp and placing both glasses on a side table.
"So, Monroe, you never gave me an answer."
"I'm not aware of you asking me anything, Matías."
"That's a shame. I had our date all planned out too."
A belly laugh erupted from me as I noticed Matias' downcast expression. "You were serious about that?"
He nodded, leaning in closer and taking his lower lip by his teeth as his pupils passed between my lips and eyes.
"Heh, yeah, I don't think so. I know who you are and I've already-" -I cut myself off- "I know who you are."
I've already tried the Underboss wife life, but he didn't need to know that.
"Oh really? What do you think you know about me?"
"I know you're a Russo. Major crime family that I want no part of."
"You have something against us?" Matias' voice turned frosty.
"N-no. I've just heard stories."
I puffed out my chest attempting to maintain my confidence. I'd learned from my ex and Andres that I should never show men fear when alone with them- they'd just take advantage of it.
"Stories aren't fact Monroe. You shouldn't judge based on a biased opinion."
My eyes rolled so hard I nearly detached them from my retina.
"You know you haven't known me long enough to roll your eyes as much as you do."
"I've known you long enough," I smirked.
"Any way I could make it up?"
He cracked a smile that piqued my interest and my armpits suddenly got sweaty. Maybe it was the alcohol, but it was something about the way dimples said hello that made me feel giddy.
"Maybe." I turned my attention back to the sea, "I'll have to think about it."
"How about dinner? I'll cook."
My mind forced my head to shake no, but it did the complete opposite as I felt myself agreeing to the invitation.
"Perfetto. I would ask my sister for your number, but I wouldn't wanna seem more like a....stalker."
"I don't have my phone."
"Well, I guess that means I'll get your number and you'll have to wait for my call."
He beamed as he input my contact info in his phone—the whole time my body burning with attraction. I'd noticed how cute he was before, but his demeanor seemed more controlled and confident this time.
As he returned his phone to his pocket, he sported that million-dollar smile once again before leaning down and placing a kiss on my forehead.
"Talk to you soon." He grabbed his empty glass and returned to the now-filling hallway.
After a few silent moments of watching the shore make love to the waves, I plucked the alcohol from the table and tossed it over the balcony.
I guess one date wouldn't kill me.
A/N: I wanted to pack this chapter with Julia and Matías' whole story, and it took everything in me not to make this chapter like 4000 words. I hope it's not going too slow with them.